“Grant, why can’t you talk to me? We’ve been through hell together. We’ve been there for each other always, and now you don’t want that anymore?”
“David, look, I just can’t, alright? I have to deal with this on my own.”
“That’s just it, you don’t have to deal with it on your own. You have two people who care about you. We want to help.”
“Maybe I don’t want help, okay?” I shouted the words louder than I’d intended, but it shocked David so much he shut up at last. I got up and left the room.
We’d gone round and round on this, he wanted me to get back to work, he wanted me to go and see Toni, he wanted me to go out to eat. I couldn’t do it. The world was outside and it was a dangerous place, a place where I might die and leave Toni and David alone. Where they’d have to suffer because someone took my life. If I cut myself off before that, maybe I could save them both some heartache.
I went back to my room and locked my door when I shut it. The carefree guy they’d both known died in that building the day I’d been shot. Now, a coward sat in his place. A coward too afraid to live. I’d tried to shake him off, tried to dig up and resurrect the old Grant, but this one refused to budge. If I didn’t go back to work soon I’d lose my job, but even losing the one thing I’d worked so hard for wouldn’t shift the cowardly, sniveling idiot that had taken over the old Grant.
I hid away instead. I didn’t answer my phone anymore. I didn’t need the women that wanted to come and ‘get me back in the saddle’. That would feel too much like a betrayal of Toni, even if I was trying to drive her away. I didn’t want to visit my old buddies, I didn’t want to see the chief. I just wanted to watch television and be safe in my bed.
I knew David was pushing for a psychiatric evaluation, and so far, the push had saved my job, but I kept canceling the appointments. I’d have to go out for them. I only went out now for my physical therapy. I had to get back on my feet properly, to go back to work, to live. It hadn’t been fair to keep David from going out as often as he liked because he had to take care of me. At least now those assistants weren’t here every day anymore.
David could leave me to go to work, but he rarely left me alone at night. I think he knew about the nightmares. They plagued my sleep and sometimes, he’d bang around outside my bedroom until I called out to him to tell him to be quiet. I think that was his way of letting me know he was there if I needed him.
“Grant, you can’t keep hiding, mate. This isn’t living, it’s…” he paused on the other side of my door. “This is just existence. You don’t deserve this. Come back out here and let’s talk. Please?”
I stared at the spot where I imagined his head was. I could picture his face, covered in my blood as the impact from the bullet spun me around. It came back to me in slow motion. I could still see Toni curled up on that crappy chair, tears streaming down her face in her sleep. The way she’d clung to me that night in the hospital.
If I thought about it hard, I remembered the way she’d felt when I slid into her, the way she’d shivered beneath me, but the one that plagued me, the one that skittered around in my brain, was the memory of her tears.
“You know she loves you, right? That she loves us both.”
I sighed again, the weight of the world pressing me down onto my bed.
How did I make this go away? How could I be the man I used to be?
“Do you remember that night, Grant? The way she was so eager for you? The way she moved on your mouth? The way she tastes? Because I remember it, I remember it well.”
I knew he’d gone to her several times since I’d come home but he didn’t brag about it. I think he felt bad, but I wasn’t sure why. I wasn’t jealous, I was glad they had each other more than anything.
His words played in my head. The way she tasted, the way her thighs had clamped down around my head. Her fingers tangled in my hair, holding my head in just the right spot as she writhed on my tongue. I was hard in an instant.
I had to shift on the bed, the memories were flooding me now and I was too hard not to notice. Fuck, the way she’d moved on David, how she’d looked back at me, reaching for me even as she took all he had to give her.
My breath caught in my chest. I remembered her eyes, the shine of them in the light of the candles, the look of adoration on her face. Oh God, and the way her lips had wrapped around my stiff cock. I touched myself, meaning only to adjust the ridge in my pajama bottoms, but my hand lingered.
I hadn’t been hard since I’d come home. I’d started to think maybe I never would be again. I tried again, and the image of Toni above me came to me, moving on me the way she’d moved on David, taking me into her body eagerly, loving every moment of it.
“Shit!” I whispered, the heat of the memory scorching my skin, even now.
She’d made me forget the world, she’d made me come harder than I’d ever come in my life. Now, the memory wasn’t enough.
“Do you think...” I paused, my voice almost rusty after so little use. “Do you think she still wants me?”
“I know for a fact she does, mate. She’s dying inside without you, without us.” The weight was put on the last word, and I knew he meant it.
“I, uh, I need a minute.” I couldn’t get my erection to go down to save my life. Memories of Toni were swarming through my brain, her kiss, her laugh, the way her eyes lit up when she smiled.
“I think you need more than a minute, mate, you’ve got a forest on your face. Need some help?” I heard his laughter and smiled. I was forgiven already.
“No, I think I can manage.” I left the room then, my body back to normal, and went to the bathroom.
I had almost lost it all. Hopefully, I hadn’t realized it too late.
Toni
I stared at the stack of boxes I was preparing to use. Christmas vacation was coming up for the boys and I’d told them we’d move during the vacation. They weren’t happy about it, but they didn’t complain too much.
