Once a Gypsy

by Danica Winters

  The kids dipped their arms into the brook. She tore some of the branches from the gooseberry bush and stripped the bark. Dipping her hands into the water, Helena lifted out a handful of the black mud. It stuck to her fingers as she folded the strips of bark in. She kept mixing the concoction until it was the consistency of pudding.

  “Gras, come here. Let me see your burns.”

  They lifted their chilled arms. Rionna’s shirt was singed at the edge of her sleeves. Helena took the mixture and gently dabbed it onto Rionna’s hot flesh, careful to barely touch her blisters. Amazingly, the girl didn’t budge.

  “What happened, Rionna?” Helena asked, trying to take her sister’s focus off the pain.

  Rionna shook her head and looked over at the stream, unable to speak. Helena patted the last bit of Rionna’s arm then pulled her into her embrace. Rionna stuck her arms out, unable to hug her back, but Helena didn’t care. “I love you, sweet gra. I love you.”

  Rionna pulled away. “You shoulda been here.”

  “I know. I’m sorry. I should’ve been there to stop Mam. I should have stood up against her. I knew somethin’ like this would happen. I knew it and I hadn’t stopped it. I wish I coulda seen it—maybe I could have used the forshaw…”

  She stopped.

  What had she said?

  Hopefully Rionna hadn't understood what she meant, or thought it was only a slip of the tongue.

  Rionna’s mouth opened and closed. “What?”

  “Nothing.” Helena turned to Gavin and started to apply the salve to her brother’s hands. “I just wish Mam hadn’t done what she did.”

  “Don’t lie to me.” Rionna eyed her suspiciously. “I’m not a child, Helena.”

  Helena let go of Gavin’s hands. “Don’t play with the mud, gra.” She stood up and wiped off the dirt from her knees.

  “You can just tell me if ye got the forshaw,” Rionna continued. “It would make sense. I mean, ya always get everything. It would be only normal if you got the gift too.”

  Rionna’s words bit at her. “It’s not as great as you’re makin’ it sound.”

  “Oh really? The woman I met with the gift could heal. She could read palms. She could make money. People loved her.”

  “It can be a gift, but—”

  “It’s fine. Knowing you, you’re probably lying. If you really had the gift, you’d use it to heal me and Gavin, but no… All you ever care about is your bloody self.”

  “Come with me.” Helena walked over to the pine tree and put her hands to its gnarled surface as she tried to control her anger. Every choice she had made had been made with them in mind, but her resentful sister couldn’t possibly understand those sacrifices.

  She closed her eyes and let the magic within her be her guide.

  She was the tree, her roots planted deep in Mother Earth’s bosom. Her body tingled with the power that radiated up from the earth below her.

  I am like this tree; firm in my beliefs, strong in my intention, unwavering in my path.

  Gavin and Rionna stopped beside her as she repeated the silent prayer.

  A wave of calming energy rose within her, and suddenly it was if she held all the power of the earth within her hands. Helena opened her eyes and turned to Gavin. She took his arms and traced her finger over his wounds. The energy flowed through her, invisibly passing from her fingers into his marred flesh. The mud dried instantly.

  “What?” The little boy’s astonished voice bounced between the trees.

  The heat of his burn circulated over her arms, as if the injury were upon her own flesh. She grimaced and let the pain fill her senses. Using her power, she surrounded the pain in her arms and hands and tried to force it to collapse. Wisps of pain tried to force their way through the tendrils of her energy, but she held them back. The orb shrank smaller and smaller the harder she pressed.

  The pain abated in her arms.

  Helena opened her eyes. The mud on Gavin’s arms dropped to the ground in chunks. The burns had disappeared without so much as a pink dimple where the heat had defiled his flesh.

  She turned to Rionna and extended her hands. The power pulsed inside of her, and she didn’t dare speak for fear that it would diminish her strength.

