by Ann Hunter
The memory of being physically ripped from the shower back at Haven by minute six, and thrown to the hallway floor in front of Ashley and the other girls, still naked, made her shiver. Alex shut the water off.
She cleaned herself up and headed back to her room, falling into bed again. I hate showers.
Hillary trailed in behind her with her tablet and a mug that she set on Alex's night stand. She propped the tablet up in front of Alex and started up A League of Their Own.
"What's this baloney?" Alex asked.
"Trust me. You'll love it. You'll have a good cry and forget your pain for a little while. Laura and I both love it. It's a classic."
She’d see about that, still unconvinced that anything Hillary did would stop the imminent death.
"I brought you some ibuprofen and a cup of peppermint tea, too."
Alex tuned her out as she spoke, watching on the tablet as some bulky red-headed chick caught a stupid baseball from another red head who turned out to be her cow-loving sister. Dairy maids. Playing baseball. So far… unimpressed.
Alex became aware of a cold spot on her back, followed by the soft caress of hands, and reached behind her quickly.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Who's touching me?" She looked over her shoulder at Hillary. "Why the hell are you touching me?"
Hillary sighed. "You know I don't like when you swear."
"Cry me a damn river. What do you think you're doing?"
“You’ll thank me later.”
“Did I say you could touch me?”
Hillary’s shoulders fell. “I’m sorry. My Mom side kicked in.” She held up a small, dark vial. "I'm rubbing some chamomile oil on your back.”
“You and your creepy voo-doo.” Alex turned back to the tablet.
Hillary returned to working on her back, much to Alex's reluctance. "If it's good enough for the horses," Hillary said, "it's good enough for you."
“Yeah, yeah,” Alex muttered, “Next time, buy me dinner first.”
When Hillary was done, she sat on the edge of the bed. "Look, I know you don't really respect nice, so I'll be straight with you. This is a wonderful, beautiful time in your life, and I know you don't think of me as your mom. But I made a promise to give you a good home, and that covers all the mom privileges including, but not limited to, embarrassing you in public, grossing you out, chewing your head off, and— "
"Were you going somewhere with that? Cuz I'm trying to watch the cow-lovers play with their balls."
Hillary sighed and left. Not long after, Alex conked out, lulled to sleep by tea, chamomile, and ibuprofen.
SPRING FEVER
The following morning, Alex sat at the breakfast table with Laura, Cade, and Hillary, laying her cheek against her folded arms much the same as she did the previous morning.
Today, Hillary had made scrambled eggs, sausage, and pancakes with real butter, which Alex thought smelled amazing but simply didn't have the stomach for. She watched the steam rise and twist from the food and poked half-heartedly at the eggs with her fork.
"Could you pass the ketchup?" Laura asked, cutting her sausage in two.
She took the bottle from Cade, setting her silverware aside to squeeze it. Red gunk shot out like a mad tide, splattering in a fart noise at the end. Alex scrunched up in her chair, reminded of the dull ache radiating from her lower back, and front.
Laura handed the bottle to her. "Want some?"
Alex rose from her seat and grabbed her plate, placing it on the nearby counter. She reached for the knob of the front door.
"Where you off to?" Cade asked.
Alex paused. "Out."
Hillary cleared her throat. "Alex, why don't you wait a few minutes. There's something Cade and I want to show you today."
Alex sagged. She hated the sap of energy in her body, hated that she would normally argue and just didn't have the will to right now. She backed up a few feet to the stairs and sat on the first couple, leaning her chin on her hands against her lap.
Cade finished his coffee, kissed his wife, and rinsed his cup. He smiled at Alex as he grabbed his jacket from the coat rack by the door. "Ready?"
"You make it sound like I should brace for impact or something," Alex said.
Cade opened the door and led her to another barn back from the others where she hadn't been before, just down the lane from the stallion barn. In the few moments it took her eyes to adjust from the bright sunlight when they went inside, Cade ducked into a room and returned with a riding helmet for Alex. The footing beneath her had a noticeable spring to it, and the scent of rubber filled her nose.
