How to Convince a Boy to Kiss You

by Tara Eglington

  Sara laughed. ‘Cass, you aren’t any better. You were just talking about the type of dog you and Scott are going to get when you move in together. And I saw those wedding dresses on your Pinterest board.’

  ‘They’re inspiration for an artwork,’ Cass protested. ‘I’m painting a girl in a long white gown.’

  ‘Mmm.’ Sara sounded sceptical.

  ‘So, do you think I should watch the movie?’ Lindsay asked me. She’d looked it up on my iPad.

  ‘Everyone should watch it,’ I said as I closed my eyes and concentrated on Keats’s voice again.

  ‘I haven’t stopped thinking about you all day,’ Hayden said to me later that afternoon. We were both lying on our backs on a picnic blanket in the park. It was the most beautiful autumn day and we were watching the clouds sail by, their whiteness startling against the crisp blue sky. ‘I think you’ve broken my brain.’

  I couldn’t resist. ‘Wasn’t it already broken?’

  He rolled over onto his side and poked my shoulder. ‘It’d have to be to fall for you. Four years of unrequited advances. You know, my dad once said the definition of madness is repeating the same action again and again, each time expecting a different result. And yet I hung on, teasing you day after day, hoping my witty comments would bring you round.’

  ‘And they did,’ I replied, reaching for his hand to kiss it. ‘You know, Emily Dickinson wrote that “much madness is divinest sense”. Less poetically, I kind of think of you as a piece of sand in an oyster’s shell. You annoyed me and annoyed me until I realised you were a pearl.’

  ‘Do we have to call my determined pursuit “annoyance”?’ Hayden laughed.

  ‘I’m calling you a pearl, silly. And did you notice I resisted using the sand metaphor in respect of the recent exfoliation of my face?’

  ‘It’s still beautiful to me,’ Hayden said. He ran his finger along my nose, along my cheeks and down to my lips, looking at me reverently.

  My mobile rang and I sat up to pull it from my handbag.

  ‘Nope.’ Hayden grabbed the phone from me. ‘We’ve only got an hour until we both have to be home for dinner and I don’t want to share even one of those sixty minutes.’ He looked at the caller ID. ‘Jeffrey can wait, can’t he?’

  ‘I promised to be fully available to my matchmakees during the campaign period,’ I said. ‘I already missed out on helping Chloe on Sunday. I have to take this.’

  Hayden nodded and handed me the phone.

  ‘Jeffrey.’ I answered the call just before it rang out.

  ‘Babe,’ Jeffrey said. ‘So, I’ve played that doco you lent me about a million times and I think I have my courtship dance all choreographed.’

  ‘So you’re ready to make a move on Piper?’

  When we met on Sunday, I’d let Jeffrey know who his final match was. Turned out they shared a chemistry class together and Piper’s lab area was right next to his. Jeffrey had long been hoping to cause a non-school-based reaction of his own.

  ‘I’ve like kicked butt on that already, Aurora. Here’s the story — at the start of chemistry today I offered to help Piper set up her Bunsen burner. You know, this chivalry thing really works with chicks. She’s never noticed me before, but when I started pulling out the beakers she was totally grateful. Anyways, I let her go on about all these girly things without interrupting, just like you advised. Most of it was kind of confusing, like how her best friend bought the same dress as her for this music festival and Piper thinks it’s like totally bad or something. Anyways, after all of that I found out she has a thing for French food. My dad went to some fancy-schmancy place recently and when I said the name, she like flipped out. I saw my chance and asked her if she wanted to check it out Friday night. I was expecting her to say she had to shop for a new dress now her best friend had ruined her festival outfit, but you’re not going to believe it — it worked! For like the first time ever!’

  ‘Good job, Jeffrey!’ I was so proud of him.

  ‘I did good, right?’ He sounded thrilled to have scored his date so easily. ‘So do you have any other tips for Friday? This is like my first proper date and I don’t want to commit some unknown girl crime.’