  Rionna reached over, and Helena took her hands. She closed her eyes. The heat of the burns drew a whimper from her lips, but just like with Gavin, Helena didn’t allow the pain to control her. She collected all her sister’s pain. She imagined the power of her own body dousing the burn with healing energy. As she tried to manipulate her power, there was a sensation of cool water running down her arms.

  Rionna gasped.

  After a moment, there was no more pain. She released Rionna’s hands.

  Rionna’s mouth was agape as she stared at the fresh skin on her arms. “You do. You really have the gift.”

  Helena put her hands to the tree and grounded the last bit of energy, silently thanking Mother Earth for the gift from which they had all benefited. “Now that you know the truth, I need to know I can trust you. You can’t tell anyone what I’ve just done. Do you understand?”

  “What else can you do?” Rionna asked.

  “I don’t know, but I know I can heal, and see things others don’t.”

  “Why do you have the gift and I don’t?”

  “I don’t know. I don’t want this…”

  Rionna pushed her arms over her chest. “You have everything. Da loves you the best, you got your schooling almost done, and now ya got a gift that everyone would love. Why don’t I get nothin’?” Rionna spun on her heel and rushed out of the trees, leaving them behind.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  “Rionna?” Helena called. Gavin hugged her legs.

  She needed the chance to explain herself. Helena didn’t have it easy. Maybe it appeared that way to Rionna, but her assumption couldn’t have been further from the truth.

  The branches drew back, and Graham stepped into the opening.

  “Graham?” she said with a shocked breath. “What’re ya doin’ here? I thought I told ya to stay at the festival. We can’t…”

  “I couldn’t stay away. I had to come. Are you okay?” He motioned to Gavin. “Are the kids okay? They didn’t get hurt, did they?”

  “Are you by yourself?” Everyone who stood around the fire must have noticed him coming back here to see them. “Where’s Brian?”

  “I think he’s out there talking to his father.”

  She stepped through the mess of trees. The branches pulled at her body like needy fingers. Helena reached for one of the sticks poking at her. The bark was rough in her hands as she snapped the twig in half.

  The mass of people that had filled the campsite had started to disperse, and her betrothed was talking animatedly to Da while his father, beside him, took a pull from a pint. She moved deeper into the trees, until she was back by the calm little stream. Graham shushed Gavin as Helena drew near.

  Gavin looped his arms around her leg and popped his dirty thumb into his mouth.

  “Everything okay? How’s your mother?” Graham asked. “I heard they took her to the hospital.”

  “She’ll be fine. Some burns, but she’ll make it through. She’s tough.”

  Helena glanced down at Gavin’s chubby little hands, which had, only minutes ago, been covered in angry red burns.

  Gavin loosened his hold on Helena’s leg. She leaned down so she could look him in the eyes. “Gav, would you check on Da? Make sure he’s okay, aye?”

  The boy nodded and ran off through the thicket, glancing back only briefly before leaving them alone.

  Graham stepped nearer to her, close enough that she could make out the sweet smell of his skin. She resisted the urge to pull his intoxicating scent deeper into her lungs.

  “Are you going to be okay?” He pushed a lock of hair behind her ear.

  “What?” She tried to focus on something other than his luscious pink lips and the place where his fingertips had brushed against her skin.

&
nbsp; “Where are you going to stay tonight?” His breath whispered across her skin, awaking a deep need within her.

  “I… I don’t know.” She hadn’t thought that far ahead—there had been so much going on. The children couldn’t be without a home, but Da had to pay the O’Donoghues the money that was owed before they could buy another trailer. Their debt left them with nothing.

  Graham took her hand in his warm grip. “If you ever need anything, I’m here.”

  He pulled her hand up and brushed his lips against the backs of her fingers. The heat of his skin made her draw closer to him, and his other arm wrapped tightly around her waist. “I want this hand. I want you, forever.”

  “I… I can’t. I got to marry Brian—more now than ever. He and his family control our future.” She halfheartedly tried to move out of his grasp, but he would let her go nowhere.

