‘Imogen, you’re scaring me.’
‘I’m sorry. I’m fine. I was just thinking...I was thinking that this thing...’
She fluttered her hands between them and he smiled. ‘It only gets better. Stronger.’
Was he feeling it too? Was it possible he had fallen for her as well? ‘Yes,’ she whispered, her heart lodged somewhere near her throat and constricted her breathing. ‘I...’
‘Yes,’ he agreed and pushed her hair back from her face. ‘Every time we make love I want you more. I wouldn’t have said that was possible. It’s certainly never happened to me before.’
‘Possible...’ And then his meaning became clear and she felt quite ill. ‘Sex?’ He was talking about sex...
‘Not just sex.’ His eyebrow rose in a sexy slant. ‘Hot sex.’ He kissed her. ‘Great sex.’ Another kiss. ‘Phenomenal sex.’ His smile was sinful and Imogen buried her face against his neck.
God, she had nearly made an utter fool of herself by blurting out what was in her heart and he was talking about sex!
‘I’ve made you blush.’
She forced herself to laugh softly because what else could she do?
‘You feel the same.’ There was a deep satisfaction in his voice and Imogen pushed her feelings aside. She raised a small smile because she knew this wasn’t a love match and to his credit he had never pretended it was. And what would telling him how she felt achieve anyway? It would only make her feel awkward around him and probably him around her as well.
No, it was better if this was her secret to deal with alone.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
IMOGEN CAME AWAKE slowly and felt the sun on her face before she opened her eyes. She felt blissfully relaxed right up until she realised that she was alone in Nadir’s bedroom; the only sound she could hear was a hawk calling periodically outside her window.
Nadir had gone again. He’d woken early and left her. Still unused to having help with Nadeena, she sprinted out of bed and only paused long enough to pull on a robe behind the door on her way out. It was Nadir’s robe, of course, and it smelt of his special blend of male and spice. Trying to ignore the way his scent made her tingle all over, she padded quickly down the marble hallway and into the living room.
When that was empty she headed for the outdoor terrace.
Expecting that she would find the same scene as she had the last time, Imogen heard the sound of Nadeena’s infectious giggles. She waited for the sight of the devoted Maab playing peekaboo with Nadeena when her heart all but flew into her mouth as she discovered that it wasn’t Maab or Tasnim entertaining her daughter, but Nadir—in the pool. The sight of his bronzed torso stopped her in her tracks and she drooled at the way the sun glinted off his skin and turned it to burnished copper.
Pausing in the doorway and half hidden by a massive potted palm, Imogen watched Nadir throwing Nadeena up in the air and catching her just as her toes flittered across the top of the water, his biceps stretching and bulging in a fascinating display while Nadeena squealed with delight and clung to his neck.
She watched quietly for a moment, completely unnoticed as father and daughter frolicked in the sunshine. It seemed impossible that only a few days ago he had been a single-minded playboy who worked and played to excess and she could hardly fathom that he could be just as at home presiding over a boardroom full of world leaders as he was blowing raspberries on a baby’s stomach.
His handling of Nadeena as he turned her onto her stomach and floated her across the top of the water, speaking to her softly in his native tongue was gentle and tender. But then she’d always known he had the capacity for that because she’d experienced it herself fifteen months ago in Paris.
And after last night she knew he was a man who felt things deeply and she felt awful. Awful for the tragedy he had endured and for the fact that he believed he had created it and awful because she had kept Nadeena’s birth from him and had never planned to tell him. In her defence, she had believed that she was acting in the best interests of her daughter but watching the two of them together over the past few days had shown her that she had been wrong.
It seemed bizarre that a week ago she would have said that he was not father material and yet her own father had been held up as a wonderful family man in the community and she didn’t have one memory of him holding her and playing with her as Nadir was doing with their baby now.