Cade toed the floor a bit. "It's shredded tire to absorb the shock."
Alex wondered if this was going to be another riding lesson intended to end badly. This must be where they bring all beginning riders who fall off and get punked by their horse.
She followed him to an adjoining room where Venus Galaxies, Mr. North's favorite mare and last year's Breeder's Cup Distaff winner, stood. Grooms worked around her, washing down beneath her tail, strapping on padded horse-booties to her hind hooves, and mantling her neck with a long heavy-looking flap of ridged leather.
Definitely not riding equipment.
A hulking black stallion was led in. He snorted and danced, chomping at the chain and bit in his mouth. "That'd be Black Knight." Cade clapped Alex on the shoulder, and leaned in as though he was about to impart some great earth shattering secret. "People think the Kentucky Derby is the fastest two minutes in sports, but they're wrong," he chuckled.
When he moved toward the stallion, Alex suddenly remembered he was the breeding manager for the farm and an awful realization sank in: Not a riding lesson!
She turned to the corner, and officially wanted to die.
Cade and some of the other grooms started yelling and calling to the stallion in encouragement, and Alex stupidly looked over her shoulder. She wish she hadn't. The stallion got on up on the mare, did his business, and slunk off again, leaving Venus Galaxies looking just as bewildered as Alex felt.
Alex sank against the corner wall, legs more jellified than after her riding lesson. She stared numbly, not even sure her brain was able to process this moment. Cade had lied. The rubber under her toes did nothing to absorb her shock
"There you are,” Brooke said from beside her. Alex jumped. “You okay?"
Alex wasn't sure she had words right now.
"Looks like you just had racehorse one-oh-one," Brooke said. "And you thought it started on the track." She kind of snorted like Alex's stark reaction was the funniest thing she'd seen. She grabbed her sleeve. "C'mon, we've got work to do."
Tension eased out of Alex as Brooke led her away from the breeding shed, chattering excitedly.
"So Pop and I got to talking about the yearlings. Spring and fall are North Oak's busiest times with foals dropping and yearlings being prepped for sale." Brooke bubbled on, her eyes lighting up. "And for the first time ever, Pop gave me my own group of yearlings to get ready."
Alex watched Brook walk backwards, flailing her hands to emphasize her excitement. "I'm so stoked. This is my chance to prove he can trust me with bigger responsibilities. If I turn out some of nice yearlings that sell well, maybe we'll get a couple of clunkers to train next spring."
Alex’s eyebrow raised. "Clunker?"
"Yeah, like a claiming horse or something. Just a side project. I'm gonna be sixteen next month— May. I can get my trainer's license in two years."
"Is that what you really want? To be like your old man."
Brooke’s mouth tilted upward. "Is there any other thing to want? It's like asking 'Hey, Al, wouldja like to breathe today?'"
Alex wasn’t sure if she was joking or not. "Okay, yeah. You've lived here so long you've turned into a robot. Weird."
Brooke shook her head. "You think that's weird? Wait til you watch complete strangers drop a couple million bucks on an untried yearling this September. Pop said the craziest thing he saw in his entire life was The Green Monkey s
elling for a cool sixteen as a two-year-old, and he was a total dud on the track. That's the thing about horse racing. There's no guarantee you'll ever get your money back, yet they keep dumping it into the industry like there's no mañana."
"That's nuts."
"Preach it, sister." Brooke stepped into the yearling barn. She stopped beside the stall of a bright chestnut filly with inquisitive eyes. "Wait here," Brooke told Alex. "I'll be right back. Need to grab some equipment."
The filly stepped to the door and angled her head, trying to shove her nose through the stall bars. Alex pushed her finger against the plush pink snip between the filly's nostrils and chuckled as the filly wiggled her lips.
Brooke returned with a couple of lead ropes, halters, and two helmets. "We'll start with this little lady. Most of the horses Pop gave me have already been desensitized. When they're babies, we rub 'em down with plastic bags and roll random stuff across their backs until they couldn't care less. That way they're only focused on running when we get to the track, and not on any debris they come across. Cuz, ya know, horses are only scared of two things."
