“Humanity is a choice,” I say. “My choice. Mother has always taken control when this happens, but whether I continue to sacrifice my life for Humanity – that’s my choice. I control their fate. And right now, I have no idea if they deserve it.”
My Gemini don’t respond because, how can they? What could they possibly say to talk me down off this ledge?
For the first time, silence is deafening.
Despair consumes me. Joy that once filled me at giving life to humans is replaced with contempt. Condemnation. Fighting my derision for Humanity at this moment is testing my final resolve, and I know now it’s a decision I need to make. Really make. One I can’t make lightly and can’t make right now while I’m filled with indignation at Humanity’s part in Nova’s death.
Gaea always gave me an out, I just never considered it before now.
“Is Humanity truly worth saving?” I ask again. “I just don’t know anymore,” I say honestly. “I just don’t know.”
I look at Titus, Cas and Zander as they stand there, shock on their faces.
Fear in their hearts.
“I can’t stay here any longer,” I whisper. “Take me home.”
Days pass as I lie alone in my bed, feeling her growing in my belly – the reincarnation of my soul.
The baby seems to be growing bigger this pregnancy. Or faster? I can’t tell which. Or perhaps I’m just making it all up because I’m ready to get this life over with.
All I really want is to forget my daughter is dead… if only for a little while.
The baby’s body is just an empty shell now, but when the Phoenix Cycle is complete, just a few short weeks from now, I’ll die. I’ll go into labor and deliver the child, then I, the mother, will die and my soul will transcend from this body to the one growing inside me.
Outside my chamber door, I overhear the conversations between my Gemini. Their concern for me grows stronger every day. My concern for them grows, too. Especially Zander. He has no idea what’s to come.
He’s never known a world where I don’t exist.
Clearing my head, I reach out to their minds and eavesdrop to find out what’s happening while I lie here, locked away in my chamber until I feel like rejoining the living.
There’s dissention between them, especially Titus and Zander. Thankfully, Cas is trying to talk some sense into them. I only hope Titus isn’t too stubborn to listen.
I feel a pang of guilt for Titus. Perhaps I’ve been too hard on him through all this. After all, Nova was his child too. They never had a traditional parent-child relationship like mortals do, but he loved for her. Doted on her as a child. And after she passed, he tried to mourn with me. I just didn’t know how to do that.
While I’m gone for the next twenty-one years, Titus steps in, taking charge of all things Eternal. In other incarnations, Nova would assist him. This time, however, he’s on his own. I hope he’s ready. Fortunately, Cas is here. He’ll have to step up more, do less travelling on missions and more administrative stuff with the council.
Time moves faster in Aravot because time is a human notion. There’s no true measure of time here like there is in Jagat, but a mortal year feels much, which is why Titus always preferred to stay in Aravot as much as possible while I grow up, far away from them.
The most difficult part, however, is neither Titus nor any of my Gemini can be in contact with me until I turn 21. The point is when we finally reunite, I fall in love with no coercion.
Unconditionally.
My ability to reconnect with them is a testament to our family mantra – lead with love. As soul mates, the belief is that regardless of what’s going on in Jagat, my soul will recognize them as mine, and I’ll choose, choose my role as Eternal Mother responsible for all of Humanity over any selfish wants or dreams.
The most difficult part being raised in Jagat, raised like a human. Truth be told, that realm is a train wreck. Humanity is killing itself, and I’ve no clue how to fix any of it. As Eternal Mother, however, it’s not my job to fix them. Only to protect them.
Ending Humanity isn’t really protecting them, though.
Is it?
Let’s say the Tree runs out of souls. Pure souls will die and transcend to the Summerlands, and evil souls will be banished to the Shadowlands. End of story.
Or so we believe.
Truth is, we’ve no idea what would really happen should I give up this gig, and that’s the most frightening part of all.
Control, or lack thereof, is my greatest fear. But then, as Gabrielle likes to continuously point out, complete control is something that never belonged to me anyway.
Free will is paramount.
