Now there were only Mama, Papa, Grandmother, and myself left, since Papa had decided that we would stay behind. Grandma would never leave the Great House and would always be home in case any of her family decided to return.
24: Preparations for the Invasion
With the Russian troops departed and the Germans not yet there, we were all in some kind of “limbo”; everyone was wondering what was coming next. Soon we were receiving some very troublesome news from both sides. The news from the Russian side was devastating to all of us who had relatives on the last departing trains. It seemed that some of the last trains were blown up by the Russians themselves—killing all the people on them. Some of the last trains were loaded with prisoners from the Russian jails, but among those were many other civilians who were picked up by the Russian soldiers along the way. The Russians had to move fast, and they decided to blow up the trains rather than abandon them. The prisoners were of no concern to them, and the civilians had become victims of circumstance.
Since most of our relatives were on the last trains, we were hoping and praying that they were not among those who were killed. However, there was no way to know for sure, and we were absolutely devastated.
But there was news from the other side, which had become occupied by the Germans, and that news was disturbing as well. It seemed that the Germans were attacked over and over again by the Russian partisans who were scattered all around the wooded areas, and many German soldiers were killed by them. This created a lot of mistrust among the Germans—that they were not safe from any of the Russians, even those who were left behind. They started to kill anyone who looked suspicious, especially the young men and boys, but they also killed some women and old men. All of this meant one thing for us—that we had better stay hidden in our hiding places until at least the first German troops went through. The news was brought to us by some of those who had managed to escape and return to town. Needless to say, this news traveled fast throughout the town.
* * *
“NEWS FROM THE OTHER SIDE” • It is not clear what “sides” Nonna had in mind, though certainly she referred to German-occupied country.
* * *
Papa had already started to dig a tunnel from the basement of Grandmother’s house to the outside cellar. His plans were to put up a fake wall from the cellar and from the basement, thereby giving him a safe place to hide. Papa was concerned about Grandmother, Mama, and me, and was trying to think of some way to protect us from the things that were yet to come. He came up with the idea that we should leave and go to the next village, where we would be safer.
* * *
STAYING BEHIND • Feodosija refused to leave the Great House. She worried that there might be looters and that German soldiers might burn down the house. She also wanted to stay at the house in case any of her children came home. At that point, Feodosija had little idea where most of her children were—and if they were alive or dead.
Since it was more dangerous on the streets for Russian men than for women, Yevgeny planned to hide in an underground tunnel and send the other three into the next village to find food and shelter.
* * *
There was plenty of food in the next village that we could offer the German soldiers, to possibly establish some sort of communication between our people and the Germans. However, Grandmother did not want to leave her home for fear that it would be ransacked or burned. She decided to stay and prepare meals for Papa while he was hiding out in the tunnel.
So, in spite of Mama’s protests and tears, the decision was made for Mama to take me and go to the next village, which was at least eleven miles away. Papa promised to come for us in a short time—just long enough for the first front to go through.
“It will all work out for the best,” he would say.
Grandmother was going to stay in her house, not hide in the tunnel. She said, “The worst German soldier would not want to hurt an old woman like myself.”
Mama and I packed some clothes and a few other things we thought we might need in the next few days and loaded them onto a telega (cart), preparing for our trip. According to Papa, it would be safer for us to walk to the village in the late afternoon, or at least by dark, because he was worried about the Russian planes and what they might do if they saw us walking through the fields. It never even occurred to Papa about all those mines in the fields, but I am sure that after we left, he thought about them, too, and worried plenty. Mama thought of a way to make it through the fields by taking a sack full of large stones along with us. The idea was to roll some stones ahead of us and then follow the path where the stones had rolled. Mama would walk ahead of me, and I would follow. We were both amused by Mama’s ingenuity.
In the meantime at home, Papa and Grandmother were putting the finishing touches to the tunnel. The cellar outside was built deep underground with steps leading all the way down. It was built many years ago with the purpose of storing food such as potatoes, apples, lots of barrels with pickles, sauerkraut, etc. The cellar outside the house was much cooler than the basement of the house, and Grandmother also used the outside cellar to store her homemade wine. The shelves were loaded with aged wines of all kinds. Papa had built the tunnel between the cellar and basement and, therefore, had plenty of room to hide in this tunnel.
Now they would wait, and when the first Germans came, Papa would go into his hiding place. It should be only for a day or two. The worst that was expected from the German troops was that they would search the empty houses for food—they would not take any chances if there were people in the houses.
* * *
HOME INVASION • The German soldiers came through Russia unprepared for a long battle. They, too, faced starvation, and they ransacked houses searching for something to eat. They killed anyone who got in their way. Papa had been too optimistic when he thought he might reason with the young German soldiers, even though he spoke the German language.
