Selena laid a palm on my shoulder and it was only then I realised I was shaking.
“Go,” I demanded, but her hand didn't leave my skin.
“You're more alive after you drink,” she whispered and I span around, burying the grief in my chest.
“Not alive,” I snarled. “I'll never be alive.”
Her eyes flashed with indignation. “Living is overrated,” she muttered.
“Get out!” I snapped and she shrank from me, clutching her hands to her chest like I was about to rip out her heart. Perhaps if I did, I could save us both a lot of trouble.
Her face became stony, then she walked from the room without another word. I ached as I watched her go, hating what I'd done.
A while passed before I turned the shower off, marching out into the bedroom, leaving a trail of water behind me. Selena was perched on the edge of the bed, clawing her hands into the sheets.
“Don't ever complain about your life, Selena,” I bit at her. “If you didn't want it, you'd stop trying to survive this place.”
She sprang to her feet, glaring at me through dark eyes. “When I die, it will be my choice. Not someone else's.” Her expression spoke of pain and some shadow in her past that haunted her. I knew it wasn't the games that had planted that darkness in her heart. I'd seen it that day at the prison. The girl seemed to be living just to spite the rest of the world.
“Your strength will run out,” I said. “Then what will you have left?”
She glared at me with venom in those obsidian eyes. “What you have, I guess,” she snapped. “Nothing.”
My insides shrank. She saw right through me. I was a husk of the person I'd once been. I resembled him, but everything he'd once possessed had been taken from me the day I was turned.
She dropped her eyes, sucking the insides of her cheeks. “I didn't mean that,” she breathed. “I'm sorry.”
I couldn't remember the last time I'd been apologised to; I felt completely out of my depth. “No, you're right about me.”
She shook her head, guilt etched in her features. I moved toward her, bending low and taking her hands. The warmth of them made my heartbeat quicken and something seemed to expand inside my chest. “But helping you has given something back to me. Something to hold on to.”
She gripped my palm, her nails digging in and I almost felt the pain of it. “Please, don't let them send me to that man.”
I ground my jaw, the mere thought of it reeking havoc on me. I wasn't used to all these feelings; my head was a rush of confusing signals. But above them all, one thing prevailed. Saving her.
“I promise.”
She kissed me, her mouth burning hot against mine. And I felt all of it, unlike last time when I'd only been half awake. Now I was fully, unbelievably present. My heart fought against my chest, my blood rushed harder through my veins. My desire for her met boiling point and I detached myself, fearful of hurting her.
For a moment, I considered telling Selena Mercy's theory of why her blood was special, why Ravenos had reacted to it when he drank it. But even I wasn't sure I believed it.
Her fingers entwined with mine and a sigh passed my lips. Whatever any of this meant, could not be discussed now. I tugged her toward the door.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
“I'm getting you out of here.”
Selena wanted an explanation but I hushed her, moving past two guards stationed along the corridor. They eyed her suspiciously, but said nothing, which was predictable. The Helsings may have had the upper hand over me, but their guards were as human as they came. And they knew better than to challenge me on anything.
I led her downstairs, keeping her hand firmly clamped in mine. There was only one way we were going to walk off this island alive, so I headed to Brice Edgewater's room, hunting him down by scent.
Selena was leaving this island. Today.
Selena
“No matter what happens, I need you to trust me,” Varick said as we walked. I noted his clothes were still sodden from the shower he'd taken. It didn't seem worth mentioning; he either didn't notice or didn't care.
As we walked, I felt that I was balancing on the edge of a knife, one slip would end me. But I'd never felt more alive, or more reckless. I knew what was driving my actions now. Kissing Varick had made my heart beat faster. And reminded me I was still here, still fighting.
Thoughts of Cass flitted in and out of my mind. Of Briony's closing eyes. Of Kite falling, her fingers grazing freedom. I was standing here because of all of them. And I wouldn't forget that.
