by Diana Fraser
Cassandra couldn’t help herself. She closed her eyes and breathed in deeply of the garden’s heady fragrance that hung on the cool morning air. It tugged at her heart. She felt a connection, a belonging, she’d never felt anywhere else. With anyone else, she corrected herself.
She had to go. There was no other way.
She shivered and continued her slow walk through the tangle of shoulder-high wild and cultivated flowers, their aromas pungent in the early hours before the sun had risen. Drops of dew fell on her face from the flowers and newly-spun spiders’ webs that trembled, as if in anticipation of the day ahead. The very air seemed to hover, suspended in the early morning hush. She caught her breath and felt her skin tingle. It was truly a magical place.
She looked suddenly behind her. Despite the still languor of the garden, she felt on edge, thrilled—almost as though she were not alone.
She shrugged off the feeling. Stupid. If it was too early for Rosa it would definitely be too early for any of the other staff, or Dallas who preferred late nights to early mornings.
The thought of Dallas made her move again. Pushing the top-heavy flowers to one side, shedding petals as she went, she made her way to the wooden door in the garden wall which led to the bush path and on, down to the road. From there she would be free of the estate and free of Dallas Mackenzie.
Once she shut the door behind her, she was immediately enclosed in a different world. Native bush rose above her, darkening and dampening the air. She took a deep breath of the earthy, pungent air, and followed the path, its twisting way indicated by a trail of solar-powered lamps. Without them she would have been lost in the dense bush within moments of leaving the path.
Strange sounds made her jerk her head up and peer into the bush canopy, into the thin strip of lightening sky visible directly overhead the path. But it was only huge silver ferns that coiled and shook over her head, only the ancient vines that creaked in the wind.
The place was raw, untouched, wild. Her heartbeat quickened as she tried to contain a shudder, not of repugnance, but of fear. It seemed to challenge her, speak to her soul.
“No,” she said, her voice hardly audible to her ears. “It’s too hard. I can’t go there.” She couldn’t risk letting go of her defenses—not yet, if ever.
She turned suddenly. What was that? A noise. She backed towards one of the lights and felt a soft brush against her cheek like a lover’s kiss.
Longing ground down into the pit of her stomach. She turned to find moths—huge, beautiful in their moonlight colors, silver, grey and luminescent green—flitting together in the glare and warmth of the light, drawn together in an instinctive, life-long quest to find their mates.
One fluttered once more against her hair and she drew back away from the light, mesmerized by its beauty and persistence. She edged back one more step and then turned, drawn irresistibly to face the path once more.
“Cassandra.” His voice was low, barely heard but felt with a force that made her stagger back.
“Dallas!” She could feel the blood drain from her face as a wave of sick shock swept her body at seeing him before her, unheard, undetected.
“Expecting someone else?”
“No, I…” her voice faded away. Talking was impossible through her suddenly dry throat and Dallas’s appearance had driven all thought from her head.
“Couldn’t sleep?”
She shook her head.
“A walk before work, then?”
She swallowed and gulped in the cool air. “I don’t usually go for pre-dawn bush walks with my luggage.” She flicked him a rueful, uncomfortable smile.
“You’re leaving then.”
She was struck by his tone: low, resigned, disappointed somehow.
She nodded. “I have a taxi coming.”
“Can I ask why?”
“I think you know why.”
“And you’d leave without a word?”
“There’s nothing to say. I’ve done some good work for you. Left my resignation on the desk. I hardly thought you’d object, you couldn’t even bear to see me yesterday.” She couldn’t prevent a bitter tone creeping into her voice.
He turned his head quickly to one side, his mouth a hard line, his hands pushed into his pockets as if for control.
“Come on. I’ve been busy. And you would hardly have welcomed by presence.”
“It had to be professional. Not personal.” The latter words she added in a lower tone.
“You showed me that it’s all personal. That everything we do touches someone.”
She jerked her head up to his, seeing him standing closer to her. “I have to go. I can’t take this now.”
He took a step closer still. “You must listen. I don’t want you to go. I—”
“Yes?”
She paused waiting for him to continue. But there was no response. She stepped away.
“I need you.”
She stopped, dead in her tracks.
She turned to him. He hadn’t moved. He still stood, filling the narrow streak of light with his dark presence. She could sense he was holding back. She knew his instinct would have been to act, to follow her with the intention of physically making sure she returned with him. But he controlled that instinct. He didn’t move. He was giving her the choice.
His restraint melted her intentions like a soft kiss on a worried brow. She dropped her bag.
“What did you say?”
He stepped towards her then, into the light, and she could see the winged creases around his mouth crinkle as he tried not to smile.
“You’re not going to make this easy for me are you Cassandra? I said, I need you.”
“You need me?”
“I need you.” His smile vanished as quickly as it had arrived and he glanced down briefly at the path before raising his eyes to hers once more. “I need you to be my PA. It won’t get personal again, I promise. I won’t let that happen. I need you with me, because—we work well together. Besides I haven’t time to recruit another PA, it’ll take too long.”
