“He saved my life, Master Kei. I’m the one who’s grateful.”
For some reason, the other man winced. “Just Kei, please. No titles. Right,” he said with a forced-looking grin, turning to his nephew. “Tell us everything from the beginning.”
“Just the important things,” Arman amended, setting the tea and mugs down, while Pira fetched a tray of cakes were being kept warm by the oven. “Romi, perhaps you could start—why were you reported dead when you weren’t?”
Even only hitting the important facts, it was a long story, and Romi was glad they’d had a rehearsal with Wepizi. Kei said nothing during the recitation, and Arman very little, only asking for clarification here and there as needed. When Romi was done and sipped from his now cold tea, Kei looked at his lover. “You said it all smelled wrong. I should have believed you.”
Arman reached for Kei’s hand. “Be fair. None of us had any reason to doubt the team was lost—only the circumstances.”
“Soza’s got our collection,” Karik said, his bitterness over that small betrayal amongst so much else, clear in his voice. “I want it back—he doesn’t deserve it.”
“At the moment, nephew mine, I really don’t give a damn about the collection,” Kei said. “All I care about is that you’re back and alive.”
Arman cleared his throat. “There are obviously issues of injustice to contend with, but let’s not deal with them tonight. I’m sure you want a decent meal and a bath—”
Karik gave a little yelp. “Oh, but Romi! Kei, you need to examine him. I hoped the academy would know more about the marsh bug poison.”
“You’re right, I should do that before anything else. Romi, if you would step along to my workroom? Then I can prepare a report for you to take to the academy tomorrow.”
Karik frowned, as did Romi. “But you can take it with you yourself.”
“I won’t be going there again. Come along, Romi—it’s down the hall. Pira, dear, would you mind setting the bath going?”
~~~~~~~~
Karik waited until they were alone, and then he gave his uncle a stern look. “Will you please tell me what’s going on, uncle Arman? What’s wrong with Kei? And Ma?”
Arman grimaced and got up, busying himself at the stove. Karik could have shaken him in frustration, though it was clear he was using the physical activity as a distraction. “It hit him hard. It hit us all hard, you must know that. But with him—he had all our grief and his own to bear. That was even before he decided it was all his fault and...then your mother....”
“Ma? What did she do?”
Arman turned, his face impassive. “Kei blamed himself for your death. So did she. Very forcefully, very cruelly. And now she’s said she refuses to allow him to speak to her again, or to Reji through her. In fact, she won’t pass any messages from him to anyone in Ai-Albon, not even to Myka or Fedor. She told him...that he was dead to her from now on.”
Instinctively, Karik’s hand came up to rest over the tero stone around his neck. “She did that?” he whispered. “But it’s not his fault—how could it be?”
“Because you work for him and the mission was his idea. The fact that there were dozens of other people involved in the decision and planning made no difference—if anyone was to blame, it was me much more than him.”
“No one was pissing well to blame except Kizinke and Soza!”
Arman raised an eyebrow at his language. “Well, that’s true enough. But Kei didn’t see it that way, and the long and short of it is that he’s resigned from the academy. He hasn’t worked there—or anywhere—since the day after the argument with your mother.”
Karik gasped in shock. “No...no, Arman, that’s wrong! You have to make him go back!”
“Trust me, nephew, I’ve been trying for weeks. It’s all I can do just to keep him going most days.”
“But now I’m home, he’ll go back, won’t he? I’ll tell Ma she can’t do that—I can’t believe any of this. How can she...how can he...?” He looked pleadingly at his uncle. “How can we fix this?”
“You coming home is a start. But that’s all it is. To be frank, I’m at my wits’ end. If you can’t fix it, no one can.” The kettle boiled and he took it from the stove, coming over to refresh the pot with the hot water. “But enough of that—we can’t right the world in an evening. Tell me how things stand with the lieutenant—you’ve mended a few fences there. I’m glad to see it—he’s a good man. “
Karik smiled, though it was an effort. “I love him. Only...he lives in the south. I don’t want to lose him.”
