Only In My Dreams: Halle Pumas, Book 5

by Dana Marie Bell

  He sighed. “I’m sorry, but I can’t.”

  “Oh.” She bit back her disappointment. At least he was speaking to her.

  “I’m at the airport.”

  What? “Is everything all right?”

  “Everything’s…different.”

  That didn’t sound good. His voice sounded weary and strained, not surprising considering what had happened a few days ago. “Different how?”

  “I’m going away for a little while.” She could hear the noises of an airport in the background and assumed it was Philadelphia International.

  “Oh.”

  “Sarah. You know you’re mine, right?”

  Yes! “I know.” She’d known the moment she’d seen him. Everything in her had yearned towards him, but she’d understood why he’d held off on claiming her. He’d needed all of his focus to be on Sheri, not Sarah. She’d been proud of him for it.

  “I can’t claim you yet. It’s complicated. I won’t be able to claim you for a while.”

  Her heart sank. She’d been looking forward to having someone of her own, someone who might understand some of the strange things that had been happening to her lately. “Why not?”

  “I’ve been tapped to replace a Hunter for our region.”

  Pride swelled within her, along with fear. Being a Hunter was no easy job. “Oh wow. Gabe! That’s…scary. Incredible, but really scary.”

  He laughed. “Yeah, that pretty much sums it up. Seems a rogue took one down in our area and the Senate’s decided I’m the one to replace him.”

  “Is the Pride in danger?”

  “No, baby. Halle is safe. He’s operating out of New York state.” The warmth in his voice went far in melting the chill that had enveloped her.

  “You’ll do fine, Gabe.” She blinked. That hadn’t been what she’d wanted to say at all.

  But it was the right thing to say from the relief in his tone. “I’m glad you understand, baby. This means a great deal to me, more than I thought it would when I got approached. It means when something like Parker happens again I can act without any fear of reprisals from Packs, Prides or Dens.”

  She settled back down on the bed. No point in getting up early on a Saturday if there was no one she had to see and nowhere to go. “How did Adrian and Max react to this? Are they all right with it?”

  “Once they got away from their mates for a few seconds they were okay with it. Max actually drove me to the airport.”

  She stifled the hurt that he hadn’t asked her to drive him. “I could have taken you.”

  Silence. Not good. “I couldn’t let you do that, Sarah.”

  “Why not?”

  “If I had been in a car with you for two hours I would never have gotten on that plane.”

  The rough rasp of his voice played over her senses. It was nice to know that he wanted her just as much as…she… “Where are you?”

  “Right now? Somewhere near Chicago.”

  “Somewhere near Chicago. Not actually in Chicago.” Liar. She just knew he was in Chicago, not that it mattered.

  He gave another rough sigh. “Sarah. Please. Tell me you understand why I’m doing this.”

  She rubbed her hand over her eyes wearily. “I do understand what you’re doing, but I don’t like that you wouldn’t even see me before you left.”

  “I told you why. I didn’t think it was fair to either one of us to be marked before I left. I have to have my mind in the game, not on my mate.”

  That hurt. She understood, really she did, but it still hurt. “All right.”

  More silence. “That’s it?”

  “What do you want me to say, Gabe? I understand. I don’t agree, but I understand. What’s going to happen the first time you go on a hunt though? Are you going to regret leaving me behind then, too?”

  “I’m hoping the first time I have to go on a hunt the first flush of mating will be over and we’ll be long since settled.”

  She thought about that for a moment. There wasn’t anything more she could say about it. What was done was done. “When will you be back?”

  She was beginning to hate those little silences. It meant she wasn’t going to like his answer. “Six months, roughly.”

  She was right. She didn’t like the answer. “Damn.”

  “I’m sorry, baby. I did what I thought was best.”

  She suppressed a growl. If he’d spoken to her before leaving she could have corrected that little assumption, but it was too late now. “Call me.”

  “I will. I promise.”

  January

  “Shhh. Not a sound. Do you understand me?”

  She nodded, her eyes lowered submissively as she knelt before him.