"What's that?"
Brooke shouldered the filly's halter, clipping a lead rope to it. She gave Alex a quirky half smile. "Things that move, and things that don't." She passed a helmet to Alex and fisted it down on her head when Alex put it on. "Boink."
Alex grimaced, but clipped the chin strap together.
Brooke winked. "Safety first." She put her own helmet on, then slipped into the stall with Alex behind her.
"So here's what we're gonna do." Brooke eased the halter on to the filly. "You're going to hold her and keep her calm while I back her."
"Back her?"
Brooke passed the lead rope to Alex. "Keep that short. Hands right up by her halter. I'm going to gradually start putting more and more weight on her. Watch."
Alex got close to the filly's head and kept one eye trained on her and the other on Brooke. Brooke leaned against the filly's side and placed her hands on the horse's back. She hopped a few times the same way she'd shown Alex how to mount Approved, but keeping both feet on the ground instead of swinging up.
The filly tossed her head and swung away from Brooke, bumping into the wall. Alex held tight to her.
"That's natural," Brooke said. "Talk it out with her."
"Easy," Alex said softly. "You're alright"
The filly's nostrils flared and contracted. She held her head high, eyes rolling. She blinked with long, dark lashes Alex almost wish she had herself. When the filly relaxed, Brooke tried again.
"The trick is to get them used to someone hopping up and accepting weight." She leaned once more against the filly's side and bounced gently. "Eventually," she grunted as the filly moved away. "You'll get to balance across their backs."
Alex brought the filly to the center of the stall again and stroked her forehead. "You got this," she reassured.
Brooke tried one last time. The filly threw her head back, but instead of dancing nervously, her ears turned back and forth, listening.
Brooke smiled. "Aha!" She pointed to the ears. "See that? Progress." She patted the filly's neck. "We don't want to overwhelm them, so we'll come back tomorrow. She'll get it."
Alex handed the lead rope over to Brooke and massaged the hand that had held the filly tightly. "Are they all going to be like this?" She hoped not, because wrestling almost a thousand pounds of adrenaline kinda hurt.
Brooke shrugged as she undid the lead rope from the halter. She dropped a treat in the filly's feed bucket. "Depends on the horse. Some get it right off, others fight it. This girl was about middle of the road, typical."
"How many did the old man give you?" Alex followed Brooke from the stall as the filly inspected the bucket's contents. It rattled as she nipped it up greedily.
"Oh, a little less than a tenth of the entire yearling string."
Alex rolled her eyes. Math.
Brooke secured the latch on the stall and moved on to the next horse, a black colt with a sock on his back right leg, and no other markings. He reacted about the same as the filly, but Brooke actually managed to get the upper half of her body leaning against his back, holding perfectly still with her palms pressed into his back and elbows straight.
Alex held him, arms already aching from fighting nervous horses, and sort of jealous Brooke could just do a push up like that, like it was no big deal.
It went on much the same way for five other horses. Alex was relieved when one of the geldings they had been assigned just stood there like a table, not even blinking when Brooke rag-dolled over his back. Brooke was so pleased with him, she drummed on his belly and gave him lots of pats and scritches.
"Either he's lazy," Brooke laughed, "or he was a track pony in a previous life."
She slid off him and he dove into his bucket like the other yearlings had, devouring Brooke's treat.
Brooke slipped from the stall with Alex in tow. "Last one."
They came to Promenade's stall. The chocolate-chestnut colt looked over his shoulder, eye whites showing like crescent moons, then turned back. He shifted the weight in his hind end and sighed like he was too good for them.
Alex smiled. "We get to break him?"
"Train him," Brooke corrected. "We don't want broken horses around here. We want racers who think for themselves and love to get out there every day. But, yes." She looked at Alex. "I know how much you like him, so I made a little request. We got lucky."
Alex gripped the bars of the stall. "Hear that, Pro?"
Promenade swished his white tail as though the words were nothing more than a fly that annoyed him.
