by Allie Adams
For the love of Christ. He couldn't be serious. Judging by that cool look in his hard gaze, he was deadly serious.
“And you're certain the boy is out there on his own? There's no fourth kidnapper?”
“There's no intel to support a fourth kidnapper.”
Spencer continued toward the Com Van. He knew Weber had more intel than he shared with the team. Why would he hide anything from them? It made no sense. They were a team. A brotherhood. They didn't keep secrets from each other, especially on a find and even more so that it involved a kid.
“Allen?” Weber said in warning.
“I'm just going to check in,” he shot back gruffly.
“Need to know only.”
Spencer spun and nailed his superior with a glare. “I get it.”
Weber lifted his brow as his expression fell slack. Oh, shit. Spencer's heart hit his feet when Weber smiled. “Hold up.”
Gessler laughed and jabbed Snyder in the ribs. “Nice knowing you, Allen.”
“You two do a perimeter sweep,” Weber barked at them.
Perimeter sweep? Spencer stiffened. Why would they need a perimeter sweep at base camp for a little boy lost out in the forest? That sealed it. Weber didn't believe his own bullshit story. Now he knew he had to tell Kathryn. He would not put her in any danger.
“Yes, sir.” Gessler even bowed and laughed again when Weber glared at him.
Spencer held his position as Weber approached. He then grabbed Spencer by the back of the neck and squeezed as he led him further away from the rest of the team. “Let's take a walk.”
He tensed as the unease he'd been feeling grew inside him. Dead kidnappers? Perimeter sweeps? Now a talk away from his team? Something didn't add up.
“Do you like your job as a TREX field agent, Allen?”
That was a loaded question if he'd ever heard one. He also knew better than to answer it. Weber's lectures were legendary. He could trap the best agent without effort. Aside from wanting to tell Kathryn more than Weber wanted him to, Spencer couldn't honestly figure out what he'd done to deserve one of Weber's lectures.
Well, aside from the whole snapping at his superior thing.
Weber went on. “You have your own team. Snyder is one hell of a bartender. Did you know that? And McKoy has an older sister who puts Aims to shame on a computer. Lyons is looking at buying a sailboat. Cummings only wears white pajamas and plays in his Zen sand garden when he's not on a find.”
“That's…” he paused, thinking of what to say. “Interesting.”
Weber tossed him a smug look. “You didn't know that about any of them, did you?”
“No.” And he didn't give a shit. They didn't know anything personal about him, either. He purposely kept them at distance for their own protection. If they knew nothing personal about him, they'd never crack and hemorrhage the information to the enemy. Why the hell would Weber think that was a bad thing?
“And yet they all know your entire history with that feisty redhead. Why do you think that is?”
Okay, so maybe he hadn't done such a good job at keeping them at a distance. Something told him Weber already knew that. “Not sure, sir.”
Weber set his jaw. “Because you can't keep your fucking personal life out of your job. You're one of the most even-keeled agents I have working under me. I trust your gut when I don't even trust mine. You were born with dead-on instincts. Most people can't learn that shit. You either have it or you don't. You, Allen, have it.”
“Uh, thank you?”
Weber's grip on Spencer's neck tightened. “So when I see you fucking all that up, it bothers me. Having one of my own agents challenge me in front of the rest of the team really bothers me.”
Spencer wasn't about to apologize for it. But he got the message. “Yes, sir.”
“Kathryn Davis is one hell of a SAR coordinator. The best TREX has ever partnered with. But she's not the only private SAR firm out there. If having her working so closely with us messes with one of my best agents, I have to do something about that. Do you understand what I'm saying?”
Loud and clear. “You want me to calm the fuck down.”
“See?” Weber patted him on the back. “Instincts, Allen.”
“Yes, sir.” He felt five years old being reprimanded like this, but Weber was right. Spencer knew better than to challenge the chain of command. Weber deserved more respect than that. He was a hell of a great leader. Spencer had no right to question that.
And yet, as his gut churned, he couldn't help it. “Weber, something isn't adding up. I know you feel it. Why aren't you pursuing it? There has to be a fourth kidnapper in on this. If there's another player out there with the kid, hiding him from us, Kathryn needs to know. Her teams could be in danger. We need to read her in.”
“We were hired to find Tommy Miller. He's the job, not playing nice with your ex. Like it or not, she's a competing agency with TREX. We both find things. Her finds are focused on people. Ours are on threats.”
“Then why did we bring her in on this?”
“To use her resources,” he stated matter-of-factly. “This is her specialty. It would have taken us hours just to identify the right agents for the job and another several hours to get them into the field. K-SAR has the manpower at their disposal we need to find Tommy Miller before it's too late. But with every competing agency, we have to be careful on how much intel we share with them.”
Spencer had never understood that. “We're all on the same side. What do you think will happen if I tell her the truth? She has a right to know.”
“Does she?” Weber countered. “She's a civilian who started a private SAR firm. She's never been through agency training. She's never been taught how to recognize valuable intel from bullshit. She could end up leaking the information without even realizing it. Some of the intel we pick up is dangerous. We're trained on how to identify and eliminate threats. A civilian is not. The less you tell your ex, the less danger you put her in.”
