by Amber Garza
Once Kyler drew the shirt away from my face it was soaked in dark red blood. There were few blood splatters on the floor near our feet, and the tips of our fingers were coated in it.
“It looks like a crime scene in here,” I observed. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be.” He gave me a funny look. “It’ll be inspiration for the scenes I’m writing today.”
“You’re writing about nosebleeds? Gross. Well, thanks for the warning. I will not be reading this book,” I teased, and Kyler smiled in response. Wrinkling my nose, I could feel the crusted blood drying on my face. “I better clean myself up.”
Kyler nodded, holding the bloodied shirt in his fist, as I slipped into the bathroom. My reflection surprised me. Not because of the dried blood. No, I expected that. What I didn’t expect was the slight flush of my cheeks, the shine in my eyes. Kyler was changing me.
After taking a shower and getting ready, I emerged from the bathroom. I glanced down at the floor in the hallway and saw that it had been cleaned. Kyler was in the kitchen making coffee, Edgar panting by his feet. All remnants of my earlier incident had vanished. I exhaled, and went to the kitchen. Without saying a word, Kyler pressed a mug of coffee into my palm.
We had seamlessly gotten into a routine of sorts. Every morning we had coffee, then I played with Edgar while Kyler wrote. In the afternoon I would clean up around the house, and then we’d start dinner. Kyler liked to cook, and I didn’t have any experience with it so he was teaching me. I hoped to be able to prepare a meal for him soon without any help. It was the least I could do.
While holding the coffee cup in one hand, I opened the fridge with the other. As I suspected, the shelves were pretty bare. I peered up at Kyler. “We’re almost out of food. I’ll need to make a trip to the grocery store.”
“Not necessarily.” He leaned against the counter, sipping his coffee.
I raised my brows, unsure of what he meant.
Pushing off the counter, he said, “Come with me.”
Curious, I scurried behind him as he headed outside. The sun was hidden behind the clouds, and the sky was grey and dreary. Shivering, I hugged myself. It would be spring soon, and I looked forward to nicer weather. We made our way around the side of the house, past my bedroom window and into the backyard. Right inside the gate was a little garden with all kinds of colorful vegetables.
“See, we have plenty of food right here.” Kyler’s face beamed with pride.
“Wow, you are almost totally self-sustaining.”
“Yep. At one point I thought of getting chickens. Then I could get my protein without ever having to leave my property. But when I get in the writing zone, I sometimes forget to feed Edgar even. How would I care for a bunch of chickens?”
“You would do almost anything not to have to leave your property, huh?”
He was quiet a moment before shrugging. “Like I said before, I enjoy it here.”
I nodded, all the while wondering what the real reason was. But Kyler had never pushed me about my past, so I would offer him the same respect.
“Well, these veggies are great, but we need more than just this,” I said. “If you make me a list I can go to the store this afternoon.”
Kyler studied me with a serious expression.
I squirmed under his intense gaze. “What?”
“I don’t want you to do anything that will make you uncomfortable. We can survive with the food we have for a little longer. And if not, I can always go. I don’t like to leave the property, but I do when I have to.”
I felt his words like a physical slap in the face. Anger simmered. “Why would going to the store make me uncomfortable? You think because I look like this I can’t go out in public? I’ll have you know that I’ve been like this for years, and I go places all the time. And yeah, people stare and whisper, but I don’t give a shit. I know I’m damaged and ugly, but I don’t care. I guess I thought you didn’t either.” Pushing past him, I bumped him hard with my shoulder. I was throwing a fit like a child, but I was too upset to stop myself. “Make me a grocery list, or I’ll just spend your money on a bunch of junk food.” With my head held high, I stalked away from him.
“I don’t think you’re damaged or ugly.” His words caused me to halt in my tracks.
My lips trembled, and I squeezed my eyes shut in an effort to block out the deceitful words. “Don’t lie to me.”
