Fuck. Having her on top of me makes me want to smash my lips against hers and take her to my room so I can fuck her all day long. She’s never been this close, and she’s even prettier than I remember. With her plump pink lips and round eyes, her perky ass, and those petite tits hiding behind a thin piece of cloth, she’s making it so hard on me. Not to mention getting me hard.
I don’t know how long we’ve been lying here, but I don’t care. It’s nice to feel her close to me. To have someone to mess around with and tease, to laugh with and cry with. To make me feel like everything could be okay.
Only now do I notice the leaf planted on top of her head. How ironic.
Without realizing it, my hand has already found its way to her hair, and I take out the leaf and let it fly away. She looks so beautiful when she’s all abashed and fazed. My lips instinctively part, because all I’m thinking about is kissing her. She’s really my Leafy.
Fuck, I’m really falling for her.
Her eyebrows draw together, her expression changing from bewilderment to embarrassment and then frustration. She clenches her jaw and scrambles off me, her face turning cherry red. Sweet. Sexy. Fuck, it’s hot.
But this is so fucking wrong on so many levels. I’m trying to help her, but not like that. If she was with me, she’d be in danger all the time. Not to mention the fact that I have an awful history, no money, and no future. I’m not right for her. This isn’t good.
My smile fades away, just like my hope. I get up and wipe the mud from my pants.
“Jesus, what are you guys doing?”
I look up and see it’s her friend, the girl she often sits with in class.
“Hi!” Leafy says, a little too loud. “Uh … we were just training.”
“Training? For what? The dirty Olympics? You guys look nasty. And sweaty too.” She waves her hand close to her nose.
Well, isn’t she nice. I’ll take it as a compliment. Sweating means we’ve gotten busy, so that’s good. Besides, she probably just can’t handle my exotic manly odors. I like my aftershave strong and spicy. Just like my girls.
I cough. I’m really not in the mood to be scrutinized by someone I don’t even know. “I’m teaching her self-defense, and she helps me with my homework.”
“Oh, really?” the girl says, looking at me like I’m a pervert.
“Yes,” Leafy adds. Glad she’s backing me up, although I hate to come in between her and her friend. I’m not in for busting friendships. “Uh … Look, I’ll see you around, okay?” I say, and I grab my jacket and put it on again.
She says, “Yeah, see ya,” but I’ve already walked away. We’ll continue this some other time, maybe when I’m less horny and can focus more on us staying friends. It’d be for the best, I guess. But it’s hard to keep my distance when I’m so attracted to her. Something tells me we’re heading toward something unavoidable, and neither of us wants to call it quits.
Chapter 17
Too Close to Home
The next day, evening …
I’m standing by the fence, waiting for my client to appear. Wes told me some girl named Jennifer would come pick up some cocaine, and I wrote it down in my notebook to make sure I wouldn’t forget. It’s cold and dark outside, and I’m shivering in my jacket. It almost feels like the bag of cocaine is burning its way through my pants. I just want to get this over with as fast as possible.
When I see a thin woman walking down the street with a kid holding onto her long fingers, I lean away from the fence, trying not to stand out. I don’t want to alarm anyone around here, so I pretend I’m checking my phone while she comes closer.
“Hello,” she suddenly says.
I turn my head and notice she’s looking straight at me. She has hollow cheekbones, pimples and bruises all over her face, and her eyes are red. The kid beneath her, who’s shivering heavily, barely manages to hold onto her bony figure. She just stands there, staring at me, while fiddling in her pocket.
Oh God.
“Are you Jennifer?” I say.
To my horror she nods.
Oh, fuck no.
This is Jennifer? This is the girl I’m supposed to give the cocaine to? A mother?
In shock I stare at her. Images of my mother flash through my mind, and I immediately will them away again.
I sigh loudly, and run both my hands through my hair. Shit. This is way too close to home. What am I supposed to do now? I wasn’t expecting a lady with a fucking kid!
