“Would you like me to drive you home?” He asked concerned.
“Sure, that’d be great.” I smiled genuinely this time knowing I’d be away from this nightmare. We stood up and headed for the exit. I caught Julie’s attention and waved goodbye. She smiled seeing Jaxon right behind me and gave me the thumbs up signal. I rolled my eyes and shook my head and walked out the door.
The drive to my house was filled with awkward silence. Jaxon drove down the main road, flipping through the stations before stopping at some classic rock station. The volume was low, but I couldn’t think of anything to say. Jaxon would glance my way and I’d smile. His deep dimples would reply but I could tell he was struggling with something.
He pulled into the driveway and jumped out to open my door. That was something I wasn’t expecting. He stood between the door and me holding out his left hand to help me out of the car. I hesitated a moment trying to figure out where this was leading, but Jaxon grabbed my hand and pulled me toward him. He held my hand as he shut the door behind me and leaned in, pressing me against his car. “I will regret it for the rest of my life if I don’t at least try to see if there’s anything between us.” He leaned in toward me and cupped his hand under my chin.
“Jaxon, I don’t think…” He softly brushed his thumb over my lips.
“Shh, don’t think.” His lips gently pressed against mine. It was a sweet, tender kiss, but no sparks. He pulled away slowly before removing his hand from my cheek. “Guess I lost my touch?” He smiled with those heart breaking dimples. Jaxon laughed nervously as he ran his hand through his hair.
“Jaxon, I’m sorry. That was…nice?” I internally rolled my eyes. What was I saying? “I don’t want our friendship to end over this. I just don’t feel that way about you. You’re a great guy and everything. I’m extremely flattered. You’re one of the hottest guys I know, but…”
“Yeah, I know. Brotherly love.” He stepped away shoving his hands in his pockets, kicking imaginary rocks in the driveway. “God, Reagan, it’s not supposed to hurt this bad. I knew you probably wouldn’t feel the same, but I was hoping for a little more than this.” He started walking around to the driver’s side of his car and I followed, unsure what to say or do to make him hurt less.
I placed my hand on his shoulder and turned him toward me. I reached my arms around him and hugged him tightly. “Jaxon, no matter what you think, I do love you and care about you. I’m just not ready for that kind of relationship yet. There are too many emotions right now I’m dealing with. I could really use your friendship.” My tears dampened his shirt as he pulled me in tighter to him. He placed another kiss on my head.
Jaxon cleared his throat. “I can do that. I can be your friend, but understand that I won’t give up on you. I have a feeling you’ll come around to my charms.” He chuckled and pulled out of our embrace. He ran his hands down my arms, grabbing my hands before bringing them to his lips. He kissed each hand then kissed my cheek. “I’ll give you a call tomorrow.”
After Jaxon got in his car, I waited and watched him drive away before heading across the street to the beach and toward the Rock. I’d missed my opportunity the other night to look into this music mystery. I also needed some air. Being in that building with two gorgeous guys spewing testosterone around me left me claustrophobic. I felt this overwhelming attraction to Kyler, but he seemed indifferent at times. I can’t figure him out. Then there’s Jaxon. I knew how much he liked me, now, but after the feelings I have for Kyler, I can’t imagine settling for his affection. A year ago, yes, definitely, Jaxon would have been a first choice boyfriend. But right now, it was just too confusing.
I had taken my sandals off and held them in my hand as I walked down the beach. The satin sand between my toes was cool this time of night. It had to be after midnight by now. The ocean waves were crashing and beckoning me to join them. I smiled at the invitation and walked to the water’s edge. The cool water covered my feet and ankles. The sand beneath them washed away with the waves as my feet sank deeper with each crash. I loved this feeling. It felt like a warm blanket surrounding me. I inhaled the salty air and closed my eyes letting the stress of this evening go out with the current. After a few deep breaths, I released my feet from the sand’s grip and continued toward the rock. I was listening for the music, but still hadn’t heard it even as I approached the Rock. I dropped my shoes at the back of the Rock and sat down in the core of my refuge. My sturdy sanctuary always had time to hold me close. Its arms were unwavering for my exhausted body. It never demanded conversation or asked for life altering decisions. It just was. The rock was cool and smooth and drained the pain from my sunburn. I sat there for a while just listening to the waves, straining to hear that familiar sound of music, but it never came. Frustrated, I stood up from the rock and began unbuttoning my shorts and pulled off my top. I was going in. I left my other clothes in place and started walking into the water. The waves crashed against my body and sent ripples of adrenaline through me. The water gave me energy. I wasn’t tired anymore and I wanted to swim. I dove into the next wave forgetting about my sunburn. But the waves caressed my skin and the sting I expected never came.
