It was so much worse than I imagined. My old man saved her life and put a lot on the line, including his reputation, to do so. All I could see was her rejection. I was blind to how badly she needed salvation from someone who could actually provide it. Even if she had accepted my proposal, there was no way I could do for her what my father had done. I didn’t have the means, and truthfully, I was too young and full of myself back then to see that there was another way to fight back with anything but anger and violence.
Silently saying every dirty word I could think of, I tugged my boots off and climbed into the bed upside down so that I could lie down beside her. I pulled her into my arms and was struck again by how soft she felt, but there was no ignoring that she had a spine forged of steel. I rubbed a hand up and down her back, muttering useless words while she battled booze and ugly truths for control of her emotions.
I thought she was drifting back to sleep when she went limp in my hold. I rested my chin on the top of her head and told myself I was not going to screw this up. I promised both of us that I would figure out how to be whatever it was she needed me to be. I had my eyes closed and was concentrating hard on keeping my excited cock to myself when she whispered a question that pulled me from my reveries.
“What would you have said back then if I was the one who asked you to marry me?”
She rolled over so that we were face to face. Her gaze was darker than the rest of the room around us, and I couldn’t tell what she was thinking. One of her hands fluttered until it landed in the center of my chest. My heart lurched at the contact. Every time this woman touched me, I felt something I'd never felt before. It was almost as if everyone who came before had to fight and claw their way through protective layers and never quite reached the unguarded core of the man beneath the smile and charm. There was none of that with Brynn. As soon as her fingers hit my skin, she was touching every raw and uncovered piece of me, and I felt that contact all the way down to my toes.
“I have no idea what I would have said. My parents’ marriage was a nightmare, and that was all I had to go by when it came to relationships. You were the one thing in my life I never wanted to risk losing, so there’s a good chance I would have said yes if it meant I got to keep you close by and tie you to me forever. I would have fucked up either way. I was so screwed up back then, so busy trying to prove I was good enough, strong enough, so that Dad didn’t have to worry about me or the ranch when Mom left and with Cy going, then again when he got sick. I wouldn’t have been able to give you what you needed back then regardless of who asked and who said yes.” I was giving it all to the birthright my father was leaving behind, trying to show him I was the man he needed me to be. There was nothing left for anyone else.
She leaned forward and pressed her lips to the point of my chin. “What if I asked you now.” One of her hands lifted and curled around the side of my neck. My pulse jumped to kiss her fingertips. She lifted one of those long, shapely legs and wrapped it around my hip. There was no hiding how hard I already was, and I nearly forgot my name when she slowly started to writhe and grind against me. It was languid and sensual and quickly made me forget she didn’t have a handle on herself because of the whiskey.
I smoothed a hand down the elegant line of her back until it was resting on her ass. I allowed myself a squeeze of that delectable flesh before pulling back, so there was more than an inch of space between our bodies. I could feel the heat radiating from that spot high between her thighs, and combined with my aching dick was making it hard to think straight.
“You want to ask me to marry you, Brynn? You weren’t even sure you liked me anymore when we started on this trip.” A groan slipped out when she used the leg that was coiled around my waist to regain the space I’d put between us. She was hot enough that I was ready to stick my hand in the fire and let it burn.
“I just want to be the one to ask. I want to pick the time and the place. I don’t even care if you say no. I want to be the one asking the person I choose to spend the rest of their life with me. I’m sick of being the one who gets asked and either I’m not ready, or the question doesn’t mean what I want it to mean.” Her lips ghosted over mine, and I tasted whiskey and want on her breath.
“I guess you’ll have to ask me and we’ll find out what I’d say.” I honestly didn’t know the answer. I never planned on getting married aside from marrying her to get her out of that house when she was younger. But if she wanted to spend the rest of her life with me, I couldn’t deny that I liked the way that made me feel. I was settled and whole in a way I hadn’t been since I pushed her out of my life.