Life is about choice, like when I chose to stay with Titus and Nova. I gave up a certain amount of control then, of Humanity. If I wanted free will, I had no choice but to give them that choice, too.
Nature is a balancing act: Light and Dark. Good and Bad. Summer and Shadows.
Balance.
Life is about learning lessons that evolve our souls. I was taught this the day I gave birth to Nova. Was reminded the day Gaea gave her immortality. Learned it the day she died in my arms.
“So, what’s the lesson this time?” I ask Mother, knowing she won’t respond.
I turn over and stare out the glass doors that overlook Aravot and the Infinity Pool. Viveka stands tall in the distance.
I may be Eternal Mother, but I’m also a child. I’ve been looking at this like a grieving mother, not a daughter. Not as a child being taught a lesson from the Universe. Perhaps this is a lesson that could be useful.
My gaze wanders to Journey’s corner. At the undisturbed pile of purple ash sitting there. Journey will return. Nova won’t.
There’s no lesson in that.
Sick of lying here, I finally drag myself up and move to sit on the edge of the bed. My body is stiff, having lain here for who knows how long. My Gemini have been in and out, but I’ve pushed them away, too.
There are times I just need to be alone… it’s one of the curses of having intelligence as my super power. Losing myself in thought comes much too often for my family’s liking, but it heals me. Keeps me grounded and focused, so they just have to deal with it.
Our apartment is empty now. My Gemini are out at the Great Hall, or in Jagat, preparing for my departure or – I don’t know.
Perhaps they’ve given up on me, too.
My piano sits in the corner of my adjoining study, calling to me. It’s the first of its kind, actually. Raz and Titus built it for me, and after bringing it to Jagat during my second incarnation, someone took specs of it, and the piano was born.
Music heals me. It’s as much a part of my being as my family. When an instrument came available in Jagat, Titus found it and gifted it to me. It’s kind of become a running joke in the family, seeing who finds the instruments first.
Rising from my bed, I reach high above me, stretching my muscles, feeling my bones crack, one at a time, until I’ve worked out all the kinks. My body is that of a 23-year old, never having aged beyond that, but my mind is archaic.
Cas says timeless, but that may be reaching.
The piano calls to me, begging to be played. I miss it. It’s been a long time since I’ve had down time to play. Taking a breath, I walk over to the instrument, pull out the bench, and sit, moving back the cover that hides the ivory keys.
I set my fingers down, right hand then left, and begin to play. As the notes echo through the apartment, memories of playing beside Nova just a few short weeks ago enter my thoughts. She was so happy, playing one instrument while I played another.
“I’m so sorry, sweet girl.” The words leave my mouth as I continue to play melancholy notes. Distraught yet determined, I continue. Hoping if she’s out there somewhere, perhaps even in the Tree of Souls, waiting to be reborn, that she’ll hear me.
Miracles can happen, my experience can attest to that. So while my brain says she’s gone, my instincts and my heart still hold hope that somed
ay, somehow, I’ll see my daughter again.
Notes come from the instrument as my fingers play wildly and my mind drifts somewhere else, somewhere far away, a place I don’t recognize.
A voice echoes in my mind and my eyes fall shut as my head begins to pound – a sign a vision is coming.
The Universe or maybe even my mother speaks to me through visions. Sometimes they’re visions of the future, sometimes they’re things from the past, moments I may have missed. Generally, my head only hurts for a moment. When I’m human, however, they hurt like hell until I learn to control them.
Focus is key — it rids me of the pain as I center on the visions and the message the Universe is trying to send. This time, given what’s going on, there’s no room for error. Every message needs my complete attention.
I stop playing and close my eyes tightly as a vision overtakes me…
Incoherent visions with random faces; some I know, some I don’t. Prophecies long forgotten spoken by a voice I’ll never forget. The images imprint in my memory until one face stops, frozen in time. That’s when I know it’s him.
My fourth Gemini. The healer.
A prophesized Genesis healer, one of ancient prophecy who will be key in winning De Bella Aeterna, a great war between the three realms.