  ‘Take her flowers,’ I advised. ‘Not red roses or a big bunch because they’re a bit much for a first date, but maybe a few lilies or something that smells lovely. Something that says “this is a date”, in case she’s wondering if you’re just asking her to do something as a friend. Once you get to the restaurant, make sure you open doors for her and pull her chair out. They’re tiny gestures, but huge ticks on the girl checklist. Let her do a lot of the talking during the meal, like you did today. I’ve been out with so many guys who just go on about themselves the whole time.’

  Hayden let out a snort. I knew he was remembering a few of the candidates he’d seen dropping me home from dates. I turned away so I didn’t start giggling.

  ‘Girls are really impressed when a guy wants to know lots about her, rather than using the date as a brag session. That said, you have to make sure you still talk about yourself enough to allow her to build a positive picture of you.’

  ‘Okay …’

  I could tell Jeffrey was confused. ‘I’ll come over tomorrow night and do some role-play with you, okay? We’ll get it down pat.’

  ‘Will you help me with my outfit too? I want to look smokin’ for Friday.’

  ‘No problems.’

  I smiled as Jeffrey hung up. He might be the class clown but he was certainly endearing in his way. I was hoping that Piper would realise that too.

  ‘Ah, the inside story on what impresses women,’ Hayden said. ‘Jeffrey’s going to have an edge with all this coaching. I never knew when to stop going on about myself back when I was courting you. You thinking I was arrogant and a know-all seemed to be the only thing that got a passionate response.’

  ‘You bumbled your way through it.’

  I put my phone down beside me and reached over to kiss his forehead. Hayden tried to turn it into a proper kiss.

  ‘Hayden, I’m sorry, my face is killing me …’

  ‘Now I’m Lethal Lips.’ Hayden sighed and pulled his jacket out of his schoolbag to put it round my shoulders. ‘You look cold. If there wasn’t an awesome sunset coming up, I’d say let’s go find some hot chocolate at a café.’

  ‘Let’s stay.’ I lay back down and snuggled into Hayden’s chest.

  I’d never felt safe like this in my whole life. Being in someone’s arms was like a warm bath on a cold day or sheets fresh out of the tumble dryer. Utter reassurance. Since Mum had left, I hadn’t had a lot of cuddles. Sure, Dad and I had a great bond and he always gave me a quick hug before I went to bed, but it wasn’t like this. My brain, always in chatter mode, overanalysing each and every aspect of my life, seemed to slow to a pleasant hum while I was encircled by Hayden’s arms. My breathing became a steady rhythm and, despite the cold, I felt like I might drift away to dreamland any minute. I yawned and realised that my lips were in permanent smile mode.

  Suddenly the phone rang again.

  ‘Don’t get it.’ Hayden’s voice sounded sleepy, but he loosened his grip around me, obviously resigned to the fact that I was on matchmaker duty.

  ‘It’s Tyler.’ I was mystified. He’d pretty much never called me on my mobile.

  ‘Tyler, is Lindsay okay?’ I asked when I answered.

  ‘I don’t know. I’m calling you because I was hoping you’d be able to answer that question.’ He sounded miserable. ‘She’s been so weird lately. I know I messed up by not going on camp, but I really tried to make it up to her with the lunch, and I was planning on surprising her with Taylor Swift tickets — she’s coming on tour and I know Lindsay’s desperate to go. I bought two tickets the second they went on sale.’

  ‘Tyler, that’s really sweet.’

  ‘I don’t mind going with her even though I know I’m going to have to take earplugs because of all the screaming,’ Tyler continued. ‘I was going to give her the tickets to
night, but then we got into a totally weird fight. All over some film about a poet.’

  Uh-oh. ‘Bright Star, by any chance?’

  ‘That’s the one. I was having a hard time following it because I’m used to action movies. Anyways, I was trying because Lindsay seemed so into it, and then I kind of made this comment about not getting why the poet guy —’

  ‘Keats.’

  ‘Yeah, Keats, was like so morbid. He was saying something about wanting his hour of death and that girl at the same time. He’s like a vampire or something.’

  I got an image of John Keats and Edward Cullen side by side. They were certainly of the same type — worshippers of the women they loved.

  ‘Keats felt battered by the world,’ I explained. ‘He didn’t mean graves or coffins when he talked about death; he envisaged escaping to a place with less suffering, accompanied by the one he loved.’

