Tattered on My Sleeve

by Autumn Jones Lake

  She straightened her nightie and gave Rock a peck on the cheek. “Can I dance tonight?”

  “Sure, darlin’. I’ll make sure you’re on the list.”

  “Thanks, Rock,” she squealed.

  I turned away while he fixed himself up.

  As the girl walked past me, she paused and brushed her hand over my arm. “What’s your name, big guy? I’ll wear you down eventually.”

  Doubtful.

  “Honey, that’s Wrath. He’s a scary-ass motherfucker. You’re best off looking elsewhere,” Rock joked.

  “Well, Wrath, I’m Ginger, and I hope to see you again real soon.” Bold little bitch. Normally that turned me on. Today it irritated the fuck out of me. She fluttered her lashes and strutted out the door.

  Whatthefuckever.

  Feeling… shitty about the scene that just went down, I decided to needle Rock. “She’ll make a great ol’ lady.”

  He stared at me before waving a hand in the air, dismissing the idea. “Fuck that. I ever meet a bitch that doesn’t drop her panties at the snap of my fingers—maybe.”

  “Good luck with that. Is there a chick in this joint you haven’t bent over your desk?”

  “One or two. What are you so pissy about? Thought a long ride woulda fixed your attitude.”

  Dick. “Why is Trinity at the house?”

  He cocked his head and narrowed his eyes. “She needed a place to stay.”

  Same thing she said. What’d they do, rehearse this shit? “I don’t want her there.”

  “You with her?” he asked.

  “We were starting something. Can’t do that if she’s fucking brothers.”

  “She’s there to cook and clean, asshole.”

  “Bullshit.”

  He sighed and dropped into the chair behind his desk. “I ain’t running this MC the way it was before, so knock your bullshit off.” He flicked his hand at the door. “Go fuckin’ talk to her.”

  The last night at the old MC, we threw a huge party. It was the first official party I put together for the Lost Kings.

  I hadn’t seen Wrath in a couple days. Not since he threw a bunch of shitty accusations at me and stormed out of the new clubhouse.

  It didn’t stop me from looking for him every couple minutes.

  Since it was right next door, dancers from Crystal Ball filtered in and out all night. Most of them were fine. A few catty bitches were downright rude to me.

  One petite, curvy brunette—who introduced herself as Ginger—caught my attention by asking about Wrath.

  “Haven’t seen him yet.”

  It was killing me not to ask how she knew him.

  “What’s your name? Are you a dancer too?” she asked me.

  Going around insulting the MC’s strippers would be a good way to get myself kicked out. Good thing I caught the Fuck no on the tip of my tongue just in time. “Trinity. No, I… um take care of the clubhouse.”

  Her eyes went saucer wide at my name. “Oh yeah, Wrath was saying the other day how he wanted you out of the house. That sucks.”

  The words were almost sympathetic but her smug face was anything but. My breath caught, burning the back of my throat. He asked Rock to kick me out? Even worse, he asked Rock to throw me out in front of this skank?

  Embarrassment heated my skin and made me want to throw up.

  Of course, that’s when Wrath walked in. His eyes swept the room, finally landing on Ginger and me. His mouth twisted and he turned away.

  I felt like the worthless trash I’d been called so many times before.

  I needed to get away.

  “Hey, Trinity.” I glanced up to see Marcel, the prospect the guys had started calling Teller. By this point, I’d heard two stories about how he’d earned his road name. One involved fucking a girl who worked in a bank. The other involved him doling out advice chicks didn’t like to hear. In the short time I’d known him, he’d been a sweetheart, so I didn’t know which story to believe.

  “Hey, cutie, anyone break you in yet?” Ginger asked, running her hand over his arm.

  He flashed a tight smile at her, then turned to me. “Let me know if you need a ride home,” he said before one of the brothers called him away.

  “That’s what you need to do. Get tight with one of the prospects so he’ll patch you right away,” Ginger informed me. I almost laughed in her face. That so wasn’t how it worked.

  Sick panic threatened to leave me blubbering on the floor. The guys were getting drunker and raunchier by the minute. The whole scene brought back a lot of unpleasant memories. This had been a mistake. I had to be out of my mind to get involved with an MC again.