"Ready?" Brooke asked.
Alex blew out a breath. "As I'll ever be."
Brooke pushed open the stall door and they went in. She went to slip the halter over Promenade's head, but the colt nipped at her.
"Hey," she growled a warning.
Promenade threw his head up, ears flat against his neck. His nostrils flared as he exhaled. Alex thought only bulls breathed like that.
Brooke rolled her eyes, reaching up for the shaved spot behind the colt's ears to bring his head back down. "There's a reason we geld colts, son."
Promenade's ears flicked forward momentarily, as if contemplating the threat. He snaked for Brooke's armpit, and was met with a quick swat in the teeth. Brooke got the halter on him before the reprimand could fully register.
He stood wide-eyed, cocking his head like What just happened there?
Alex sniggered. Dumb horse.
"What happened to 'horses are our partners' and all that?" she teased.
Brooke held Promenade's halter on both sides of his head, staring him down. "That comes a bit later when they've learned manners."
Promenade arced his neck and nipped the edge of Brooke's green jacket.
"No," Brooke said firmly.
Promenade stamped one of his rear hooves, and tossed his head, but Brooke held him steady. Eventually he settled with a giant exhale.
"Better," Brooke said. "Thank you." She craned around momentarily to look at Alex. "Teenagers. Seriously."
"Teenagers?"
Brooke looked Promenade in the eye again. "Thousand pound teenagers that will kill you given the chance." She knocked on her helmet. "Hence the precautions."
"The others didn't seem as bad."
"I think this one…" Brooke noogied the bridge of Promenade's nose. "This one thinks he's hot stuff. Unruly punk. Been this way from day one."
Promenade craned his head around and blinked at Alex innocently. She smirked.
Brooke nodded to Promenade's side. "You wanna give it a go?"
Alex reached to scratch his haunches. "You just said he's a thousand pound killer."
"He'll be twelve hundred when we're done with him. All muscle, testosterone, and adrenaline. The most beautiful monster on four legs. We can use his 'tude to our advantage if we teach him to funnel it."
"I can't even stay on Approved, and you want me to try to hop on P
ro's back?"
Brooke's grip tightened on Promenade's halter as he tried to throw his head again. "I sound crazy, I know. But I've seen you together. I think he'll be more open to you trying it than me. And I'm stronger. I'll hold him better."
Alex chewed her lip.
"Trust me," Brooke urged.
Me. On a racehorse's back. Alex thought back to the Breeder's Cup last fall when she wanted nothing more while watching Venus Galaxies race. She took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. "Okay."
She inched to Promenade's side, watching his eyes roll back until the whites blended into his blaze. He raised his head ever so slightly, but Brooke held tight.
Alex placed her hands against his side. He seemed so much bigger now that she was about to try to bounce up there. She couldn't even get up on Approved by herself. She looked back to Promenade again. "Trust me boy?"
Promenade jigged and snorted.
Alex blew out a similar breath. Fate favors the fearless!
She pressed her hands against the hollow of the colt's back like she had seen Brooke do and started bouncing, trying to pull herself up. Promenade craned his head with a look that said, What in the world are you doing, Tiny?
After a few more bounces and Alex not getting anywhere, Promenade dropped his head and yawned.
Brooke chuckled. "ADD colt. Five minutes and he's over it."
Alex slumped against Promenade, arms barely thrown over his back. "Tomorrow?"
Brooke nodded. "Circle of racehorse life. Y'get up, y'work, y'sleep, and repeat."
Circle of life, Alex rolled her eyes. Yeah, sure. Her moment in the breeding shed came back to her and her embarrassment bubbled back to the surface. Can't ride a horse. Can't mount a horse. Can't even watch 'em get made. Alex wondered if she belonged at North Oak.
Brooke let the colt go and placed his reward in his bucket. She patted his neck. “The work we do with him will help get him ready for the September sale.”
Alex froze, staring at the girth of her big chocolate colt. Her eyes shifted darkly to Brooke. "What do you mean 'get him ready for the September sale'?"