by C. S Luis
“Claudia,” I looked over at him. I was startled as if he had just appeared there. He looked shaken and worried. I blinked at him, looking around the room, finding Mr. Claypool’s concerned face staring back at me in the same manner.
“What happened?” he asked. I was unsure of everything myself; I didn’t know what to say, how to tell him what I had seen. I had no doubt he would believe me, I just didn’t want to worry him any further.
“Mr. Claypool found you unresponsive. My god, you gave us quite a scare. I had no idea what I would do. Or what we should do,” Michael added.
I trembled. Michael grabbed me and held me in his arms to try to keep me from shaking.
“Claudia, what’s wrong, please tell me,” I held onto him. “I wish I knew how to help you…”
He held me tighter.
On my return to Milton the following day, I tried to avoid Jimmy, especially after seeing him coming out of Michael’s office later in the day. Rachel and her minions said nothing to me. I think I had sparked fear in them.
‘Good,’ I thought, now perhaps they would leave me alone. The nightmares had left me shaken, the crystal was not helping; this shadow figure was haunting and daring, it didn’t fear the crystal as Quentin had. I didn’t know what to do, how to stop it.
Michael didn’t know either; I could see he was far more worried. He slept in my room like an overprotective guardian on a cot he pulled from the attic. I insisted that I was fine but I honestly felt less afraid having him near, although I got very little sleep.
I made it almost the entire day avoiding Jimmy. But one thing about Jimmy that he had in common with Mr. Slater was persistence.
“Claudia?” I stopped, turning to look down the hallway. Jimmy stood there, backpack slung over one shoulder and looking at me. His mouth hung open slightly. No doubt I looked awful. Lack of sleep does that to you. But I doubted that was what he was reacting to, from what I felt in his heart and mind. I spun on my heel and continued on my way, hurrying through the empty hallways of the school. Everyone else had gone home. I wanted to head to the main office to wait for Michael.
I could hear his shoes on the floor behind me. “Don’t, Jimmy!” I shouted.
The sound stopped for a moment, then started again. Faster. I broke into a run, but he was faster than I was. He grabbed me by the shoulder.
“Claudia, wait!”
I stopped with my back against a few lockers, completely confronted by Jimmy’s beautiful blue eyes. He pushed back his blond locks of hair, standing to face me and dropping the backpack alongside the lockers.
“What happened yesterday? Tell me what I did to make you so angry at me.”
I honestly wasn’t angry with him. It was those around us, elements and forces, that seemed to be keeping us from being together. My feelings were not entirely devoted to us because they felt alien. We felt alien together. But looked just as normal as any human couple.
“Rachel happened,” I snapped. His eyes grew sad.
“Do you want me to say something to her? It’s over between her and me. In fact, it barely was a thing! I’m with you.”
I wanted to ask, why are you with me? But I thought it would have been too mean. And I didn’t want to hurt Jimmy. I liked him, no matter how strange and alien our relationship felt. I wanted a chance to be a normal girl. I wanted a chance to be loved, a chance to love him back. His feelings were genuine and honest.
“Are you?” I asked. He nodded his head. He came in nearer and took my hand. I let him. He caressed my fingers into his.
“I want more than anything to be with you,” he cupped my cheek, drawing close; I wanted to let him kiss me but the anger wouldn’t allow me. I turned my head away. I could sense he was hurt, but more than anything he wanted to win me back.
“I need to get my books from my locker.”
He nodded again and walked with me to the second floor where my locker was located. He waited next to it while I grabbed my books, replacing the ones in my backpack with others from my locker.
“Do you want to go out on the field?” he asked.
I thought about it for a moment. The field was our special spot. A place to run around, stretch our legs after a long day in the cramped school. Lately, though, it had felt more like a prison yard to me. A place where I could have the semblance of freedom, but I was really trapped by six-foot-tall fences with barbed wire at the top. I shook my head.
“The art room?”