A lump formed in her throat. Yes, Minh had played with Nadeena and there was no doubt he was a wonderful male figure whom she hoped would stay in their lives for ever but he wasn’t Nadeena’s flesh and blood and why would she want to substitute that when Nadir obviously cared for their baby so much already? Yes, he could change his mind one day; yes, he could walk away, but maybe he wouldn’t either.
‘Imogen! Habibi.’
Catching sight of her, Nadir moved towards the edge of the pool and Nadeena bounced in his arms with excitement as she smiled and stepped outside. ‘I’ve been teaching the kid to swim and she’s a natural.’
Imogen grinned as he called her the kid. ‘She’s five months old—you can’t possibly tell.’
‘I can tell. And I read that the earlier you get a child used to water the better they are and she loves it.’
She also loved him, by the look of glee on her chubby face, and it only drove her feeling of guilt deeper. ‘Does she need feeding?’
‘Maybe.’ His gaze swept over her and she realised how dishevelled she looked. ‘You come straight from bed, habibi?’
The way he said bed made her blush and she was constantly surprised by her visceral reaction to this man. All he had to do was look at her like he was now and she would happily let him do whatever he wanted as frequently as he wanted. Was it any wonder she had fallen for him again? She knew she’d been a fool to think that she could spend time with someone so utterly virile and not crave more.
‘Are you hungry?’ he said, climbing out of the pool with Nadeena lifted high against his shoulder. ‘There’s pastries and fresh fruit on the table and also a pot of tea, although it might need reheating.’
‘Thanks.’ About to take Nadeena from him, she was startled when he dropped a sweet lingering kiss on her lips. ‘Sabah el kheer. Good morning, beautiful,’ he said with a sexy grin.
Imogen swallowed the lump that hadn’t quite disappeared from her throat. ‘Good morning to you too.’
She settled into an outdoor chair and put Nadeena to her breast while Nadir sat beside them and fielded calls on his phone. He hadn’t bothered to put anything else on in the heat and she couldn’t take her eyes off his long lean form in black swimming trunks and nothing else.
When Nadeena had finished he made a joke about her burping technique and walked Nadeena around until her stomach had settled.
Knowing there was no easy way to say what needed to be said, Imogen decided to just bite the bullet. ‘Nadir, I’m sorry I didn’t try to contact you when she was born. It was wrong of me. I see that now.’
Nadir stilled as if he hadn’t been expecting her apology and why would he? It was only this morning she’d really understood how wrong she had been.
He looked at her. ‘I wasn’t exactly at my best at the time I found out you were pregnant.’ He rubbed his stubbled jaw and gave her a crooked grin. ‘And I don’t blame you at all for running when you did. Hell, I probably would have as well.’
Imogen hated that he still thought she had run from him but then she realised with a flash of insight that that was exactly what she had done.
She had run.
She had done what she had so often begged her mother to do when she’d found her crying over her father yet again.
‘That’s nice of you but in hindsight I should have hung around to have at least talked to you.’
‘But I wasn’t there, habibi, and I didn’t tell you when I�
��d be coming back.’
She sighed. ‘I know, but...’
He moved closer to her and slipped the arm not holding their daughter around her waist. ‘It’s I who owe you an apology, Imogen. I was the one who failed you in your time of need.’
‘No...’ She shook her head and he leaned in and kissed her. Nadeena clapped her hands and Imogen’s smile turned watery.
‘Yes.’ His voice was rough with emotion. ‘I should not have walked out on you. It was cowardly.’
‘You were in shock.’
‘So must you have been.’
Imogen bit her lip and studied him. ‘You don’t think I did it deliberately, do you? You don’t think I tried to trap you?’
He shook his head. ‘At first I thought all types of things like that. But I don’t any more. I know you would never do something like that.’
Imogen smiled, wondering how it was that she felt better when she’d wanted to make him feel that way.
‘What was her birth like?’
His gruff question surprised her and it took her mind back to what might just be the best and toughest day of her life. ‘It was hard,’ she admitted. ‘I was in labour for twenty-four hours and...well, you’ve probably heard women talk about pushing out a watermelon?’
