“No. You have something to say, then say it, but you do it from over there. And to set the record straight, it’s not like I went and bought stocks in Dark Knight on the open market, big guy. My Nan signed her share over to me, and you can blame Pop for only just getting around to tell me about it. This isn’t my doing, so you can take your shitty attitude and shove it up your ass.”
Pointing to the spot in front of him, Knight repeats,
“Here. Now. If I have to tell you again, I’m bending you over my lap and spanking your tight little ass until you learn to do things the first time I tell you to.”
If he thinks that’s a deterrent, he better think again. The image of being bent over Knight’s muscular thighs while he uses his large hand to spank me is seriously hot. In fact, it’s good enough to be filed away for later when I need new masturbation material.
Apparently unimpressed with how long it’s taking me to make the decision, Knight grabs my wrist and tugs hard. My body collides with his and his arms lock around the small of my back. I can still feel the persistent erection he’s had since I first sat on his lap. I didn’t think it was possible, but it’s even bigger and harder now than it was before, which serves him right. I hope he has a severe case of blue balls after this for being such an asshole.
Knight’s jaw twitches as he looks at me with a mixture of unrestrained hunger and frustration.
“I want you to sell me your part of Dark Knights, Zara. That’s not a request either; it’s a demand. I’ve got the money, I’ll buy you out. Today.”
Winking at him, I grin.
“Not gonna happen, big guy. I think I’m going to like bossing around a bunch of sexy men. I mean, I get to do that here when I’m training some of the guys, so I can only imagine Dark Knights will be like that but on steroids.”
“Zara,” he warns. “I’m not kidding. Sell me your part, and we’ll be done with it.”
“Sorry, partner, but my answer is, no,” I smile at him, causing Knight’s eyes to harden and his mouth to pull into a thin line.
Pushing me away, none too gently I might add, Knight runs his hands through his hair agitatedly.
“Goddammit, Zara. Don’t you get it? You shouldn’t be exposed to this shit, much less be immersed in it. This isn’t a game. Your brother would essentially be working for you, which would make you his pimp.”
That statement earns him a giggle. I’d say I’m sorry, but I’m really not.
“And that right there almost makes you being so pissy worth it.”
“Fucking hell,” he growls. “Locke is going to have my balls on a silver platter when he finds out. You know that, right?”
“Well, he’ll just have to suck it up like the good little princess he is,” I shrug. “But why don’t you tell me what’s really got your boxers in a bunch? It can’t possibly be my big brother’s reaction since I never intended to tell him.”
“And how well do you think that’ll go down when he finds out both of us have been hiding it from him?” Knight probes. “Because I’ll let you in on a secret, in case you didn’t already know, but Locke isn’t exactly the forgiving type. He hates liars, Zara. And this is a fucking big lie if we keep it from him.”
This is true. With Locke’s history and everything that happened with Violet, I’m well aware how much he detests people lying to him.
“Then feel free to tell him; I won’t stop you. Stop deflecting, though, and answer the damn question. What’s got you so on edge?”
Averting his eyes, Knight paces back and forth behind his desk muttering,
“It won’t work.”
For God’s sake. Throwing my hands up in exasperation, I hiss,
“What won’t work? We work side by side every day, Knight. I handle my shit, and you handle yours; it’s the same damn thing.”
“No, it’s fucking not,” he snaps back. “You seem to be forgetting something, sweetheart. I might have said I was the brains behind the business when it started, but I’m not now.” Stalking toward me with his fists clenched, he bites out, “I’m just like them, Zara. I fuck women for money, and I get off on it. I like what I do, the women I see more than like it, they fucking love it. Four, five, six women a week, sweetheart. I pick them up, escort them wherever they need to go for the evening, and then I take them back to their place and fuck them hard all night.”
Well, okay then. Coincidentally, Knight may be right. I definitely overlooked or knowing me ignored that not so minor detail during his earlier explanation. But in the grand scheme of things, what does it matter? Knight isn’t mine. He doesn’t have to make excuses for how much he enjoys sex. And he certainly doesn’t have to stop on my account.
Gathering all of the inner strength I have, I try to come across as nonchalant as possible when I reply.
“Who am I to tell you who to sleep with? That has nothing to do with me. Would you demand I stop fucking Cooper if he started paying for personal training here?” I ask, knowing that as soon as I do, I’ve made a huge mistake.
Knight’s eyes turn feral, and a low growl rumbles from deep within his chest.
“I’d tell you to stop sleeping with him now if I thought you’d listen to me. He’s no good for you, Zara, and you know it.”
“No, actually, I don’t. Cooper’s great otherwise I wouldn’t keep going back for more? He’s the first and only man who has treated me with respect, not like a piece of meat to throw away once he’s taken his pound of flesh,” my voice trembles.
It’s not a lie, Cooper is great. He’s not my forever guy, but right now I’m not looking for that. I know people don’t understand the strange friends with benefits relationship Cooper and I have, but it really isn’t all that complicated. I call him, or he calls me, one of us show up at the others apartment, and we fuck like bunnies. End of story.