  “Good girl.” Gabe reached out and ran his hands over Sarah’s soft, short hair lightly enough to cause a shudder to run through her. He smiled and tilted her chin up, loving the wary heat in her deep brown eyes. “You’re going to do everything I tell you to do. Aren’t you?”

  One brow rose in mild challenge before a sassy smile crossed her full, pouty lips. He growled and tapped one finger to his thigh, pleased when she once again lowered her eyes. Her smile changed, becoming mysterious and feminine. It intrigued him. Everything about her intrigued him.

  “Put your hands behind your back.”

  She complied slowly. Her lashes fluttered and her breath quickened. They’d done this before. She knew what it was he wanted. He slipped his cock out of his uniform pants, stroking it slowly. A groan nearly escaped his lips when she licked her own, moistening them and making them gleam in the candlelight. He painted her lips with the tip of his cock, the drop of pre-come glistening there like gloss. “Open up.”

  She opened her mouth, her tongue darting out to lick just the tip of his cock. He put his hand on the back of her head, holding her steady as he fed her his dick. He began fucking her mouth, losing some of his tight control and groaning at the wet heat. “That’s it, baby.” She choked a bit and he backed off a little, proud of her for holding steady despite it.

  He was close, so close, but he didn’t want to come in her mouth. Not tonight. Tonight he wanted that sweet, hot pussy wrapped around him, pulling his orgasm out of him.

  He withdrew from her mouth, stroking her hair as she pouted up at him. “Stand up.” She complied, lowering her eyes once more, her hands still behind her back. “Lie down on the bed.”

  She looked up at him, startled. He lifted his chin, pointing to the big, dark bed right behind her. He didn’t understand how she could have missed it. It dominated the room they were in.

  She crawled onto the bed on all fours, giving him an amazing view of that incredible ass of hers. He halted her, hands on her hips, and nipped one of her white globes, loving the shiver that ran through her. He slapped her lightly on the ass, smiling wickedly as a pink mark rose up. “Middle of the bed, on your back.”

  She moved the way he directed, settling down with a final shimmy that caused her breasts to dance.

  “Spread your arms and legs.” She bit her lip but complied, slowly showing him the liquid heat between her thighs.

  He reached down and tied each one of her limbs, careful to make sure none of the bindings were too tight on her slender frame. When he was done, he looked at her, knowing exactly what the feral look on his face would do to her.

  He watched as she swallowed nervously. She tugged at the restraints, testing them.

  He began a slow exploration of her body, stroking her soft flesh until goose bumps rose on her skin. He licked at her pert nipples, watching her squirm under him. When he sucked her clit into his mouth she bucked against him. She was lucky he hadn’t told her to hold still, or that would have earned her a spanking.

  He could hear her gasping for breath and he knew she was close to coming. He slid up her body, thrusting inside her so hard she whimpered.

  He grinned. “That’s two.”

  Her golden eyes went wide. It was the hottest fucking thing he’d ever seen, watching her dark eyes turn t
awny. She always managed to hold off the change until he was fucking her, letting him watch it happen while he was deep inside her body. He was proud at the measure of control it took to keep the Puma at bay for that long, while at the same time he was desperate to break it. “Keep your eyes open.” Her lids drooped in a sensuous daze but didn’t close as he pounded into her. She kept her gaze locked on his, her arms and legs struggling futilely against the bonds he had her in. He reached down, stroking her clit with his thumb, snarling in triumph as she screeched. He leaned over her, whispering in her ear. “That’s three.” Her body bowed up, quivering at the force of her orgasm.

  She nipped his earlobe as her body settled back onto the mattress and he came, the pleasure so intense it robbed him of breath. He collapsed on top of her, his cheek resting against hers, his whiskers abrading her sleek skin.

  One salty tear wound down her cheek to fall against his. “Where are you?”

  He lifted his head. Sorrow filled her face, his heart nearly ripping in two at the sight. “Sarah. Baby.”

