“Does Derek know?”
Eli dropped his chin to his chest and she knew she had her answer. “Yes. He’s known since high school.”
“But he couldn’t tell me?”
“I made him promise not to.”
“All those times I asked him about you and he shrugged me off. He knew all along.”
“I wouldn’t have told him either except he saw it happen one time while he was here.”
Okay, fine. She could live with that. It hurt to know he felt he needed to hide something like this, but she could deal. On to the next round.
“Why did Caelan call his wife mate?”
Eli sighed and looked resigned. “Because they are mated.”
“And that means what, exactly?”
“It means they belong to each other. Forever.”
She chuckled. “You make it sound so permanent.”
Eli never took his very serious gaze off her. “It is.”
Oh. “But she’s not a wolf…thingy.”
“No. She’s one hundred percent human,” he agreed, ignoring the wolf-thingy barb.
“So, her dreams don’t have anything to do with being a…werewolf.”
“A shape-shifter, Nik, and no, her abilities have nothing to do with us. You’d have to talk to her grandmother about those, I believe they were passed down through her.”
“Why don’t you say werewolf?” Seemed a bit odd since they were, essentially, werewolves.
He shrugged. “The term werewolf had such a negative connotation in centuries past, that for the most part, we’ve adopted shape-shifter. It’s what we do, shift into a different shape, and besides, there are some groups of shifters that change into different animals.”
“Holy shit.” How did the world not know about this?
“We’re very good at keeping secrets, Nikki-Raine.”
“Okay, you’ve got to stop reading my mind, it’s freaking me out.” As if she didn’t have enough of the heebie-jeebies right now.
“I’m sorry, it’s just, we have this connection between us now and your face makes it so easy to guess what you’re thinking.”
He leaned in and kissed her cheek. He smelled so good. Her clit tingled with the contact of his lips, and she squeezed her thighs together.
Wait a minute. “Connection? What the hell are you talking about?”
Eli moved closer until his chest brushed her upper arm. His right arm stretched out along the chair back and his left arm lay along the side of the table.
“We’re mates, Nikki.” His lips nibbled a path on her chin, and his breath tickled her skin.
She shivered at both the sensations on her face and his words. Mates. Her eyes slid closed and she tilted her head to give him better access with his teeth.
Nikki jerked upright, her eyes flying open. “You bit me,” she accused.
He nodded. “Yes.”
“Why?” She’d thought it was all part of the sex. Clearly she’d been wrong.
“It’s part of the way a shifter forms their bond. By filling you with my come”—he laid his palm on her belly and she silently cursed when her pussy jumped to attention—“and marking you with my teeth and saliva, it tells other shifters that you belong to me.”
He showed absolutely no remorse for biting her. A warm fuzzy feeling coursed through her. It felt good, right, to be claimed by him. Did this mean…
“Am I pregnant?” she blurted out, then winced when she realized how dumb she sounded.
Eli growled and stuck his nose into the crook of her neck and shoulder.
“No.” He bit her ear gently.
“Now how would you know that?” And furthermore, you ditz, why did you ask him as if he would know? God what a loser she must look like.
“I can smell a conception. I can smell when you’re in heat. Soon, because we’re mated, your body will come to crave mine.”
Too late, it already does.
He backed away to look into her eyes. His were almost glowing a gold-brown. “Mine, Nikki-Raine. No one else’s. No one in my pack would ever dare lay a hand on you now, but human men won’t know the difference. I can become very possessive, Nik. I think you’ll find that out very shortly.”
“You mean like how you snapped at Caelan a few minutes ago?”
“Yes,” he gritted out.
“He’s your brother, for God’s sake. And his wife is pregnant.”
“Doesn’t matter. I won’t like any man getting close to you.”
Nikki took a minute to absorb Eli’s words. Why the hell wasn’t it bothering her to hear all this? Why wasn’t she running out the door? Her heart thumped hard. The same heart she’d given to him long ago.