We set down ground rules in the beginning to avoid the usual after sex awkwardness, and it works for us. No sleepovers. No post-coital cuddling. We don’t shower together. Protection is mandatory. No fucking other people while we’re boning each other. But most importantly, when one of us calls it quits, we go back to being just friends, no hard feelings.
“Bullshit,” Knight barks. “He’s in love with you. He’s just too big of a pussy to tell you as much.”
“Not even close,” I deny. “Cooper is no more in love with me than I am with him, which is not at all.”
“Whatever helps you sleep at night, sweetheart. But for the record, you’re fucking delusional if you honestly believe the shit you just said. That guy’s been in love with you since he took you to your senior prom. I saw the way he looked at you then, and I see how he looks at you now, and nothing’s changed,” Knight imparts. “If you want to keep leading him around by his dick, letting him get in even deeper, then be my guest. But trust me, you’ll only end up hurting him.”
My mind flashes back to prom and the way Cooper held me as we danced. It wasn’t friendly, but it wasn’t overtly sexual either. At the time, I thought it felt intimate because of the shared history we have. I mean, we’ve been friends since the third grade for Christ’s sake. But I can’t shake the ring of truth to Knight’s words at what happened when Cooper took me home that night.
We were laughing and joking in the back of the limo after dropping the other two couples off at their final destinations; parties if I remember correctly. Cooper and I were staying overnight at a lake house some of our other friends had rented an hour or so away. Unexpectedly it had been a beautiful night. Especially since I hadn’t wanted to go in the first place, but Cooper talked me into it.
About half way there, Cooper’s face lost all traces of humor and became intense yet guarded at the same time. He was watching me like a hawk when his hand began its journey from my knee to the top of my thigh. It felt good, so I didn’t stop him. I thought about it, I almost did because he was my friend, but I’ll admit I was curious to see how far he would take it.
That night was the first time we slept together. I lost my virgin
ity to him, and vice versa. When Cooper told me he hadn’t been with a girl before, I laughed. I mean, what were the odds? He’s tall, dark, and sexy as hell. His broad shoulders, heavily muscled arms, and thighs are the stuff of wet dreams. Not to mention, the man is packing eight inches below the belt. Which conversationally, he knows how to use. Extremely well, if I do say so myself.
Mumbling a curse, I huff out a breath.
“Even if he is, Cooper and I have a deal.”
“Fuck your deal, Zara,” Knight fumes, rubbing a hand over the back of his neck. “Because I promise you, that prick won’t hold up his end of it.”
“You don’t know him like I do,” I protest adamantly.
“No, I don’t. But you don’t know Cooper as well as you think you do either. If you did, you’d cut him loose.” Then Knight shocks the ever-loving shit out of me with a proposition I would never have seen coming in a million years. “Give me one night. One night to show you what it feels like to be fucked by a man that wants to own you, not treat you like spun glass. One night that you promise to hand over complete control of your body and let me see to your pleasure. I won’t hurt you, but I will push you to your limits, sweetheart. I’ll take you however I want, wherever I want, and you won’t get a say in it. If I want to bend you over and spank your perfect ass, I will. If I want to eat your beautiful pussy until you come all over my face, I’ll do that too. And when I sink my cock inside you because believe me, there will be plenty of that, I will fuck you so hard everyone else will be a distant memory for you. Let my prove to you that there’s better out there than settling for a guy that makes you laugh but doesn’t make your panties wet.”
Erotic visions of Knight bent over my back as he thrusts into me from behind play on repeats. I can almost feel his hands roaming across my skin and the callouses on his palms. Every one of my nerve endings is on high alert at the dark, sensual tone of his voice, and more than anything I want to say yes. Yes to everything he described. Yes to everything, period.
But then reason and rationality creep in. The dirty, fun stealing, cock-blocking bastards they are. If I were to accept Knight’s proposition, what then? We have to work together every day, and now we’re partners in a business where I’ll have to see and hear about his exploits with other women. And therein lies the problem. I just don’t think my heart could take that kind of a beating.
Knowing that Knight had been inside me – even if it were only for one night like he says – would be too much. I’ve been able to compartmentalize my feeling for him up until now on the basis that I’ll never know what I’m missing.
I will never know what it’s like to feel his lips on mine, have him kiss me the way I’ve dreamed he would. I wouldn’t know how it felt as he buried himself inside my body and stretched me wide. And I wouldn’t miss the way it felt when he came because I knew it would never happen. But this proposition will fuck my resolve to hell and back, leaving me yearning for more of a man I would never have while he moved on to the next woman on his roster.
So, no, I can’t and won’t. Not only because it’s not fair of Knight to ask, but because it’s not fair to my heart. That bitch is fickle on the best of days, and a taste of Knight won’t be enough. She will want all of him, and that’s impossible seeing as he still belongs to another woman whether he wants to admit it or not.