She knew him. Knew his self delusion: knew his inability to face his emotions. She also knew that she loved this man and could not leave until she discovered the truth about the events that led to the deaths of her son and father. She had to stay, to find out how exactly Dallas was implicated in the tragedy that had blown her family to pieces. If Dallas meant what he said, he’d keep his distance. He’d give her the time she needed to discover the truth.
“On a professional basis only?”
“Professional only. You have my word.”
He extended his hand and gripped hers.
The power of his touch sent trails of heat blazing through her hand and body.
“It’s a deal.” She said huskily, hoping that they weren’t making a deal that neither of them could keep.
The bush lightened innocently around them as they returned to the house. Gone was the brooding elemental gloom that reduced life to the essentials. The soft light tamed it, made it manageable once more.
Rational thought returned and Dallas was relieved. He had no time for all this emotional stuff. Personal or business. It was all the same to him. The thought of her leaving was just, well, untenable. Having her by his side was right. And that was all there was to it.
He adjusted his step to Cassandra’s. She was walking slowly: tired, he assumed. He held back a stray fern for her, briefly glimpsing the delicate lines of her nose and cheekbones, highlighted by the blush of early morning sun.
He simply needed her. He couldn’t explain it any better. Searching for words was like groping in the dark, in an unknown place, for something he’d never seen before. There was little point when he knew what he wanted. Her. And he knew what he had to do to keep her—engage her brain rather than her body.
He closed the gate, leaving the cool bush behind them and the garden, flooded with rosy light, spread before them.
They walked like strangers side by side up the brick path towards the house
whose windows shone in the new light.
“I’m giving you responsibility for new business. I’ll get Jen to cover the routine PA work. The first presentation is this morning. There’s some proposals to work on and then there’s some work coming up with Bill Northam. He’s an old family friend. It’s good, solid business. I thought you’d appreciate that for a change.”
“Sounds good to me. What time is the first presentation?”
“Ten. You’d better use the next few hours before breakfast to prepare.”
“I’ll be ready.”
He caught his breath at the sight of her hair curling like a halo of light around her face and then looked ahead firmly.
“Make sure you are.”
CHAPTER NINE
The house was still quiet. Cassandra had come to love the early morning starts. Alone in her office she had time to collect her thoughts and find some peace.
She’d agreed to stay over two months ago and she’d not regretted her decision. He’d kept his distance, believing that was the only reason she stayed. But he was wrong. She’d stayed because she loved him and wanted to discover the secrets surrounding the acquisition of her family’s business. She had yet to find out the truth, but time had just run out. She had to leave. She was pregnant.
She rubbed her forehead.
She had thought she could continue working with him until she was discovered. But the pregnancy test showed otherwise.
She had to go. He had made it clear that he wanted no-one in his life long term, woman or child. She lightly caressed her stomach. But it would be a new chance for her. A sister or brother for Danny. A fresh start. In the meantime, she had a meeting to attend.
Dallas jumped into the external elevator just as Cassandra was on her way to the boardroom to meet Bill Northam. Horizontal rain slashed the harbor as she switched her eyes from the view to the elevator buttons.
“Which floor?”
“Same as you.”
She smiled at him. “I can manage, thank you Dallas.”
He smiled, the same, ironic smile back. “I’m sure you can, Cassandra. But as it happens I’d like to say hello to Bill again. Then I’ll leave you two to get down to business.”
He held the door open for her and followed her across the plushly carpeted foyer to the boardroom, where an elderly gentleman sat, dapper in a pin-striped suit, complete with a wide-brimmed Akubra hat. A huge grin split across Bill Northam’s face at the sight of Dallas.
“Dallas! How are you my boy?”
He welcomed Dallas like a son, engulfing him in a bear hug and slapping his back.
“Very well, Bill. Good to see you out and about again. Got some new business I hear?”
“Can’t keep an old dog down.” Bill guffawed; his pleasure at seeing Dallas again was obvious.
Cassandra wondered how far back they went.
“Glad to hear it. Bill, meet Cassandra Lee. She’s my new PA/Project Manager who will be working with you on the business. I need her to make sure you don’t pull the wool over my eyes.”
“You certainly wouldn’t want to be blind with this beautiful young lady around. How are you my dear?”
Cassandra felt an unaccustomed blush rising.
“Very well thank you, sir. I’m looking forward to working with you. I’ve done a little research and think I can see where we can add value to your present portfolio.”
Bill winked at Dallas. “Brains and beauty. Only the best eh, Dallas?”
Dallas smiled back at his old friend, without looking at Cassandra.
“I’ll meet you and Cassandra upstairs in the apartment later and we’ll have dinner. It’ll be easier for you than braving the weather. It looks like a storm’s brewing.”
“Very thoughtful of you, Dallas. Mind you, a storm is never far away in Wellington.” He sat back down and gave Dallas an exaggerated salute. Give my regards to your mother. Still on the Mainland?”
“Still in Glencoe, yes. She prefers the seclusion.”
For the first time, the big grin on Bill’s face drooped. “Yes,” he said thoughtfully. “Probably wants some peace and quiet after what she’s been through, if you don’t mind me saying.”
Cassandra felt Dallas’s gaze drop to her briefly before returning to Bill.