  “No. You don’t. You don’t have to marry that rat bastard.” There was a sparkle in his luxurious brown eyes. “I can help…”

  “I appreciate that, but there’s a price for everything in this life.”

  “I want you to walk away from Brian.”

  “And ya mean my life as a Traveller…” Helena stared at him. “Have ya thought of what’ll happen to me if I take up with ya?”

  “I thought we could finally move past our differences. You and I are more than what our cultures have labeled us. We’re both people. We share the same feelings, and I think we share the same mind.” Graham placed her hand on his chest. “I told you before that I love you. I want you to know that I meant it. I love you, Helena. I’d love you whether or not you were ever able to help Danny. I’d love you even if you chose to stay with your family and Brian. My love for you isn’t going to go away.”

  “If you mean what you say…” She paused. “If you love me… Prove it.”

  Graham smiled, the dimple on his cheek making Helena’s chest ache with the love she carried for him. “I think that’s a grand idea.” He pulled her closer and took her lips in his.

  She swam like a lover lost in the sea of his kiss. She held nothing back and let their passion take control, as if it were the only thing keeping her afloat. She pulled her hand free of his fingers and trailed it down his chest. He drove his kiss harder against her lips, matching her fury. His body rubbed against hers—only making the need within her grow more desperate.

  The pressure of his kiss lightened, and he drew back. “I want you to be mine.”

  She wanted him too—but she didn’t want to leave her life behind. Not now. Not when her family needed her so much.

  Graham lifted her chin with his hand and slowly slid his lips down the tender skin of her neck. She couldn’t hold back her quiet moan. Graham jerked at the sound, then pulled her even tighter against his responding body. She forced herself to move away from him, her cheeks aflame.

  “I…” She tried to speak.

  His lips stopped their descent. “Hmm?” His eyes were glazed over with lust.

  “I have to go.”

  He leaned back and nodded resignedly.

  She moved in and stole another kiss. His hungry lips searched hers with unrestrained passion. Her chest pressed against his as his lips melted into hers. She clung to his shirt and could feel his pulse through the thin fabric. Her heart beat in time with his, as if they were connected, one being, one need, and one shared craving for the other’s touch.

  His hands moved up and down her back as their kiss slowed. A strange urge rose within her as his touch warmed her chilled skin. She pushed her body against his and felt the hardness that he had revealed to her in her vision.

  No. They couldn’t do this—not here, not now.

  “I…” Her voice came out in a squeak. “I need to get back. They’re going to start wonderin’ where I am.” She wiggled out of his arms, hating the cold dampness that soon overcame the residual warmth of his touch.

  “I want you.” He reached out for her, and she let him touch the slight curve of her waist.

  She wanted him too, but other things needed tending. There was so much up in the air. The only fact she knew with any certainty was that she loved him but was promised to another man.

  “I need to figure out my life before I can think about this.” She motioned between them. “I need to find us a place—Gavin and Rionna can’t be without a home. My da’s da, he might be able to take us in. They’re camped up near the North Coast.”

  Pain filled his eyes.

  She couldn’t stand to look at him. “We are at the mercy of others, and my da won’t be on the dole any more than we already are—the O’Donoghues are asking for more than what is owed. And what’ll my family do to settle the debt if I walk away from the engagement?”

  Graham dropped his hand from her side. “The vicar has a little place where your family can stay until you get back on your feet.”

  Helena paused. She had expected Graham to offer them a place at the manor, which she would have needed to refuse. But this suggestion was different. They had tithed to the church for years. It wouldn’t be like being on the dole.

  “I’ll talk to Da.”

  “Grand. I’ll tell the vicar to expect you and your family. And, if you want, you and your da can come back to your jobs. This way you can save up your money and pay the O’Donoghues whatever they’re asking.”

  Helena smiled at the thought. She could get back to her life, but Brian would never go for this. He wouldn’t let them break their agreement.

  “The O’Donoghues won’t be happy. This is about money—this marriage is business to them.”