Telling myself to be strong, I pull my dirty thoughts out of the gutter and face him head on.
“As generous as your offer is, I’m going to have to take a pass. If all you’re after is for me to sign over my share of Dark Knights, then have your lawyer draw something up that transfers ownership to Locke,” I say, surprising him.
“Are you fucking serious?” He gapes at me. “You’d really do it; just like that?”
“Why not?” I shrug. “I live in a one-bed apartment, and I own my truck, Knight. I earn enough working here to put clothes on my back, food on the table, and help Pax with books and living expenses, so it’s not as if I need the money. Locke, however, does. He has Violet to think about, and I know he’s been wanting to start his own custom carpentry business for years, so if this helps him do that, then have at it.”
The shock passes quickly but is followed up with skepticism.
“Two seconds ago, you were all fired up to become a silent partner, what’s changed?”
“Nothing,” I lie. “I just happen to agree with you. Don’t let it go to your head, though, because it’s a once off. You’re right, this won’t work. We already work together, and you can’t go a day without firing me, so I can only imagine how much worse it will be if we had to see each other more often.”
“Don’t fucking lie to me, Zara,” he growls, smacking both of his huge palms down on the desk.
His forearms bulge, the veins standing out starkly against his tanned, olive skin. I can see the tension in his frame by the set of his shoulders, and the wide stance of his legs. Knight is braced for a fight. A fight he won’t be getting from me.
“I’m not. Lying denotes I have reason or inclination to hide something from you, which I don’t,” I return, not sounding believable in the slightest. “What you do is up to you, Knight. If you want to buy me out, fine. If you want me to sign something so that Locke can take over my share, that’s fine too. Let me know when you come to a decision.”
“This is about my offer, isn’t it?” He hedges, hitting the nail on the head. “It stands, Zara. Dark Knights aside, I want inside that beautiful body, and one way or another, I always get what I want.”
There’s no way for me to answer that without giving too much away, so I don’t. Choosing to walk away with my pride intact instead, I don’t think before I speak; I’m an idiot like that sometimes.
“If you’re serious, ask me again when you’re in the position to do something about it, not while you’re still getting the gym back in the black, fucking other women, and still in love with your ex-wife.”
A string of curses and the crash of something hitting the wall follows me out the door, but I don’t look back. Knight has to sort his shit out, and my intention is to give him all the time and space he needs to do that.
CHAPTER EIGHT
~ Knight ~
“Getting into a relationship may sound tempting, but so was getting on the Titanic and look what happened there.”
– Knight’s view on relationships
Staring down at the papers in front of me seeing Zara’s signature on them is like a proverbial kick to the gut. I honestly didn’t think she would go through with it.
“I can’t fucking believe it, man,” Locke grins, flicking through his copy. “I owe her big time for this, but don’t tell her I said that. She'd use that as an excuse to have me doing midnight runs for ice cream and playing her designated driver for life if she knew.”
Muttering under my breath, I grind out,
“She doesn’t want anything, not from either of us.”
“What was that?” He asks, cocking his head to the side.
“I said, Zara doesn’t want shit from either of us. Shane took the offer we discussed to her last week, and she told him to go fuck himself,” I recount the conversation Shane called me to tell me about five minutes after he left Zara’s.
“Figures,” Locke mumbles. “My sister won’t accept help from anyone.”
“This isn’t us helping her, Locke; it’s what she rightfully deserves,” I return, feeling my temper rising.
Shaking his head, Locke ignores me and goes on to say,
“Not saying it isn’t, just that she was never going to take it. Pop had a hard time getting her to accept his money a month ago when her truck broke down, and he’s the closest out of all of us to her, so I’m not surprised she wouldn’t take shit from you, buddy.”
I didn’t know about that. But then, Zara hasn’t spoken so much as a word to me that isn’t absolutely necessary since the day she left my office over a month ago. Not for lack of trying on my part, either. I’ve done everything but kidnap her a
ss and tie her to my bed to get her to talk to me, but she’s a stubborn little brat when she wants to be.
“What happened? I thought Paxton just finished the service on it,” I ask, needing to know what’s going on with Zara, even if it is through her brother.
“He did,” Locke nods. “He says thanks for the extra you gave him to do it too.”
Zara doesn’t know and she never will if I have anything to say about it, but I’ve been helping her out for years without her knowledge. Little things like making sure her car is running properly, paying her tabs at Glacier, and slipping Pax extra cash when he’s low anything to keep her from having to work harder than she already does.
It started out as a once off. Zara’s old as shit truck was on its last legs when Pax told me how much it was going to cost to repair it, and knowing Zara didn’t have the money to cover it, I paid him to do the work. But not until I had his promise that he’d keep it between us. It wasn’t so much that I was worried Zara would flip her shit and refuse my help – I knew I could convince her otherwise if I had to – it’s just that helping her made shit complicated for me, and I didn’t need that right then.
Vengeance MC Box Set - Volume 2: Gage ~ Cash ~ Knight (Vengeance MC series Book 8) Page 60