by Maddie Foxx
* * *
Tessa stared out the window on the way home.
“So, what’s going on with you and Raphael and Seth?” Angus asked.
“Nothing. We were just talking. I’m not about to get into anything physical with anyone just yet. I have more important things to worry about right now.”
“I hope you’re not worrying about what happened in the saloon with Jason. He’s a complete lowlife. It was nice to see a woman showing him up for a change. If he ever hurts another woman, I’ll be a whole lot less civil than you were.”
“I hardly think knocking the man across the room is civil, but he shouldn’t have called me a bitch. That sets me off whenever anyone calls me that. You might say I’ve been in a relationship with something less than a gentleman, once. Luckily, I didn’t stay with him long enough to permanently mar me.”
“It really angers me to hear any woman being abused, even verbally.”
“That’s what will make you a keeper when you meet the right woman. I can imagine you’d cherish her with your last breath.”
Angus made the turn into Shadow Creek. “Well, we both know that won’t ever happen. I’m satisfied with just protecting everyone who lives at Shadow Creek.”
Tessa held her tongue. The last thing she needed was to tell him she was planning on leaving. Angus was really like a big brother to her since she had arrived. At first, she felt that he liked her more than that, but with how things had gone since she was turned, she couldn’t make promises. The truth was she just didn’t feel that way about him, which she knew he was aware of at that point. He was one of the nicest shifters she’d ever met. Brendan and Chase treated Katlyn like she was made of glass. For her, though, she wasn’t all that sure what would happen if and when she left, but she was excited about the possibilities.
Angus stopped the truck, dropping her off. She didn’t feel like heading inside so she walked over to the swing, which was attached to a tree. Tessa sat down and began to swing just as Chase drew closer.
“Hello, Tessa. Anything exciting happening in town tonight?”
“Oh, you know, the usual. Jason Traxler and one of his idiot friends showed up. I guess where he went wrong was calling me a Shadow Creek bitch.”
Chase sighed. “What did Angus do to him?”
“Nothing, I wouldn’t let him. I, on the other hand, knocked the fool to the door. I didn’t think he’d slide all the way there. I don’t know my own strength.”
“Th-That’s funny, if I didn’t worry that people might figure out who you really are. Brendan would throw a fit if he knew.”
A voice came from behind them. “Throw a fit if I knew what, exactly?”
Tessa put her feet down, stopping the swing. “You really shouldn’t sneak up on anyone like that. It might one day cause a person to have a heart attack, if I wasn’t already dead.”
“You’re not dead, Tessa. You’re very much alive, if only you’d allow yourself to live that way,” Brendan said with a smile visible beneath the outside light. “And sneaking up on someone helps me find out what’s going on around this ranch, but I suspect that’s not what you two are talking about here.”
“She had an altercation with Jason Traxler and shoved him across the saloon.”
“This story is getting bigger all the time,” Tessa said, frowning. “I gave him a shove, but he slid on his back all the way to the door. He suspects I might be a shifter now, I think.”
“That would be better than for him to think you’re a vampire. Nobody outside the shifter population in the area even knows Paige is a vampire besides Clayton. It would be much better if it remains our little secret. The truth would have ramifications that I don’t want to even think about,” Brendan said.
“I didn’t mean to do that. I guess I lost my temper after he called me a bitch. That always makes me see red.”
“He’s a menace, that I’ll admit, and in time he’ll have to be dealt with, but I don’t want for you to be the one to handle him. I’ve been waiting until he gets out of line with Carrie again. She might have abandoned her daughter Melody to be with him, but so far, I have no evidence to suggest he’s been abusing Carrie.”
“Oh, and when was the last time you have seen Carrie?”
“Actually, just yesterday. She was flying in the back field.”
“So you only saw her in shifted form, then?”
“Yes, but I saw that as a promising sign since she hasn’t shifted to the red-tailed hawk form in quite a while.”
“And you’re sure it was really her?”
“Why all these questions, Tessa?”