* * *
Mama and I were making our journey through the fields, and Mama’s idea of rolling the stones ahead of us was working out very well. However, it was getting dark outside, and it was hard to see where the stones were rolling. It was also very time consuming, and it began to look like we would be walking all night long. We were both very tired and hungry but did not dare to stop and rest. We tried to stay in the middle of the fields and not get too close to the wooded area for fear that there were partisans in the woods who could make us join them. We told riddles and sang songs quietly as we were walking, which made us both feel better and kept us from getting too sleepy. It must have been close to midnight when we finally reached the village. We stopped at the first farmhouse and asked the people if we could spend the night there.
The farmer and his wife were very compassionate to us after Mama told them our story. Their house was full of people, and there were several small children scattered all around on blankets on the floor of the room we had entered. Mama asked the farmer if we could stay in his barn and use some straw for our bed, and he was only too happy to accommodate Mama’s request. The barn was very large, there was plenty of straw, and the barn was quite warm, too. The woman of the house had brought us some fresh-baked bread and some milk, which made us feel very welcome. It had been a long time since I had such good-tasting bread, and I ate most of it myself, leaving Mama with the milk.
As we lay there on the straw, looking out of the barn opening, we could see how brightly the moon was shining. We did not have such a bright moon to accompany us as we were walking just a few hours earlier. For just a few short minutes, we forgot all about the war and the killings that were happening all around us, and we were asleep in no time at all.
* * *
THE SERENKOVS • Nonna never forgot the farmer’s family and kept a photograph of a couple whom she identified as the Serenkovs with her throughout the war. The photograph has also survived.
* * *
25: Our World Begins to Crumble
Fall 1941
When Mama
and I woke up, it was daylight, and we heard the farmer’s wife coming down to the barn. She greeted us and asked us if we had rested well, and indeed Mama and I had gotten a good night’s sleep. However, when we opened our eyes, the first thing to enter our minds was Papa and Grandmother, whom we had left behind. The farmer’s wife invited us to come to the house and have breakfast with the family. She had pancakes with sour cream and had homemade preserves. This was a meal fit for a king, and Mama and I both enjoyed the breakfast. After we had finished eating, Mama was asking her if there was a place where we could stay for a couple of days or until Papa would come for us. The lady pointed to a few houses in the village and assured Mama that there were many empty houses around that were left unattended when the Russians evacuated the people. Those being evacuated had just taken a few clothes and small things that they could take with them. The lady told Mama that she could look around and find a place to stay for a few days in one of those houses.
Mama and I went looking for someplace that we thought would be safe and yet not be too far away from other people. We looked at several houses that day, and selected this farmhouse where there were some livestock that had been left unattended. Even having animals around gave us a little sense of not being alone, and we could feed the livestock while we were there. The house that we selected was a typical farmhouse that had a nice little kitchen, bedrooms, and a parlor with a big fireplace. The amazing thing was how clean and neat the owners had left everything when they evacuated. The beds had sheets and pillows, and to look at the place, one would think that the owners could return at any time. Mama and I went back to the farmer’s house where we had spent the night and told the family that we were going to stay at the place we had found. Both the farmer and his wife told us that if we needed anything to come tell them and they would help us in any way they could.
Food was no problem, because there were potatoes and carrots still in the ground in the fields, and all one had to do was go out and gather what was needed. However, by this time, there were German soldiers marching through the area, and Mama and I decided that we would stay close to the house and act as if it were our home. The main problem was that there was no bread, and by that time no mills were operating to provide the flour that was needed to make bread. However, Mama invented a way to grind the wheat when she found two tin buckets where one fit inside the other. She took a nail, and drove nail holes into the outer bucket which would leave sharp “teeth” inside the bucket’s bottom. She drove as many nail holes as she could in the bottom of the bucket, and then drove nail holes from the inside of the other bucket, which would leave the nail holes pointing out. These nail holes in effect left sharp teeth that would sit pointing toward the teeth of the other bucket—thus creating a kind of grinder to use on the grain.
There was no shortage of wheat, but the grain bins had been dynamited by the Russians when they evacuated. The wheat was full of glass and debris from the dynamiting, so we had to figure out a way to separate the grains of wheat from the glass and debris. There was only one way, and that was to sit at the table and sort the wheat from the glass and debris—one grain at a time. This was tedious work, and very time consuming, but it kept our mind occupied and helped to pass the time. When we would get enough wheat kernels sorted, we would put them into the outer bucket. Mama had rigged up a handle on the inner bucket so we could turn it. The teeth she had created by driving the nail holes in the bucket would slowly grind the wheat into a coarse type of meal. Mama would then boil the wheat meal and make a type of porridge, but we had to cook it several hours before it would be tender enough to eat.
