“Good!” And then he stomped out again.
The tea still dripped from Romi’s hand. He shook it absently, and then licked it clean, laughing to himself. What a beautiful man. Magnificent even. But such a little snot.
Staying Power: 37
So, finally, they were on the homeward stretch. Romi had to hand it to Karik—he planned the details of Romi’s transport as carefully as any colonel would. The only thing he’d have liked to dispute was Karik’s insistence on Kepi or Taz being his companion during the day. Yes, at night, Karik returned to his side, but they never had a chance to talk, since Romi was exhausted by then. In the day, Romi never saw the man, except as they ate a hurried lunch, or on those few occasions when he was suffering more than usual, and Karik came to the wagon to check on him. There was little to be done of course—the only real solution was to stop travelling, and that wasn’t an option.
The wagon that had, with the ungrudging generosity of the soldiers and people of Selnozi, been refurbished to a high standard, was quite comfortable. It was designed for a small family to live in for months on end, so, while there was little unused space, everything was compact and well-designed, incorporating a small stove, wooden vents in the side with wind guards, and oiled skin panels in the wood and felt covering which let in dull light. Karik had arranged for the floor to be packed with furs and blankets so it was a soft resting place, and the numerous pillows and bolsters he had begged from who knew where, absorbed much of the jolting. At night, the four of them slept packed tightly together in the small space—by day, Romi and whoever was with him could sit comfortably and talk. Karik rode with the wagon drivers. Romi couldn’t help but envy him the fresh air and freedom, though he knew he couldn’t really tolerate the temperatures.
By now, the weather was bitterly cold, and it didn’t take much urging for Kepi or Taz—often both—to join him for hours at a time. It was a good arrangement, keeping him distracted and amused as the endless miles wore on, and when he needed to sleep, his companions helped keep him warm. He needed all the help he could get in the first week, which was the hardest to bear. After that, it was easier, though he couldn’t tell if it was his tolerance improving, or his health. Karik didn’t want to venture an opinion, he said.
The scenery—what little he saw of it—was dull. He poked his head out from time to time, but there wasn’t much to see but snow. He would have loved to have been allowed to jump on a doig and go hunting for winter game, but if the cold didn’t kill him, Karik surely would. He worried endlessly about his diminished fitness, and did what exercises he could in the privacy of the wagon, but until he could walk and run and swim without it being a fatal risk, he wasn’t going to regain his strength. All he could easily do was work on things like his stamina, forcing himself to stay awake during the day and sleeping only at night. As the days went by, this too became a little easier, though it meant the days themselves became longer and duller. It felt sometimes like he had been travelling his entire life, and was heartily sick of it after just two weeks.
He was trying to recall the details of one of the settlement visits for his report when the motion of the wagon changed, then stopped, to his surprise since it was only a few hours since breakfast, and couldn’t be noon yet. He laid book and pencil down and climbed to the back of the wagon, peering through the flaps. Karik rode towards him on his borrowed doig. “One of the wagons has broken a wheel. We’ll have to stop for the day—they’ll have to unload it before they can mend it.”
“I’m getting out.”
“Romi, no—”
“I’m getting out.”
He pulled on his winter gear—yet another piece of generosity from Jiren Palanze—and climbed out of the wagon. Karik had dismounted and tied the doig to the back of the vehicle. “There’s no need for you to get all chilled.” His words blew great white plumes out in front of him—it was a perfectly still day, thick snow all around them and so cold, it would freeze your spit on your lips, though there was an undeniable beauty to the harsh landscape and the grey light that hung over it.
“I’m not—but the wagon is stuffy and I’m getting a headache,” he said. “I promise to go inside in a bit. I just felt like seeing if I remembered what you looked like by daylight.”
Karik gave him a startled, slightly guilty look. “Aren’t you and Kepi and Taz enjoying each other’s company? They said they were.”
“Of course I am. Why don’t you and I go for a walk? I really need the exercise, and if you’re with me, you can’t whine about me overdoing it.”
“I never whine, and besides I should help—”
Romi held his hand up. “Kepi and Taz are over there, and the wagon drivers are perfectly experienced. And I’m the sick man, needing his healer, so I’m pulling rank.”