She sealed her lips against mine, and I groaned when her tongue darted between my teeth. She was the headiest of flavors and intoxicating in a way that went right to my head. I kissed her back, taking my time and drinking up every drop of that smoky flavor. When she licked along the sensitive roof of my mouth, there was no stopping my hips from thrusting forward, or my cock from searching out her liquid warmth. I was so turned on it was hard to pull a coherent thought out of the haze of lust that was consuming me.
“As much as I like where all of this is going, you drank half a bottle of top-shelf whiskey. I think we need to put the brakes on and revisit this exact spot when we’re both in a better frame of mind.”
She pulled back and shot me a scowl. Her eyebrows dipped to form an angry V above her nose, and her obsidian eyes seemed to shift to an even darker shade of black as she glared hotly at me. Her words were sharp and pointed when she spoke. I could feel the way they pressed into my unprotected heart. “When are you going to trust me to know what I want, Lane? When are you going to believe that I know what’s best for me? I’m a big girl, I don’t need you to protect me anymore, and the last person I want to be saved from is you.”
She started to wiggle away, but I locked my arms around her and used the hand I had on her butt to keep her in place. I lifted my eyebrows and watched her closely. “You want me, Brynn, or is this the booze and a broken heart talking?”
She blinked at me and studied me intently in the dark. “I want you, Lane. I’ve always wanted you, and it has nothing to do with the booze or the broken heart.” She let me tug her body even closer to mine and didn’t argue when I rolled her so that she was underneath me and I was hovering over her in an extended push-up. She reached up and pushed at a lock of hair that had fallen over my forehead and dangled into my eye. “You are the only thing that will make all the bad things we faced today go away. You are the only man who has ever been able to make the rest of the world disappear, even when it’s falling down around me, and the wreckage is impossible to ignore.”
I only had so much self-control and so much willpower. This woman and I connected on every single level except for one, and if she said she was ready to cross that bridge that took us from friends to lovers, then who was I to stop her. Especially when everything inside of me wanted nothing more than to meet her in the middle of that bridge. Hell, I would follow her over if she decided to jump off the damn thing.
With a feral sounding growl, I dropped my mouth to hers and lowered myself so that I was braced above her with a forearm over her head. It took no time at all to pop the buttons on her flannel shirt and even less time to get her jeans open, and a hand shoved down into the tight space. Her skin was so soft, but her wet, faltering folds and the silken skin hidden between them was even softer. She arched up against me making our teeth clash and driving the aroused points of her breasts into my chest. There were still too many clothes in the way, but I didn’t have the wherewithal to do anything about it. Keeping my throbbing dick trapped behind my zipper was the only thing keeping me from coming all over her like an excited teenager before I got inside her sweet heat.
Her tongue twisted around mine and her hips lifted to ride my fingers, and I found her soaked opening and delicately protruding clit. The slip and slide as I worked my way inside her lithe body had a damp spot growing on the fly of my jeans. We were both wired and ready to blow.
The anticipation of this moment, of how we would feel, and move, and the taste was almost too much to take. Brynn panted into the ravenous kiss as she frantically pulled on the hem of my shirt, wordlessly asking me to remove it. I had to pull my hand free of her grasping, pulling center to get the garment off. While I was up on my knees, I urged her to lift so I could pull her pants down her endless legs and ordered her to strip off the rest of her clothes while I was unveiling her creamy thighs and perfectly bare and pink pussy. She had a smattering of freckles that danced across her lower abdomen, and I couldn’t stop the urge to lower my head and connect the dots, and I ran my fingers teasingly from the inside of her knee back up to her wet and willing center. I felt her muscles contract, and her thighs spread wider when I dipped the tip of my tongue into the tiny indent of her belly button.