I swam out until I couldn’t touch. I let the waves hold my body as I stretched out to float. The sky was clear and full of twinkling stars. I floated in the gentle waves picking out constellations I knew and connecting the stars to form new ones I imagined. I tried to write my name in the stars. R-A-E-G-A-N, I traced with my finger in the air. M-A-S, I waved my hand in the air to erase the beginning of my last name. S-T-O-N-E, I giggled like a thirteen year old. I erased it all again with my hand. I felt silly. I wondered where he ran off to tonight. I wondered if he even thought about me in any way. I closed my eyes recalling his lips so close to me and the fireworks that erupted in my body as he whispered. I couldn’t stand to see you so uncomfortable in his arms. My stomach flipped. Did he know how comfortable I was in HIS arms? I sighed. Probably not. It wasn’t a good idea to fall for someone like him. Mysterious, heartbreakingly gorgeous, probably involved with someone exotic, definitely not interested in me. I wished I didn’t feel so idiotic around him. My body reacts in embarrassing ways it never has to anyone else. Maybe it’s a side effect from all of the drugs I’ve had to take? That’s got to be it.
I turned over to start swimming back to the shore when I noticed someone standing on the shore near the Rock. I froze and stared waiting for the stranger to leave, hoping they wouldn’t notice my clothes and shoes near the base of the rock. No such luck. The large shape on the shore reached down to pick up my shirt, and then looked out on the water searching for the owner.
“Anyone out there?” a familiar trembling rushed through me.
Not him. I panicked.
“Do you need help?” He shouted in my direction.
“Um, no thanks. I’m good.” I shouted back.
He returned my shirt to the ground and placed his hands on his hips. “Why don’t you come to shore?”
“Uh, maybe in a while.” I responded even though my instinct was to swim straight to him.
“You probably shouldn’t be out so far. The rip tide gets stronger at night.” Concern laced his comments, but I could tell he was enjoying the situation. “You sure you don’t need me to come in after you? I am a certified life guard.”
Of course he was. Maybe I should fake a cramp right now so he would come after me.
“No, I’m okay.” I replied. “I’ll come in a little closer, but there isn’t any need for you to rescue me.” I swam a little closer until I was able to touch but keep the rest of my body under the waves.
“Raegan?” He chuckled and sent tremors through my body. “I had no idea you were an exhibitionist.” He crossed his arms and stared in my direction. His smile I could see clearly in the moonlight.
“Not exactly an exhibitionist.” I blushed, thankful he couldn’t see that. “Just trying to relax a bit.”
“Well that does look relaxing. Maybe I will join you.” He pul
led off his shirt and started to unbutton his jeans. I had already seen him in nothing but swim trunks, but the sight of his well defined musculature took my breath away, again.
“Stop, please.” I turned around, heart pounding in my ears. What was I saying? I really was delusional. Here he was stripping down to join me in a skinny dipping excursion.
He laughed again. “Don’t want my company?” He teased. I turned slowly to find his jeans still on, but his shirt on the ground next to mine. I gasped. His body was exquisite. His low sitting jeans rested against his washboard stomach. “Raegan? Are you okay?” His teasing turned serious. I was gasping for air. He started walking into the water toward me. The music I’d heard the other night started up too. I was frozen in the water unsure of what to do. Could he hear it?