“I’m not lying.” He came to stand in front of me. “It’s fine. You can go to the store if that’s what you want. I was trying to protect you. I didn’t want you to go if you weren’t ready. Not because of your scars, but because of your bruises. I was allowing you time to heal. Allowing you time to hide out for as long as you needed.”
My insides fluttered. He was speaking from experience, I could tell. That’s what he was doing – hiding out. I wanted to stay angry with him. Anger was easy for me. It protected my heart, it kept me safe. But I knew he was telling the truth. He’d never been trying to hurt me. He was trying to give me what he thought I needed. No one had ever done that for me before. This time I almost cried out in pain when I felt the crack. Kyler had broken down another wall. One I’d spent years building. I couldn’t keep letting this happen. I needed to be more on guard around him.
“Thanks, but I don’t mind going to the store. Leave me a list and I’ll go after I tire Edgar out.” Without waiting for his response, I hurried back inside.
Kyler let me take his truck into town. It was an old Dodge, and it sputtered and bumped along the uneven road. I could see why he didn’t like going anywhere. This car was a piece of junk. I still marveled at how freely he trusted me. For all he knew I could take off in his truck and never return. The guy was a mystery to me. Then again, I was used to paranoid druggies. Maybe there were more guys out there like Kyler, and I’d just never met them. Perhaps my view of people was skewed because of the life I’d lived and the company I had chosen to keep.
Kyler had scrawled a little map on a torn piece of paper for me. I glanced down at it and turned the corner at the nearest stop sign. Kyler’s closest neighbor was miles from him, and the next one was even further out. Mostly I passed open fields or pastures filled with cows. Finally I turned another corner and a grocery store came into view. Surrounding it was a gas station and a strip mall. There weren’t many cars in the parking lot. Nothing like what you would see in the city.
The vehicle rumbled into the parking lot, my body bouncing on the seat as I drove. My long hair whipped around my face as the breeze whirled around me from the open window. I would’ve closed it, but it seemed to be stuck halfway down. It wouldn’t budge no matter how much effort I put into it. I parked near the front of the store, cut the engine, and snatched the grocery list off the passenger seat. The money Kyler had given me was safely tucked into the pocket of my jeans.
I scanned over the list as I walked toward the store. Kyler had written a small list, but when I got to the last line my lips tugged at the corners.
And anything special you’d like for yourself.
The two glass doors automatically opened, granting me entry. I stepped inside the store, and grabbed a cart. Soft jazz music played in the background. Only a few shoppers made their way around the store, but mostly it was empty. My shoulders relaxed a little. I didn’t know why Kyler had been so worried. Shopping here would be a piece of cake compared to in the city. There all the stores were crowded with people. Here I would be able to stay under the radar. I pushed the cart down the bread aisle, searching for the brand Kyler had listed.
A woman wearing an apron bearing the name of the store was stocking the shelves. She turned to me, blinking behind her thick glasses. Her hair was piled high on her head and seemed to be glued there with an exorbitant amount of hairspray. When her gaze landed on me, her mouth popped open, her eyes betraying the horror she felt at my appearance. My insides twisted. Not that I wasn’t used to this reaction, but it still stung every time it happened. You’d think I would have been desensit
ized to it, but I doubted that I’d ever be okay with people looking at me like I was some kind of freak.
Another woman turned down the aisle, pushing a small toddler in the front of her cart. The basket was filled with sugary cereals and fruit snacks. When her head bobbed up, she didn’t even try to hide her grimace. My cheeks flamed, and I lowered my head, staring at the ground. At least in the city people usually tried to pretend they didn’t notice my scars.
“Excuse me, miss, but I’ve never seen you around here before,” the grocery store employee said in an unkind tone.
No shit, Sherlock. Ignoring her, I pulled the bread from the shelf and tossed it in the cart.
“Are you new in town?” She pressed.
The other woman passed by quickly, moving out of my way and practically pressing herself against the other side of the aisle as if she thought what I had was contagious. When I heard snickering, I turned around to see two young boys hiding behind a display board, pointing and laughing in my direction.