How could she tell Brendan that she suspected Jason was still abusing Carrie? She couldn’t just yet until she had proof, but if she did find out he continued to beat Carrie, she’d take care of Jason for good.
“I’m just concerned, is all.” Tessa gazed at the moon, listening to the howls of wolves in the distance. She wondered if one of them was Raphael. She then changed subjects. “I’m sure Katlyn must have told you that I plan to leave Shadow Creek.”
“What?” Chase asked. “You can’t be seriously planning to leave?”
“That’s out of the question. You’ve barely been turned and you think you can leave our fold this soon? I won’t hear of it,” Brendan said.
Tessa had expected Brendan to act like this, and she wasn’t about to allow him to dictate to her how she’d lead her life as a vampire.
“Try like ten months ago. I knew you’d feel that way, but Brendan, I need to leave. Otherwise, how will I ever figure out things for myself? You’ve never allowed me to even find food for myself.”
“You can’t feed, you know that.”
“I have the blood Paige gets for me and the animals you all leave at my door. I won’t be treated this way and I’m leaving, no matter what you think.”
Brendan swept a hand through his dark hair. “I never meant it in a bad way. We were just trying to help.”
“Well, it’s no help at all. I’ll speak to Paige tomorrow and I’ll be leaving once I figure out where I should go.”
“We can’t protect you if you go,” Chase said with a sigh.
“I don’t need protecting. I’m a vampire, remember?”
“I know, but you can’t just bite a human to protect yourself, unless you plan on turning them.”
“There are other ways. I know how to make sure nobody ever comes back as a vampire. Paige has taught me that much.”
“If you plan to go on a murder rampage,” Brendan said. “They’ll be on the hunt for you for sure then.”
“Look, I’m not planning to go on any kind of rampage, but know this—if trouble comes to me, I’ll do whatever I can to protect myself.”
“I can see we’re at an impasse, so let’s not talk about this now. Tomorrow evening, meet us at the main house when you speak to Paige. I just hope she plans to talk you out of this,” Brendan said.
Tessa hopped off the swing and said, “Until tomorrow night.”
She walked to her cabin, more rattled than she wanted to let on. Brendan reacted exactly how she’d expected him to, but she hoped Paige would be on her side. Only she could explain to them how she might feel. Even mountain lion shifters like them had limitations when it came to knowing exactly how she felt.
Tessa opened the refrigerator and took out a bag of blood, pouring a glassful. She put the remainder away and slugged the cold blood back. It wasn’t all that bad when it came to blood. It was just the temperature she had a problem with.
She climbed the stairs after washing her glass when she finished her beverage. What else could she do but sleep? It was pitch black when she felt her way to the bed, pulling off her clothes and slipping between the sheets, loving how the coolness felt against her skin. Tessa tried not thinking about Raphael as she hugged her naked body. Had she made a mistake the other night when she left Raphael and Seth so soon? That night, she’d thought she was ready to experiment, but the thing was she wasn’t all that sure she wan
ted both of them.
CHAPTER FOUR
Raphael dropped off Maxwell and Melody at the schoolhouse at Shadow Creek. Katlyn was outside like normal as she greeted the children.
“Hello, Maxwell and Melody. You’re the last to arrive today. Why don’t you join Ivan and Joel inside?”
Melody gave Raphael a quick hug, but Maxwell didn’t even look at him as he entered the schoolhouse.
Katlyn frowned. “Maxwell certainly is having trouble adjusting to his father’s death. I tried to speak to him once about it, but he wasn’t in the talking mood. I have since backed off.”
“Yes. He’s been rebellious of late, but Palina seems to think he’ll come around in time.”
“I agree. He just needs our support. When he decides to reach out, we need to be there, but I don’t have to explain that to you, of all people. It seems it would be easier for a man to understand a boy than a woman.”
“I can’t say I agree with you there. He’s been more distant of late.”
“He’ll come around, I’m sure, but that’s not what I wanted to speak to you about. I just wondered if you knew why Tessa would want to leave Shadow Creek.”
