Abigail mentally took note of all of it, though, knowing she might be staying through winter - or until Brenton decided he didn’t need to pay her anymore. She wondered how long these new patients would even want to see her - and she hadn’t even seen all of them yet. There was still Finn, the fox who’d lost his twin. She’d gotten one phone call from Brenton saying the young man was willing to talk and he would pass her number to him. Finn had yet to call her. She would wait. Brenton said she could be here for a long time, since he wanted to be absolutely positive about the health of his Pride…and the other, new shifters that were settling in his town. He was keeping an eye on all of them.
Felines don’t have territory, she thought, but Brenton Kingson certainly does.
She was staring out the window, just keeping her ears on the conversation. The wolves’ property had so many trees so close. She could almost feel the cool air on her hide if she were in doe form.
Abigail was pulled out of her head by James, who had entered the conversation when they started talking about the local humans. He stood up and was taking his plate back to the kitchen. Abigail held hers awkwardly, wondering if she should try to eat more. With a sigh, she decided against it and got up as well, to take it to James.
She was entering the kitchen when Thomas caught her eye again. He was in the recliner still and she watched him stretch out, his shirt riding up and revealing those lickable abs she knew well now.
Why did they have to be so attractive? Why couldn’t they be anyone else? Or ugly?
Then she ran into something solid and began to wobble, losing her balance and the plate started slipping from her hand. An arm wrapped around her waist to stop her from falling completely and that gave her a chance to save the plate. Barely.
“You okay there?” James asked softly, holding onto her as if it was nothing serious. Her heart began to race as she looked up and tried to smile casually.
“I’m fine,” she mumbled.
She met his eyes and there was no avoiding the scent that he was aroused with her there. Or that she was perfectly okay with being where she was. Well, her body was more than okay up against his firm chest; she was not.
“You sure? Wouldn’t want you falling all over my kitchen,” James chuckled. He shifted a little and she felt something hard pressed against her hip. This wolf was hard!
“Positive,” she breathed out, trying to pull away from him. He let her go, but it seemed reluctant, his arm leaving her waist a few seconds too late. He took her plate slowly and watched her face the entire time. She swallowed and looked away, trying to not look down at the bulge that was obviously there.
Which revealed Antonio grinning at her. She was in a house full of predators who knew exactly what had just happened. None of them would say anything, but they all knew. Even Riley and Zachary were chuckling to themselves.
“We’re going to head out,” the tiger announced. “Abigail, you want to ride with us?”
“We got her,” Thomas intervened, and not in the way Abigail had wanted. “I wanted to talk to her.”
“Ah,” Zachary sighed. He looked back at her and she gave a nod.
“I’ll stay. They can give me a ride back to the hotel when I’m done,” she told him.
Riley gave her a tight hug before leaving and Abigail just exchanged nods with Zachary. When the felines were gone, she looked over to Thomas, curious and confused. She would be their doctor, she could keep the line drawn and uncrossed. “What do you want to talk about?”
“Antonio I think beat me to this, but we really do want you to come out on a real run with us,” Thomas started, sitting up in the recliner. “I think you need it, need to get out and get back in touch with nature.”
“And what would you know about what I need?” Abigail snapped. She could be docile for her patients, calm and patient for them as they explored their feelings. But this wolf just overstepped his bounds. “You are the ones who should need therapy. Yet you’re throwing barbecues and talking about buying a bar!”
“We buried our brothers,” James whispered. “We’re allowed to move on now.”
Abigail stopped herself from saying anything as James cut in and turned back to him. Those hazel eyes were haunted now, sad and beautiful and a bit broken. He covered it up, claimed he was a wolf who could just handle it, but it was there. The pain and grief existed.
“The SSTF recovered their pelts,” Thomas whispered. “So, we buried them and sang to them as their day in our life ended.”
She remembered the last time she was here. She’d run from dinner after talking to them, after Antonio’s predatory and sexual energy had spooked her. She hadn’t known what the howls that night had meant. Now she did, and it was heartbreaking. They had buried pelts.
Not even bodies.
Skins.
“I’m sorry,” she whispered, her temper fading instantly. “I’m so sorry.”
“So, yeah,” Thomas continued, “now we’re settling. We’re moving forward. I’m an Alpha, Abigail, and I see you look out the window to the woods as if they’re a dream. I take it as a personal duty to make sure you are taking care of yourself.”
“The Herd doesn’t shift often,” she reminded him. Damn, though, he was right. As an Alpha, he did have a reputation to keep about taking care of shifters in his area. She was sure Brenton would do the same thing if he knew she never shifted or that she’d been nearly eaten by a mountain lion. “Maybe once or twice a month, at most.”
“And how long was it before we found you out in the woods?” he asked softly.
Months, but she didn’t tell him that. It had been months without reconnecting to that half of herself. The doe didn’t like or want to be in LA so Abigail didn’t let her out.
When she didn’t respond, Thomas just sighed and continued on the topic, “It’s been over two weeks since, so you’re due.”
“It’s not a big deal, Thomas,” she pressed, hoping he would drop the topic. She would ask the Pride, not the wolves. Not if they were beginning to recognize her - not if they were attracted to her and vice versa. This had complicated written all over it and she didn’t want it.