I smiled at him. He knew my favorite places. We walked through the school, my feet padding on the floor. In the second hallway, he took my hand. I let him. It didn’t take long until we were flipping the lights on in the art classroom and I went over to my easel.
“Do you want to talk about the Rachel thing?”
“No,” I said, reaching for my paintbrush. “You could tell me why Michael called you into his office.”
Jimmy never got in trouble. I couldn’t help but wonder if that thing on the roof, the weird things happening all around me, were spilling over onto him.
Jimmy hesitated, picking up a piece of origami paper and beginning to fold. “We talked about yesterday.”
“Oh.” I wasn’t sure what to do. The silence stretched between us as I awkwardly mixed paint and he started creating a paper crane. “Jimmy, I don’t...”
“It’s okay.”
“What?”
“Michael explained it to me, I hope you don’t mind.”
Well, that was something! Michael didn’t even explain any of it to me! What had he told poor Jimmy had happened? I put my hands on my hips, staring at Jimmy, waiting for him to elaborate.
“It was the sun’s reflection, not some strange vortex. What else could it be, you know? I couldn’t tell what was going on, but I understand if you’re having nightmares and sleepwalking. I mean, it’s kind of cute.”
Sleepwalking? Nightmares?
“I mean, he told me it can be contagious. We were probably just sharing the same dream, you know? Since we started dating, I’ve been really in touch with my senses and all, so it was an empathetic reaction?”
“Empathic?” Michael was slick, but what I was really wondering was how or why Jimmy was buying this. Was he so in love with me, that he would believe even this? Honestly? Had Mr. Slater been this accepting? I was starting to question what Rachel had said about me, being odd. Were all men this accepting? Maybe I did put men under a strange spell?
“Isn’t that the same thing?” he asked.
I shrugged, turning to my easel and making a quick slash across it with a wide brush covered in black paint. I liked the way it cut through the bright white blank. A painting always began with a single stroke.
“So, you think we were just having a shared nightmare?”
I looked at him from around the edge of the easel, before taking my brush and doing a streak of blue. Abstract seemed like the right design. This conversation was abstract.
“Doesn’t that make the most sense?” he added, finishing his paper crane with a quick bend of its little head. He started on a second one. ‘No,’ I wanted to say, ‘are you serious? Not even close.’
“Sure,” I said. Honestly, I didn’t have a better explanation. Not for any of it. Not the strange voices, the figures I’d been seeing, the strangeness that seemed to spring up around me whenever teachers were present. Wouldn’t it be nice to just chalk it up to sleepwalking and a bad dream? It was a nice story. I wanted to buy it. Jimmy was kind of simple-minded, so I was sure he did believe what Michael had told him. Maybe I should go talk to the principal, too.
I laid a fat blob of yellow paint onto my color pallet and began swirling it with the red to make a vibrant orange. The color went onto the canvas in a swish and a swipe. The white began to disappear, just like the strange whiteness I sometimes saw at the corner of my eye.
“Are you excited about prom?”
Right, prom. I’d forgotten all about it. I shrugged.
“I can’t wait to see you in your dress.�
�
“It’s nothing fancy. I mean, it’s not like we can shop for much around here. It’s easier for boys; you put on a tux and you’ll look great even if it’s old-fashioned.” I looked at him again and grinned at the blush on his cheeks. I liked Jimmy. I really did.
“I’m sure you’ll look better than me. You’re beautiful, Claudia Belle, and nothing those cheerleaders say or do will change my mind.”
I watched him, unconsciously reaching out to see if those words were sincere. His thoughts were always a warm bubble, a sense of simplicity that the rest of my life didn’t even begin to have. Stepping from around my canvas, I walked over to him and cupped his cheeks, not worrying about the paint I smeared there. His face was a canvas too, and I was leaving my mark. I leaned close and he met me in a kiss.