We would spend several hours each day cleaning the wheat to make a substitute for bread, and we would go out and gather firewood to use in the stove. When we needed potatoes, we would ask the farmer if we could dig enough for that day. People were kind and willing to help each other in any way that they could. They would share whatever they had because of the uncertain times—everyone was unsure as to what tomorrow would bring.
The first few days seemed to pass rather quickly as we established a pattern and oriented ourselves to the surroundings. Mama looked worried and unhappy, but she tried to hide her concerns from me by singing songs and trying to keep busy doing something—anything to stay busy. When we felt it was safe, we would walk to the farmer’s house, and Mama and the lady would talk about the war and how scared everyone was. Mama would mention Papa and hoped that he would be safe until we returned.
There were a lot of German soldiers around the village and on the roads. They did not bother us but would give us curious looks when they would see us. After a few more days, the concerns about the soldiers subsided, but Mama and I kept as far away from them as possible. The weather was beginning to turn cold, but we were able to stay warm enough and spent more and more time inside the house. With each passing day, Mama’s concern grew stronger because we had not heard from Papa. Mama told me that there were too many soldiers in the area for Papa to be outside, and she was worried about him being in hiding in the tunnel with the weather becoming so much colder. It seemed that we had been there for a long time, but it was only about two weeks since we had left Papa and Grandmother in Konstantinowka at the Great House. We were both sad and missing our family.
26: Papa Is Found in Hiding
One day a man from Grandmother’s neighborhood came looking for Mama and told her that she needed to go back home because her husband had been hurt very badly. He didn’t tell Mama how he was hurt or how badly but told her that she should go immediately because my grandmother needed her. Mama was really concerned and told me that she must go and check on things at home. She told me that I could stay with the farmer and his family. With that, she took me to the farmer’s house and asked the lady if I could stay with her while she went to check on things at home. The lady quickly agreed and asked Mama if she needed any help. Mama told her no and left immediately. I was scared and felt very lonely and uncomfortable being left alone with strangers. The children seemed so different from me, and they would look at me in funny ways. I didn’t sleep that night, but rather lay there crying and wondering what was going on with Papa and Grandmother.
The next day, Mama and Grandmother came back pulling a telega, with Papa inside the telega all covered with blankets. When I ran out to see him, I was horrified at what I saw. Papa was lying there with both eyes missing, and his head was so swollen that I hardly recognized him. The farmer’s wife was telling my mother to bring Papa into their house and for us to stay there, and she would help us with Papa. Mama agreed to accept her offer, and we took Papa inside the house where the lady prepared a bed for him. However, Papa was conscious, and he called me over to his bed. Even though he could not see me, he told me not to worry, that he was going to be all right now that he had Mama and me with him. I knew he must have been in awful pain. But he tried not to show how much pain he was having.
The next few days were just a blur for me. I didn’t want to leave Papa’s side, and my little heart was broken.
* * *
NONNA AND PAPA • Nonna deeply loved her father. She described Yevgeny as “very strict in teaching me the values that only a father who deeply loves his child would be so intent on teaching.” She remembered “some small surprises” Yevgeny hid in his pockets for Nonna whenever he came home from a trip. By age four, Nonna had learned Polish and German from her father. “I knew my ABCs in three languages, and I could scribble many words in those languages.”
* * *
Mama and the lady would put cold cloths on Papa’s head and sponged him down to try to make him more comfortable. He seemed to perk up a little bit and was able to sit in a chair by the kitchen table for a while each day. Everyone was concerned that the German soldiers might come in and find Papa there—and finish killing him. So when we heard the soldiers or they would come close to the house, we would hide Papa in a closet until they moved on.
Grandmother told us how she had found Papa in the cellar, beaten and bleed
ing, when she had taken him some food to eat. When Grandmother found Papa, the drunken German soldiers had already left and probably thought Papa was dead—not that they cared. Papa was able to tell us that he had caught a cold while he was hiding in the tunnel because it was cold and damp and there was no heat. Papa had heard the German soldiers in the cellar eating and drinking Grandmother’s wine. The soldiers had been in the cellar for quite a while—long enough to get drunk—and they were cursing and singing and making a lot of noise. Papa had stayed quietly in the tunnel. He was safe until he had to cough. The German soldiers heard him cough and began to look for him and found him hiding in the tunnel. Papa told us that he had tried to reason with them, but they savagely beat him and left him for dead.
* * *
PAPA’S CONDITION • It is not clear why Yevgeny needed to go into hiding, nor why he was beaten once discovered. Perhaps a Soviet man in hiding was simply suspect.
* * *
Grandmother decided to return home, since she was not able to be of help here, and the house was crowded anyway. She decided that she would go back to the Great House to try to protect what little she had left and also to keep the looters away.
The Secret Holocaust Diaries Page 11