So what should she do? Accept what he was telling her, as unbelievable as it sounded, or think on it? Nikki trusted him implicitly. He’d proven his love for her over and over the last… How many hours had it been? Despite her scars. She also couldn’t stand the thought of living without him. There was no question as to whether she’d stay, but maybe some time to process was in order.
Nikki stood abruptly, knocking her chair back and surprising Eli, whose eyes widened with her departure. She wouldn’t go far. Couldn’t go far. Her body wouldn’t let her, but she did have to go.
Eli stood too and she noticed the slight tremble in his legs and the fear in his eyes. She started to reach for him, but pulled back at the last second.
“I need to be alone. For a little while,” she said, feeling beyond stupid.
The wounded look on his face nearly ripped her heart apart. She didn’t need to be alone. Didn’t want to be alone. Why was she doing this? She needed explanations, not quiet time to reflect.
She shook her head. By this time tomorrow, she’d be certifiable. Too many thoughts jumbled in her brain.
“I know, sweetheart,” he soothed, surprising her. He was giving her space. He didn’t look happy about doing it, but would just the same. It was one of the reasons she loved him.
“I’ll be here if you need me.” Eli placed a gentle kiss on the tip of her nose. He turned and left her standing there staring at his back.
Need him? She needed him like a fish needed water. There was no question about that. She’d needed him since before the news of his ability to do an entirely unimaginable thing.
Chapter Ten
“Ah, there you are.”
Nikki twisted in the overstuffed glider rocker she’d sequestered herself in. Tieran stood in the doorway. When she moved further into the room another woman followed.
“Any reason you chose this room to hide in?” Tieran raised an eyebrow.
Nikki smiled and relaxed. “Nope. Just found it when I was wandering and couldn’t resist this chair.”
“It’s my favorite.”
“The room is beautiful. Did you do it?” Nikki kept her eyes on Tieran as the other woman sidled up next to her.
“Pfft. Are you kidding? You think Caelan would let me near a paintbrush? The fumes are noxious, don’t you know?” she said, rubbing a hand over her distended belly. “And a ladder? Won’t even go there. I did do the directing though. Oh, and thank you.”
“Aye, aye, aye.” The older woman stepped forward. “My sons are big, overbearing babies themselves. Not letting a woman decorate her own nursery. What is wrong with them? My dear Nicole, I am Judith. How are you?”
Nikki felt her face redden.
“Crap, I’m sorry, Judith. I meant to introduce you,” Tieran muttered.
Before she knew it, Judith had pulled Nikki from the depths of the plush chair and enveloped her in a bear hug. “Good grief, to hear Eli tell about it, you’d think half your face was missing.”
The blood that had pinked her cheeks a second ago, drained suddenly. Eli had said her scar didn’t bother him. Now she knew the truth.
The older woman sighed and patted Nikki’s back as if she were a long lost friend. “Oh for pity’s sake, don’t look like that. This piddly ole scar”—she traced a slim finger down the scar’s leng
th, making Nikki flinch—“doesn’t bother my son a bit. I just meant he’d said you were cut up in the crash and that I shouldn’t make a big deal of it when I saw you. I was picturing your eyeball hanging down and your ear out of place.”
Nikki let out the breath she held and a tiny smile tugged at her mouth as she envisioned what Judith described. She liked his mother immediately.
“It’s so nice to be able to hug at least one daughter-in-law. Don’t get to with this one,” she said, jerking a thumb in Tieran’s direction.
Don’t get to? Because she was pregnant? Was Tieran the kind of person who didn’t like anyone touching her belly? Nikki hadn’t gotten that vibe from her at all. Or maybe it had something to do with Tieran’s psychic abilities.
Suddenly it occurred to her what Eli’s mother had also said.
“Oh, Eli and I aren’t married.”
Judith smiled. “Yes you are.”
Tieran snorted. “Might as well be.”
“It’s all right, Nicole, I know everything. Besides, I can smell him all over you.”
Nikki’s stomach dropped and she barely refrained from sniffing her shirt. Mortified, she wondered exactly what Judith could smell.