Goddamn it. He was right. It made perfect sense and Spencer hated that it did, especially since it came from his SAC. He should have been able to put that together on his own.
The Com Van door opened and Kathryn stepped out. The light caught her red hair and made it glow. She searched the base camp until her gaze landed on him. Her cheeks flushed as she motioned for him to join her.
“It sucks,” Weber pointed out the obvious as he nodded at her. “I get it. That's why none of us have steady women. We have enough shit to deal with without the added stress of even more lies.”
Spencer hated the double standard, and hated even more that Weber seemed okay with it. “I understand.”
“Keep your radio on VOX. I want to monitor all radio traffic.”
No, he wanted to make sure Spencer didn't say anything to Kathryn. It pissed him off that his SAC didn't trust him. “Yes, sir.”
Spencer started in the direction of the Com Van, his chest tight. He hated lying to her even more than he already had but had no choice in order to protect her. When he reached her, he followed her gaze as Weber disappeared back into the woods.
“Was that Dan Weber?”
“Yes.”
She lifted her pretty brow. “Calling in the big guns?”
Shit. Shit. She was always so damn perceptive. “Like I said, Tommy Miller's grandfather has a long reach.”
“I'll bet.”
“Did you need something?” He didn't trust himself with her for too long. Those icy blue eyes sliced into him and weakened his resolve.
“I, uh…” Kathryn glanced around and then reached for something behind her, bringing out a handheld radio. “I wanted to make sure you had some way to contact me—my communications officer, I mean—if your team found anything.”
“You think we're conducting our own search in parallel?”
She looked at him. “Of course you are.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“Because that's exactly what I'd do.” She went to close the door to the Com Van
but stopped and swung back out. “Spencer? We're on the same team here, working toward the same goal. There's no such thing as over communicating. I plan to share everything with TREX. All I ask is that you offer me the same courtesy.”
Son of a bitch. He forced a nod and nothing else. “Understood.”
Her voice softened as she gave him a hint of a smile. “Would you like to come in? We have the heater going.”
“I'm fine.”
“Your lips are blue.”
He chuckled. “Thanks, but I really should be getting back.”
“Okay. Spencer?”
He braced himself. She was being too nice. He knew better than to trust that she'd had a sudden change of heart. “Yeah?”
“You'd tell me if you had information about this search that would alter its outcome, wouldn't you?”
The honesty in her expression, swirling in those beautiful eyes, tore at his soul. God, he couldn't do this. Guilt weighed on him. He wanted to talk to her, he really did. But Weber was right.
The less she knew the better.
SIX
Kat fought the disappointment squeezing at her heart. It would take more than offering Spencer a radio before he'd open up about this search. He was hiding something. She just didn't know what.
Why did he just stand there? He kept glancing at the Com Van, then toward the woods the TREX agents hid in, and then back. Something bothered the hell out of him. She wished he'd talk to her.
Maybe she should talk to him instead.
“I'm going mobile,” she announced to her communications officer and grabbed the handheld radio Spencer refused. As she left the Com Van, closing the door behind her, the noise caught his attention and he turned to face her. He watched her approach, his gaze never faltering, even when she slowed. He had the power to hold her right at the edge of sanity with nothing more than a look. A tight swirl of energy coiled around her womb, tantalizing her with muscle spasms centering between her legs.
How did he do that?
On any other TREX agent, no one would bother a second glance at the way the black outfit hugged his muscular frame. On Spencer it looked downright wicked. He could pose for one of those hot male calendars and never even have to remove the shirt.
And Kat would buy every last one.
The shirt displayed his bulging arms and hard, tight abs. If only she could see him without it on. She loved his chest and let out a petulant sigh that it was hidden.
For some insane reason, the way he held himself, his broad shoulders squared and flawlessly poised, he appeared at least seven feet tall. He couldn't be any taller than his six feet three inch frame allowed, and deep down she knew that, but he seemed so much larger at that moment.
At five feet nine inches, she was by no means a small woman, but Spencer dwarfed her. With him, she felt safe, protected, and her body always tingled in a heightened state of arousal.
A shudder ripped through her. She conjured up the memory of their last time together. Him lying next to her, possessively holding her close, their bodies hot and wet with perspiration after a frenzied lovemaking. The walls of her vagina tightened at the vivid memory, sending chills up her spine. Her heart slammed against her ribcage as if she'd just run a mile uphill.
Not once did his gaze stray from her as she continued to close the distance, and his unmoving stare warmed her entire body. Too warm. If possible he was even sexier than her memory allowed. He shrugged, moving those immense muscles, and Kat opened her mouth to release a sigh.
How could a simple gesture like a shrug excite her? When he coupled it with that gleam of obstinate hunger in his eyes, she shifted, feeling dirty as she mentally undressed him, and too damn horny to ignore her reaction to him. If he met her half way to capture her mouth with his, to plunge his tongue deep into her mouth, she wouldn't even hint at a protest.
His features held an inherent strength that she wished she shared right now. She could use a little boost. His jaw tensed visibly once she stopped in front of him, and his shoulders seemed to square, always ready for the next attack.