“Then it’s not a big deal for you to come out and get an hour of running in every so often,” Thomas rebutted.
Abigail pressed her lips together. “I’ll ask the Pride to use their property,” she finally blurted out.
“The Pride has too much going on,” Thomas reminded her. “You’re stuck with us for a little while.”
There were so many reasons to say no. So many. They reminded her of an awful time in her life. They brought out her prey instincts to the umpteenth degree. They were attractive, and she could feel her body coming back to life at the sight of them.
But she glanced back at the window. She knew the Pride was busy, knew they were wrapped up in a world of politics and drama she couldn’t afford to get involved in.
She looked at the woods.
“Fine,” Abigail sighed. “I’ll go running with you tomorrow. Now take me back to the hotel?”
“Sure.” He smiled at her.
“I got it,” James cut in, grabbing keys from the kitchen counter. “Let’s go, Abby.”
“Have a nice night, Thomas. Antonio.” She gave them a little wave and went to follow James out the front door. He led her to a huge black pickup truck and pulled the passenger door open for her. She nearly couldn’t climb in and didn’t resist when he took her elbow to help her in. He slammed it shut and she jumped a little at it. The entire truck shook from it.
After he got in behind the wheel and started it up, he looked at her. She met his gaze and they sat in silence for a moment.
“I wanted to talk to you,” he whispered as he got them moving down the dirt driveway.
“Talk away,” she encouraged him.
“I grew up in the Texas Pack,” he started slowly, “and my father was disgraced inner circle. I grew up with an uncle and my sisters, all five of them. He raised us on the hardline. Wolves die, and
you move on.”
“From my understanding, that’s how wolf Packs just are,” Abigail reminded him patiently. She disagreed with it on a professional level, feeling they should allow themselves more, but she was willing to admit that it was just a wolf thing.
“Then why do I hurt so much?” James asked softly. “I’m not supposed to hurt this much. Thomas…Thomas is so human thanks to his time in the Marines, but me? I’ve never been anything other than a dominant wolf.”
“It’s okay to hurt, James. It’s completely okay. This is all wrong. Everything that happened to you? It wasn’t what you were raised believing was normal. No one expects hunting compounds or…pelts,” she ended, trying to say the word without gagging. “What was your role for the Pack?”
“Why?” James asked with a bite, giving her a hard look.
“I want to understand you better. It’ll help me understand the best way to help you manage the pain and grow and find closure and solace,” she informed him gently.
“I…I was a liaison with the lower Pack members, the ones that normally fall off the radar and get forgotten. I spent all my time learning their needs and figuring out their situations, so I could speak their case to the rest of the inner circle.”
He had a heart, she noted. That had to be a hard job for an Alpha like Chris Marek, who cared only for himself and the wolves he felt were worthy to be around him.
“So you care for those weaker than you. James, you feel, and I don’t think the grief is what’s bothering you.” Abigail reached out to touch his arm. She felt the muscles of his arm tense as she laid it on his bicep. “I think it’s the idea that you shouldn’t feel it that bothers you.”
“You think I should…let it happen?” James gave her a quick look as they drove towards her hotel.
“Yes,” she whispered. “I think you should just let it happen.”
“You should take your own advice,” he mumbled as they got to the hotel. She frowned at him and he parked, meeting her gaze. “You want to run in the woods, just let us take you out there. Let it happen.”
“I’m coming back tomorrow,” Abigail pointed out. Against her better judgement, she was just ‘letting it happen,’ and she had a feeling she would regret it - but the doe in her had never been so pushy before. The doe was desperate, and Abigail had never felt such a disconnect with it before.
“Drive out around noon,” James told her, giving a small smile. “And whatever happens, just let it happen.”
“Now I’m wondering if you’re planning something,” she muttered, narrowing her eyes on him. He gave a shrug.
“Thanks for listening to me,” was all he said, dismissing the topic of the run altogether. “Thomas and I are a lot alike, but he’s used to this…human shit where I’m not. He keeps telling me I need to talk to someone, if not him or Tony. He was right - just don’t tell him I said that.”
“Doctor-patient confidentiality,” she reminded him, grabbing her purse from between them. “Goodnight, James.”
“You too, Abby,” he called after her as she left the truck.
10
James
James made his way back inside the farmhouse slowly. It was a nice place. He liked it, but it didn’t feel like home. Home had been full of wolves, full of family and friends. Home had been in South Dakota, where he would go on a weekly drive to where some of the poorer wolves lived and play with their kids and talk to the parents about food costs or a bad harvest. Milk prices going up. All manner of things.
This wasn’t home, and he couldn’t go home. The guys had promised to stay out of South Dakota unless they intended to challenge Heather Davis for her seat on top of their old throne. Thomas didn’t want it and James didn’t blame him. He barely wanted it, if he did at all.
He wanted the kids back, the community. None of the other shit. None of the inner circle Pack politics. He loved his brothers to death, but they had disagreed on so much all the time.
And he was fucking pleased as hell Chris was gone.
“Stop letting the cold in, Jay!” Tony yelled from the living room.