Her fingers threaded through my hair, and I let her drag me up her torso until my mouth was hovering over the tip of one puckered nipple. I exhaled a deep sigh and watched as her pretty points contracted into even tighter peaks. They were a rosy, raspberry color that glowed against her golden skin. All the parts of her individually were perfect, stunning, flawless; when they were all together and splayed out before me, willing and waiting, I knew there would never be anything more beautiful. At that moment, all I wanted was to be worthy of that kind of beauty.
I pushed my fingers back into her damp opening and used the pad of my thumb to circle her clit. I swore I could feel that little bud of pleasure vibrating against my finger and I felt the way she reacted when her pussy clenched down tightly on my stroking and searching fingers. She let out a gasp that echoed through the big room, and her back bowed up off the bed when I lowered my head and encased her nipple in my mouth. I used my teeth to tug on the sensitive skin and rubbed the rough scruff of my chin across the satin surface of her breast. Brynn’s fingers tightened in my hair, and her thighs quivered. Her chest was rising and falling with raspy breaths, and she was saying my name over and over again. Her eyes were only half open, and there was a pretty flush covering all of her naked skin.
She was so responsive. Her reactions were both sweet and wild with every touch, every stroke, every flick, and twirl. I kissed my way across her collarbone, stopping to leave a mark at the base of her throat. When I landed on the breast I’d neglected up to this point, I added another finger to the ones that were already inside of her and added more pressure to her pulsing clit. I could feel her arousal flowing hotly over my fingers and taste it on her skin. When she pulled her legs up and set her heels on the edge of the bed so she could move more fully against me, I almost lost it. My cock pressed painfully against the denim keeping it from her skin and hardened to the point I was worried any move I made was going to leave us both with a mess. I rumbled dirty words against the side of her neck and moved my fingers with more force.
She threw her head back, red hair fanning out like flames across the white comforter. She looked as close to the edge as I was, but she was coherent enough to tell me between moans, “I’m so close, Lane, but I want to feel you. I want you inside of me. I want you to take me.”
Shit. I was planning on getting her off at least once before I got inside of her. This had been such a long time coming I didn’t want to ruin the moment or have it end before it even began.
“I’m close. Too close. Once I feel you all wrapped around me, I’m going to lose it. I want this to be good for you, Brynn. I want to be the best you’ve ever been with.” I wanted to replace every guy I was unknowingly fighting with for her heart.
She huffed out an irritated sound and pushed against me until I was standing at the side of the bed shirtless, with the head of my cock poking out from the top of my jeans. The slit was shiny and almost angry looking with my arousal.
“It’s you, so it’s already better than it’s ever been. I want you to fuck me. I don’t care how long you last. Hopefully, we get to do this a couple million more times, and you can make it up to me then. Besides, I told you I’m right there. I won’t last long either. I’ve waited my whole life for this moment.”
I grunted when she put her hand on the button of my jeans and wrestled it open. The brush of her fingers against my overheated skin was enough to make my knees shake, and my balls lift and tighten. When she reached for the zipper, I had to wave her off. There was no way I was making it through her putting her hands on me and taking me out of my pants without blowing my load.
To distract her and to get rid of the pout on her face I handed her my wallet and told her to find the condom I had stashed in there.
When I shoved my jeans down to my knees, my dick bounced up toward my navel. The swollen tip left a trail of moisture in its wake, and I could feel the heavy vein that ran along the backside of my cock throb with each beat of my heart. Brynn’s eyes widened at the sight, and her mouth dropped open in appreciation. Her gaze lifted to mine as she handed me the condom.
“That’s the only part of you that’s always been a mystery. I have to say the wait was worth it.”
I wasn’t about to be recruited for porn anytime soon, but I’d never had any complaints about what I was working with. I did feel a swell of masculine pride surge through me at the naked admiration in her eyes. I loved the way she looked with, and without, her clothes on; it was nice to know the feeling was mutual.