Nadir nodded.
‘Try a beach ball.’ She laughed and picked up a bottle of water from the table and took a gulp. ‘A very large and very hard beach ball.’ Her eyes misted over. ‘And then it was over and she was on my chest and honestly I...’ Her throat clogged as she remembered that she had looked around the stark, empty hospital room and wished that Nadir was there. She could feel the heat of his gaze on her and her eyes caught his. ‘The midwife said that during the birth I called your name.’
In the process of laying Nadeena on a shaded rug, he stilled and looked at her. Imogen instantly felt self-conscious revealing so much and would have taken another quick gulp of water but Nadir was there and pulling her in against his chest. ‘I’m so sorry I let you down.’ He drew back and stared into her eyes. Rubbed his thumb gently over the drop of water that clung to her lower lip. ‘I’m so sorry you had to go through that alone.’
‘I wasn’t completely alone.’ She sniffed back a rush of tears. ‘Minh visited and took care of us afterwards.’
‘Great.’ The word came out on a snarl. ‘Remind me to thank him next time I see him.’
Wondering what was up with him, she frowned. ‘He’s com—’
Nadir placed a finger over her lips. ‘I don’t want to talk about him.’ His voice was low and fierce. ‘You won’t ever need him or any other man again, do you understand, Imogen?’ He was as intense as he had been when he’d told her he was taking her to Bakaan and wouldn’t accept any arguments and Imogen was riveted. ‘And if we have more children you will never have to go through that without me again. I promise.’
More children? She hadn’t given any thought to more children but they hadn’t used contraception the whole time they had been in Bakaan. Silly, but she hadn’t even thought of it. Her hand went to her belly and she tried to make sense of the jumbled emotions that assailed her. Happiness, disbelief, anxiety...
‘What is it, habibi? Don’t you want more children?’
Yes, oh, yes. She loved being a mother. ‘Yes. Do you?’
His smile was the sweetest thing Imogen had ever seen. ‘Many.’
A giddy thrill rushed through her. The only thing that would make this moment more special was if he said that he loved her.
She let out a shaky breath. Oh, what she would give to hear those sweet words come out of his mouth.
‘I never thought you wanted children,’ she said softly.
He gave a short laugh. ‘I didn’t. I guess things change. People change.’
Imogen thought about her father and wondered if he had changed. If he was nicer to his new family. Had it just been her and her mother he couldn’t love?
‘What is it, habibi?’
Imogen bit the inside of her lip. She smiled up at him and shook her head. ‘Nothing.’ Why ruin the moment by thinking about the past? Nadir cared about her, she could see that much in his eyes, and he wanted her. Physically, their relationship was as good as she could wish for. As good as she remembered. She rested her head against his shoulder and tried not to give in to the gremlins inside her head that said this bubble of happiness couldn’t last.
‘Come—I have organised a surprise.’
‘What is it?’
‘Sand-boarding.’
Having expected him to say something like spa, or oasis, or beach, Imogen was completely flummoxed when he named something she’d never heard of before and which sounded like something builders did to houses when they repaired them. ‘What is it?’
‘You’ll love it, habibi. Trust me. It’s just like waterskiing.’
* * *
‘I trusted you,’ she groaned as she stretched her over-worked hamstrings. ‘And sand-boarding is nothing like waterskiing.’
Nadir lounged in the doorway to her bedroom and grinned. ‘It isn’t?’
Imogen glared at him. Sand-boarding had been just part of the surprise he had organised. He’d also taken them to an oasis and taken delicious advantage of their time alone together every time Nadeena went down for a nap. They had existed in a blissful bubble and then she’d ruined it by trying to sand-board down a dune as big as a mountain. ‘You know it isn’t. It’s completely insane to throw yourself down a one hundred foot sand dune in the middle of the blazing sun.’