He frowned and realized he was just standing by the front door like a fucking idiot. He got inside and locked the door before finding the guys lying in the living room with the tube on.
“Sorry,” he answered gruffly. “I talked to her on the drive,” he admitted to them.
“Figured you wanted to,” Thomas said mildly, giving him a small smile. “And?”
“She’s good.” He didn’t really want to tell them every little detail of his feelings. “She’ll be here tomorrow around noon.”
“Fantastic,” Tony chuckled. “Can’t wait.”
“A run will be good for her,” Thomas yawned. “Did you see? She barely ate anything today.”
“Seriously,” Tony snorted. “That’s fine. We’ll get her some exercise and food, and she’ll start feeling like a real shifter again. You can tell she locks that shit away.”
“I wonder if it’s because she’s prey,” James pondered, sitting next to Tony on the couch. “She probably works with a lot of predators and she needs to lock the doe down if she’s going to handle it.”
“That’s incredibly insightful,” their Alpha mumbled, flicking through the channels.
“You’re feeling protective,” James pointed out.
“I am,” Thomas sighed. “It’s like a fucking itch. She’s so damn smart, but she’s skittish with a bite. Like she’ll run, but she’ll kick you on the way. And then she does things like refusing to sit down out in the woods when she knows she needs to recover her strength. Or eat. Or go for a run where she’s safe. Every time I tell her to do something, she immediately doesn’t want to, even when it’s obvious it’s good for her. She’s driving me a little mad with it every time it pops up.”
“You aren’t her Alpha,” Tony reminded him. “Maybe she just doesn’t like you trying to be.”
“Well, damnit,” he growled. “I’m not going to let her mistreat herself. She’ll come run with us and we’ll talk to her like she wants us to do. We all win.”
“Pragmatic Thomas strikes again.” Tony laughed. “Got to make everything make sense.”
“Why did she ignore us for two weeks?” James asked, suddenly stuck on it. She’d blown them off completely until the felines dragged her to the barbecue.
“Well,” Thomas groaned. “None of us requested to talk to her as a therapist. I don’t think she’s really interested in us past that.”
“Bullshit,” Tony chuckled. “She and James had a fucking moment in the kitchen.”
James growled pleasantly at the memory. She was a lithe body, swaying with the breeze, he thought. Having her pressed up next to him like that? He’d gotten hard immediately and there was no way she could ever deny she didn’t like it. It had set off every predatory and sexual instinct in him. He’d wanted to take the damn plate, throw it on the floor, and chase her to a damn bedroom. Once he’d caught her, he would have seen exactly how big those doe eyes could get.
He would have made sure she was cool with it, though, and she obviously wasn’t. She was a runner, but not in the way that would allow him to chase. He wasn’t going to chase a woman who didn’t want it.
He could woo her though. He and Tony were of the same mind on that.
“Where did you go, James?” Thomas asked, grinning from his recliner.
“The bedroom,” James growled. “And the steps I need to get there.”
“You’re both awful.” He laughed, shaking his head. “Leave her be.”
“You leave her be, Alpha,” he challenged. “She brings it out in you, too.”
“Her lack of care for herself when she’s supposed to care for others brings out my need to take care of her.” Thomas growled back at him.
James wondered why his Alpha was pushing back so hard against the idea that he could possibly be seriously attracted to her. He was - James and Tony knew it. They could smell it on him, see the way he watched her. His Alpha instincts w
ere kicking in because he wanted her. They saw the way he reacted when she was turned on because of him, because of any of them.
James leaned back on the couch and just stared at his Alpha for a long time. He was forgetting something, he knew he was. Ten years of friendship and…
Thomas got up and left the room. They could hear the back door open and close.
“This is about his divorce, isn’t it?” James asked the last wolf, who nodded a little.
“I have a feeling it is,” Tony answered. “It was a rocky one.”
“It was nearly twenty years ago.” He huffed, annoyed in a way. “He’s been with women since. Why not this one?”
“I don’t know,” Tony muttered, with a shrug. “I have no idea.”
James grumbled and turned the thought over in his mind for what felt like hours. Tony eventually got up and went to his room for sleep. Thomas came back in but never returned to the living room.
James, close to midnight, turned the tube off and went to his own room. He stripped down, preferring to sleep in the nude, and slid into bed, pulling a pillow over his head.
“Look at what we have here! You’re all awake,” a hunter laughed, walking into the warehouse-like compound the Pack was being held in. James shifted into his human form to glare at the piece of shit human that was coming to talk to them. He heard someone gag and looked over to Chris, the weak piece of shit they called their Alpha. He looked like he was going to lose his lunch.
Not like there was anything in their stomachs to lose.
“What do you want?” Thomas growled. Now, Thomas? He was an Alpha. Too bad he was okay playing second fiddle to his brother, just cleaning up the messes Chris left in his wake. James understood it and didn’t. Thomas didn’t want to kill his older brother for the spot. “What now?”
None of that mattered anymore, James reminded himself. None of it. They were locked in cages due to their own stupidity and three of their brothers were now dead for it.
Prey to the Heart (Wolves of Wild Junction Book 1) Page 11