“Really, I’m okay.” I managed to say to stop him from moving closer. The music didn’t stop, I still heard it. It was beautiful and so close. Kyler started talking again, but I hushed him. “Can you hear that?” I asked him.
“Hear what?” He asked looking up and down the beach.
“Music.” I stated, knowing I sounded crazy.
He froze and stared at me. He started backing out of the water. “Raegan, please come to shore. I’ll turn around while you get dressed.” Distress filled his words. He waited by the shore until I started moving toward him.
“Turn around.” I ordered him. He backed out of the water and a few steps away from my clothes. When I started moving toward the shore, the music faded away. I was frustrated. When the water was about waist deep, he finally turned around so I could gather my clothes and get dressed. I picked up his shirt after I was fully dressed and told him that he could turn around now. I tossed his shirt to him and admired his body as he pulled the shirt over his sculptured muscles. I wiped at my face, knowing Julie’s make up had to be ruined. Hopefully it was waterproof mascara, or I’d look like a drowned raccoon for sure. He paused, as if on purpose to let me gawk at his perfection before hiding his magnificent body from my sight.
Guys my age just weren’t made like that. I couldn’t believe he was my age. I just shook my head in disbelief. “So, what are you doing, stalking me?” I teased trying to avoid the awkward tension.
“Ha, you wish.” He smirked. I was glad he really didn’t know how much I did wish that. He cleared his throat. “Why are you skinny dipping in the ocean so late at night, by yourself? Where’s Army boy?” He flashed a brilliant smile and his eyebrows waggled causing my heart to stop.
I just stared trying to collect my thoughts. “Jaxon just drove me home. He wasn’t invited to join me, if it’s any of your business.” I plopped myself down in the sand and started digging my heels in the moist sand. I tried to focus on the crashing waves and where the music might have been coming from instead of being hyper aware of his presence. That static electric sensation got stronger as he approached me and sat down too.
“Not invited? Huh. I figured you two were…” he raised an eyebrow not finishing his sentence.
“No, nothing but friends.” I emphasized. What was it with everyone trying to force me on Jaxon? “He’s always been like a brother to me, until tonight. That really threw me into the deep end.” I shook my head in disbelief staring at the sand.
He laughed and the tingles became violent vibrations in my bones. I closed my eyes and relished the pleasing feelings he gave me. “Yeah, I don’t think he feels like you’re his sister, unless there’s something messed up in his head. That still doesn’t answer my question about you being out here alone.” I turned my head to face him. His smile faltered slightly and his eyes narrowed waiting for my answer.
I shrugged my shoulders and smiled. “I like being alone…to think.” I quickly added as a new expression overtook his face. I didn’t want him to leave. “I haven’t been in the water since…well a while. It makes me feel alive somehow and I’m able to work out my problems.” I paused looking away from his face. “The skinny dipping part was just so I didn’t have to walk home dripping wet.” Heat filled my body as I confessed to the angel sitting next to me. I reclined back and lay down in the sand averting my eyes to the stars above and folding my hands on my stomach.
“Would you like me to leave you alone?” He asked with a touch of sadness in his voice.
“No!” My voice betrayed me hitting an unusual high pitch. “I mean, I don’t mind company, now that I’m dressed.” I smiled my best flirtatious smile at him, hoping he’d still want to talk with me.
“What would you like to talk about?” He asked, joining me in my horizontal position on the sand. He folded his arms behind his head. I could smell a hint of spicy cologne from him. “Are we contemplating the cosmos? Counting stars?” He kept his gaze toward the heavens, but his nearness was drawing me to him. I wanted to reach over and touch him to see if that electric sensation was really coming from him, to see if that spark we had earlier was real.
“Oh, I don’t know much about the stars or the cosmos for that matter.” I managed to say. “I know that’s the Big Dipper.” I pointed with my left hand. “And that’s the North Star.” He grabbed my hand and covered it with his, pointing his finger along mine. The electricity rushed through my body and I gasped.