“Relax, it’s a wolf thing,” Judith teased.
“Yeah. You know, Judith, I don’t care what any of you say, it’s still a little weird what you guys can smell,” Tieran added.
Jesus. What had Eli said earlier? That he could smell a conception or her in heat?
Judith turned to Tieran, her face incredulous. “More weird than what you do?”
Nikki choked back a laugh.
“You got me there.” Tieran sighed and plopped into the chair Nikki had just vacated. “My back is killing me.”
Judith’s eyes popped open. “You don’t think it’s labor, do you? Don’t underestimate back labor. I almost did with the boys. Got to the hospital in the nick of time.”
Talking about babies put more questions into Nikki’s head than she wanted to deal with, but Tieran had said to ask her anything.
“So are you going to have a…um…” God, how did she put this?
“A pup?” both Judith and Tieran said together.
“Yes,” Nikki said, deflating.
Tieran shivered. “God I hope not.”
Judith swatted her knee. “I already told you no, silly girl.”
“I know, but I keep envisioning this hairy little furball coming out of me.”
Nikki couldn’t help it. She laughed. Judith joined in, then Tieran. The three of them laughed until tears ran down their cheeks.
“Oh,” Judith finally spoke when they’d all settled down. “Ladies, I think we should move this conversation into the kitchen where I can get a drink.”
“I asked you if you wanted a drink when you got here, Judith.”
Eli’s mom winked at Nikki and headed for the door, throwing over her shoulder, “Not that kind of drink, dear.”
Nikki snickered again.
“Oh well,” Tieran said, struggling out of the chair. Nikki helped her to her feet. “I could use a Mountain Dew.”
“Isn’t soda bad for the baby?”
Tieran’s lip curled and Nikki sucked in a breath at the fierce look on her face.
Judith returned to Nikki’s side. “One thing you’ll learn about Tieran, dear, is that you should never mess with the girl’s Mountain Dew. I was here the night Caelan tried to talk her out of it until the baby was born.” She sighed dramatically. “I’m not sure my son’s ego will ever recover.”
“Damn skippy,” Tieran hissed. “Just because I’m carrying his furball, doesn’t give him permission to run my life.”
A few minutes later they were ensconced in the kitchen. Tieran contented herself with a Mountain Dew, Judith sipped a glass of red wine and Nikki drank a hard lemonade she’d found hiding amongst the condiment bottles in the refrigerator door.
“So here’s what happens, since I’m almost positive Eli didn’t tell you the specifics. Trust me, I had to go to Judith to get the details.” Tieran shifted in her seat, looking for a more comfortable position. “A pack has a hierarchy. The top is called the Prime. He’s kind of like the go-to guy for major problems, keeps the pack in order, blah, blah, blah.”
Judith laughed. “Actually, there’s quite a bit more involved.”
Tieran waved her off. “Nikki doesn’t need to know all that right now. So at one time, Caelan and Eli’s dad, Judith’s mate, was Prime.”
“That’s right,” Judith proclaimed proudly. “My Liam made a mighty fine Prime.”
Tieran rolled her eyes. “You’ll have to excuse Judith, she’s a little infatuated with Liam. You’ll see. Anyway. Liam retired and now Caelan is Prime.”
Nikki’s eyebrows shot upward. “Caelan is king?”
Mountain Dew shot from Tieran’s lips. “Lord, don’t say that when he’s around. His head’s big enough as it is.”
“Okay.” Nikki chuckled. “But, if Caelan and Eli are identical twins, how did Caelan get to be k—head honcho? Did they fight for it?” She vaguely remembered watching some special where the wolves fought for supremacy.
“Nope,” Judith answered. “Luck of the draw.”
“Huh?”
“Caelan was born first.”
“You’re kidding. A couple of minutes is all that’s keeping Eli from being Prime?”
“Yep. Not that Eli wants to be Prime anyway. And now”—she patted her belly—“with this little guy on the way, poor Eli’s shut out.”