Karik frowned at him. “You’re bossy.”
“I’m the captain, remember? I get paid to be bossy. Come on. Just a little stroll—even toddlers can do that in Andon. Please, Karik?” He hated being reduced to begging, but Karik could be so stubborn sometimes, admittedly for the very purest of motives.
Finally Karik sighed and agreed, though he still insisted on telling one of the wagon drivers where they were going, as if they were planning an all day outing instead of a walk of a few hundred yards. Only then would he let Romi walk slowly across the pristine snow, away from the eight wagons that made up their caravan, holding his arm carefully. “I really should do this every day,” Romi said. “Even if I wasn’t sick, just lying around would make me soft.”
“If it wasn’t so damn cold, I’d agree—but the cold is a killer.”
“Yes, I know, but the risk is small and, gods, it’s good to get out again.” It was snowing again, just a few flakes here and there. Already the snow was a foot or more deep, and it wasn’t even winter properly yet. “So, how are you enjoying it?”
Karik brightened immediately. “Oh, it’s interesting—they’re good people. When they found out what Pa did, that’s given us a lot to talk about, and I’m learning a lot about this region. It’s not as interesting as the mountainous areas, but it’s very fertile—you know it’s one of the major grain producing areas in Andon. I’ve been taking notes,” he added virtuously.
“I bet you have,” Romi said with a smile. “So...more interesting than coming to talk to me?”
Karik shot him a guilty glance. “I thought Kepi and Taz—”
“Yes, yes—you want to give them time with me before we part, which is very nice of you. I know you don’t want to get too close to me for the same reason, but it’s a little unflattering that you can put me aside so easily.”
“I don’t!” Karik’s cheeks pinked up over the top of his beard and the muffling scarf. “There’s no future in it,” he muttered.
“So that’s that, is it? Because we won’t see each other later, you ignore me now? What about memories? What about enjoying the here and now? Are we not to be friends because we can’t always share time with each other?”
“I’m sorry, “ Karik said quietly. “I was just trying to do the right thing.”
“You were. You are. I’m not criticising you. I’m just saying you have the choice, if you want it. Even if we don’t see each other after we get to Darshek, I will always consider you a friend.”
“So will I!” Karik declared fiercely. “It’s just....”
“Just...?”
“I might never know what happens to you! Like Jou and Sibu and the others—I might never know if you get well, or you die, I just...I hate it!” He stomped off across the snow to a tree stump, standing by it and staring out over the snowy expanse.
Ah. It wasn’t quite what Romi had thought it was, then. He trudged slowly over to his friend, careful not to slip, and then put a hand on Karik’s shoulder. “I’ll write, I swear.”
“It’s not the same! I’ll just worry all the time!”
“I’m sorry, Karik. I know it’s hard. Soldiers do this all the time but it doesn’t make it easy. Just like I don’t suppose it was ea
sy for your parents to see you go off to Andon.”
“I just want....” Karik looked up with reddened eyes. “I’m being childish. It’s not like anything can be done about it.”
“No, it can’t,” Romi said gently. “I know what it’s like to worry about friends. But when it comes down to it, life is always uncertain.”
Karik scrubbed angrily at his face. “I don’t know how to deal with this. Friends who betray me, friends who worry the life out of me—people are too much damn trouble.”
Romi had to laugh at that crotchety declaration. “Yes, they are, but we still need them. Where would I be without my friends, after all?”
Karik stared at him. “Where would I be, you mean. And where will I be when you’re gone?”
Romi manfully resisted the urge to hug the sadness out of his friend. “You underestimate yourself. Look at how far you’ve come, and all on your own. Yes, we helped you when you needed it—but you don’t need us now. You’re doing fine.”
“I do....” But then he straightened up. “Fine. No, I don’t need you. But I’m still going to worry.”
“Of course you will. Just do what makes you happy—that’s all I want.”
Karik’s gaze was intent. “That’s all I want. I mean, for you. I mean, all of you, not just you...oh, damn it!”