Arman sat down and patted his hand. “Now, don’t fret about that. He’s still seconded to me and I’m guessing that Kei will suggest a period of rest and recuperation for the pair of you. Give us all time to get used to the fact you’re not dead, and then we can see how we can help your love life.” He smiled, but sadness still lurked behind his blue eyes. “I’m sorry, lad. Soza was my mistake. I knew he was a problem, and he shouldn’t have gone with you.”
“We all made a mistake with him,” Karik said, letting a little of the bitterness he was feeling leak into his voice. “Me most of all for trusting him, and not seeing him for what he was.”
Arman squeezed his hand. “Karik...we got reports of an attack on you. Do you want to tell me about that?”
Karik stared, aghast—he hadn’t realised there were other ways Arman might have heard about Visiqe. “Do we have to do that tonight?”
“Of course not. When you’re ready.”
“I’m sorry about Ma. I don’t know why she would hurt Kei like that—she loves him, you know that.”
“Yes, I do, and though I was very angry with her—still am—I know why she lashed out. I did a little lashing out myself. Thank the gods Lord Peika’s such an amiable soul, that’s all I can say. And Lord Meki’s had to listen to me rant more than once.”
All this horrified him. He had no idea his ‘death’ would bring so much harm to those he loved. Grief, yes—but this went further than that. He had to do something about it—but it didn’t look like it would be easy.
Staying Power: 44
Kei went to light a lamp, but Romi forestalled him, throwing out a ring of fire sprites to illuminate the room. “Ah, I forgot,” Kei said with a smile. “I’ve always had a particular fondness for the gift of fire-shaping. It would certainly be less painful than soul-touching.”
Romi shrugged. “It has its uses.”
“No doubt. Now, remove your shirt please.”
His examination, while gentle and carried out with infinite consideration, was very thorough indeed, and Kei closely questioned Romi about every aspect of his health, diet and well-being. “You’re a good way underweight—you and Karik both. Was this the illness or the walking?”
“The walking, mostly. My appetite was hit for several weeks, but most of the weight had gone before that.”
“Hmmm—you will both have to be careful how you rebuild that. We don’t want it to just be fat. Now, I’m going to use my gift to examine your heart—it won’t hurt, I assure you.” He went to place his hands on Romi’s chest, but, instinctively, Romi moved back a little.
“Wait—your soul-touching? How can...?”
Kei laughed a little. “Ah—did my nephew not explain what an oddity I am? I’m a mind-mover too. Yes, I know,” he added, as Romi raised his eyebrows. “Don’t ask me to explain it, I have no idea. Now, please, be calm, breathe normally.”
Romi felt very strange, knowing Kei could kill him with a thought as his gift probed Romi’s heart—he’d never experienced a mind-mover’s touch before. But as Kei promised, it didn’t hurt—he couldn’t feel anything at all. Finally, the healer stood up. “Well, the good news is that I can’t detect any real damage. In my opinion, you should, with care and time, make a full recovery.”
Romi let out his breath. “Thank you. I thought I might have to leave the army.”
Kei smiled. “Not unless you wish to. But it will take time, and you certainly won’
t be back on duty for a month or more—I would say it would be safer to allow three months before you return to full activities. Is that likely to be a problem for your colonel?”
“No—I’m due leave anyway, and I can always be on light duties, if he’s desperate for me to return. Since I’ve been dead, I doubt he’ll mind.” The joke fell completely flat. Kei winced and turned away. “I’m sorry—we’ve all just got used to the idea. Especially me—everyone I met told me I should be dead anyway from the marsh bug bite. Got very boring after a while.”
“I can imagine.” Kei sat on a stool. Romi pulled on his shirt again and sat down too. “I’ll give you a note to take to the academy. Master Pitis is the leading expert on toxins and he may be able to give you a more precise timetable. I’m sure he will want to know more about this insect for a start.”
“Ah—what you said about not returning to the academy...?”
“I’ve resigned,” Kei said briefly. “Pitis is a fine healer, and you can have every confidence in him.” He wrote something as he spoke—presumably his report. Without looking up, he said casually, “My nephew is really rather smitten, isn’t he?”