Kat fought off the urge to tear into him like a worried spouse. From the way he stood, his stance solid, he expected her to do just that.
So, instead she flashed the friendliest smile she could muster up on such short notice. “Hi there.”
He answered with an impersonal nod and narrowed his gaze, clearly suspicious of her sudden change in attitude.
“What are you doing?”
He shrugged. She watched as his gaze traced the Black Hills surrounding them.
“It sure is beautiful out here,” she offered when he didn't speak.
Near the southern end of Puget Sound, the Black Hills rose over half a mile high. The conifers blanketing the hills offered shelter from the capricious elements. She loved it up here, just not when she had to find a subject lost in the midst of it all. And when the fog set in, a regular occurrence in western Washington, she'd be lucky if she'd be able to see her hand in front of her face, let alone navigate the land. A six-year-old little boy didn't stand a chance out here alone.
She studied Spencer, wondering what he had going on in that handsome head of his that had him so distracted. Looking at him now, how the lines on his face deepened with each passing moment, she saw for the first time how much of a toll their breakup took on him. She folded her arms in front of her to stop herself from reaching out to him.
As his stormy eyes searched hers, he asked, “How's our progress?”
“Slow. But if you'd just talk to me and tell me what you know, I could direct my teams better.”
Spencer shook his head, straightened and leaned closer to her. The warmth of his breath tickled across her lips and it made hers catch in response. Standing like this, she could easily lean in and kiss him. Licking her lips, Kat sucked her lower lip between her teeth to stop herself from doing exactly that.
“Don't rely on what I know. You're the expert, Kathryn. There's a reason why TREX called you in on this. You're the best SAR coordinator out there.”
She lowered her eyes and pulled back. Her arousal settled down as she focused on the search and not on her need for him. “I used to be.”
“Your instincts have never been wrong.”
“Sure they have. The last time we were together, the search—”
“Wasn't your fault,” he cut her off, his voice low and thick with sincerity.
There it was, the one thing she'd been waiting a year to hear from him. Harsh reality twisted in her heart. It didn't fix anything like she thought it would. She knew the truth. That search was her fault. A rescue turned recovery. Nothing he could say would change that. She realized that now.
Spencer sighed hard before adjusting his earpiece. He then switched off the mic against his neck. “There. Now we can actually talk.”
“Were we being monitored?”
He nodded. “I'll get my ass chewed for turning off my radio, but there are some things Weber doesn't need to know. I need to talk to you without worrying about whether I'm going to end up in front of the board at TREX again.”
She sucked in a breath, hating that his own agency nearly kicked him out, all because he got involved with the head of a competing agency. “I'm sorry about that.”
“It was my choice.”
“Spence—”
“We don't have much time. I've worked with you enough, Kathryn. I know your abilities, what you can do. Work your magic. Put yourself in the kid's frame of mind. You've got firsthand experience at this.”
“I was ten when I got lost. And only a few miles from my house.”
“And yet it still took the teams two days to find you.”
Two days of hell, of absolute terror. She'd never been so scared in her life, then and now. Hell, she had to sleep with a nightlight because of it.
Not enough resources, she'd heard them tell her father when he demanded answers on why it took search and rescue so long to find her. Those three words still resonated with her and sen
t chills scattering across her skin. When she worked for the state and had those same destructive words tossed at her, something snapped. She refused to accept that as an answer. As an excuse.
And K-SAR was born.
No other person—man, woman, or six-year-old little boy lost in the mountains—would ever have to hear those words. Not if she could help it.
“Channel everything you remember from your own search and combine that with what you know now. You've got the most organized National Incident Management System out there. No one knows NIMS the way you do.” He searched her eyes. The determination in his tone settled into his gaze.
“I don't know if it will help with this one. It doesn't fit any of the scenarios or any of the profiles I used to create my own NIMS. It's like Tommy isn't even out here.”
He straightened as cold purpose hardened in his expression and darkened his eyes. “He's out here. He's got to be.”
“Why? Because you want him to be?”
“Because—” he stopped. His lips thinned.
“What are you hiding from me?”
He closed in and left her no room at all, trapping her with his large hands on her shoulders. She couldn't pull back as he moved in, his lips a breath away from hers. His intense gaze paralyzed her. Fear and lust enveloped her.
“Just. Find. Him.” His intense whisper caught in her senses.
She doubled up her fists. “Then help me! Tell me what you know.”
“I can't.”
Damn him. “You can't? Or you won't?”
“I can't.”
“Then I'm going to Weber.”
He let out a long sigh and went back to the original position she found him in, his gaze raised to the sky as he muttered something about her stubborn side being a pain in the ass. “He's not going to tell you anything I haven't already told you. I'll probably get my ass busted for telling you as much as I have.”
“But you haven't told me anything! Every single detail about this search I've gotten by guessing and reading your reaction.” She sighed and allowed the silence to build between them, her mind retracing the search thus far. They weren't going to get anywhere fighting over withheld information. Once she finished with him, she'd track down Dan Weber, TREX Special Agent in Charge, and get him to talk. He may be Spencer's boss, but he was nothing more to Kat than a man with the answers.