My heart is racing as my eyes fly open. I’m hyperventilating, trying to catch my breath.
“Holy hell, it’s all true.” I gasp in disbelief, though how I could have doubted it after all that’s transpired, I don’t know.
Titus, Cas, and Zander come barreling into the room.
“Chayah, what’s wrong?” Titus asks.
“I saw him,” I say. “The newborn Gemini.” I swallow. “He’s the healer.”
Titus’s eyes widen. He’s the only Gemini old enough to remember the prophecy of the healer and the destruction of the Tree, though Cas could also, since he spends most of his time researching with Raz.
“What does that mean?” Zander is confused. Honestly, so am I.
“It means the Aeterna Prophecy is coming to light,” Cas says. Guess he knows. “And the Great Eternal War is upon us.”
“The healer must be our weapon,” Titus says. “Our weapon to use against Shadows or whatever weapon Tenebrous has that kills Eternals.”
“Only he was too late to save Nova.” My heart hurts. My soul. Every part of me aches for my lost daughter.
“But we already have the weapon,” Zander says.
“What if that wasn’t really their weapon?” Cas offers.
I don’t even want to know what he’s thinking. Not now. Forcing my eyes open, I push us back from the piano and stand.
Zander stares wide-eyed at my growing belly. He’s not had a good look at me in a while, had to have been a few weeks now given how large my belly has grown.
I peer down, then back up at him. “You’ve never seen me with child.”
“Uh, who’s is it?”
If I wasn’t mourning Nova, I may have laughed at that question. “Mine.”
“Yeah, but who’s the father?”
“She has no father,” I say. “This child is mine, alone. It’s me. Reincarnated?” This has to be strange for him, but my patience is minimal at the moment.
“Okay.” He relents, then leans against the wall, shoving his hands into his pockets.
“I need some air.” I walk over to the balcony, open the glass doors and step outside, taking a seat on the chairs overlooking Viveka. “Talk to me, Gaea. For once. I’m still your daughter, you know. I need my mother too.”
For the first time in weeks, I break down again.
My Gemini come out then, trying to comfort me, but it’s no use. I can’t be comforted.
Not anymore.
The sky is still darker than usual when I peer back out over the balcony. A deep purple hue glows in the sky, appearing like another storm could rain down at any moment.
“Mother.” I inhale a breath, trying desperately to hold back my tears. “My heart is broken. I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to go on without my daughter.” Closing my eyes, I reach out to her. Silently pleading for her to answer. Speak to me, for once. “I don’t ask for much anymore. But now, I need you. Please, Mother. Talk to me.”
A low rumbling echoes throughout Aravot, forcing my eyes open. The darkness looms, clouds begin to gather above the Tree, catching my attention. All our attention.
Beams of sunlight shine down onto Viveka.
“Is that what I think it is?” Cas asks, pointing out into the distance.
“The Mother,” Titus says. “She’s summoning you.”
I stand up then, my eyes and my mind trying to make sense of what I see.
“Go to her,” Cas said. “She’s calling you.”
Nodding mindlessly, I quickly open a portal and disappear to the Tree, hoping they’re right. When I step through, I land at a patch of blooming orchids covering Nova’s grave. I reach down, running my finger against the silky petals.
“Come to the Grotto.” A voice I don’t recognize echoes in my head. I don’t know who’s speaking, but my gut tells me to follow, so I walk as fast as my pregnant self can.
The Eternal Falls are flowing wildly today, thanks to the rain from the last few weeks. Rain that shouldn’t be happening, but I remember hearing you shouldn’t piss off Mother Nature. With a wave of my hands, I temporarily stop the falls, walking beneath them, then they start flowing as soon as I’m past. I use my magic to open the Grotto. The pool has a light amethyst glow emanating today, like lights illuminating it from below.
“I’m here,” I say, my voice echoes through the cavern.
Gabrielle steps out from behind the wall.
“Why all the secrecy?”
“I’m not who I appear to be. Gabrielle was kind enough to lend me her body for a time.” Her eyes are amethyst, a deep and dark like mine, not Gabrielle’s usual crimson color.