  Gabe woke up sweating and horny as all hell. He started to whip the sleeping bag open but remembered in time that he was in a tent in the middle of a snowy field. Fuck. If it wasn’t for the fact that so far he loved what he was doing, this job would suck. Part of him wished he’d told James to fuck off and claimed Sarah the way he’d wanted to. The other part knew James was probably right, that it would have been ten times worse to taste Sarah and leave her behind.

  He punched his pillow and prayed he’d be able to sleep without any more dreams. James snored beside him, loud enough to rattle the insulated cloth. If I get back to sleep at all.

  After about twenty minutes he gave up. Stripping quickly, he unzipped the tent and slipped out into the night. It was fucking cold, but it wouldn’t be for much longer. Shivering, he zipped the tent back up and made sure it was secure before he shifted and allowed his Puma out to run.

  His paws dug into the snow, the cold air rushing past his whiskers. It felt glorious to let his Puma out without the presence of the Bear who was training him. He’d have to go back all too soon, but for now he’d allow the night air to wash the dreams of his Sarah away.

  Chapter Two

  March

  Gabe shivered and pulled off his parka. Damn, this last hunting lesson had been harsh. He wasn’t certain he’d ever feel his toes again. “I’m going to call Max, let him know how things are going.”

  James waved, hanging up his cowboy hat and heading towards the kitchen of his three-bedroom cabin. He’d promised Gabe a nice thick stew in return for learning snow tracking.

  Gabe hung up the parka and pulled off his snow-encrusted boots, leaving them on the mat by the door. It had become routine in the last three months. James hated wet floors. The last time Gabe had forgotten to leave his boots on the mat he’d found them in his bed, snow and all.

  He pulled out his cell phone and dialed Max. “Hey, Max.”

  “Gabe! How’s it going out in the Montana wilderness?”

  “Fucking cold. How’re things in Halle?” How’s Sarah?

  “Fucking cold.”

  Gabe snorted. “I’m learning some new tracking techniques.” He’d need them in the winter months in New York. He’d be heading there soon with James to spend a couple of weeks. So far he’d been all over the territory he’d be protecting, learning the land in a way only a solitary shifter could. He’d never know it as well as a native, but he’d be able to track the different terrains he’d be dealing with. He’d met the other two Hunters, a young Fox named Desiree Holt and an older Coyote named Edmund Graves. Both had interesting insights into the areas where they lived. Desiree lived in New Jersey; Graves lived in New York City. Gabe had been surprised when he heard that. Coyotes and Wolves didn’t get along very well. To learn there was a Coyote Pack that close to Rick’s Wolves had startled him. Afterwards James had taken him back to his home in Montana to learn what he called “real snow tracking”.

  Gabe’s responsibility would mostly be to the Pennsylvania area, but he’d be called to assist the others whenever needed and vice versa. With luck he’d never need to.

  Daniel, the Hunter who’d been killed, had also been a Fox and a friend of Desiree’s. She’d been instrumental in bringing the rogue who’d killed him to justice.

  “I even have the secret handshake now.” The amused snort from the kitchen let him know James could hear everything. “I can call in the other Hunters if someone like Rudy ever shows his snout in Halle again.” The growl from the other room reminded him of his place. “Or anywhere else in Pennsylvania.”

  “Good. Adrian and Sheri want you to call them, by the way.”

  “Will do.” He didn’t know them well enough to miss them yet, but he and Adrian had developed a rapport that would only grow stronger with time. Before too long he expected his relationship with Adrian would be similar to the one Max shared with Simon, his Beta.

  “And Emma says bring her back something, but make sure it doesn’t have antlers or fur.”

  Gabe laughed. Emma was a riot. “Taken care of.” He’d already packed a Kachina doll for the Curana in his luggage for when he returned to Halle. He’d picked it up in Arizona, the current seat of the Senate. “How’s Sarah?”

  Max sighed. “I’m not sure. She knows what you’re doing, but I think she’d feel better if you’d call her and talk to her.”