“I think she really is just trying to find herself in the world. This vampire thing has her tail spinning out of control. I’m not involved in any way about her decision, I assure you. That’s all I know, really. I’ll pick up the children after school.”
Raphael left before Katlyn said anything else. He had no idea why Tessa wanted to leave for sure, but he could understand it. It was obvious Katlyn wouldn’t allow Tessa to find her wings if she stayed at Shadow Creek. He just didn’t want to be put in the middle of anything that would pit him against Brendan and Chase. If Tessa made the decision to leave, it had to be hers alone to make.
* * *
Tessa enjoyed the hot spray of the water over her scorched skin. Her body was encased in sweat when she awoke and she had a knot in her stomach that wouldn’t go away. She dreaded meeting with Paige later that night. It was her against Paige, Brendan, Chase, and Katlyn. She didn’t like the odds as they were certainly not stacked in her favor. She was just resolved that she needed to make the move, and soon. The longer she stayed there, the harder it would be to leave.
Dressed in black jeans, shirt and knee-length boots, Tessa made the trek to the main house. It seemed like it took an entire day to get there since she so dreaded it, but really that walk only took five minutes, perhaps ten with the way she was dragging her feet. She didn’t know how it would go, but she expected she’d have to battle for her freedom, which she shouldn’t even have to do. It should be a given that she’d want to branch out on her own.
Paige greeted her at the door and she smiled slightly in greeting. “Hello, Paige.”
“You look like you’re going to a funeral. I assure you, it won’t be anything like that, Tessa.” She gave Tessa’s shoulder a squeeze. “I’m in your corner.”
That relieved Tessa a hundredfold, but what she was most concerned with was Katlyn and how she might feel. All she wanted to do was find herself, but she wasn’t cold-hearted enough not to think of her best friend. They had been through a race to Wyoming to escape the Shifter Patrol that was after Katlyn. Tessa wasn’t about to allow her friend to go that far solo. She was more of a friend than she had ever known and she wasn’t willing to lose her, even if it meant staying. Tessa just hoped it wouldn’t come to that.
Tessa walked through the great room with a huge stone fireplace. The vaulted ceilings were far over her head and she admired the smell of leather from the furniture. There was a fire and Tessa stopped when Paige made a detour, tossing in another log. When she was satisfied that the flames licked upward, she led the way into the dining room where Brendan, Chase, and Katlyn were already seated, enjoying steak, baked potatoes, and bowls of salad smeared with ranch dressing. It was the type of meal Tessa would have enjoyed, but since she was turned, nothing tasted as good as blood.
“Have a seat, Tessa. I have a rare steak for you,” Paige said.
The chairs in the dining room were plush and that at least made Tessa comfortable, even though she felt amongst a roomful of sharks.
Paige returned with a plate of rare steak, blood pooling on the plate beneath it. When it was set down, Tessa put a finger in the blood, sucking on her finger and enjoying the metallic taste. It wasn’t lost on her that Katlyn’s face paled at watching her. She’d always gotten woozy at the sight of blood, like that time when Katlyn had tried to stanch the flow of blood when Tessa had cut her finger with a boning knife. Tessa massaged the scar on her finger at the remembrance of that painful incident.
Tessa jarred herself out of her thoughts by saying, “Thanks, Paige.”
Paige nodded as she sat. “Eat up, everyone. It’s not many times that we’re all here together for dinner.”
“Where are the babies tonight?” Tessa asked.
“Angus is babysitting,” Katlyn responded. “They really seem to love him.”
“Well, he is a gentle soul. I hope one day he’ll find a mate all his own.”
“Me, too,” Katlyn said with a smile.
They ate in silence, and Tessa couldn’t help but notice how it still seemed to bother Katlyn to even glance at her plate. Tessa could emphasize with that since she’d always felt the same way whenever someone she dined with had a rare steak. It was barely warm enough, but it was the blood in every bite that thrilled Tessa’s taste buds.