  Pushing through the crowd, I found Rock in a clinch with some skanky blonde who’d followed him over from Crystal Ball earlier. Looking away, I cleared my throat. Instantly, he pushed her back and straightened up.

  “What’s up, Trin?”

  “Would you mind if I head up to the clubhouse? I’m not feeling so hot.” That was an understatement. Between Ginger, Wrath and the ever-growing crowd, I was nearing a meltdown.

  “Of course not. You need someone to drive you?”

  “Nope, I have the Jeep.”

  The blonde kept staring daggers at me, and I realized I’d taken up enough of their time.

  “Thanks, prez. I’ll be back down tomorrow morning to help out.”

  He reached up and grabbed my hand, giving me a gentle squeeze that oddly calmed me. “Nah, stay up there and chill.”

  Pushing my way back into the kitchen made me antsy to get out of there. Someone grabbed my arm and I let out a short scream. My anxiety had reached red-zone levels.

  “Trinity, where you going?” Wrath rumbled.

  “Home. Sorry you couldn’t talk Rock into kicking me out,” I snapped.

  My throat closed as I choked back a sob. Blinking back tears, I straightened up and met his confused gaze. He glanced in Rock’s direction. “Who told you that?”

  As if she’d heard my thoughts, Ginger appeared at Wrath’s side. I nodded to her. “Your girl, Ginger told me all about it.”

  Ginger grinned. I bit my lip, on the verge of tears and stormed away. No fucking way would I cry in front of him. And I sure as fuck wasn’t crying in front of her. I just had to hold on to these tears until I got to my car.

  Everything around me was a blur, and I stumbled into more than one person on my way to the kitchen. Teller was in there by himself, a giant black trash bag in each hand.

  He looked up and smiled. “Hey, Trinity. You leaving?”

  His simple greeting and smile eased some of my panic. “Yeah, I’ve had my fill of bitchy dancers.” I huffed out a laugh and rolled my eyes.

  “Yeah, hopefully none of them will find their way out to the new clubhouse.”

  I arched a brow at that. “Thought having a houseful of strippers would be a dream come true for a young stud.”

  He grinned even broader. “Nah. It gets old quick.”

  “Wow, first guy I’ve heard say that.”

  He shrugged. “You know the wrong guys then.”

  “Guess so.”

  “Need a ride?”

  “Nope. Got the Jeep.” I couldn’t call it mine yet. Still felt too weird that the club had given me a car. Well, technically, the other prospect, Blake, had been restoring an old Jeep the club had rotting in the backyard. When he finished, Rock turned it over to me.

  “Well, at least let me walk you out,” he offered. He held up the trash bags. “Got stuck with garbage duty tonight.”

  I chuckled. If that was the worst thing the Lost Kings did to their prospects, Teller was lucky.

  We said good night by my car.

  “Drive safe, Trinity.”

  At least by the time I got on the road, I didn’t feel like crying anymore.

  Trinity’s anger made no sense to me. I didn’t hide the fact that I wanted her out of the clubhouse.

  “Come on, big guy. Show me your room,” Ginger shouted at me.

  “Later
.” I brushed her off and went looking for Trinity.

  I ran into one of our guys from our downstate charter. “Hey did you see a blonde go by?”

  He shook his head, but before I could give him a more specific description, Ginger latched on to me. “Why are you looking for that girl? I’ll take care of you.”

  Jesus Christ, the bitch wouldn’t quit. “I need to talk to her. I’ll catch you later.”

  “She got a ride from one of your prospects.” She wiggled her eyebrows as she said it.

  “What?” She shrugged and I wanted to throttle her.

  “I dunno. Come on, show me what you can do.”

  “Not tonight.” I finally brushed her off for good. She bitched and moaned as I stomped off to my room, but I really didn’t give two fucks. Sure, fucking Ginger would have given me a perverse sense of getting even with Trinity—as sick as that was—but I didn’t have it in me that night.

  A week later, we’d all moved into the new center. At church, we voted Teller in as a patched member. He’d earned his three-piece patch by being reliable and loyal. Did plenty of bitch work without complaint. Most importantly, he’d had our backs when the club went through the change in leadership.