“You have the goods?” she asks, her voice raspy.
“I’m not selling,” I say, and I turn around.
She tugs my jacket, although I barely feel it. Her muscles seem non-existent. She must be emaciated.
“Please.”
I avert my eyes, unable to look her in the eye. That single word she just said can bring a man to his knees.
“I …” I stammer. How can I do this? How can I fucking go through with this? That poor kid …
“I need it,” she says. She holds out a wad of cash, her fingers trembling.
“No, I can’t do it,” I say. I rummage in my pockets, feeling the bag of cocaine weigh down on me.
“Give me the drugs!” she shrieks. I back away, but she keeps coming closer. “I need them!”
“Think about your kid! How could you drag him into this?” I say, feeling guilty though I haven’t even done anything.
“But you are Hunter, right?” The look in her eyes is so desperate, it’s hard to watch.
“Yes, I am, but—”
“Then give me the fucking drugs!” she hisses. “Wes told me you’d give them to me. A deal is a deal.” She looks fucking psychotic; it’s making me think she could murder someone over these drugs.
When I look down at the kid, all I see is fear and innocence, and it pains me to do this, but I know I must. Wes threatened me, and this is his way to make sure I’m not straying from the path. He knew about that kid, and he knew about my past. FUCK!
The gang is really malicious and fucked up. I hate, hate that I need them, but I do. If I do this now, they’ll let me stay. If I fuck it up, I’m out, and I’ll never get my brother back.
Fuck. This is so wrong.
I take out the bag of drugs, rolling it up and down between my fingers. I’m tempted to trade it, but it feels like I’m making the worst mistake in my life. Or rather, in that kid’s life.
Suddenly she leaps forward and snatches it from my hand, throwing the bundle of money at my face.
“Don’t make me fucking wait on my stash,” she snaps, and then she turns around and walks away, dragging the kid along with her.
“Wait!” I yell, and I run after her, burying the money in my pockets.
“What? I’m not giving it back. I paid for it, fair and square.”
“I know.” I go to my knees as the little guy looks up toward me. “Here,” I say. I take off my jacket and drape it over his quivering shoulders.
“We don’t need your help. I can’t pay for that,” Jennifer says.
“It’s free and it’s his now. I’m not letting you go until you promise he can keep it.”
“And what makes you think you can stop me from walking out of here?”
I squint, making a promise with my eyes that I will do what I say.
She sighs. “Fine, whatever. C’mon.” She tugs the kid’s arm.
I watch them walk off into the streets and wait until they’ve disappeared from my view before I get back onto the campus ground. Letting it sink in what I just did, I feel the need to cry. Not because of my situation, but because of that kid. I don’t need to see into their lives to know what he’s going through. I’ve been there.
That was my life I was just looking at.
Leaning against the fence, I slowly sink to the ground and bury my head between my arms. My energy is drained. I feel exhausted and frustrated. My body feels limp and weak. I am weak.
And I’m furious. Alpha Psi did this on purpose, and it’s a fucking low blow. This was part of my punishm
ent. I should’ve known. It’s just so fucking hard to keep this up. I’m not even sure I can do this anymore.
I slam my fist into the ground, bellowing out loud, throwing all my anger into it. I don’t care what happens, but I swear right here, right now, I will take them down. Whatever the cost, I’ll make it happen.
After sitting on the ground for a while, I get up and make my way to the dorm. I have no idea what to do. I can’t get my mind off that trade, that woman, that kid, and it’s ruining me. Of all the times I don’t remember anything, this is the time I can’t forget? It’s eating me up, and I need something to take away the pain. Or someone.
Leafy.
What I need most right now is her. The girl who can take my thoughts and make them disappear. The girl who can help me get through this. The girl I can spend time with and feel like everything’s okay. Even if it’s wrong or selfish, I’ll gladly take it. I don’t care if it makes me a monster; I need her to numb the pain.