Romi patted his shoulder and grinned. “I understand. Now, I think I’ve reached the limits of my endurance for the cold, so why don’t you come and keep me company for a bit. I’d like your help with my report. There are some things I can’t recall.”
“I can do that,” Karik said, and his eager face warmed Romi’s battered heart. He really would miss this beautiful man.
Damn that Soza. If it weren’t for him, Karik would almost certainly come back to Urshek at some point. Fate was very unkind sometimes, he thought, as they walked back to the warmth of the wagon, to enjoy a little companionship before they had to go their separate ways.
~~~~~~~~
Things got easier after that. After a bit more wheedling and negotiating, Karik not only consented to let him go for a walk each day, he even arranged to borrow a couple of doigs to allow Romi to ride a little. The gentle exercise was already helping his fitness, he could tell, and while it tired him, he had plenty of time to recover.
Karik still spent much of the day outside, because he preferred it and Romi didn’t blame him for that at all. But he usually spent at least an hour or two in the wagon, in addition to the little riding excursions, and Romi’s mood was improved just from that simple addition to his daily routine, and the days went a little faster. The journey was otherwise incredibly dull.
A week after the broken wheel, they saw their first farm, and the wagon drivers sent people to buy supplies which made a welcome change in their diet. It was a sign their journey was close to ending, and though it meant sadness in one way for them, there was no doubt that getting home was the foremost desire for all of them. “I want a mug of beer, and a good plain stew,” Kepi declared.
“I just want to be warm again,” Taz said. “Sick of snow.”
“I want to see my family again,” Karik said. “They’ll have so much to tell me.”
“You’ll have a lot to tell them, my lad,” Taz said. “Not many people our age have had this kind of adventure.”
“No—but I think I’ll pass on it next time, if they offer it,” Karik said, grinning over his tea mug. “So, are you two going to move to Temshek, did you decide?”
“Probably not,” Kepi said. “Not that Romi’s not incredibly tempting,” he added with a sly wink. “But my parents still live in Oshek, and it’s closer to Taz’s parents—it’s not like Kera’s family have been horrible to me either. Her father was so upset on my behalf.”
“I can’t imagine them approving,” Romi said. “You never mistreated her.”
“No, and they even said to me they didn’t agree with her choice. She’s their daughter so they have to support her, but they’ve always made me welcome. Her Pa was the reason I got into the army in the first place—he and my Pa have been friends for years. If I move away, I’ll lose all that. Our family and friends are the things that keep us going. I can’t throw that away just to move to Romi’s barracks.”
Romi found Karik giving him the most peculiar look, which he pretended to ignore. “No, quite right. Move if it suits you for other reasons, but giving up your life for one person is always risky. I wouldn’t advise it even if you were planning to marry me.”
Kepi laughed. “Oh, captain, this is so sudden.” He batted his eyelids flirtatiously as Taz disgraced himself again.
“Well, you’re single, I’m single—who knows, we could make a go of it.” Taz was practically choking with laughter now.
“Well, Romi, fine fellow that you are and everything, I do like a nice handful to hang on to, and you really don’t have it where it counts.”
“Breasts are strange things, don’t you think?”
Kepi looked at Karik in surprise. “You don’t like breasts?”
“I didn’t say that. I just think they’re strange. I mean, it must feel strange to have them. I don’t really know where to put my hands,” he muttered. Taz went off again.
“Well, on them, would be my suggestion,” Kepi said, grinning hugely. “You know—like this.” He demonstrated, cupping his hands against his own flat chest.
“But they’re squishy.”
Romi couldn’t resist laughing at their naturalist’s squeamishness. “Karik, I’ve seen you pick up a half-rotten waterfowl and peer at it as if you were looking at the jewels of a kingdom. Are you saying women’s breasts are less attractive than that?”
“No...I just...well, I know what to do with a dead water fowl and I don’t know what to do with breasts, that’s all.”
“Maybe you’d do better with a cock and a pair of balls—you know how to handle those, don’t you?” Taz asked, his face still red from hilarity.
“I don’t know—I’ve never tried,” Karik mumbled. “But at least I know what they feel like. Breasts would be so strange.”