Varick bashed his fist against Brice's door; it was located in the northern tower, each level housing the men in corridors full of rooms. A group of men passed us and I felt their eyes eating into me. My chin was held high, and I stared right back at them, mentally killing them over and over in my head.
The door opened and Varick immediately thrust me into Brice's arms. I prayed he had a plan, because I was being thrown to the wolves here.
Brice was younger than I'd expected, perhaps in his early twenties. Attractive too, not the kind of guy who needed to bid for a night with a girl. Certainly none as plain as me.
His fingers curled around my wrist and the warmth of them was more disconcerting than Varick's cold hands had ever been.
“She's all yours,” Varick said without emotion and Brice pulled me backwards into the room.
Varick swiftly followed, shutting the door with a kick.
“Some privacy would be appreciated,” Brice said, pushing me toward the bed and heading for a bottle across the room. Whiskey. Typical.
My mouth curled into a sneer, but I quickly reconstructed my expression into fear as Brice turned to face me.
Varick moved toward him at speed, knocking the crystal glass from his hand. He gripped his neck, forcing his eyes to meet his.
“Relax,” he commanded and Brice went slack in his hold, but Varick didn't release him. “You will tell the Helsings I brought Selena to you. You spent the night together and she left in the morning.”
“In the morning,” Brice murmured vaguely.
My heart lifted with hope as I watched.
Varick glanced at me. “I'd appreciate you covering your ears for the next part. A guy like this would share the details with his friends.”
I screwed up my face in disgust. “Can you at least make him think I put up a good fight?”
Varick's mouth pulled up at the corner. “I doubt he'd expect anything else.” He fixed his gaze on Brice's dreamy eyes once more and said, “Ears.”
I sighed, covering my ears, feeling idiotic.
Varick started speaking and I was too curious not to listen. I lifted my palms and immediately clamped them back down, my cheeks flaming. Damn Vampire. Where did he get ideas like that?
I found myself sinking onto the bed, my back to them so I didn't even have to watch Varick talking about me like that. A glint of silver caught my eye beneath the pillow and I lifted it, immediately springing to my feet. My heart thumped loudly as I took in the chains ringed around the bedposts. At the heart of them, lay a silver dagger.
I was suddenly there again, beneath my stepfather. What if I hadn't had that knife to save myself?
My breaths grew ragged as I considered what this man had been planning to do to me. And I grew angry. Angrier than I'd ever been in my life. After everything I'd been through, everything I'd survived and this monster had been planning to rip the last piece of humanity from me.
I grabbed the dagger, murder flooding my veins. Varick's words halted and he snapped around, sensing my approach.
I screamed out, slashing the dagger at Brice, but Varick caught my wrist, his eyes blazing at me.
“Selena!” he warned, then his eyes slid over my head, taking in the chains on the bed. I saw the same thing break in him that had broken in me and without a second thought, he snapped Brice's neck.
I lurched backwards at the sound of the sickening crack, the dagger dropping from my hand
. “Varick,” I gasped in shock.
His shoulders were hunched, his breathing heavy as he tried to regain control. A barrier dissolved around my heart; one I hadn't realised had been in place. Varick had protected me, without thought, without even a brief hesitation.
I laid a hand on his back, tears filling my eyes. “Thank you.”
He stiffened, turning to me and dragging me into his arms. His heart thumped against me, hard and fast and so very human.
A knock came at the door and we split apart, gazing at it in horror.
“Hey mate, you in there? We want a look at her.”
I shuddered internally and ducked down, taking the dagger into my hand.
“Let them in,” Varick growled in a deadly tone, but I shook my head, knowing we had to leave.
“We have to get out of here.” I glanced toward the window with a sinking feeling. We were half way up the tower. How could we possibly escape?
Varick followed my gaze, looking to me then back to the door. He shut his eyes, his hands visibly trembling.
“Calm down.” I rested a palm on his chest.
In a flash of movement, he grabbed me, chucking me over his shoulder so a scream of surprise escaped me. He climbed onto the bed, pushed open the window and clambered through it.