‘Ah, but that was your mistake, habibi—throwing yourself down. The trick is to actually stay on the board.’
Imogen rubbed her sore bottom she’d used to skate down when the steep incline had petrified her. ‘Thanks for the tip.’
‘But I was very impressed that you even tried it. I don’t know another woman who would.’
Imogen rolled her eyes because she’d slid most of the way down on her bottom. ‘Pride,’ she said ruefully. ‘They say it always comes before a fall and I fell so often my butt is still stinging.
Nadir straightened away from the door and came towards her. ‘I can kiss it better if you’d like?’ He leaned in and kissed her and Imogen wrapped her arms around his neck. Finally when he drew back he left his arms around her waist and she gazed up at him. ‘I’ve had a wonderful couple of days. Thank you.’
‘My pleasure. I hope you enjoyed the oasis. It’s one of my favourite spots.’
‘It was extraordinary and I don’t know why it isn’t already on everyone’s top ten tourist destinations. Really, Nadir, your ideas for turning it into an eco-resort are second to none.’
‘You are second to none, habibi. Now, please tell me you have changed your mind about us spending the night before our wedding alone.’
Imogen pulled back and made a face. ‘I haven’t. You know it’s a tradition for the bride and groom to spend the evening apart and I want to start our marriage off on the right foot.’ And usually the bride spent it with her friends but Caro and Minh hadn’t been able to fly in until tomorrow so it was just going to be her and Nadeena once Nadir left. ‘But what about Zachim? I know you’re really worried about him now and if you want to postpone the wedding we can.’
‘No.’ He shook his head. ‘The council have turned it into a big deal so it’s important that our wedding goes ahead. I’ll find Zach.’
‘And if you don’t?’
‘I will.’
He was always so confident. So sure.
‘Tell me, are you happy, habibi?’
Imogen hesitated. Would she jinx herself by saying yes? Because she was happy. Happier than she had been in a long time. Deciding that was a silly superstition anyway, she nodded. ‘Yes, I am.’
He kissed the tip of her nose and went to the cot to kis
s his daughter, who lay sprawled asleep on her back, and Imogen wrapped her arms around herself and wondered if she had a right to feel so contented.
‘Goodnight.’
Nadir gave her a searing kiss that nearly had her changing her mind about tradition but then he pulled away, briefly rested his forehead against hers and left.
Imogen closed the door behind him and leant against it, which was when she realised that she was still wearing his keffiyah.
Pulling it from her head, she clutched it to her chest as she remembered him winding it around her head to keep the sun from burning her. She sighed. Already she felt lonely without him and she told herself it was dangerous to want him so much. Dangerous to rely on him so much. But, try as she might, she couldn’t remove the grin from her face.
Her phone beeped a text message and she smiled when she saw it was from Minh, telling her they would be arriving tomorrow around noon. Since the wedding wasn’t until the afternoon, that would give them time to catch up beforehand.
When she had invited them she had been feeling as if her world was crashing down around her and she’d desperately needed their support.
It had only been a couple of days ago that she’d felt that way and yet so much had happened since then it felt like months. Now she was glad they were coming, not so much for the support and friendship they would offer but because they would be sharing in what was going to be one of the happiest days of her life.
Nerves fluttered in her stomach but she steadfastly refused to give into them and headed towards the shower.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
NADIR HAD NEVER been one to suffer from nerves and yet today, his wedding day, he was as jumpy as a stock trader facing his first day on the floor.
Maybe it had something to do with the overcast sky when normally it was true blue and cloudless this time of year. He gazed at the gathering cloud cover. The wind hadn’t picked up enough to trigger a sandstorm so that was something at least. Especially since the convoy Nadir had sent out to find Zach had located the four-wheel drive he had been using overturned and buried in the sand. He hadn’t told Imogen but he felt slightly sick at the thought that something sinister had happened to his brother. Fortunately no body had been recovered, which meant that he hadn’t been buried along with the vehicle.
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