Red’s prayers were broken by fear as he held her and tried to share his heat. “Please, God, don’t take my Cassie away from me. Protect her, Lord. Please.” Red sent his petitions to God with such fervency that they generated their own heat.
Moments passed. Red could feel Cassie slipping away from him as if she were being drawn back into the mean, hard cold of the stones. The door to the outside was still open. He’d been running when he came in and let it swing wide. He needed to go out there, close the door, and stoke the fire to warm the cabin up, but he was afraid to leave her, even for those few minutes.
“Please, God, please. Protect her, Lord. I love her.” Red kissed her cold, blue lips and rested his face against hers, shuddering from the lifeless, waxy cold.
Then her teeth chattered.
Red pulled back when he heard that bit of sound. She lay motionless, but he knew she’d responded. He continued caressing her, praying for her, calling her back to him.
The shivering started small and lasted only a minute before it stopped and she lay quiet for a while. Then it came again. This time it hit her hard, shaking her violently.
Red held her through it, rubbing her arms and back, moving his legs against hers and tucking her icy feet on top of his. Her teeth rattled until he was afraid they might break. Her body vibrated wildly. He massaged her and called softly. After turbulent minutes that seemed to stretch out for hours, the shivering eased. Red looked down at his precious wife and saw her brown eyes flicker open. He wasn’t sure if she was awake or not. Her eyelids closed heavily.
“Wake up, honey,” Red crooned. “C’mon, Cass. Come all the way back to me.”
She shifted against him and her arms went around his waist. Her fingers were like icicles on his back and he pulled her hands around and tucked them between their bodies. He pressed her head into the crook of his shoulder, and her nose was so cold he couldn’t control a little jump. He prayed aloud, hoping she could hear and draw comfort from his words.
The shivering started again. It lasted longer this time. The wracking seemed like it would tear her apart. How much could Cassie or the baby take? When this bout passed, Red looked down, hoping for another glimpse of her eyes. She was awake and staring at him.
“I’m here, Cass. I’m so sorry I wasn’t here sooner. But I’m here now. You’re going to be okay.” Red prayed it was true.
“Wade came. I hid from him.”
“You did good.” Red hugged her close. “He didn’t find you.”
Cassie slid her hands down to lie on her stomach. “I tried to take care of her.” Her voice broke and tears filled her eyes. “I tried.”
“Did he hurt you, Cass honey?” Red didn’t think Wade had gotten his hands on Cassie. If he had, she wouldn’t be here.
Cassie shook her head. “No. No, he never found me. I was so afraid. But then ... I wasn’t afraid anymore, just tired. ‘The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?’”
The shivering resumed. This time it wasn’t as hard or long.
Red cradled her and praised her and stroked her cold body back to warmth. She tried to fall asleep, but Red didn’t let up on her until he was sure she was warm again.
When the shivers receded for good, he finally let her sleep. He left her to warm the cabin up then lay back down beside her, pulled her into his arms, and held her, so relieved he couldn’t stop the tears. So in love with her he was afraid to feel the force of it.
Then he thought of Wade, and the anger slammed into him like a freight train.
Red recognized that temper that went with his red hair. He controlled it pretty well, but at that moment he was overcome. He held his wife and his babe and he wanted to stay this close to both of them forever. But, almost as much, he wanted to get his hands on Wade Sawyer and tear him apart.
The fury consumed him as he lay beside Cassie’s limp, sleeping body. He imagined himself hunting Wade down and thrashing him to within an inch of his life. He savored the vision. He reveled in the power of his hate. Ideas for Wade’s slow, lingering death paraded across his mind, and carefully avoiding thoughts of God, he planned how he’d make Wade pay.
Just as he was mentally meting out Wade’s final punishment with his bare hands, Red got a message from God he couldn’t ignore. He got kicked in the stomach.