“I don’t understand, I…” Stepping closer, I approach the woman who looks like my sister, but… isn’t. If I were human, I’d be in shock. “Mother?”
The woman nods. “Hello, Seraya.”
My hands instinctively cover my mouth and tears flow like the Nile. “Mother.”
She nods, then reaches Her arms around me, pulling me into Her embrace.
I bury myself into Her neck. “I can’t do this. I can’t do this, Mother. Please. Please, make it stop. Make this pain go away.” Rather than answer me, we stand there in silence. The Mother and Her daughter, reuniting after far too long. “Why have you forsaken me? What have I done so wrong to deserve this? I don’t know how to live in a Universe without her.”
“You must keep going. Have faith. This isn’t the end, Seraya. It’s a new beginning.”
“What does that mean?”
“I can’t give you all the answers, child. Those, you must find yourself. But they’re out there. And I swear, I have not forsaken you. You’re my Firstborn daughter. My greatest love. And while I can’t fix this, be assured I’ll always be watching.” She pulls back, staring into my tear-stained eyes. “Nam Aeternum.”
“Why can’t I see you?”
“It’s not time, child. Not yet.”
“How could you let her die? She’s yours, too.”
“My hands are clean of that transgression. There are things in play you must discover in order to turn the tides. I cannot interfere. This is your battle, your Eternal War.” She sets Her palms against my cheeks. “Only you can decide to save Humanity if you so choose. I adore you, but this isn’t my burden to bear. Seek the assistance of your sister. She will be your greatest ally.”
“I’ve already spoken to the EMC. Gabrielle admitted she spoke to you, but she’s refusing to tell me anything more.”
“The EMC isn’t to whom I’m referring.”
“Wait. What?”
“Do not forsake her, Seraya. Blood is the strongest bond.”
“I don’t understand.”
“You will. I need to go now.
I’ve been here too long already.”
“No, please. Mother, please don’t leave me.” I fall to my knees, my arms wrapped tightly around her feet.
“Stand up, child.”
She reaches down and pulls me up to stand. Her gaze focuses on my growing belly, and she grins, laying her hands across it gently. Closing her eyes, she smiles as her hands light up, giving off a beautiful golden glow. A moment later, warmth spreads across my belly as flutters begin to bubble deep inside.
In all my incarnations, I’ve never felt the child move.
“How are you doing that?” I ask, confused at what I’m experiencing.
Mother’s eyes light up as She leaves a kiss to my cheek.
The glow on my ring grows stronger than ever. Amethyst. Then Amber. Then the light fades to nothing.
“You can do this, child.” She wraps her arms around me, pulling me close, holding me so tightly I can hardly breath. “You will do what’s right, you always do. Lead with love, Chayah. You will save your family. All of them.”
“Mother, please.” I beg.
“I adore you, Seraya,” she whispers. “Stay strong.”
Her body goes limp for a moment, Gabrielle now taking over where my mother once was.
Gabrielle pulls back but doesn’t release me, just holds her hands firm to steady me. Stepping back just a few inches now, she stares, wiping the tears from my eyes. “Did you find the answers you seek?”
My body trembles as I shake my head.
“But you know where to find them.”
I nod but try to keep my emotions at bay, to keep from falling apart. “Why can’t you just tell me what’s going on?”
“I can now,” she says.
Lailah and Micah step inside, coming over to stand beside Gabrielle and me. “We’re ready to know as well,” Micah says.
“So, you don’t know either?”
“Not everything.” Lailah admits. “It wasn’t time. Now, it is. It’s also time you understand what your child sacrificed herself for.”
“What?” My eyes go wide. “What the hell are you talking about?”
Gabrielle sets her hands on my shoulders. “Brace yourself, sister. If we’re going to defeat the coming darkness, if we’re going to win the Eternal War, Nova’s sacrifice is only the first of many.”
Realms and Rebels: A Paranormal and Fantasy Reverse Harem Collection Page 132