by C. A. Harms
I feel him smile against my mouth just before he kisses me. I have no idea how he expects me to carry on a conversation, a serious one at least, when he’s doing the things he’s doing. I swear to it he gets off on making me lose my ability to think, speak or even breathe regularly.
Soon the words are lost; between the both of us we find other things much more soothing. The way he touches me—it’s like nothing I’ve ever felt before. Nic is gentle and attentive, but he is also very dominant and assertive. The way he commands my body to react by teasing and touching is an unspoken art, so beautiful and pure. So very dirty.
I’ve never had one of those out of body experiences. You know the ones where you swear you're looking down at yourself, unable to imagine the person is you, until I met Nic. He brought out so many different things in me so quickly. It was freeing and I’ll admit it left me feeling so emotionally drained, it was flawless.
“You’re so perfect,” Nic growls as he slides inside me and pauses. I can feel his chest rising and falling against my own as he holds both my hands above my head in one of his. His other hand grips my hip tightly. “This just feels so right.”
I close my eyes tightly as he begins to move. I’m lost in the feel of his body pressing to mine, him moving inside of me as his warm breath fans out over my shoulder and jaw. It all just leaves me with my head spinning.
I know he is right; this is perfect. My fear is things in my life are never this simple. There is always a condition, a thorn in the beautiful display, something that makes the perfection taste bitter in the end.
“So small, but with mighty appetites,” Spencer says and I look up to find both him and Nic watching Gianna and I eat. I should feel shame, only I don’t.
“Wah,” Gianna answers with her mouth full. “Good,” or at least I think that is what she said. It is hard to tell really.
Nic leans back in his chair, lifting his beer to take a drink as he watches me. “It is good.” I shrug, lifting the slice up to take another large bite. I don’t care that the sauce drips off my finger and lands on the plate or that the cheese strings as I pull the pizza away. But when he leans in, takes his thumb to wipe away the sauce from the corner of my mouth, and brings his finger to his lips to lick it away, I swear I almost melt.
“It's delicious,” he finally says, and I stop mid-chew to stare at him.
“That was so hot,” Gianna mumbles and of course Nic smirks. “Like if I were wearing panties, I would need to change them.”
I choke, Nic scrunches up his eyebrows and looks over at Gia, and of course Spencer smiles proudly.
“Where is your filter?” It’s now my turn to speak with my mouth full.
“Pfft,” she huffs, “please, Em, you know damn well I’ve never had one.”
After we eat Gianna and I sneak away to the restroom, and I dodge her five-minute inquisition about Nic and me. The how’s the sex, does he make you laugh, I can see he cares for you her consistent pushing of me fades when we arrive back at our table.
When I attempt to sit down in my chair, Nic reaches out and grabs my hand, pulling me to his side instead. I sit on his lap, looking around to notice a few ladies looking at us with envy, and I quickly let go of my unsettled feelings. Instead, I place one of my arms over his shoulder, and when he leans in to kiss my cheek, I turn and press my lips to his instead.
“Mm,” he groans against my mouth, “you always taste so good.”
“Pizza and beer,” I say with a smile, and he shakes his head.
“No, it’s so much more.”
When he says things like that it leaves me a bit floored. I am so used to hearing things such as, “so elegant and glamorous,” or even “you are a woman of taste.” Those phrases all seem so impersonal, but with each word Nic speaks he makes me feel beautiful.
After one last kiss to my lips, I turn to find both Gianna and Spencer watching us. Spencer looks a little shocked maybe, but Gia is smiling big and bright. “You are both too cute.”
I feel my cheeks heat at her words and look down to avoid her stare.
As we leave the restaurant, Nic reaches out and links his hand with my own. It is sweet really, but also an action I am not used to. It was so laid back and youthful, and I had been forced to spend time with nothing more than a bunch of stiff, spineless men who walked around as if they had a stick up their ass, too mindful of those around them and what others may think instead of doing the things they desired. Nic is so unlike them. If he wants it, he takes it. If he feels it, he reacts. He doesn’t care who sees it or what they think of it.
We end up at the Willis Tower, even though I was opposed to it. Something about being on a glass balcony over a thousand feet in the air as I look down at the skyscrapers and streets below me makes me feel sheer panic.
Gianna, of course, is the first person to step out, spinning around in circles taking it all in. Spencer joins her without pause and all I can manage to think is, How much weight can that glass hold? I was panicking for them as my hands shook at my sides. They are insane, certifiably insane.
“You ready?” I look over at Nic and see him holding his hand out toward me.
“Me?” I ask, knowing there is no one else he is talking to, and his chest shakes with his laughter. “No,” I shake my head, “I’m gonna stay right here with more than a sheet of glass beneath my feet.”
“It’s much more than a sheet of glass.”
“That is so not the point.” Even I can hear the shakiness in my voice.
“What if I promise to keep you safe?”
“Even you, Mr. Strong and Powerful Detective,” I say as I arch my brow at him, “cannot save me from a panel of glass shattering beneath me as I plummet to my death. I’ll fall and go splat on the streets beneath me.”