With a jolt, Red realized it was the first time he’d felt the babe move since he’d found Cassie in that icy little cave. He’d been so worried about both of them, but Cassie had taken precedence. The little kick told him his child was all right, too. It was as if his rational mind returned to him.
Red had a sense then of Satan sitting on his shoulder, suggesting ways to hurt Wade. Urging vengeance. Calling it justice when it really was hate. Red knew the devil well enough. He’d had temptations before. One of them was lying asleep in his arms right now. Red also knew his Master’s voice, even when it came in the form of a swift kick.
He banished Satan by replacing him with love. Pulling back from Cassie just a bit, he laid one big hand over the little tyke and got kicked again. Red smiled down at Cassie’s oversized belly. The babe was stirring so vigorously Red could see Cassie’s flannel nightgown move. Red got the message.
He whispered, “I’m sorry, little one. You don’t need a pa with a mean temper, do you?”
The babe kicked him squarely in the middle of his hand, and Red took that for a no.
“But what are we going to do? How am I going to protect you and your ma from him?” Red asked it of the babe, but the answer came from God.
“The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?”
Who indeed. Not Wade Sawyer.
Easy to say.
“Greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.”
Wade was in the world, and today, although it had been a close thing, God had protected Cassie. They were safe.
“If God be for us, who can be against us?”
Well, Wade was definitely against them. But who was Wade compared to God? Red almost sat up in bed when he remembered falling practically on top of Cassie. Thinking about it now, he wasn’t sure why he’d stumbled. He’d been walking carefully, holding on to the wall. Yet he’d fallen and his hand had landed on the tiny bit of Cassie’s skirt sticking out of the hole.
Red smiled. God was definitely for them.
Then he thought, “Love thy neighbour as thyself.”
That one stuck in Red’s throat and his smile faded.
The babe kicked him.
Red hesitated and Satan whispered about justice and hate.
The babe kicked him again.
“Okay, little one,” Red whispered so Cassie wouldn’t be disturbed. “But Wade doesn’t make it easy.”
The babe booted him hard.
Red had to forgive Wade. It grated on him something fierce, but he knew he had to. He pulled Cassie back into his arms, and the babe seemed to do a somersault of approval. Red grinned, and Cassie shifted against him and moaned sweetly in her sleep.
Forgiving didn’t mean trusting someone who wasn’t repentant. But Wade was in worse trouble than the Dawsons. Red closed his eyes.
Thank You, God, for the miracle of life I’m holding in my arms. The miracle of two lives. Bless Wade. Bring light to the darkness that surrounds him. I love him, Lord. I do. He is Your creation. And I forgive him. But I hope You’ll forgive me, Lord, if it’s a sin that I’m not going to trust him.
He caught himself just as he dozed off. He had left Buck bridled and saddled, running loose. His home had been trashed and he still had evening chores to do.
With a quick check of Cassie’s fingers and toes, which looked pink and plump now, Red got up and did his chores at a run. Then he quickly straightened the house, built up the fire, and hung Cassie’s wet things to dry. When he got back to Cassie, she had rolled all the way to his side of the bed as if she were hunting for him to snuggle up against. He shucked his clothes again and crawled right back into bed with her.
; Cassie had said, “The Lord is my light and my salvation.” Did she mean it? Had Cassie really made her own commitment to the Lord?
Red prayed she’d moved beyond just saying what he wanted to hear. He prayed for her and thanked God for her every second he had ... until he fell asleep.
CHAPTER 20
Cassie’s eyes fluttered open and she rubbed her hand over Red’s chest and savored the warmth.
Warmth!
She jerked to a sitting position in bed with a cry of fear and fell back because she was anchored by Red’s arm.
“Don’t be afraid, Cass. You’re okay.” Red untangled her hair from around his arm and behind his head.
Cassie looked at Red and started to remember what had happened after she’d gone into that dark little hole to hide from Wade. She looked into his kind, worried eyes, and with a little cry of anguish, she threw herself back into his arms.
He cradled her and crooned and stroked her arms.