My skin crawled. Trying to stay calm, I stared at the list quivering between my fingers. I couldn’t read anything on it though. All I could see was the horrified expressions of the people around me. They were burned into my brain.
Freak. Scarred. Ugly.
Heath’s words reeled through my mind. I bit down hard on my lip, attempting to bring myself back to the present.
“Miss?” the woman was still trying to get my attention. “I asked if you were new in town.”
I heard you, idiot. But I was choosing not to answer your moronic questions. Taking a deep breath, I lifted my head, aware that responding would probably be the smart thing to do. If I kept standing here freaking out, she’d think something was wrong with me. “Yes.” Hoping that simple answer would appease the nosy lady, I rolled the cart past her.
No such luck.
“Who are you staying with? I know everyone around here.” Her tone was accusatory. I saw a cashier watching me with suspicion.
I swallowed hard. Kyler was right. I wasn’t ready for this.
“She’s with me,” Kyler’s voice boomed from over my shoulder. When his arm came around me, I sagged against him in relief. We’d never touched before. And usually I shied away from physical contact. But not this time. This time I needed his comfort, his strength. With his arm around me I felt protected, safe. Pressing my face into his chest, I gripped the fabric of his shirt in my hand.
“Oh, okay,” the woman answered sourly before turning away from us. Now that she couldn’t harass me, she didn’t seem as interested.
“You didn’t have to come. I said I could handle it myself,” I whispered into his chest.
“I know you can, but you shouldn’t have to. I’m sorry.” Kyler drew me even closer, tightening his grip.
I took big breaths in an attempt to slow down my racing heart. “How did you even get here? I have your car.”
“I jogged.”
Glancing down at his feet, I suppressed a laugh. “In your loafers?”
“Hey, desperate times…” he let the phrase linger, not bothering to finish it. It was okay, I knew what he meant.
“Thanks,” I breathed. “I know how much you hate leaving your house.” Some assistant.
“I wouldn’t have come if I didn’t want to,” he answered firmly. His hand stroked my back, and I peered up at him through my dark fringe. The way he looked down at me so tenderly made my heart flip in my chest.
After a moment, he cleared his throat. “Now, where’s that list? I’ll help you get everything so we can get outta here as quickly as possible.”
Releasing my grasp on him, I took a step backward and handed him the list. Kyler pushed the cart forward and started throwing things into it. I stayed close by his side, keeping my gaze locked on him. People might have continued their staring and whispering, but I didn’t notice. All I noticed was the way Kyler smiled at me, the way his eyes never judged or mocked. The way he looked at me like I was a normal girl, not different in any way. It made me wonder how he was able to see me like no one else ever had before.
I heaved a sigh of relief when we finally emerged from the store. “Man, you weren’t kidding about this town,” I admitted to Kyler as we loaded up the truck with grocery bags.
“I would say I-told-you-so, but I’m not the gloating type.”
“Sure you’re not.” I smirked, tossing a bag in the back.
His eyes grew serious. “I really am sorry about the way they treated you in there.”
Emotion rose in me, but I shrugged it down. “It’s no biggie. Happens all the time.”
“It is a biggie,” he said. “It shouldn’t happen. Ever.”
The force of his words caused my body to tense. I’d never seen him like this before. Not knowing what to say, I stared at him blankly.
After he’d put the last bag in the truck, he turned to me with a grin. “There’s a clothing store down the road. What do you say we go there and get you some new clothes?”
A breeze blew over my skin, causing goosebumps to rise on my flesh. Kyler had already done so much for me, I didn’t need him to buy me a new wardrobe too. I flashed him a teasing look. “I’m sorry if you were hoping to play out some Pretty Woman fantasy today, but I’m not interested.”
“Pretty Woman fantasy? What’s that?” He appeared thoroughly confused.
“Oh, come on, you expect me to believe you’ve never seen the movie Pretty Woman? It’s a classic. Julia Roberts, Richard Gere. Surely you’ve seen it.”