“You’re even cuter when you get all freaked out.” He steps toward me and I step back, which makes him chuckle. “I thought you were tougher than this?”
“You thought wrong.” I cross my arms over my chest to hide the way they tremble. “I’m not a risk taker. I do not and will never find things like this thrilling. In fact, I find those that do completely insane.”
Nic continues to circle me, a smirk on his face that makes it difficult to keep my serious expression from faltering. Again he takes another step toward me and I step away.
“You went on the Ferris wheel with me.” He tilts his head just a small fraction, waiting for an explanation.
“I’m not afraid of heights.” He steps toward me again, and again I step away. “I’m afraid of the glass breaking away from beneath my feet and falling to my death, colliding with the ground below.”
“But the Ferris wheel could have fallen.” Another step.
“True, but at least there is a chance of survival there by falling into the water, or holding on to something within it. You can’t very well grab the glass that is broken all around you and increase your chances of survival.”
“It’s three layers of glass,” he says, as if it's going to convince me somehow that this is all okay. “Tempered for durability.” And again, this means nothing to me. “And you’ve been standing, safely, on it for the last two minutes.”
My heart feels as though it sinks deep into my stomach as its echoing beat sounds in my ears. I feel my face heat, but I refuse to move. I also refuse to look down, because if I do, I might cry.
“Are you okay?” I shake my head very slowly as I continue to stand very still, my arms crossed tightly over my chest as my nails dig into the palms of my hands. “Do you want me to rescue you?”
“You are such an ass.” He laughs when I whisper, as if saying it too loudly would only cause unnecessary movements. “When and if I survive this…” His laughter deepens, and I cringe. Please don’t shake the area around me screams in my mind. “I am so going to strangle you to within an inch of your life.”
“Oh my hell, Emerson.” I hear Gianna’s surprise, though I remain completely stiff and fearful. At least until she wraps her arms around me and
I stumble backward, further out into the glass enclosure of death. “You’re doing it,” she squeals, and does the worst possible thing ever—she bounces in delight. And what do I do? I scream in fear and run, right into Nic’s chest.
Nicholas
I exited my bedroom after my shower, still disappointed that Emerson had not joined me only to pause as I take in the sight before me. She is curled up on the couch, the blanket that had been draped over the back now securely wrapped around her body, and Jax lay at her side. The little asshole just lifted his head and purred at me as if he was bowing in triumph.
Is it possible for a cat to mock you? I mean, the guy used to be my bud but the moment he met Emerson, he quickly became my enemy, one that does all he can to butt right in between us and take her attention away from me.
I need a crate, one of those cat cages that he’d be forced to sleep in whenever she is here to ensure our time together is uninterrupted.
She sighs and stretches her arm above her head, taking away my focus from the purring traitor. Something invisible feels like it tugs at my heart and I even take the time to lift my hand to press against it. It feels right having her here, sharing my space with her. She is nothing like I thought she was, surprising me with each moment that passes. I know that what I am feeling for her won’t pass; it will only grow with time.
My phone rings from where it sits on the kitchen counter and I move across the room quickly before it wakes Em. Shannon’s number is lighting up the screen. I think of sending it to voicemail, but I know better. She is persistent and will keep calling, or worse yet—she will show up here to ensure I’m not ignoring her.
“Hey,” I say in a hushed whisper as I look up to ensure Emerson is still sleeping.
“Why are you whispering? I know you’re not in bed before eight at night.” I back up, stepping further into the small kitchen.
“I have company,” I reply, unable to keep the smile from taking over.
“A girl?” Shannon asks eagerly. “Wait, is it the girl? The one from the auction, the one that bought you?”
“Bought me?”
“You know what I mean.” I could almost picture her waving her hand outward as if to shush me. “Anyway, I thought you said things were complicated. Her being there doesn’t sound complicated at all. It sounds more like definite.”
Shannon doesn’t even wait for me to confirm that it is Emerson who is here. She just starts off with one question after another, making it hard to distinguish the difference between her and our overly aggressive mother. A mother who had not yet gotten wind of a woman being with me. I am sure she will know of Em’s existence the moment my sister hangs up with me then calls Mom to fill her in on the details.
“Nic?”
“Shannon?” I respond, still not giving her any details.
“You can tell me, or I can get in my car and drive over there. You can fill me in and save me from asking her myself.” I know she will do just that so there is no need to call her bluff.
“Yes, it's Emerson.”
“Pretty name.”
I ignore her and continue, hoping to make this quick so I can get back into the living room and join my girl on the couch. Mine. Still feels strange considering her that way.
“We’ve been spending more time together, this weekend to be exact, and I think things are becoming a little more clear.” She replies with an “mmhm,” expressing her need for more. “We’re getting to know each other.”
“Well, if the way she battled it out for you at the auction is any indication, I’d say she knows what she wants.” I smile, remembering the way she took on that determined look in her eyes, not even flinching when another woman placed a bid. Hell no, Emerson just shouted out some astronomical proposal and the room just stopped.
“Do me a favor.” A thought hit me. “If you ever meet her, can you not bring that up?”
“What do you mean if I ever meet her? I’ll meet her.”