She remembered this from last night. It was so fuzzy she wasn’t sure what had happened and what she had dreamed. “You came for me. You saved me.” She clung to him and shuddered from fear.
“You’re okay,” he murmured. “We got through it.”
Red brushed her hair back off her forehead and chucked her under the chin so she’d lift her head from where it was burrowed against his chest. “You were so smart, Cass honey. So brave and strong. You saved yourself. I’m so proud of you.”
Confusion warred with doubt. She shook her head slightly. “No. I was so afraid. I was such a coward. Running and hiding like a stupid—”
“Cass honey,” Red interrupted softly.
“Yes, Red?” Her eyes flickered to his lips and back to his eyes.
“Shut up.” Red kissed her.
It worked. She shut up.
Then he pulled away from her. His lips were moist from her kisses. She knew because she couldn’t quit glancing at them to see if he might be going to kiss her again.
He rested his hands on her shoulders and firmly moved her back from him. He had to unwind her arms from around his neck, and while he did, Cassie sneaked in another kiss and he put up with it for a while. Quite a while. Then after a minute or two ... or three, he went back to holding her away.
“Now, listen, young lady...”
He sounded like a scolding father, and because that was so unlike Red, whom she didn’t think of as a father at all, she smiled. He tapped her under her chin again, and she realized she was looking at his lips. He seemed to want her to stop that. She really tried.
“I’m listening,” she said demurely, trying to follow whatever order he was obviously getting ready to give.
“You were not stupid and you were not a coward,” he said sternly.
“But I was, Red. You don’t know. I was so afraid.”
“Being afraid doesn’t make you a coward, Cass. In this case, being afraid is just plain good sense.”
“But I ran. I hid like some wild animal in a hole in the ground. I should have ... have shot him or something.”
“Well, the only trouble with shooting someone is that once you’ve done it...” Red hesitated.
“What?” Cassie asked.
“Once you’ve shot someone, then ... well, the thing is ... then you’ve ... you’ve shot someone, if you get what I mean.”
Cassie shook her head, feeling stupid again.
“It’s not something you can take back.”
Cassie stared at him and slowly nodded her head. She was glad she wasn’t living with that on her conscience. But she’d still been so helpless. She’d been alone in that black hole with her terror, so completely at Wade’s mercy. She’d felt so weak and pathetic.
There’d been so many times in her life she’d wanted to fight back, not just against Wade, and she always was left cowering in fear. Red had said she was smart and strong and brave. She was none of those things. But a husband’s word was law, so she let herself enjoy the thought.
“What are we going to do, Red?”
“I don’t know, Cass honey. I’ve been thinking about it ever since I found you. I can’t ride off and leave you here alone again, not for even a minute.”
“Could I ride with you to check the cattle?”
Red was silent for a moment.
Cassie hastened to embroider details on her plan. “I could ride with you on Buck. When you find a herd you need to work with, you could set me down somewhere out of the way but where we could see each other.”
“It’s so cold,” Red said doubtfully.
“It’s cold for you, too.”
“I’m not carrying a growing babe.”
“I’ve got a good coat.”
“It could work. It’s better than the plan I came up with.”
“What was that?” Cassie was prepared to do whatever he said.
“Well, I had this picture in my head of building a corral around the cabin and turning Harriet loose in it.”
“A guard pig?”
Cassie looked at him for a long moment, and then he grinned at her and she started to giggle. She buried her head against his chest and he held her close, and they laughed until the baby kicked them into getting up.
“You can come with me for today. We’ll try it a day at a time,” Red said as he grabbed Cassie’s dry clothes for her then proceeded to get dressed.
“Yes, Red.” Red had his back politely turned, so Cassie quickly slipped out of her nightgown and into her chemise, then grabbed for her dress.
“And I’ll show you a better cranny to hide in that’s not so cold, and we’ll put the buffalo robe in it if I ever go off even for a second.”
“Yes, Red.”