“I wouldn’t worry about it,” Romi said, clapping him on the shoulder. “Since you’re not likely to sprout any. As for where to put your hand, er...practice helps.”
“Going to let him practice on you, captain?” Taz asked, still giggling.
“Don’t be insubordinate, soldier,” he said mock-severely. “You’re embarrassing him.” Karik was certainly turning that most astonishing colour again.
“Sorry, Karik. Romi’s right though—everyone gets the hang of breasts.”
“Maybe I just don’t want to get the hang of them,” Karik said stiffly, looking really annoyed. “Not everyone wants to have sex with women.”
“No, quite true. Don’t get offended, lad. It’s just good fun.”
“Ease up, Karik,” Romi said. “No one cares if you do or you don’t do with whoever. Just don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.”
“I tried it. It was...squishy.” Taz just collapsed again. “Oh shut up, all of you.”
Romi steered the conversation onto less contentious ground, but that had been an odd revelation for sure. Was Karik saying he just wasn’t interested in women, or just that his sole experience of sex had been unenjoyable? But it was nothing to do with him, Romi told himself firmly. Karik would have to do his sexual exploration with someone a little closer to home, and who didn’t mind being his practice run. Romi was done with that kind of thing forever.
Damn it.
Staying Power: 38
When Karik saw the outskirts of Agen come into view in the distance, he whipped his doig into action and rode back to the end of the caravan where their wagon took up the rear, stuck his head through the flaps and gave the others the news. Moments later, all three of them were peering out across the landscape towards the few low towers of the town, just visible against the snow and steel-grey skies. “Finally,” Kepi said. “Wish we could just run over there.”
“Maybe we can. Let
me talk to the head driver,” Karik said. He’d become very friendly with the wagon team, and the head driver had been particularly grateful for the treatment of a painful boil, so he felt they might grant him a favour.
He was back in a few minutes, with one of the drivers and another beast. “Romi? Weikeni says we can ride into town and speak to the barracks in advance if we want. The wagons will be at least another hour, and this would speed things up. If you feel up to it, that is. Or else Kepi and Taz could go in?”
“No, it’s my job, and we may as well get the whole ‘yes he’s a Prij, not really’ dance out of the way, don’t you think?”
Romi dressed in his warm gear and then climbed out to mount the doig. “We’ll see you at the barracks,” he told Kepi and Taz. “Make sure our gear is packed up.”
They saluted, and then he, Karik and Weikeni set off. Even a week earlier, Karik would never have allowed this, but Romi was so much better, and a short ride of a mile or so was well within his abilities now. Besides, Romi was right, there was so much tiresome nonsense about him being a Prij to deal with.
This time, though, it was much easier. With the bona fides that Jiren Palanze had provided for them, and Weikeni’s own explanation of the circumstances, the lep of the port barracks granted them accommodation without any hesitation. “You’re in luck, gentlemen. I happen to know a ship on the coast run departs tomorrow. I’ll send a soldier down to the docks and see if there’s space for four. Otherwise you’ll need to wait another two weeks. There’s not a lot of traffic at this time of year. Er, there is a ship in a week or so, going direct to Darshek....”
“No, thank you,” Romi said firmly. “I must go via Tsikiugui—our friends and colleagues think we’re dead.”
“Fair enough. Get yourselves sorted out here, and if you are leaving tomorrow, we’ll make sure you have provisions and so forth.”
Agen was much bigger than Selnozi, though still smaller than Tsikiugui, and its barracks a larger and less informal establishment. There was no question of their being allowed to roam freely as they had at Selnozi—instead they were shown to guest quarters, and politely requested to remain there, though they were offered every assistance, hot food and clean clothing to wear while their own was hastily laundered. Karik got the impression that the soldiers bearing away their reeking clothes thought it would be better to burn them, but they couldn’t afford to do that. With the hot vents that fuelled this barracks’ heating, the clothes would be dry soon. Just as well—when Kepi and Taz arrived, Romi could tell them that they would all be on a ship to Tsikiugui in the morning.
Staying Power (Darshian Tales #3) Page 49