“Old friends, Bill. You can speak your mind with me.”
“Only way to do it, my boy. My memory’s too bad for prevaricating. Can’t remember what my story was. So best to keep it simple. You go on. I think I’m in very capable hands with Cassandra. Off you go son.”
After three hours with Bill, discussing different projects and strategies, Cassandra didn’t believe Bill suffered any decline, mental or otherwise. Or if he did, she wouldn’t want to have done business with him before. He was as sharp as they came and she’d learned a lot.
“Shall we call it a day, sir?”
“Bill. Please call me Bill. Yes, I think we ought. I’m not as young as I was. So tell me, are you enjoying working with Dallas Mackenzie?”
Cassandra busied herself with collecting the various investment statements and documents together. “Of course. The portfolio is varied and interesting.”
Bill leaned closer to her. “No my dear. I mean do you enjoy it? He’s a good man you know. He’s not his father, for all the similarities. Not that he knows that.”
Bill paused, his gaze focusing on the mid distance. Cassandra shrugged as she closed down the laptop. Bill’s gaze, instantly alert, switched to her.
“Not that you’d know Dallas’s father, would you?”
“No. Dallas doesn’t talk of him and I believe he’s dead.”
“Yep. Six months ago. The drink finally got him.” Bill shook his head. “Sad. He was a man with great potential and did great things in his time. But the drink was his failing. Drink, frustration. Married the wrong woman.” A shadow of sadness passed across Bill’s face until he looked once more into Cassandra’s own curious gaze.
“Six months ago?” It was six months ago that her life had changed. And the fact that tragedy had befallen Dallas’s life at the same time, struck her forcibly.
Bill nodded. “Yes. Nasty business. Dallas and his father never got on, as you probably know. But Dallas always gave him a second chance, and a third chance. They all came to nothing. The last chance was when he persuaded Dallas to let him look into a small takeover in Boston he’d got a bee in his bonnet about. Seemed he’d had dealings with the owner some years before.” Bill pursed his lips and shrugged. “Dallas was just pleased to have shot of him for a few months. He never imagined that his father would pursue an old feud and destroy this man’s life.” He shook his head. “Of course, there was no going back once his father had done the deed. Dallas had to sort it out with James’s help. The company was rotten through and through and all Dallas could do was sell it off in parts in the hope of salvaging some of the investment. Dallas’s father died in his sleep shortly afterwards. A stroke, I believe.”
Cassandra froze. Aghast, she listened to the inevitable.
“Apparently the owner shot himself. Nasty business. It seems he’d been trying to cover up the rotten accounts for some time. But, out of respect to the remaining family, Dallas insisted it be hushed up.”
“Dallas’s father’s mistake,” echoed Cassandra, the words formed stiffly on her lips.
“That’s right. Not that Dallas looked at it that way. He blamed himself for the whole mess, furious at himself for letting his father make such a blunder. He couldn’t have known though. No-one could. Frank deceived everybody, every day of his life. And he made his poor wife’s and sons’ lives hell.”
Bill gazed out across the stormy harbor, shaking his head. Cassandra was thankful his entire focus was on the Mackenzie family and their misfortunes and he was totally unaware of the effect his news was having on her.
She rolled her chair away from the table and rose, pushing herself up unsteadily. She moved deliberately and picked up some coffee cups and deposited them on the trolley at
the far end of the room. She stood there, clutching the cold steel handles of the trolley and seeing only Danny’s face, feeling only Danny’s need. She rubbed her hands together in an effort to stem the physical pain that pushed through every vein, every nerve ending in her body. She looked up at the ceiling in an effort to contain the flow of tears and took a deep breath before turning back to Bill.
She returned to the table aware that, despite the pain, she felt intense relief. Dallas was innocent. He was guilty only of giving his father one last chance. The man who she should have been targeting had died shortly afterwards. She took a deep breath and focused on the papers in front of her.
Bill suddenly turned. “While ago now though. And I just hope that Dallas has put it behind him. He’s got you now to help him, hasn’t he?” He peered short-sightedly at her. “Are you well my dear? You’re the color of chalk.”
Cassandra plumbed the depths of her control and retrieved a bright smile. “Hungry, that’s all. Let’s go and meet Dallas.”
Cassandra felt as though a light had been lit in her heart. Sadness still dwelled there but not the heavy, suffocating, maddening fear that accompanied it. That was there no more, lifted with Bill’s words.
With each step she made towards Dallas’s penthouse, half-listening to Bill’s conversation, offering an arm when his stiff limbs needed some assistance, Cassandra rejoiced.
Flashbacks filled her mind: of Dallas as they’d first met: cool, inscrutable—the ubiquitous strong man.
Of Dallas, affectionate and concerned at the pool.
Of Dallas, his body on top of hers, driving her into an ecstasy that was all-consuming.
She allowed herself for the first time to think of the man untainted by doubt, of the integrity and kindness that lay beneath the hard exterior. She allowed her love for him to flood her body with its heat and intensity without restraint and to command her heart unchecked. All her instincts had been proved correct. While she’d always known, deep down, that he was innocent, she’d never permitted herself to surrender completely to her feelings. Now she could.