I rolled the latex down my shaft hissing through my teeth at the sensation. I usually had way more staying power than this, but something about her went right to the center of every desire and want I had. This was about so much more than getting in and getting off. I’d never fucked anyone I cared about before. I never went to bed with anyone I was desperate to keep in my life before. This was the first time I’d ever been with anyone my heart wanted as much as my cock did and it was wreaking havoc on my control.
Once my cock was sheathed, I shoved my pants the rest of the way down my legs and crawled up over her. Immediately her legs locked around my waist, her heels digging into my lower back. Her hips effortlessly lifted and my hardness met her softness with no resistance. Her fingernails dug into my shoulders, and I curved the hand I wasn’t using for balance around the curve of her hip. Even with the condom on I could feel how hot and tight she was. Her body quivered and shook around mine as I pushed my way inside. That sexy slide had both of us swearing and closing our eyes as the push of my body gave way to the pull of hers. I was surrounded by velvet heat. I was encased in the kind of warmth I never wanted to leave. Being inside of her brought it all together for me. This was how happy was supposed to feel. She was the only one who ever gave me that feeling. This, more than a good time, this was something that glowed radiantly from the place that had always belonged to her inside of my heart.
“Fuck, Brynn…why did we wait so long to do this? You feel so damn good.” I started to rock into her, hips pumping, my hand curling around the back of her leg and lifting so I could open her up even more. I loved the way she moved around me, taking whatever I had to give as I moved faster and got rougher.
“So do you. It feels perfect, and you didn’t even have to try.” She ran one of her hands over her breast, and I swore again when she started to play with her nipple.
“Oh, I’m trying, believe me. It’s taking everything I fucking have not to come before you.”
She smiled up at me and lifted her head so our lips could touch. Her tongue flicked against mine, and I felt my orgasm swirl around the base of my spine and coil along my nerves. She made a noise that almost sounded like a purr, and her eyes got a dreamy, faraway look in them. “Come. I’ve dreamed for years about what you would look like when you let go. I know all your expressions except for that one.”
Her teeth attacked my ear, and one of her hands skated down my spine and smoothed over my clenching ass. It was too much. She was too much. This moment collided with all of the feelings I was having, and I thrust inside of her hard enough to make myself see stars as I exploded inside of her. I felt her body ripple in approval around mine, her inner walls locking dow
n on my still pulsing dick. I shifted into her a few more times even though I was empty and had nothing left to give. I let go of her thigh and reached between us to playfully pull on her clit, and that was all she needed to follow me over the edge. She might have imagined what I looked like when I came, but there was nothing that could have prepared me for how spectacular she looked when she let go and lost it. The way her mouth opened on my name and the way her eyes glittered with satisfaction would stay with me forever. I would risk everything and give anything I had to put that expression on her face as often as possible.
“You okay?” When I pulled out, we both groaned at the separation. She smelled like sex and whiskey, and on top of all of that, she smelled like me. I wanted to bottle the scent up so I could take a whiff whenever I wanted. Losing her after inhaling that intoxicating mixture wasn’t an option for me now.
She gave me a sleepy smile and stretched languidly. “Best I’ve ever been.”
I felt the same, and I told her as much when I kissed her and got up to deal with the condom.
I found myself wondering if there was even another answer besides yes if she ever did ask me to marry her.
Chapter 10
Brynn
Float or Sink
I wasn’t expecting Bauer to still be in the room adjoining ours the next morning. He was skittish and nervous in a way that led me to believe he was absolutely going to bolt as soon as he was left to his own devices.
I’d taken him to one of the shops in the hotel and spent a mini-fortune on the basics for him. I tried to get him to eat dinner with Lane and me, but he flat out turned me down. He did use Lane’s phone to send a flurry of text messages to his brother, but there hadn’t been a response back. Lane let the kid keep his phone in case the brother was tied up and couldn’t shoot a text back until later. That left Bauer with everything he needed to cut and run. He was so used to relying on only himself; he couldn’t fathom two complete strangers honestly having his best interest at heart and worrying about him.
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