  Hayden had sat up and was staring at me. Tyler was the last person you’d ever expect to be discussing John Keats.

  ‘Well, Lindsay could have just said that.’ Tyler sounded put out. ‘Instead, she leapt up from the couch, ejected the DVD from my player and shouted that I didn’t understand anything about passion.’

  I’d obviously been spot on yesterday when I’d suspected what was behind Lindsay’s weird mood and the request not to work with Hunter. She’d obviously been hugely affected by his comment at camp.

  ‘I don’t get poetry or classical music, but I do know what I feel when I look at Lindsay,’ Tyler said. ‘I know I want to be around to cover her with a blanket anytime she’s cold. I know I want to be cheering her on when she stages her fashion shows. And I know that when she laughs it makes me happier than anything else, even scoring the winning goal in a soccer game. Yes, I was an idiot at the beginning of term, but I learnt my lesson one hundred times over when I lost her. Aurora, you need to help me. Things are seriously bad between us. She won’t even pick up the phone since she left my place. I tried driving round to hers, but her mum said she hadn’t come home yet.’

  ‘Of course, Tyler. I’ll call her right now,’ I said. ‘I’ll make sure she knows exactly what you just told me. I’ll ring you back.’

  I hung up and immediately called Lindsay. No response. I didn’t want to leave a message, because this was something we needed to talk about together, in detail.

  ‘Tyler and Keats?’ Hayden asked.

  ‘Let’s just say Lindsay and Tyler’s viewing of the film wasn’t as successful as ours. I’d better head home. I think Lindsay and I have a pretty intense night of discussion ahead of us.’

  I kept calling Lindsay all evening but the phone continued to ring out. I even called her home phone, but Lindsay’s mum said she was at a friend’s. After texting around, I knew she wasn’t at Jelena’s, Cass’s or Sara’s. Maybe she was hanging out with one of her other friends from school, someone who wasn’t so involved with the TylerandLindsay saga. I could understand she might need some cool-down time after the Bright Star fight.

  The next morning I waited for her at her locker.

  ‘Aurora, I know you were trying to reach me all night,’ Lindsay said before I could even form any words. ‘I’m sorry, I was watching a DVD with a friend and I’d put my phone on silent after having a fight with Tyler.’

  ‘I know about the fight,’ I said. ‘Tyler called me, which is why I was worried about you —’

  ‘Tyler went and complained to you?’ Lindsay sighed as she got her books out of her locker. ‘OMG, that idiot. I’m really sorry.’

  ‘Linds, it’s no problem. I’m more than happy to talk about things with both you and Tyler if —’

  ‘That’s exactly what I don’t want,’ Lindsay interrupted. ‘Like Jelena said, I need to come to my own decisions about my relationship. I don’t want to end up holding anyone else responsible if I make a choice based on their advice. After all, nobody knows what truly goes on in a relationship except the two people involved.’

  ‘I’m just worried that you might not realise exactly how passionate Tyler is about you.’

  It was so easy for self-doubt and negativity to cloud your evaluation of your partner. I knew that firsthand. If Lindsay heard what Tyler had told me —

  ‘Aurora, I know you’re a matchmaker, but this time I just really need you to butt out.’

  Lindsay shut her locker with a bang and headed off down the hall to her maths class. I watched her, shocked. Even during the break-up with Tyler she’d valued my opinion.

  ‘She’s not herself at all,’ Tyler said. He’d joined me at her locker, obviously hoping to attempt what I’d just failed at.

  ‘She wants me and the girls to keep out of it,’ I said. ‘I think you’re on your own with this one. I mean, I’m more than happy to advise you, but I can’t plead your case with Lindsay.’

  ‘I’m not losing her again.’ Tyler’s jaw was set.

  ‘Why don’t you wait till Friday so she can calm down, and then give her the concert tickets?’

  Tyler nodded. ‘I think I’ll book a nice dinner for before the show too. I need to bring out the big guns.’

  ‘She wants passion, so you’re going to need to deliver. Good luck, comrade.’

  It was really hard to take a step back from being Ms Relationship Fix It, but I had to have faith in Tyler. He’d originally won Lindsay’s heart, so he should be able to recapture it, right?