“Ah, yes. I have.” He snapped his fingers. “You got me. You figured out my big secret prostitute fantasy. I just never figured I’d find one sleeping in my barn.”
My mouth dropped open, flabbergasted. “I’m not a prostitute.”
“You’re not?” He placed his hands on his hips in shock. “Well, then how can I play out my fantasy?”
“You’re joking with me, right?”
“Yes, I’m joking with you, Jade. I have no prostitute fantasy, and I haven’t for one moment thought you were one.” The smile disappeared from his face. “I hope one day you’ll learn to trust me. But since that’s not today, here you are.” He pulled a wad of money out of his pocket and held it out to me.
“What’s this?”
“It’s the money you earned for assisting me this week. You can use it to buy some new clothes.”
I closed my fingers around the cash. “What if I don’t want to use it on clothes?”
“Then you don’t have to.” Kyler rested his back on the truck. The wind kicked up a few strands of his hair and it danced over his face. “But you can’t keep wearing the same two outfits every day. You may find this surprising, but most woman have a different outfit for each day of the week.”
“Rich bitches,” I said with a tiny smile.
“Snobs,” Kyler joked.
I let out a light giggle.
His face lit up. “I’ve never seen you laugh before. You should do it more often. It becomes you.”
Another crack blasted through my chest. He needed to stop saying things like that. Glancing down at my NY shirt, I realized that he was right. I couldn’t keep wearing the same thing all the time. Besides, my other shirt was blood stained now. I could only do so much laundry. “Okay, you win. Let’s go to the clothing store.”
SEVEN
The bell on the door dinged as Kyler and I entered the Red Blossom Boutique. The shop was nothing like the thrift stores I usually frequented. Mannequins displayed fancy dresses in the window, and the whole place smelled like floral perfume. The clothes were new, all organized neatly in circular racks. A woman who appeared to be in her mid-twenties stood behind the counter folding clothes. She wore a skirt and jacket, her hair pulled back in a bun at the nape of her neck, revealing sparkly chandelier earrings.
I so did not belong here. “Let’s go. This was a bad idea.”
“Kyler?” The woman’s head bobbed up. She dropped the sweater she’d been folding and came around the counter.
“Sure.” Polly gave me a warm smile, which surprised me based on how I’d been treated at the grocery store. I assumed this whole town was filled with demon spawn.
“Polly’s grandmother and my grandma were best friends,” Kyler explained.
I nodded with understanding as Polly guided me forward. When she started picking clothes off the rack with dizzying speed, I realized I was in retail hell. No way was I trying on all those outfits. Some of the shirts were pink. Pink! I hadn’t worn pink since I was…well…ever. As she continued draping clothes over her arm, I spotted a red table in the corner with lacy panties and bras piled on top. I walked over to it, fingering the silky material. I’d never had anything this nice. Discreetly, I peeked at one of the price tags. Not nearly as expensive as I had assumed. And I did need some. I only had a few pairs of old underwear, and one worn out bra. Searching through them, I found my size and picked up a couple. Tucking them under my arm, I made my way over to Polly. After several more minutes of collecting items, Polly pushed me into a small dressing room, hanging her findings on a hook. Then she stepped out, closing the curtain behind her.
“Let me know if you need anything in a different size or color,” she called out before walking away.
“Okay,” I mumbled, staring at myself in the full length mirror. I was pretty sure it wasn’t meant to look like a funhouse mirror, but that’s exactly what it reminded me of. The bruises on my face and neck were now turning an ugly yellow shade resembling the color of puke. Even though the swelling had gone down, it didn’t make my face look any more proportionate. Then again, I guess it wasn’t anymore. Once upon a time it was. I think that was maybe the hardest part for me. I’d met other people with deformities, abnormalities they were born with. But mine wasn’t like that. I had been completely normal until someone had done this to me. It wasn’t some random act of God, or fate, or whatever you believed in. No, this was intentionally inflicted on me. Someone had made a choice that forever altered my life. And that was the part I’d never been able to get past.