  “I have.” Many times. Sarah understood what he was doing but was hurt when he wouldn’t tell her where he was. He couldn’t, by shifter law, tell her where he was while he was in Arizona. The Senate’s compound was highly restricted. Only those on Senate business were allowed in or out. Sarah wouldn’t have been able to be with him there even if she knew where it was. Knowing that had eased some of it, but her frustration was slowly building. He could hear it in her voice every time he spoke to her.

  Then he’d been sent to help hunt down the rogue in New York. He hadn’t been able to call until the man was captured and brought to justice. He’d proven to himself that he really did have what it took to be a Hunter. The pride he’d felt at his accomplishment had spilled over when he’d gotten hold of his mate afterwards. Even so, he’d kept to what James had told him, calling Sarah only after he’d left the area. If he’d seen her he’d have claimed her. After all these months of mate dreams nothing would have stopped him.

  The one time he’d managed to get an entire week in Halle she hadn’t even been there. She’d made other plans for the holidays, assuming that he’d be too busy to make the trip to Halle. They’d both been upset by that. If he’d known she’d make other plans he would have told her a lot sooner that he was coming to visit. Hell, who was he kidding? He’d had every intention of marking her ass before an hour in Halle had passed. But he’d decided to surprise her, and instead the surprise was on him when she wasn’t even there.

  As for James’s house, the Bear had refused to allow her to come, saying that she’d be a major distraction for Gabe, who was still in training. He’d compared it to boot camp, saying wives weren’t allowed until after it was over.

  But boot camp only lasted eight weeks, a complaint James had waved off. And to be honest, he was usually too exhausted to do more than eat or sleep. James was working him harder than he’d ever worked before. They’d spent days out in the snow, tracking different shifter volunteers from the Senate. He could track Fox, Coyote, Wolf and Puma now. In fact they’d just come back from one such excursion. The only ones they hadn’t practiced with were Lion, Tiger, Lynx and Jaguar, but James assured him they were up next.

  It killed Gabe to tell Sarah that, no, she couldn’t come visit. She’d been answering her phone less and less, and he’d taken to calling less and less. When they did manage to get in contact with one another their conversations tended to end in stony silence. The only thing that eased his mind was his rapidly growing friendship with the little red-haired waitress from Frank’s Diner. The Fox had offered to keep an eye on his mate in exchange for his hel
p in moving her family to Halle. She’d become a good friend, almost the little sister he’d never had. She was bubbly and happy most of the time, and loved the work she was doing just as much as he did.

  But the mate dreams were killing him. Killing. Him. If she was willing to do half of what he dreamed of he’d be one happy cat.

  Hell, even if she never chose to allow him to indulge his darker side he’d be one happy cat. Still, he hoped to talk her into a few things. Watching her come in his dreams, tied to his bed, blindfolded and begging, couldn’t compare to seeing it for real.

  “I’ll call her tonight. I promise.” And she’d better answer. He was tired of talking to a machine.

  Sarah Parker heard the phone ring and ran for it. One of the bags of groceries slipped, spilling soda all over her floor. “Damn.” She’d have to wait a day to drink that.

  “Hi, this is Sarah. Leave a message after the beep.” Beep.

  “Sarah, it’s Gabe.” A resigned sigh gusted out of the speaker. “Call me.”

  Sarah grabbed the receiver. “Hello!” But he’d already hung up. “Double damn.” He’d sounded so tired. She dialed him back, but his line was busy. She left a message, hoping he’d call her back that night, but knowing that he wouldn’t. He never did.

  She knew what he was doing was important. She wasn’t selfish enough to keep him from that. But why couldn’t he have mated her before he left? Things would have been so much easier. For one thing the fact that she got to hear more about what was going on in his life from fucking Chloe Williams, aka Super Waitress, wouldn’t bother her quite so much. He managed to talk to the redhead way more than he did Sarah, and it was really beginning to bug the shit out of her.

  What really sucked was the fact that he’d managed to get home for Christmas. Unfortunately Sarah hadn’t known he was coming, so she’d made plans to visit her family in Florida. She’d left the day before Gabe arrived in Halle, much to their mutual annoyance.