He glanced over his shoulder to give her a disgruntled look, and she wondered what she’d done. She thought with the tiniest spark of annoyance that she really could hardly be any more obedient.
Red’s expression cleared. “How did you sneak into the passage without Wade catching you?”
“I saw a flash of light high up on the hill. It scared me. I just grabbed the rifle and went straight in. I’d been in there quite a while before he came.”
Red was silent for a long while. “I think you were scared because God was warning you.”
“You do?” Cassie asked in wonder. If God had talked to her, it was her very own miracle.
“I came in early from checking the cattle because I couldn’t shake off worrying about you. I think God was speaking to me, too,” Red said with calm assurance.
“He took care of us,” Cassie whispered. She knew it was true, because the fear she’d felt at that little flash of light went beyond a normal reaction.
Red said quietly, “Let’s remember to always trust our instincts. God is watching over us, and if we’re open to His leading, I think we’ll be safe.”
“Yes, Red. I will, Red,” she said fervently.
Red looked annoyed again and she stood quietly waiting for him to reprimand her, but he never did.
Red shook his head as if to clear it. “I think the babe talked to me last night.”
“The baby and God? All in one day?” Cassie said with what she hoped was well-concealed teasing.
“Yep.” Red slung his arm around her and led her out to the kitchen. “It was quite a day.”
“So what did she say?” Cassie noticed they’d gotten dressed in the same room at the same time. They’d never done that before.
“Well, first off, she said she’s a he.”
“She did not!” Cassie protested.
Red told her a silly story about being scolded with a series of kicks and twists while they made breakfast and did the morning chores together.
“Instead of checking the herd this afternoon, I want to ride to town and tell the sheriff about this.” Red ate his steak at noon, but his stomach did back flips when he thought about Cassie so cold, so near death.
“Yes, Red. That’s a good idea.”
Red hated that obedient tone. But they were going to town regardl
ess of her tone, so it would be stupid to growl about it.
“I doubt the law will step in, but I want a formal complaint so if Wade comes around again, we’ll have some proof that he’s been a problem before.”
Cassie began cleaning as if he’d shouted at her to hurry. Red shook his head at his submissive little wife then hurried to do a few chores. They rode to town, and though the town marshal didn’t sound like he planned to pursue the matter, Red insisted on going through the motions.
Since it wasn’t a Saturday, they went to pick up a few things at the general store, planning to rush home.
Muriel insisted on hearing the whole story of Cassie’s plight. “Humph. That marshal is bought and paid for by the Sawyers. He won’t do a thing.”
“Well, there’s not much he can do, really. All Wade did was walk around in our house a might clumsily, broke a few things. And no one saw his face, though Cassie identified his voice. If Wade could be found and forced to admit he was there, he’d just say Cassie should have come on out. He had no idea of harming her.” Red’s chest hurt when he thought of the way his cabin had looked. The violence in the damage. The strength of the fear God had placed on Cassie’s heart.
Muriel snorted.
A group of Sawyer hands came into the store just then.
“You know Wade was out at the Dawson place today?” Muriel asked.
The closest man, Red knew he was the Sawyer foreman, shook his head. “He’s quit the country. I saw him get on the stage to Denver myself.”
“He’s not in Denver.” Red stepped in front of Muriel, not wanting the feisty woman to draw down the ire of the Sawyer bunch on her. “I recognized his tracks and Cassie heard him. She hid because she knew he was up to no good. Where is he?”
The burly cowhand scratched his grizzled chin. “We haven’t seen him for a while or more. Him and his pa had it out, and Wade took off. The boy had a pair of black eyes and a split lip when he left. His pa don’t put up with mouth offa his kid, and Wade had used up all his chances.”
Red inhaled slowly as he thought of a father who’d hurt his son like that. He stared at the man, looking for shifty eyes. But the man seemed to believe what he’d said about Wade being gone. All that meant was Wade had lied to them, too.
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