“Soon,” I assured her, hoping that she will hold off a little longer to allow me to get to know Em better first. Shannon can be a little over the top, so the last thing I want is for her to terrify Emerson before I secure my place in her heart.
“You seem happy, Nic,” she tells me. “It sounds good on you.”
We say our goodbyes and end the call. I silence my ringer and replace the phone on the counter before moving back toward the couch. I expected to find Emerson still sleeping but instead see her sitting, her legs tucked beneath her, and still covered up. Jax sits perched on her lap, taking in her attention as she pets his head and back soothingly.
“Hi.” She offers a smile as she watches me move toward her. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”
“It’s okay,” I assure her as I lift the blanket at her side and slide beneath it too. “Though I’ll admit I did miss you in the shower.” I reached up and twisted a curl that had fallen at the side of her face, the silkiness of it gliding over my finger. Her eyes never once leave mine.
When I lean in to kiss her, Jax makes a displeased sound and swats at my chin. This action alone makes Emerson laugh. The little bastard has it out for me.
“I think he’s claimed me,” she states behind her laughter. “I don’t think he wants you close to me.”
“Tough shit,” I say, still staring at my cat that was once my friend. “Cranky ass needs to remember who feeds him.”
Jax is staring back at me, challenging me maybe to make another move. This shit is fucked up. I mean, come on, he is a fucking cat.
“I should get going anyway.” Long forgotten is Jax and his territorial actions. My chest feels tight as I think of Emerson leaving. “It’s late, and I have to work in the morning.”
“I think you should stay.” If she tries to leave, I’ll tie her to my bed. That thought creates a visual and my dick twitches. “You should stay.”
“I have to get back to my life at some point.” I didn’t like the sound of that.
“So are you trying to say that your life after you leave here won’t consist of this?” I motion between us. “Like the minute you walk out that door, you and me and the last couple days are forgotten?”
“No.” She didn’t sound convincing. “I’m just saying that we both have responsibilities that we need to handle outside of this happy little bubble we’ve been living in this weekend.”
“I’ve quite enjoyed this so-called bubble.” Enjoyed wasn’t a strong enough description.
“Me too.”
“Just stay tonight.” I push past the empty ache this conversation is beginning to give me. “I’ll take you home early enough for you to get ready for work in the morning.” I trace the contour of her jaw with the tip of my finger and watch as she leans into my touch. Her eyes flutter shut as she continues to pet Jax, then pauses on his back.
Take that little fucker. Would you believe that made me smile? I am pathetic.
“I’m not quite ready to let you slip back to reality yet.” Her lips curve upward to a sweet smile. “Never thought I’d love sharing my bed or my covers so much.”
I watch as her eyes slowly open and as she stares back at me, she is still wearing the same grin. “Okay,” she whispers and my heart races, “but you have to promise that you’ll let me get a few hours of sleep at least. I have a long day tomorrow and you carry a gun during yours, so you need to be alert.”
“Promise.” Suddenly the idea of keeping her awake all night long panting and moaning wasn’t the first thing on my mind. Holding her close, feeling her body pressed to mine, and hearing her soft breathing is all I needed.
I remember what the woman who led the auction said just before the evening came to an end. “Enjoy your evening and who knows, maybe there was a little magic created here tonight.”
I’m not a dreamer or a romantic, or so I thought. I just know that whatever is taking place between Emerson and me—it sure feels a little magical.
Emerson
I wake to the sound of Jax meowing from the next roo
m. It is a soft cry but enough to make me crawl out of Nic’s bed in search of the cat. He stands near the counter looking up, like he’s waiting for something.
“Are you hungry, buddy?” I ask as I step around him and start to open one cabinet after the other. After the third one, I find a small bag of cat food and immediately he begins circling my legs, bumping his head against my shins.
I’d always wanted a cat or even a dog as a child, but my father referred to them as a nuisance. As I got older, I guess I developed a resistance to that urge. But being here, cuddling with this furry little guy, reminds me of why I’d always longed for a pet. They love you no matter what. It’s a love I’d gone without for most of my life.
They say you never know what you're missing if you’ve never had it before. Well, this is something I’ve never had before. It’s the same with Nic—that closeness, that feeling of being wanted.
I tilt the bag and give him just enough to fill the bottom half of his bowl before tucking the bag back into the cabinet. With a gentle pat on his head, I begin to walk back toward the bedroom just as Nic steps out of the doorway. He halts, his hand running through his hair that sticks up in all different directions. His eyes squint, shielding the light spilling in from the kitchen.
“Everything okay?” he asks, taking another step toward me.
I nod.
“Because when I woke up and you were gone—”
“You thought I skipped out on you,” I finished his sentence. It’s his turn to nod. “I heard Jax and went to check on him.” He grinned as he arched a brow. “He was hungry.”
“I am beginning to feel as though you just want me for my cat.”
“I thought I was hiding it so well.” Have I said how much I adore this banter with Nic? Because I do. Things are comfortable, too easy maybe. I am so used to challenges and expectations, but with him it’s you get what you see, no need to pretend to be something else. I can’t remember a time before this that I’d ever felt so relaxed.