I gasped, clinging to him as I hung like a doll over his shoulder. I bit down on my lip, forcing myself not to scream again as he started shimmying down the wall, using the gaps in the ancient bricks as hand and foot holds.
Snow was falling, obscuring my view. Flakes caught in my hair as it swung below me and the arctic wind froze me to the bone in seconds.
When we hit the ground, Varick started running, so fast that I felt sick. It was like the time Ravenos had carried me, but even faster, the world just a stream of white passing me by.
We halted so abruptly that my head smacked against his spine.
“Put me down!” I demanded and Varick complied, planting me on my bare feet before him. I was so dizzy, I immediately dropped to the floor.
“Sorry, sweetheart.” He scooped me up like a baby and I clung to his neck, having no choice but to hold onto him as my mind spun in circles.
A noise reached to me that made every hair on my body stand to attention. The rise and fall of a screaming alarm, like a bomb siren, whirring in my ears.
The creak of wood and lap of water caught my attention and I managed to focus enough to find us walking along a pier.
My vision restored as Varick carried me onto a yacht: the same one I'd been brought to this island on.
Varick set to work, hurrying around me, readying the boat to sail. I was useless, watching him, having no idea what he was doing. He headed into a cabin and, after a minute, a motor hummed in my ears.
The cry of nearing Vs sounded across the island and I sucked in an icy breath, realising they were coming after us.
“Go!” I urged Varick, hurrying to his side in the cabin.
The snow sat in the calm bay, the flakes falling, sheeting us in a curtain. I prayed it gave us enough cover to escape.
Varick turned to me, his eyes hardening to steel. “Press this lever forward. When you're ten miles south of here, you'll be able to use the radio to call the Norwegian coastguard.”
I was already shaking my head. “Aren't you coming?”
His brows drew together, forming a sharp V between his eyes – strangely marking him as what he was. “They'll kill me the second they realise I'm gone.” He pointed to the back of his head and a sobbed escaped me.
“I can't leave you,” I blurted, knotting my hands into his shirt. It was still damp, colder than his chest beneath it.
Through the silent snowfall, I heard Vs hit the water, splashing over the pier into the icy bay, hunting us.
His lips met mine for the briefest of moments, just long enough that I shut my eyes to savour the feel of them. Then he was gone.
“Varick!” I shouted, running to the edge of the yacht, spotting him down on the pier, casting out the yacht. The Vs brought him to his knees and I screamed out again.
It was only then I realised, he'd already pressed the lever forward, causing the yacht to sail into the bay. The sweeping storm engulfed the sight of him, surrounded by the Vampires.
I dissolved into tears, my hands trembling as I brought them to my mouth.
Impossibly, the moment I'd been imagining for so long was finally here. I was going home, leaving this nightmarish island far behind. But now there was no part of me that could bear to leave. Not without Varick. Not when the Helsings still lived, still playing their sick games.
And then there was the promise I'd made Cass. One I knew, deep down in my heart, that I could never break.
A promise for revenge.
Epilogue:
Varick
A river of my own blood surrounded me, my skin healing over from the damage that had been inflicted by the sunlamps, the silver chains, and many more of Ingus's contraptions. As I lay in the Helsings' dungeon, Mercy's whispers ran through my mind: the words she'd spoken about Selena. Of what she suspected she was.
From the moment I'd been turned, I had made it my mission to seek out a cure. Something to reverse the Vampire curse that had been laid upon me and tarnished my soul. But I'd given up hope after too many years of searching, at last surrendering to the half-life I'd been left with.
Ravenos had been powerfully affected by Selena's blood, and so had I. I hadn't felt this human since I'd actually been alive. But if Selena's blood could return a V to its human form entirely, then she was in danger. From both Hunters and Vampires alike. And now helping her to escape on the yacht was starting to seem like a terrible mistake. Because I could no longer protect her. And the agony of that knowledge was worse than the literal torture I was being subjected to in this cell.