I had to escape the memories, and I thought they did too. Mark was doing alright, but both had learned that kids can be super judgmental. For that matter, so can other kids’ parents. They weren’t exactly pariahs, but they weren’t on many birthday party invitation lists either.
David had tried to spread the word that both had completed their programs and were back on the straight and narrow, but people are hard when it comes to drugs.
My story on the shooting and Grant’s near death had gone viral. People were outraged that someone had just so blithely ordered the death of a cop. A paper out in Newport News saw it and I’d had the offer on my phone before I could even blink. I’d planned to turn them down, but as time went on I had started to realize that Grant wasn’t going to come back to me. No matter how much I wanted him to.
I loved them both, I just couldn’t face life with one alone. Not after knowing the heaven, the pure bliss, of having them both love me. Grant refusing to see me had spoiled it all, had put a cloud over every single moment David and I spent alone. I loved those moments, I cherished them, but I also knew it should be both of them with me, not just one.
I stood up, giving the boxes a finger before I went in to take a shower. The boys were out, both working at the pizza place they’d applied to together. I was alone and miserable. Bee had offered to come over, but it was her show night and I didn’t want to interrupt. She loved that television program and somebody was going to die on tonight’s episode. I couldn’t take that from her.
When I got out twenty minutes later I was clean but the tears were still threatening to ruin my face all over again.
A pounding on the door startled me and I went to peep through the hole to see who was knocking like that. When I saw who it was, I smiled. Cop knocking.
“Hi, David. I...”
Grant stood behind him, his smile hopeful, his face free of the beard he’d started to grow in the hospital.
16
Toni
“If you could put that box over there, and oh
, Mark, take that rug and put it in the closet, please.” I watched the boys bringing in boxes as Bee and Barbara stacked glasses on the counter. It was almost done.
Spring sunshine danced in the windows, making everything glitter and shine. Even the late snowstorm had blown away. Now the world was ready to awaken once more, reborn anew.
“Sis, here’s the bag with your clothes in it.” Eric brought me a clear bag.
Inside was an ivory dress made of lace and silk.
My wedding gown.
I couldn’t stop the constant smile on my face as I went through the day. I didn’t stop when the hairdresser stabbed one too many hairpins into my head, I didn’t stop when Bee zipped me up and caught a bit of my skin in the zipper. I didn’t stop when we found out I’d packed the wrong shoes and that the ones I had rather stupidly put in the bag were a bright shade of pink. I just kept smiling.
Because, today, I was marrying one of my best friends. I smiled and kept going, because he really knew me. He knew that I have nightmares about bunnies and have a fear of them, that my favorite food is beet soup. Weird, but I love it. He knew everything about me and he still loved me. Just as much as I loved him.
When my heel broke on the way into the old courthouse still used for weddings and functions now that we had a new courthouse in town, I kept smiling and kicked both shoes off. The doors opened and I stepped into the old chamber that had once bore witness to trials. This was a police wedding and I had my procession of officers, and my uniformed man at the end of it, dressed in his finest blues.
My smile only grew wider when I saw him, his best man at his side. I took them both in, but my eyes went back to him. The man that would soon be my husband.
I went to him, Eric acting as my father to give me away, and stood with Bee and Barbara at my side.
The justice of the peace said his words, went through his spiel, and soon, he was pronouncing vows. The world stood still when I took his hands.
“Grant, do you take Toni to be your lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others...”
The words disappeared as I looked into his eyes. There was only him.
“I do.”
The world was only his lips.
There were more words, somebody poked me. “I do.”
And then I was in his arms, a rapidly warming gold band on my finger. Lights flashed, and people laughed. I was kissed and congratulated, I was taken into another pair of arms.
“My turn next.” I looked into a pair of blue eyes. David’s eyes.
“Yes, your turn next, darling.” He kissed my cheek and held me tight.
Only a few people knew our secret. Only a few would attend our wedding when we held it on an island far away in a couple of months’ time.
For now, I was legally married to Grant. Soon, I would be spiritually married to both.
“Thank you, my love.”
“For what?” He stood back, his love shining through fierce and warm.
“For giving me the world. For giving me everything. You’ve both done that, you know?”
“You’ve given us the same in return, Toni. In spades.” I had another kiss on the cheek before he whispered to me once more. “The honeymoon is ours though. All of ours.”
I grinned as I let him go and danced over to Grant.
He pulled me up into his arms and carried me out of the old courthouse. We made our way to a car.
We had to catch a flight so no reception for us, we’d do that in the summer. There’d be a cake, a party, all of that, after David and I were married. We’d celebrate it all, even if one marriage were to be kept secret.
Maybe one day I’d be able to marry both men legally, at the same time, but for now, it would work like this. Mainly because we all made sure it worked.
David was in the back seat, his voice coming quietly to my ears.
“Yeah, we’re almost there. We’ll be at the cabin in two hours. The car will be there? Good. Thanks, mate.” David hung up the phone and we had his full attention.
“Just get us to the airport, mate, the rest has been arranged.”