  CHAPTER 26

  ‘Me! Hauled into the principal’s office! The indignity!’ Jelena raved as she joined Sara, Cass and me at the school gate at the end of the day. ‘How stupid can people be? “May be insulting to people’s religious beliefs” — they were buttons and bracelets! We aren’t even a Christian school! Do Christians even own the acronym WWJD?’

  Jelena had made some bracelets with the letters standing for ‘What Would Jelena Do?’ instead of ‘What Would Jesus Do?’.

  ‘I think they took more offence at the huge banners paraded near the school entrance while the ice-cream truck was parked there,’ I said. ‘Apparently some parents who were driving past to go to St Andrew’s saw them and called Mr Quinten to complain that the school was using Jesus for a political purpose.’

  ‘How many times do US presidential candidates talk about God in their campaigns?’ Jelena pointed out. ‘I told Mr Quinten that, but he said that he didn’t want me following US politicians’ lead on this particular matter. You know, maybe there is an association to be drawn between me and Jesus. They unfairly persecuted him too.’

  We all exchanged smiles. Jelena’s comment was over the top, but we could tell she needed to rant.

  She let out a huge sigh. ‘Money and resources completely wasted.’

  ‘Hey, everyone appreciated the free ice-cream,’ Cassie said.

  ‘That’ll be forgotten by next week.’ Jelena’s voice became depressed instead of angry. ‘Getting Mr Whippy to show up was simply a lure to get everyone to put on bracelets and buttons.’

  ‘Small minds can’t grasp great ideas, can they?’ Alex said, approaching us.

  ‘Clear off, Alex,’ Jelena ordered. ‘I’m not in the mood to tolerate your gloating.’

  ‘This isn’t gloating, it’s an observation. I actually agree with you,’ Alex said without a hint of sarcasm.

  We all looked at him, wondering what twisted point he was trying to make.

  ‘Before Mr Quinten spoke with you, he was in a meeting with my uncle,’ Alex continued. ‘He thinks One Hour Later is a brilliant concept, but my uncle told me in confidence that Mr Quinten said I was unlikely to get voted in. When it comes to the captaincy, the school council counts for a third of the votes, and they have serious doubts about me because I haven’t been at Jefferson for even a full term yet.’

  ‘Well, boo-hoo.’ Jelena’s foot was tapping impatiently like she was seconds from walking away. ‘I still don’t understand why you’re telling me this.’

  ‘They have doubts about you too,’ Alex said. ‘They did a preliminary poll yesterday and Julie River
s apparently has half the school-council votes tied up.’

  ‘Julie? She’s had no innovative ideas so far. She’s pretty much outlined that she’s continuing the legacy of her predecessor.’

  ‘She’s the safe vote,’ Alex explained. ‘Her policies aren’t controversial and won’t cost very much, which is their concern with you. GHDs, extreme sports trips — they all cost money.’

  ‘So what? The money comes from student fundraising.’

  ‘Which the majority of the board members feel would be better spent on things like new carpets for the music room or further IT resources. They also worry that you’re too self-involved, which could prove a risk when it comes to putting in the extra time and effort demanded by the role.’

  ‘I may be self-involved, but I’m not going to flake out on my responsibilities as school captain!’ Jelena looked insulted.

  ‘Basically, Julie’s going to become school captain unless either of us wins the student vote by a landslide.’

  ‘Hey, that could happen,’ Jelena said confidently.

  ‘Currently, as my political spies tell me, our respective voters are torn between you or me. Half the guys are hyped up about my gym program; the other half are keen to do more of your Take It to Another Level stuff. Plenty of the girls want an extra hour of sleep and intend to vote for me, but an equal number say they won’t vote for me because I’m seen as chauvinistic.’

  ‘Funny that,’ Jelena shot back.

  ‘So say, come election day, that there’s an equal number of voters for you and me,’ Alex went on. ‘There’s probably another third of kids at Jefferson who are just plain apathetic and will vote Julie in because they don’t care. So by my calculation, the votes will be around a third each, which gives it to Julie if the school council swings her way. You and I have both been campaigning our butts off — I don’t think there’s anything more either of us can do on our own to win more votes.’ Alex paused. ‘Our only option is to join forces.’