As I kissed him, something tickled at the back of my mind. A voice? No, a presence of some kind. I squeezed my eyes shut as if doing so would un-see the spectral figure that had appeared in the corner of my vision. ‘I am not seeing visions.’ I told myself, repeating it three or four times. ‘It was a shared nightmare, like Michael told Jimmy. That’s what I’m going to believe.’
“Feeling better?” Jimmy asked.
“Much,” I replied.
“Good, because I have a surprise for you.”
I blinked up at him. He smiled.
Surprise?
10
Prom
This was the moment of truth…
* * *
Milton High School, Prom June 1, 2013, 7 pm…
* * *
I stood in front of the mirror, looking at the dress Jimmy had surprised me with after school two weeks earlier.
That day after we had made up in the art room, he led me to Michael’s office. I saw him seated at his desk. He looked up and caught sight of us, inviting us in. I walked in, curiously looking over at him. He came around his desk.
“So, he told you?” I gazed over at Michael questionably.
“He said he had a surprise for me.”
Jimmy came around and walked to a corner of the room where Michael’s suit coat hung. From behind it, he pulled out a long plastic garment bag. I gazed over at Jimmy as he stepped towards me.
“I wanted to get you something,” he simply said. He leaned forward and kissed my cheek sweetly.
I stared up at Michael; he had a large grin on his face as he winked at me.
“What is it?” I uttered. The two men were beside themselves with delight.
Jimmy handed me the hanger and I pulled away the plastic, beneath was a glimmering and sparkling, dark blue dress. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen.
“I think the girls are going to be jealous,” Michael said.
It wasn’t like I had asked for any of these things to happen to me. But this was the best thing happening to me now.
“Well done, Jimmy,” I heard Michael say. I tried to ignore the men in their proud moment, admiring the dress instead.
“Do you like it?” Jimmy asked. I gazed over at him and kissed him, squeezing him to me.
“I love it!” I whispered, excitement in my voice, only now realizing Michael was watching us. But he looked pleased for someone whose adopted daughter was kissing a boy in front of him.
“You did well, Jimmy,” I heard him say again.
I was blushing now, as I felt Jimmy put his arm around my waist and pull me close to his side. Almost immediately, the image of Mr. Slater pulling me to him in the same manner when Jimmy had taken our picture came to mind. The move was similar; Mr. Slater putting his arm around my waist drawing me close. Jimmy imitated the same move now. I gazed over at him, a smile spread across his face. Was he recalling the same memory? I doubted it, but then, he winked at me.
“You two look perfect together,” Michael stated. “Claudia’s lucky to have you, Jimmy,”
I couldn’t stop blushing, since Jimmy hadn’t stopped staring at me.
“No, I’m the lucky one, Michael.”
When the sun shone on me it really shone. For a minute, trying on the dress, I’d almost felt like a normal girl. Not one masquerading as normal.
The dress Jimmy chose was dark blue with something sparkly across the bosom and cascading down the front of it. I adjusted the slim straps on my shoulders and turned this way and that, watching the light play on the silky material. After a minute, I looked up to check my hair.
I’d done it myself and I wasn’t sure it was fancy or intricate enough for prom. I’d mostly just pulled it up, making some curls that fell down my back or draped over my shoulders so it wouldn’t fall over my eyes the rest of the evening. I added a bit of makeup; I usually didn’t like wearing any but this evening I thought it would be nice to do something different.
I spun one last time, took a deep breath and went to meet Jimmy.
I came down the stairs, dressed in the long blue gown. Michael was at the bottom of the steps taking pictures. I felt out of place, strange to feel normal, but a part of me was saying, ‘I need normal.’
I smiled instead, steady in my steps, and came down slowly as Jimmy’s eyes followed me down the stairs. His deep blue eyes never left me through every step as I moved and came to stand in front of him. He was handsome, as I expected.
He asked me to prom and almost immediately asked me out. I was surprised when he did; not appalled by his boldness but because I had said yes.