Two hours later, as promised, we were pulling up to a cabin deep in the heart of the woods of eastern Kentucky. The cabin was owned by one of David’s old friends and he’d offered it for our use. I’d expected a monstrosity of glass and dark wood but it was more suited to my liking. A modest, one-story cabin, with a large window looking out at the view of the surrounding hills, a chimney that was already smoking, and a charm that oozed from the wood.
“I love it!” I cried out as I stepped out of the car.
“I’m so glad you do, Toni. I’m going to head back to town, get a few supplies, let you two have some alone time. You deserve it.” His eyes were smiling as he took the key from Grant and left us alone.
“Shall I take you in, dear wife?” His laughing gray eyes were clear and happy. He’d recovered quickly after they came to my house that day. The day he woke back up to the world.
Neither of my men had ever experienced real, intimate love before, the kind sexual partners could share, but often didn’t get to have. We had it though, all of us, and we didn’t want our lives any other way.
We walked up to the door and Grant, healed and as strong as ever, picked me up in arms made of steel. I put my hand on the hard muscles of his chest and kissed him as he pushed the door open.
“Thank you, husband dear,” I said, giggling.
“My pleasure, wife of mine. Now, where’s the bedroom?”
It wasn’t long before we found ourselves naked in an old cast iron bed, covered in a handmade quilt as we kissed our way down each other’s bodies. We were a tangled mass as we explored each other, found the places that built desire and stroked them.
I was just on the verge of begging him to fill me when the front door opened and David came in.
“David?” I called out and he came into the room. Grant slid down between my thighs beneath the covers, his tongue making me gasp as it rasped up my thigh.
“Still aren’t done, huh? May I join you?”
“Of course!” I meant to say it in a normal tone but Grant’s lips closed around my clit and the world tilted.
David was soon naked beside me.
“This is how it should be,” Grant said as he came up for air and to kiss me. “I didn’t really like the idea of doing this alone. It’s not what we’re about at all.”
It wasn’t, and I was glad David was back in time. He came up behind me and I slid down, nestled between his thighs, my head on his chest, as Grant shifted between my thighs. Now we were one. Now we were ready.
“You were beautiful today, Toni. I couldn’t wait to see you out of that dress though. My dick was hard for you so many times today,” David said. I felt the ridge of his hardness against the small of my back. “I wanted to cup your breasts and bury my face between your thighs with all that lace pushed up around your hips.”
The naughty images flooded my mind and I felt the heat Grant had started to build explode into an inferno. David’s fingers found my nipples, plucked them, just as Grant started to slide home, deep into my honeyed walls. I pushed back into David and thrust my hips up to take Grant whole.
“Most of all, I wanted to watch this, the first time Grant fucked his brand new wife.”
Grant’s fingers found my clit just as David spoke and I was exploding once more, my body writhing between them.
“Toni.” Grant gasped as my walls fluttered around him, milking his hard cock as he fucked me hard and fast, so deep and good.
I reached for him, my finger finding his bottom lip. He sucked my finger into his mouth and I was coming harder than ever, David’s fingers on my nipples only adding to the maelstrom of pleasure coursing through me.
“Don’t stop, Grant, make her come again and again,” David urged him on, and I was caught between them. The only place I ever wanted to be.
Grant pressed my clit again, harder so that I couldn’t dislodge his finger as i
t became too much.
“I’m going to suck these beautiful tits of yours now, Toni, until you come again. So be a good girl, and do it for me.” I could only whimper in anticipation as David moved.
He knelt beside me, his cock just within reach.
I wrapped my fingers around him, and he knew I wanted to suck him, wanted him to come down my throat, but he wouldn’t have it. It was my wedding day, I was meant to be the one coming.
I purred beneath him, it was all I could do when he pressed my breasts together and sucked both nipples at once.
Grant continued to drive into me, his cock stroking just the right place, and I was on the verge of breaking into a million pieces.
I rode it all out, screaming their names as they fucked me, sucked me, and touched me wherever they wanted to touch me. There were no limits between us, no boundaries. But neither of my men had come. That’s when I knew I was ready for the most intimate stage, the one we hadn’t broached yet.
I pushed at Grant and he pulled back to look at me.
“It’s time, please. I have to have you both.” I knew it might hurt, but right now, I didn’t care. I wanted to be theirs.
“If that’s what you want, Toni.” He looked at me more closely, before he pulled away. He turned swiftly, pulling me with him. He didn’t even dislodge himself he did it so smoothly.
“David,” Grant called out, but he was there, a bottle of lubricant in his hand.
I waited as he moved onto the bed, holding my breath. Warm fingers touched my most secret place, my back entrance, the one we’d never tried.
David’s fingers teased me often, as they did now, and it always excited me when he touched me there, but he’d never gone further than slipping a finger into me briefly.
“Relax, princess,” he said from behind me. “It will hurt if you don’t relax.”
His fingers were inside me then, two of them, opening me, stretching me wide. I sucked in a shocked breath, but Grant soothed me, his lips kissing my jaw as he held me close to his body.
Dirty Cops Next Door Page 14