I make my way up the stairs and figure out what I’m gonna do. I’m torn between wanting to go to her and spend time with her to forget everything, and choosing what’s better, which is leaving her alone so she doesn’t get involved with this.
But fuck it. I need her more than I need anyone right now.
So I knock on her door and wait until I hear her sweet, soothing voice again.
“Come in!”
I swing the door open immediately. When I see her face my heart stops its erratic beating and starts to finally calm down again. Once I step into her room I feel like I can let everything go. Just seeing her puts a smile on my face. Especially when I notice she’s studying again.
“Do you ever do anything else?” I ask.
“I need to get this done in time,” she says, briefly turning her head to look at me before getting back to her homework.
“Oh, c’mon, you can work me into your schedule.” I walk inside and stand behind her, peering down at her work. It’s neat and organized, just like always. Her pretty handwriting stands out like it’s a wedding invitation or something.
“Sorry, but I don’t have time for sparring today.”
“I’m not talking about sparring.” I lean forward and snatch her book away. I want her attention, and this is the only way I know how to get it.
“Hey!” she hisses like an angry kitty.
“Chill. I’m just putting it away. See?” I gently place the book on her shelf, being extra careful with it. “You really need to relax sometimes.” Actually, we both do. I don’t want to spend my time arguing with her. I just want to have some fun.
“I am relaxed,” she says. Yeah, right.
I put my hands on her shoulders and start massaging her slowly, sensually. It’s hard not to touch her bare skin as I put my fingers on her. Her muscles are all tensed up, and she needs to relax just like I do. Sometimes you just need to do something totally different and exciting. Something to feel alive again.
“See? All tensed up. Can’t be good,” I say. “Tell you what, why don’t we go hang someplace today? Takes your mind off things for a while.”
“But it’s almost evening, I can’t—”
But, but, but. Again. She’s always making up excuses.
“Because it’s evening?” I say jokingly. “C’mon. You gotta give me a better cop-out story than that.”
“I need to get this done.”
She really doesn’t get it. I wonder if she ever goes out. Maybe I should just drag her with me, so she knows what I’m talking about. “Homework can wait. You need to have some fun once in a while.”
“But …”
So many buts. Why? “I’m starting to think you’re just making up excuses so you can avoid having to hang with me. Are you afraid?” I lower my head, hovering over her shoulder, and gaze into her round blue eyes. I love how they light up when I smile.
“No, of course not,” she stammers.
“Do you want me to drag you out of that seat then? And that’s not an empty threat.” I’m really doing it if she doesn’t get up soon. Besides, it’s a good excuse for me to put my hands on her again.
“Oh, all right,” she says.
Finally. “Awesome, let’s go.”
I spin her chair, pull her with me and drag her through the door.
♥♥♥
I take her to the place my brother and I used to go before … well, let’s just say this movie theatre is special to me. It’s where I go to take my mind off things. To relax a little and forget about all the horrors of the outside world. Just letting my mind drift away into a fantasy land created by a movie, that’s the life.
Once we get to the place, I check if the coast is clear.
“We’re going to the movies?” she asks, looking up at the theatre. I nod.
“I can’t pay for that, you know,” she says.
Neither of us have any money to pay for the tickets, so it’ll have to be like always: sneak in and hope we don’t get caught. I always did this with my brother, but I guess she’s not used to going against the law.
“Don’t need cash to have some fun,” I say, and I grab her hand and pull her to a side door. I know this thing is always open, because the employees like to smoke almost every hour.
“What? You want to sneak in?” she says, way too loud.
I place a finger on my lips. She needs to be quiet. “Do you wanna get caught?”
She shakes her head, but still whispers, “I can’t do this.”
I roll my eyes. She should really stop worrying about things that don’t matter. “C’mon, live a little. We won’t get in trouble if you keep your mouth shut. It’ll be fun. Trust me.”