I felt closer to him since then, and even if our relationship had felt alien to me, I felt I could love him. I felt that with him I could have a normal life and accept this. This is what it was supposed to feel like to be normal. This is what it was to be a normal person. I told myself, ‘embrace it.’
He seemed at a loss for words, speechless; even Michael was beside himself. I glanced at Jimmy, then at Michael. ‘Is he crying?’ I thought as he wiped at his eyes. He was!
“I only wish Neil was here to see this,” I heard Michael say.
I felt my face burning as Jimmy neared.
“You look so beautiful.”
“So do you,” I replied, admiring his black tux. He smiled as I blushed. “I mean handsome.”
He clumsily lifted a small box and opened it. He pulled out a beautiful orchid and reached to pin it on the side of my gown. But his hands were shaking so much he nearly pricked me with the pin instead.
Michael looked on and that only made Jimmy a little more nervous under his watchful stare. He pulled away anxiously, and took my hand, as I smiled at him, and tied the orchid onto my wrist.
The camera flash from Michael’s iPhone caught us by surprise and we turned for the picture. Michael signaled us to move closer. It was an awkward moment. I didn’t know how to act, but Jimmy seemed comfortable, as nervous as he had been before, he seemed to suddenly know how to handle himself.
He pulled me close to him, putting his arm around my waist like Mr. Slater had. And like he had before in Michael’s office when Jimmy had first presented me the dress. Why had that very image come into my mind so suddenly again?
I could feel his confidence far more now. It had grown over our time together. Not that Jimmy wasn’t already proud and bold, but now he was far more comfortable and, with me by his side he felt far more confident. I felt like his trophy again.
“I have to go,” Michael said. “I’m running late and I’m the principal.”
“We understand,” we both said.
“You kids know where the place is, right?”
Jimmy nodded. “Yes, sir.”
“Okay, you kids have fun and I’ll see you there. And no drinking…Jim, I’m counting on you to keep an eye on my daughter.” Jimmy blushed; that was a first.
“Not a problem, Dr. McClellan. I won’t let anything happen to her. I promise,” he replied.
Michael left and we followed outside.
There was no limo waiting for us. We took Jimmy’s car. Michael was behind us looking like a proud father. I was surprised he was okay with me and Jimmy. Not only that, he said I could stay ou
t a little later if I liked. I doubted that would be necessary. I wanted him to be stricter than that; to tell me we had to be home on time.
But I think he was still considering normal and that this was finally the normal we needed back into our lives. My dreams had stopped. I didn’t know if it was because of the crystal that I now religiously was taking to bed with me. I didn’t know what had happened, but I welcomed the peace for the moment. I just wanted to be happy and free of fear.
I waved to Michael, and Jimmy opened the car door for me and I climbed in. Michael was already in his car pulling out of the driveway. We watched his car disappear in the distance. Soon after, we were on our way.
When we arrived, the parking lot was almost full. The location was a large ballroom in the fancy Galleria shopping area of Westheimer, in one of the large and fancy hotels. I think Jimmy noticed my eyes admiring the place, when I looked over at him, he was smiling back at me.
He drove up front to the hotel valet. I was surprised when we stopped and one of the men opened the door for me.
“This is so beautiful,” I gasped. He smiled as the valet extended a hand to me, helping me out of the vehicle. Jimmy hurried over to my side and took my hand into his, pulling me close.
I glanced over at him as he led me away.
We had a quick walk to the entrance. Strangely enough, I was content for the moment. I just wanted to enjoy the evening. I was trying to forget everything else that troubled me. John Slater, Quentin, the dreams, and the darkness that would sometimes come to me at night when I was alone. The darkness that I knew was far more dangerous than even the stranger in white that Mr. Slater knew. This was my moment. I planned to leave all those things behind at the door. I wanted to give Jimmy my full attention. If this was what it meant to be normal, I would embrace it.
We walked arm in arm into the prom; the entrance was large and open. I felt like a princess in a grand palace; there were so many students I didn’t recognize.