  In another year or two, we’d vote his best friend, Blake, in. He was two years younger than Teller but hardworking, smart and knew a lot about not only bikes but cars too. Also one hell of a fighter.

  Surprisingly, I hadn’t seen much of Trinity all week. I wasn’t even sure where she was staying. Asking Rock was as pointless as asking an actual rock, so that was a dead end.

  After church, I spotted her leaving the kitchen and followed her like some creepy, lovesick teenager. She ducked into the room across from the gym. Duh, why hadn’t I thought of that before? I remembered the little suite tucked away down here. Made perfect sense. Before I knew what I was doing, I raised my hand and knocked.

  She took her time answering, and when the door finally swung open, her face didn’t exactly light up at the sight of me.

  “Hey, I was wondering where you’ve been hiding. This your room?”

  Her jaw tightened and she slipped out, closing the door behind her. “Yes.”

  “Can I see what you’ve done with it?”

  “No.”

  Stunned, I took a step back. She folded her arms over her chest. “Rock said it’s my space and I don’t have to let any of the brothers in there if I don’t want to.”

  “So who’s been lucky enough to see it so far?” I kept my tone light, but inside, I dreaded her answer.

  She flinched and the corners of her mouth turned down. “No one.”

  Huh.

  Before I had a chance to ask if I could see it, she craned her neck, and swept her gaze up and down the hallway. “Where’s your little muffler bunny?”

  “Who?”

  “I should’ve known. Got so many you can’t keep track, right?”

  What the actual fuck? By her narrowed eyes and crossed arms, it was obvious she was serious. Seriously pissed.

  “Trinity—”

  “Hey, Trinity, got a sec?”

  Motherfucking Rock and his shitty timing.

  Trin’s face lit up when she saw him. “Sure, prez, what’d you need?” she asked with a genuine smile.

  Fuck this.

  After the guys left church, I scurried out of the kitchen and back into my room. I still didn’t feel quite safe when all the brothers were in the house at once. Everyone was surprisingly nice, but I knew from experience how people you trusted could turn on you, so I wasn’t about to let my guard down.

  I tried ignoring the knock at my door, but whoever it was wouldn’t go away.

  Finding Wrath on the other side shocked me.

  Thank God, Rock interrupted us. I couldn’t argue with Wrath again. If he had his way, he would have booted me back down to Empire where I’d live in fear of being found by Tyler or one of his minions.

  Rock had a big grin on his face, until Wrath bumped his shoulder and stormed off. Shaking his head, Rock focused on me. “He giving you shit?”

  “Nah, we’re whatever. Don’t worry about it. What’s up?”

  He didn’t seem satisfied with my words, but didn’t question me either. “We patched Marcel in finally. Think you can organize something for him on Friday?” He handed me a credit card. “Get whatever you need, okay?”

  I met his eyes briefly. “Okay.”

  “You know what to get?”

  “Alcohol and condoms?”

  Rock snorted and shook his head. “Yeah, pretty much. Should I ask any of the CB girls to come up for him?”

  I remembered my conversation with Teller the night we said good-bye to the old clubhouse. “Nah, I don’t think he’d care for that. He doesn’t seem that into them.”

  He chuckled and ran his hand over the back of his neck. “Can’t blame him. They give me a fuckin’ headache sometimes.”

  “Doesn’t stop you from nailing them though, does it, prez?” I asked with a laugh.

  He shook his head, looking almost embarrassed. “No, it doesn’t.”

  Crap, how could I insult Rock so brazenly after he’d taken me in, protected me, and given me shelter?

  “Shit, prez, I’m sorry. That was rude.”

  A corner of his mouth lifted. “No worries, Trin. Let me know if you need anything else, yeah?”

  Excited about Marcel’s party, I sat at my desk and scribbled down a list of supplies. I’d finally get to put that fancy, industrial kitchen to good use.

  Cake. I hadn’t baked in forever, but I enjoyed it when I had the money for ingredients and someone to do it for. Now I had a houseful of hungry bikers to feed.

  Rumor had it Wrath was making a run to our downstate charter right after church, which was why I’d been so surprised to find him at my door. Would he make it back for Teller’s party?