For some reason, my mind drifted to the day I had been turned. Somehow, it comforted me to relive the last few hours before my human life had been stolen from me. Back when my crew had walked at my side...
Spring, 1804
We'd travelled south for days on end. My King wasn't so keen on me or my men, it seemed; the English were sentencing twelve pirates to death every day. Or so I'd heard. And my information was weak seeing as it came through the flapping mouths of whores into the ears of my drunken crew. Exaggeration was in their nature, especially if Pud caught word of a story. By the time he'd retold it to my men, the details were exaggerated and unrealistic.
So we sailed for Clew Bay on the west coast of Ireland where a safe haven awaited us. My father had struck a deal with the pirate clan who resided there, which was of great fortune to us seeing as anyone not in allegiance with the clan were blasted out of the waters upon sight.
As we sailed into the bay, the colours of my father's ship were raised high on the main mast, surrounded by the rising land and calm Atlantic waters, we dropped anchor and made our way to shore. The pebbled beach rose to meet a single tower known as Rockfleet Castle, though it was barely more than a glorified tower. Sheer grey walls rose upwards to meet a ring of turrets at the top. It may have been small, but I was aware of the power this clan held. Not least by the many ships they had floating in the bay. If the cannons atop Rockfleet couldn't take us down to meet with Davy Jones, those on the Pirate Queen's fleet certainly could.
Kaitlin walked down the shore to greet me, a courtesy that didn't pass me by. Her mother and my father had been close and, as such, our bond remained in loyalty to them.
Her flame-red curls danced in the wind behind her as she moved into the water in sturdy boots. Unlike most of the women I came across, Kaitlin was no stranger to men's clothing. Her breeches were a dark green and she even had a velvet doublet on to match. The only feminine piece of her clothing was the knitted shawl she had gathered around her shoulders. And I could hardly blame her; the wind was biting.
“Varick.” She beamed a crooked smile and rushed to embrace me. The teasing from my men didn't surpass me and the moment Kaitlin released me, I
rounded on them. “Kaitlin's more man than half of you lot. I assure you, many have had a slit throat instead of a hello from her.”
Kaitlin eyed my men with raised brows. “So this is what passes for men these days?” she asked in her celtic tones, clicking her tongue.
“Apparently,” I muttered and she shot me a grin.
“Perhaps they'll learn a thing or two from the women of Rockfleet.” She turned on her heel to a chorus of whistles and I slid my sword from its holster in warning.
My men fell silent and my gaze landed on Pud who was stumbling up the rocky shore, his nose buried in a notebook as he furiously scribbled something down. He had come to annoy me less since I'd taken an interest in his training, but his stories were ceaseless. I had to enforce silence on him during his training, lest I lose my mind.
Jameson joined my side, adjusting his belt. “Why did you never bring us here before?” He gazed after Katilin with such intent that it made a laugh burst from my throat.
I clapped a hand to his shoulder. “Good luck laying her, mate. I'd reckon you're at risk of losing more than your dignity in trying.”
Jameson ran a hand over his braided blonde hair, smoothing it back. “If anyone has a chance, it's me. Always did have a thing for redheads.” His eyes slid to mine. “Or perhaps you have a previous arrangement with the girl?” He started pumping his fists by his hips and I jabbed him with the butt of my sword. He wheezed out a breath, clutching his side, still smirking.
“I'll take that as a yes.”
“You can take it however you like, James. Kaitlin's family-” I gave him a stern stare. “-are not for bedding.” Not that I really thought he had any chance of doing so. But his attempts may not have reflected well on me.
Pud halted before the tower that jutted into the sky above us and began furiously sketching on his pad.
I jerked my chin at him.“Round that one up, Jameson,” I ordered, marching ahead to join Kaitlin's side.
She linked an arm through mine as we waited for the door to be unbolted from the inside. It was a simple wooden arch, no good for keeping out an army.
V Games (The Vampire Games Trilogy Book 1) Page 29