He pulled my arm toward him. “And that’s Princess Andromeda and Queen Cassiopeia.” My breathing was so fast and loud, I knew he could hear it. He slowly released my hand and turned to face me. The look on my face must have been horrible because his smile faded quickly. “I should go.” He jumped up and stared toward the lighthouse. “Do you need a ride home?” I sat up confused and looked up at him.
“No, I walked. I’m not ready to go home yet.” I looked away from him dejectedly and back out to the waves.
“You’re not going back out there.” He stated it as a fact, not a question. Tension filled his voice. “How long do you plan on sitting here?” He squatted next to me, his arms resting on his knees.
“I have a lot to think about, so it could be a while.” I stood up and dusted the sand off my body. I walked toward the water and let the waves crash against my feet. I could feel his electric force field approach. That’s my best description for what I could feel.
“I’m not kidding, you won’t go back in there. At least not alone.” I could hear the challenge in his voice. “There are creatures in there that do not discriminate against beautiful ladies in their desire for a tasty snack.” He was getting closer and the encouraging challenge in his voice was causing my heart to race. How far could I get before he came after me? I didn’t allow him to get any closer before I took off into the waves. I dove into the waves once I was deep enough. When I surfaced, I turned toward shore to see his exasperated face. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” He reprimanded as he threw down his shirt and started walking slowly toward me.
I was too entranced to notice that the music had started again, until Kyler dove into a wave. The music was getting louder and closer and more intense. When Kyler surfaced next to me, he greeted me with a heartwarming smile. His dimples were so deep, I wondered if they could hold water
The electric current was intensified in the water, more magnetic and alluring. He was several feet from me and it tempted me to close the gap. “Do you hear it?” I asked him looking around for the source?
“Hear what?” His smile disappeared.
“That beautiful music.” I turned slowly, treading water, searching for it.
“I don’t hear anything except you splashing around. What’s it sound like?” He asked truly interested.
“I’ve never heard anything like it before. I heard it the other night when I was out here, but I can’t figure out where it’s coming from.”
“I have pretty good hearing, and I can’t hear it.” He looked at me with concern on his face.
“I’m not crazy. I hear it. I heard it then and I heard it the next day at the Aquarium with my Aunt Sarah, and again yesterday when Julie and I were…right before I met you.” A crazy thought entered my mind. What if it’s co
ming from him?
“I didn’t say you were crazy. Maybe you have developed hyper sensitive ears, you know, like a dog can hear a dog whistle?” His smile returned and he inched closer to me.
“Now I’m crazy and dog-like?” I bristled at his comment.
“Not even close. I think you’re extremely creative, and you’re very attractive.” His cobalt blue eyes were striking in the moonlight. They remained focused on my face until I blushed so feverishly. I had to be dreaming, because there’s no way this god-like guy could be interested in me. He was still creeping closer and I was sure I’d hyperventilate before he reached me. My eyes were locked on his and my breathing was erratic.
He plunged under the water when he was less than a foot away. I couldn’t see him, but I could still feel that magnetic pull to him. He was circling around me like a shark circling his prey. I felt his stimulating touch as he attempted to tickle me with subtle intentional jabs at my midsection. I screamed with laughter as he continued to tickle. He drifted away out of reach before surfacing a short time later. “Are you okay? I heard screaming.” A devilish smile shaped his full lips. “I told you there were creatures out here just waiting for a beautiful girl to ensnare and make her beg for mercy.” He sunk below a wave again and headed my direction. I was waiting for his tickling fingers with my hands extended for protection.
When I felt him draw near, I reached out for his assault and grasped his hand. The shock that ran through me disabled my muscles and I sank below the waves. I felt his arms wrap around my waist and pull me toward the surface. I choked spitting out water, gasping for air from his touch and the lack of cooperation from my muscles. He started pulling me toward the shore. The music changed from playful to disturbed. “I’m sorry, Raegan. Did I hurt you?” He questioned me as he helped me to shore. His touch was energizing.
“No, I’m good.” I coughed up more salt water. “I’m not sure what happened. I felt a shock and my muscles quit working for a second.”
Bonded (The Raegan Mason Trilogy) Page 5