Dishes of ice cream were served after dessert and Tessa smiled, as she loved the creamy texture. She relished how it reminded her of growing up and how her mother treated them with ice cream after ever meal. That seemed like an eternity ago.
Paige pushed herself away from the table. “Let’s go into the great room. The fire should be going great about now.”
Tessa followed Paige and felt like a lamb about to be led to slaughter. She sat on a leather chair, facing what she thought of as her opposition.
“Let’s get this started,” Tessa began. “I would like to leave Shadow Creek. I mean, I am leaving.”
“Why?” Katlyn said. “I need you.”
“You have two mates and twins to worry about now. It’s not like I plan to go far, or leave the area. I’ll visit plenty.”
“Where will you go?”
“I’m not sure yet. I just know it’s time.”
“What do you think about it, Paige?” Brendan asked.
Paige leaned back against the sofa. “I can understand where Tessa is coming from. Of course in my case, I had to flee London before I was forced to live with the man who turned me. It was never a choice for me.”
“We won’t be able to protect her if she lives off the ranch,” Brendan insisted.
“She’s a vampire. She doesn’t need to be protected.”
“She can’t protect herself by attacking humans. There was a problem in town just last night when she shoved Jason Traxler across the floor.”
“I’m sure she had a good reason. It’s not like she bit that man. Not a good choice for a vampire,” Paige said to Tessa. “Of course, you do have to be careful not to reveal yourself as one.”
“Isn’t there a cabin at Shadow Creek, not as close to the main house, that Tessa would feel more comfortable in?” Katlyn asked with earnest. “That way, she’d have her space.”
“Yes, there are a few,” Brendan replied. “That would be a better idea than her leaving outright.”
Tessa pushed herself off the chair. “It’s nice of you all to decide what’s best for me, but what you fail to realize is that it’s not what I want. I want to move off this ranch, and there’s nothing you can say to stop me.”
“How will you pay for that?” Katlyn asked. “It’s expensive to live on your own.”
“I’m not an idiot, Katlyn. I know that.”
“No need to fight, ladies,” Paige said. “I’d be more than willing to pay for Tessa’s way until such a time as she doesn’t need the help. It’s the least I can do after all I’
ve done to her.”
“This isn’t about getting away from you, Katlyn, or even Paige. I just have to figure out who I really am now.”
“You’re Tessa, my best friend who gave up her life to come with me to Wyoming when I was in trouble,” Katlyn said. “To me, you’re the same person. You being a vampire hasn’t changed how I think about you.”
“If only I felt that way, but I just don’t. I barely recognize myself when I look in the mirror, which I can’t even do anymore, by the way.”
“I can lend you a special mirror that actually works for us vampires,” Paige suggested. “I’m sorry I didn’t think about it before.”
Tessa’s face lit up. “That would be great. Tomorrow I’ll start checking out places to stay.”
“Of course, there are a few other ranches that might work for you,” Chase said. “Like Shady Creek. It’s run by the werebears.”
“Or Silver Creek,” Katlyn said with a wink.
“I can’t ask anyone to take me in like that.”
“You won’t have to. I can ask around for you,” Brendan said. “If you live amongst shifters I won’t worry so much about you, but I’m not pressing you on it. It’s totally up to you where you live. It’s just that besides one of the ranches near Creeksboro, there is only the boarding house in town. It gets pretty noisy there at night with all the drunks who room there when they’re too sloshed to drive home.”
“Seth has a room there and that’s exactly what he did last night,” Tessa said.
“Take your time, Tessa,” Chase said. “There’s no rush, is there?”
“No. I just want to be clear that I will be leaving just as soon as I find a place. I don’t want to get any guff from any of you about it, either.”
Katlyn crossed the room and gave Tessa a tight hug. When she let go, she said, “I’m not trying to be selfish. I just want what’s best for you, and I will miss you horribly if you leave.”
Tears gathered in Tessa’s eyes, but she blinked them back. “I know, but this is no reflection on you, I assure you. If it doesn’t work out, I’ll come back if I can.”