No point in denying it to a soul-toucher. “It’s mutual. But there are some real difficulties ahead—I don’t know how we’ll resolve them.”
“You mean the fact he lives here and you live there?” Romi nodded. “Ah, well. Bigger obstacles have been overcome, after all. I shouldn’t worry about it for now. But there’s something I do need to ask you about before we rejoin them. What happened in Visiqe?”
The tone was no longer casual, nor was Kei’s look. “How much do you know?”
“More than Arman. All he knows is what Lep Wepizi reported while telling us of your demise—that Karik had been attacked in Visiqe. It was your corporal Jou who, ah, indicated it might be...something more than the lep reported to us.”
Romi wished Jou had kept her mouth shut, but if she’d thought them all dead, then discretion would have been pointless. “Karik doesn’t want you to know.”
“I already do. What I don’t know is how he’s dealing with it—or who did it. Do you know?”
“We’re pretty sure it was Soza.”
Kei went white, clutching at his chest. Horrified, Romi went to support him, but was waved away. “I’m...I’m all right. Just get me some water—from there, please.” Romi hastily fetched a glassful from the pitcher standing on the side counter, and handed it to Kei, who sipped it. Gods, he had no idea the man was so delicate. “My fault,” he murmured, looking down at the glass.
“Your fault? The attack?”
“All of it,” he said grimly. “It was to please me that Karik decided on his present career though it caused his parents no end of pain. I sent Karik on this expedition and I persuaded Arman to keep Soza on the team, even though he told us plainly he shouldn’t be on it. I’m a fool, a dangerous fool, and I have no business being allowed to ruin people’s lives.”
Romi stared, shocked at the raw anger and self-hatred in this gentle man’s voice. “Karik doesn’t see it that way at all. You’re his hero.”
“Exactly. And I took that respect and admiration and nearly got him killed. That he wasn’t, was pure good luck, and I can take no credit for it. It wasn’t just him—it’s you, it’s Sibu and Reisa. Too many good people whose lives I’ve altered and hurt.”
Romi dared to put a hand on Kei’s shoulder, uncertain what to say, since he knew so little of this man except through Karik’s adoring eyes. “If you bear responsibility, then what of me? I was actually there. I saw Soza in action. I should have packed him home at the first indication of the risk he posed. We saw plenty of it.”
But Kei only shook his head. “No, Romi—you’re very kind, but you were just doing your job, following orders. The orders were mine and the responsibility is mine. I won’t place myself in the position again. No more bright young lives blighted by my idiocy.” He rubbed at his eyes, looking very tired, old and broken. He looked up, and smiled, though it was positively painful to see. “Now, I’m sure you want a meal and a bath, not to mention a comfortable bed. Ah—you and Karik...how is he coping?”
Romi was torn between wanting to preserve Karik’s privacy, and wanting this man’s skilled help. Finally he went for the help. “We’re taking it very slowly. He seems to be suffering a lot of flashbacks—I really don’t know what to do. We haven’t....” He coughed. “You know.”
“I understand. I think that’s probably right for you now. My advice is the same as for your heart. Take it slow and carefully, be honest with each other. And I’ll be there if he wants to talk—or you do. He’s a very brave young man, you know. He’s overcome a lot of bad things in his life.”
“He’s come a long way, and all on his own. But if he doesn’t get better, I might have to hunt Soza down and present Karik with his head on a pike.”
Kei winced. “I think that would be counter-productive, much as I understand your anger. Arman will want to pursue this judicially. I urge you to convince Karik this is necessary—we must stop this man hurting anyone else.”
“He understands that. But I can’t force him, and I certainly won’t allow you to try.”
“And I thought I was protective of him,” Kei said, shaking his head. “I’ll leave it for now, but one of us—either Arman or myself—will have to speak to him. I’m deferring to you because you and he need to work through this together, and I can tell how you feel about him. Don’t imagine for a moment I’ll allow you to hurt him.” Kei’s fierce tone suddenly and forcefully reminded Romi that this man was the lover of one of the most powerful people in Darshian, and while he might not make threats often, he most certainly did not do so lightly either.