  Do I care?

  Sure enough, the rumble of his bike reached my ears as it left the clubhouse grounds.

  Yeah, I care. I knew which motorcycle belonged to Wrath by the sound alone. How pathetic.

  Shoving Wrath out of my mind would take a lot of effort. To distract myself, I hustled down to the kitchen and took stock of what we had on hand.

  I wasn’t in there long before Teller strolled in with a huge grin on his face, proudly sporting his new cut.

  “Didn’t they rub any dirt on your patches?” I teased.

  He grinned big and goofy at me. “You heard already?”

  “Sure did. Congrats.” I gave him a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. “Gonna celebrate Friday. Got any special requests?”

  “You?”

  It took a second for his meaning to sink in. “I, uh—”

  He blushed and glanced at the door. “Never mind. I thought now…” He ran his hands over his cut. “You’re not with anyone, right?”

  “No. Not really. No.”

  His gaze roamed over me for a brief second. “I should get going. I gotta pick up my sister.”

  “Okay.”

  “I’ll catch you later, Trin.”

  Friday came quick. I had a mild freak out that I wouldn’t have everything ready in time. Ginger, of all people, showed up early to help me out. I had no reason to hate her fucking guts, but I did. I worked hard to be civil to her because it wasn’t her fault and I really needed her help that afternoon.

  Wrath showed up shortly after, and it made a whole lot more sense why Ginger was here to “help.”

  “Hey, baby!” she squealed, rushing to his side. Wrath caught me rolling my eyes and smirked. My heart plummeted and bile rose from my stomach as she reached up to give him a welcome home kiss.

  That should have been my job.

  Instead, I was standing in front of a hot oven, covered in flour, batter, and Betty Crocker only knew what else.

  Like an idiot, I sighed with relief when Wrath nudged Ginger aside. “Whatcha making, Trin?” he asked, edging closer. It was utterly pathetic how happy his interest made me.

 
; “Cake for Teller’s patch party,” I answered proudly, then cursed myself for sounding so perky.

  His mouth turned down as he took in all my party preparations. “You do all this for him?”

  I shrugged, unsure of the right answer. “Well, yeah. Rock asked me to put something together—”

  “Motherfucker,” he swore under his breath. At his sides, his hands curled into fists.

  Ginger had apparently reached her limit of being ignored. She rushed over and grabbed for Wrath’s hand.

  “Not now. I gotta talk to prez. I’ll catch you later.”

  Based on some tips from Teller’s best friend Blake, I chose to make a triple layer chocolate cake with marshmallow frosting. Messy but worth it, judging from the way the guys demolished the entire thing within minutes.

  Warm breath on the back of my neck startled me as I set the remnants on the bar top.

  My heart actually skipped.

  Wrath.

  But then two hands that were definitely not Wrath’s circled my upper arms.

  “Got any of that frosting left?” Teller whispered in my ear.

  His lips against my skin tickled, and I giggled. “No, why?”

  “I wanted to smear it all over you and lick it off.” His lowered voice and the slow way he dropped each word set off a shivery sensation over my skin. I twisted around to face him.

  Holy fuck.

  Mixing food and sex never interested me much, but the fierce expression he wore actually turned me on and made me reconsider.

  He wanted me. Bad.

  The familiar need to feel wanted by someone consumed me.

  Over Teller’s shoulder, I caught sight of who I wanted—Wrath. The crowd shifted and I spotted Ginger glued to his side.

  I moved my gaze back to Teller’s hungry eyes. “Next time I’ll save some just for you.”

  One corner of his mouth lifted in a cocky smirk I’d never seen on Teller before. It was sexy on him. “I wanna show you my new room, babe.”

  A voice in my head whispered I better get this over with. And at least Teller had always been nice to me. “Okay.”

  He grabbed my hand and pulled me toward the stairs. We had to pass Wrath and Ginger to get there. My gaze collided with Wrath’s and held. I willed him to say something. Anything to stop me from going through with the inevitable. Because I knew what would happen when I stepped inside Teller’s room. I also knew once I slept with Teller, Wrath and I would be done for good.