  “If you let me, Helena, I could help. My family has money. We could pay them off—anything to make them leave you and your family alone.”

  “If I allow you to pay, we would only be shifting our debt about. It’s not right, Graham.”

  “I want to help, Helena.”

  “I know, but this is something I think I’m gonna need to take care of on my own.” Helena thought back to her job in the kitchens. She missed her freedom and the life she had started to create for herself. “Does Mary know what happened? Did she notice I was gone?”

  Graham shook his head. “She didn’t mention it, and I didn’t tell her that you’d quit. I think she assumed you were still working with me.”

  “Aye, good.” She hated to think of the look of disappointment on Mary’s face. “Da and I’ll be to work Monday morning. Six o’clock sharp.”

  Graham stole one last kiss before she moved toward the trees. “I can’t wait to see you again. And if you need anything… money… anything… to help break your engagement, I’m here.”

  “I know. Thank ye, Graham.” She took off through the trees and into the campsite, where hungry flames still licked at the carcass of her former life.

  Brian stood by the fire. The sweat on his face reflected the orange glow of the greedy flames. Standing at his side was Rionna. Her sister glanced over at her, drew her arms over her chest, and lifted her nose up in the air like she was an angry French poodle.

  Helena glanced over at Da. His black eye had started to fade to a sick yellow, and there was soot smeared over his forehead. The black ash had sunk into his wrinkles, giving him a fearful look.

  She made her way through the last of the crowd toward Brian, his father, Da, and Rionna. “Brian, do ya think we can have a talk… alone?”

  His father threw his head back and laughed, making the pint in his hand shake violently. “You can’t be getting him alone just yet, lass. I know he’s a strappin’ lad, but those types o’ things’ll have to wait ’til after your wedding.”

  She coughed lightly. “That’s actually what I want to be talking about. I don’t think I can go through with this.”

  “Whatcha mean by this?” Brian’s father’s voice dropped its playful edge.

  Da looked up at her with a worried expression on his soot-covered face.

  “Brian, I appreciate what you’re trying to do for our family. I do. But I can’t marry you.” She rea
ched for him, but he recoiled. “I don’t think we’d make each other happy. I don’t love you.”

  His cheeks flushed with anger and embarrassment. “You daft woman—”

  “You got this all wrong, girl. You don’t have a choice.” Brian’s father interrupted with a wave of his hand. “You and your fam have a debt.”

  “I’ll pay you what we owe.”

  His father lunged at her like he wanted to strike her down.

  Rionna stepped between them. “I’ll take her place. I’ll quit school and marry Brian. I mean, I’d be proud to marry him.” She smiled at him.

  Everything Helena had ever done was to protect her family, and Rionna was doing the one thing Helena feared most. Rionna was giving away her chance to follow her passion, to learn what was really out in the world—all for some good-for-nothing boy who wanted nothing more than to please his father.

  “No.” Helena reached out for her sister. “You can’t.”

  “I can do whatever I want.” Rionna gave her a sharp glare. “I’m my own woman. You have no right to tell me what to do.”

  Helena moved to speak, but Brian’s father cut her off.

  “Are these acceptable terms, lad?” he asked.

  Brian leaned back and gazed down at Rionna’s backside, then motioned for her to turn. Rionna obliged with a smile.

  “Aye,” Brian said with a nod. “I’ll take the younger one. I think I’m getting the far better end of the deal.”

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  The morning sun spread its fingers over the granite headstones that lined the grass as Helena peered out the front window. Death and decay seemed to follow her wherever she went. Goose bumps rose on her arms as a faint draft moved through the vicar’s guest cottage. Helena turned away from the window and glanced down the hallway toward the closed bedroom doors, where Da and Gavin were still fast asleep.

  After their fight Rionna had gone to the hospital with Mam, and refused to consider coming to the house or being within twenty meters of Helena. Helena didn’t mind her sister’s absence, not after the blade Rionna had plunged into her soul.