“You don’t need to warn me, Master Kei. Karik has earned my devotion many times over, and I would cut my hand off before I allowed it to hurt him.”
“I’m no one’s master. Forgive me—I’m, uh, a little....”
Kei cleared his throat, and looked rather lost for a moment or two, as if he’d forgotten why he’d become so roused. “Why don’t you go and find them? I’ll be out soon. Pira and I found you both some spare clothes. I’m sure nothing fits, but needs must. We can get some things tailored for you, we know people who are very good at such things....” He was almost babbling, pushing Romi out of the room with his words, trying to hide his distress. The man needed nothing less than a hug and comforting, but Romi didn’t know him well enough to offer either.
Faced with Kei’s relentless, obscuring chatter, there wasn’t anything Romi could do but go back to the kitchen and find Karik. But that didn’t mean he wasn’t deeply worried—for Kei, for Karik, and what this meant for both of them. This was far worse than anything he or Karik had anticipated, and he was out of his depth.
But the bastards didn’t drown me before—they won’t manage this time. An answer had to exist.
~~~~~~~~
Romi only had to look at Arman as he returned to the kitchen, and the Ruler slipped out without a word to find his lover. Pira was still off somewhere, so Karik, looking depressed and worried, was left alone. Romi sat down beside him. “He told you?” Karik nodded. “What a pissing mess.”
“My Ma...gods, Romi—Kei and Ma are close as brother and sister yet she’s forbidden him to speak to her or Pa, or Kei’s family. I’d have thought she’d cut her heart out before she’d do something like that. Why is this happening?”
He turned his soulful eyes on Romi for an answer, but Romi had none to offer. “Grief, I guess. Guilt too, from what Kei said.”
Pira entered the kitchen then, carrying a small pile of drying cloths. “Oh, where’s his lordship now?”
“With Kei,” Karik said.
She shook her head. “Those two will be the end of me. If you’d not come back, lad, I fear we would have lost Kei and that would have meant losing the both of them.” Under the table, Karik’s hand tightened around Romi’s. “Still, now it’ll be mended, won’t it? So all I need to do is put some
meat on your bones. Don’t they feed people in Andon?”
“They do, but we had to feed ourselves most of the time.”
Romi watched Karik make the effort to appear bright and lively, trotting out stories to entertain Pira as she prepared their evening meal, making it seem as if they’d just been on a jolly adventure, with no hint of the real agonies and sorrows they’d experienced. Romi played along, and their play-acting cheered up Pira, at least. At least it did until Kei and Arman came in, hand in hand, faces drawn and sad, and then her mood dropped once again. She fluttered around Kei, asking if he wanted tea or a sweet cake, helplessly offering domestic comforts for a heart damaged almost too much to bear, and which no amount of cakes could heal.
The one thing that brought a genuine smile to Kei’s face was any sign of affection between him and Karik. He’d been expecting disapproval—at least from Arman, who surely must have realised the breach of regulations—but the Ruler didn’t seem to mind in the least, smiling benignly as Karik took Romi’s hand, or leaned towards him in a familiar way. But for the rest of it, he sat solemn-faced and clearly worried nearly to death about his lover.
The arrival of the food covered up for the many silences in the conversation, when Karik’s efforts to be cheerful failed, and Romi was unable to dredge up anything that wouldn’t remind their hosts of their pain. The food, at least, was no cause for sadness, and after Karik had almost inhaled a plateful in his enthusiasm, he sat back with a sigh. “Pira, I used to dream about your cakes, you know. And your roast fowl. You couldn’t have made a more perfect meal to welcome us home.”
“It’s nothing much—you didn’t give us much warning, young man.” But she smiled as she scolded him.
“It reminds me how much we need to improve communications with Andon—and across Darshian,” Arman said. “Everyone here is so complacent, relying on the mind-speakers, but what happens when you can’t?” Kei grimaced and looked down at the table. Arman, realising his gaffe, hastily took his lover’s hand, and kissed his forehead.
Staying Power (Darshian Tales #3) Page 55