I pull her with me and we go inside. I check the place for guards and employees before I run toward the first service-entry door. I know these always lead straight to the right place, and I’m right. When we go in, the first thing I see is large red chairs and a giant screen playing a movie. If we can sneak in now without making any noise, we won’t get caught, but she needs to stay quiet.
“Quiet,” I whisper to her, making sure she’s not going to do anything reckless.
I take her to the seats in the back row and when I sit down it’s like heaven. God, these seats are nice. I always forget how good these feel. I could almost fall asleep. Maybe I should just bring one of these chairs back with me to the dorm. I snigger at the thought.
“Do this often?” Leafy suddenly whispers.
She’s still going on about that? I guess it’s really bothering her. I don’t want to come across like a criminal, so I just say, “Sometimes.”
“But if we get caught, we’ll be in major trouble.”
“I’ve done this often enough to know how not to get caught,” I say, glaring at the screen in the hopes that she will just give up and learn to let it go for once. I wonder if she’s always been this strict with rules. She really doesn’t seem to like breaking them. What is she so afraid of?
I just don’t say anything else, hoping she’ll start watching instead of worrying. And after a while I think she actually does. She doesn’t seem to be that tensed up anymore, and her eyes are on the screen, just like mine. Maybe she just needed reassurance.
When I look at her, I can see she’s liking this movie, because every other second a big smile appears on her face that just lights my heart on fire. I like watching her from a distance.
“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” I ask.
“What? The movie? Yeah … it’s fine,” she stammers. She seems taken aback by my comment, as if she’s suddenly back to feeling guilty about breaking the rules. I’m not letting her get away with it this time. She is enjoying this, I saw it with my own eyes. She can’t deny liking the idea of doing something against the rules sometimes.
“No. You’re starting to like being a lawbreaker,” I say.
She scowls. “I am not!”
I laugh wolfishly. It’s funny to see her get so worked up over being bad. I like bad. “Of course you are.” She’s so wedged up
between her rules that she’s oblivious to the fun she could have if she’d loosen up. I know she wants it, she just doesn’t know how.
I lean toward her and say, “You pretend you’re a proper schoolgirl, but you feel caged by it.” She’s so pretty up close, with her frizzy hair caressing her cheeks. My fingers instinctively drift toward her hair, and I think she just stopped breathing. “On the inside you’re begging to be released.” I grab a strand of her hair and tuck it behind her ears so I can see more of her skin. I’d do pretty much anything to see more of it. Unfortunately, her hair is as stubborn as she is.
“I … have to go to the bathroom,” she says, the pitch of her voice changing.
She jolts up from her seat like a bee stung her in the ass, and she tries to pass me. Well, I’m not letting her get away that easily. I stretch my feet, and she stumbles over them. I hold her waist as I try to stop her from leaving, but instead she falls down right on top of my lap.
Fuck. This feels good. Her tiny ass is pressing down against my cock. My hands are still on her waist, and I fight the urge to slide them up her body and grasp her firm tits in my hand.
Holy fuck.
This is just like in my fucking dreams, only this time I’m awake. Every nerve in my body springs alive, my blood pumping into my cock. There’s nothing better than having her on my lap like this. I imagine pulling her trousers and panties down in one go and burying my cock deep into her wet folds. I want her so badly, but shit, I know she wouldn’t be able to even handle feeling me getting hard for her like this. I tighten the muscles in my legs, hoping it masks the boner poking up her ass.
She springs up immediately, scrambling out of the seat like she’s on fire and wants to douse the flames. She runs out of the theatre with the exact same penguin-like foot shuffling I saw before, on her first day at campus. Guess she couldn’t handle it. I chuckle and wait until my cock has deflated again before getting up from my seat, patting down my pants and going after her.
I go out the door and make sure the coast is clear before walking down the hallway. I look around, but don’t spot her anywhere. Don’t tell me she really made a run for it? I’m not that scary. She could be anywhere.
Fury (New Adult Romance) - #1.5 Fierce Series Page 14