Judith snorted indelicately. “Yeah. Poor Eli. He’s probably jumping for joy. Don’t get me wrong, Nikki, Eli loves his job as Second, and would take over the pack in a heartbeat if need be, but he’d rather be working his security jobs. Now with you here, he’ll probably even back off of some of those. That’s just how shifters are when they meet their mate.”
“Hmm.” Nikki bit her lip. She wasn’t too sure about this whole mate thing yet. And having Eli around more seemed way too stifling for her peace of mind. A change of subject was definitely in order. “So, if you’re not having a…pup, then when can they…you know, become a wolf?”
“Not ’til puberty, so I’m told,” Tieran said before taking another big gulp of her soda.
Judith nodded. “Right. And there’s plenty of time for you to learn all this.”
Nikki was doubtful. It must have shown on her face because Tieran took pity on her.
“I was in the same boat you’re in not too many months ago. It gets easier, I promise.”
“I’ll always be here to help too, dear.” Judith was nothing like Nikki ever imagined a mother-in-law to be.
Mother-in-law? No. Yes? Damn. She bit her lower lip. They had her so flustered she was starting to think the same way. Worse, she wanted it. Wanted a life with Eli in it. Had since high school probably, but those dreams had been shattered until the last few days.
What exactly was she running from? The love of her life, who with every moment of the day was proving how much he loved her back? Why?
She realized in a shocking discovery that the one thing she’d dwelled on for eight long, agonizing months didn’t matter in this house. She hadn’t even thought about her scarred face until Judith had touched it with a tender finger. No one had given her the pitying looks, or murmured behind her back when she turned around. No one cared about it except her.
So how long would it take her to get over it?
Now, she decided, with resolute determination. It was part of her life, it wasn’t going to go away.
“You look like you’re deep in thought, dear. Anything we can help with?”
Nikki took a deep breath and wiped her sweaty palms on her thighs.
“No,” she said and tried to smile. “I have to deal with this on my own, but everyone here has already gone a long way to helping. Thank you.”
The only thing she had left to deal with was the guilt over losing her friends and not being able to do anything to save them. Tears flooded her eyes.
“Oh, sweetie.” Judith moved and enveloped Nikki in a bear hug.
“I should have been with them,” Nikki whispered against Judith’s shoulder.
“With who? Your friends? Then without a doubt, you would be dead too.” Tieran rubbed circles on Nikki’s back.
Nikki nodded. She knew that. In the bottom of her heart, she knew Tieran spoke the truth, but it hurt. She had a feeling, years from now, it would still hurt. The only thing left to do was find justice for the lives of her friends. If she had to search until the day she died to find the man responsible, she would.
“Better now?”
“Yes.” She’d already convinced herself that night in the hospital there was nothing she could do to bring her friends back. She tried to shut out the imagery, tried not to think about it. For the most part, she’d held it together. Didn’t take much to bring it all to the forefront though. It would take her a long time to get over what she’d seen and stop missing her friends, but she would get passed it. Especially with these two women offering their undying support, or when she lay in Eli’s arms, nestled into his warmth and protection.
After a few more minutes, Judith released her from the bear hug and held her at arm’s length. Tears shimmered in her eyes.
“I have to go out of town for the next couple of days, but don’t ever think you can’t call me if you need to.” She gave a reassuring squeeze.
“Me too. God knows I’ve got my own amount of guilt for what I put Eli through way back when. I still haven’t forgiven myself for thinking he could have killed those… Well, we can have a pity party whenever you want. I’m a moody bitch right now anyway.” Tieran tucked Nikki into a hug. Her belly made it a little awkward and the baby responded to the sudden pressure by kicking out.
Nikki laughed and wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.
She would be okay.
Chapter Eleven
Nikki was gone. The second he opened his eyes, he knew she wasn’t in the room or the connecting bathroom. Eli bolted upright in their bed. Why the fuck hadn’t he sensed it before now? One of their security lights flared to life outside and beamed through the slit of the curtains on the bedroom window, illuminating the empty half of the bed. Distressed sheets told him she’d obviously fought a nightmare.
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