by Rula Sinara
Andi pushed aside her job worries. Finding a place to live was a much bigger challenge. And she needed a house or an apartment right now. She and Brooke were staying in a cottage Lark owned and had lived in with her son, Evan. It was cozy and homey, but it was available for only another week, because Lark and Miles were expecting guests and were putting them up in the cottage.
Away from the lights and the party atmosphere of the marina now, Andi kept walking across the grass, alone with her bundles of mixed feelings. She ought to be grateful she could stay in Lark’s cottage. Well, she was grateful. But as much as she liked her ex’s new wife, Andi was embarrassed she needed to accept Lark’s offer.
At the moment, her daughter was spending an exciting weekend in Chicago with her dad and Lark, and Evan, Brooke’s stepbrother. For Brooke, the high point was the plan to ride the Ferris wheel at Navy Pier. She’d been talking about it for weeks.
Suddenly, the humidity on the hot evening seemed to trap her, and she brushed her hand across the back of her neck. The ground was soft under her feet as she slipped deeper into the darkness and approached the quiet docks. An isolated spot, it was peaceful and set apart from the marina, where people were always coming and going.
The docks belonging to Donovan Marine Supply were usually empty. She’d seen only one boat tied up there and it was gone by the time she and Brooke had passed by again on the way back to the cottage.
Tonight was different, though. Something had changed. Even in the dim light, she saw what looked like a large boat tied up with a row of fenders hanging from the rail to protect the hull from bumping against the wooden dock. The boat was closed up, with no light coming from inside. But even in the yellowish glow coming from the low light mounted at the end of the dock, Andi saw that the boat was amazing.
An amazing wreck.
The boat in front of her was unlike any yacht or runabout she’d seen at the Two Moon Bay docks—or anywhere else. This boat was a pile of ruined varnish and cracked or missing wood. From what she could see the boat was dying from neglect. Andi almost laughed out loud. Those were the exact words she’d used when she’d first seen the house she and Miles bought right after they were married. That house was such a wreck the cracks in the plaster had looked like roads and highways on a map. Someone had painted over the original oak woodwork, and the kitchen would have made a great exhibit in a Depression-era museum. But the previous owner’s estate had installed a new roof and repaired the foundation. Andi had instinctively known the house had strong bones, but badly needed a face-lift to restore its glory.
Staring at the boat, Andi had a feeling the yacht was a lot like her old house. For sure, the fixer-upper boat’s to-do list would be as long as the dock itself. What a huge undertaking. Then why was her heart beating a little faster? She immediately dismissed her own surprising reaction. Did she really want to clutch a scraper in her hand and get to work? As a matter of fact, yes, it was an appealing idea. She didn’t know a lot about large motor yachts, but something in her longed to brighten up this floating mass of wood.
Andi started when her phone vibrated in her pocket, but she guessed it would be Brooke and hurried to answer.
“Hi, Mom.”
Better than cheery, Brooke sounded excited.
“Well, hello. Are you enjoying yourself in the big city?” Her mood lifted at the sound of her daughter’s voice.
“We’re at Navy Pier eating fudge ice cream,” Brooke said. “We rode the Ferris wheel, and it was great. And we went to the aquarium today. You should see the sharks—and the dolphins.”
“Sounds like fun.” She walked away from the dock, but before she got too far, she pivoted and took another look at the boat. Nothing in the marina was as isolated as that lone yacht.
“Wait, Mom. Dad wants to talk to you a minute.”
“Okay, put him on,” Andi said, taking a few more steps away from the boat.
“Hey, Andi,” Miles said, “any news?”
“About a roof over my head, you mean? And Brooke’s.” Andi winced at the sarcastic tone coming out of her mouth. Where had it come from? Frustration? Misplaced resentment? Miles didn’t mean anything negative by the question.
“Oops, sorry, Miles,” she said quickly. “Don’t mind me. I’m mad at myself. Somehow, this move didn’t go at all the way I planned it.”
“It will work out. And like I told you, you can stay in the cottage another week or so, and then move back in when our guests leave.”
Andi knew exactly what was coming next. If she still hadn’t found a place to live, she and Brooke were welcome to stay with Miles and Lark. They had plenty of space, and Brooke had her own room fixed up exactly as she wanted it. She spent almost half her time in Miles’s house, anyway. Andi would be welcome to the guest room. It was a generous offer. Andi knew that. Just like she knew she couldn’t bring herself to stay there.
“We talked about that, and you know how I feel, Miles. It would be too odd for Brooke. She’s used to going between my house and your house. It’s been her life since she was a toddler. She adjusted well to being with you and Lark and Evan. But stay in your house? I don’t think so.”
“You wouldn’t be here for long. Only until things settle in for you in Two Moon Bay, Andi. It would only be for a week or two.”
“Look, I’ll get vacation rentals a week or two at a time, or we’ll stay in one of the residential hotels,” she said, annoyed by the turn of the conversation. “It’s not the best solution, but it’s better than being with Brooke in the same house with you and Lark and her son.” Such a nightmarish solution. Andi would do almost anything to avoid it.
“You make it sound like a punishment for something,” Miles said, uncharacteristic resentment seeping into his voice. “You’re telling me you’d rather be alone with Brooke in a hotel than with her in my house.”
“Yes, Miles, that’s precisely what I’m saying.” She paused. “Give me a minute to spell this out for you.” It was hard to gather her thoughts with the background noise coming from Miles’s phone. Between a loud blues band, a mix of voices and the wind producing a static sound, it was nearly impossible to hear him. She kicked her voice up a notch. “I’m on my way back to the cottage now. Can we talk later? I’d like you to understand.”
“Okay, I’ll call you in an hour or so.”
With the call ended, Andi retraced her steps back across the grass and through the marina and down a few blocks of the waterfront street. She was soon unlocking the front door to Lark’s cottage on Night Beach Road. She fixed herself a plate of cheese and crackers and made short work of what she decided was dinner. Then she poured herself a glass of merlot and sat in the window seat to wait for Miles’s call.
Andi barely knew Lark, but it was easy to picture Brooke’s stepmom raising Evan in this cottage, working at her desk in front of this large picture window with its view of the lake. It was still Lark’s office, except when she and Miles had company staying here, like now. Then she worked in her office in their new house just down the street.
Andi thought about all the reasons she believed moving to Two Moon Bay was good for Brooke. But the logical, sound reasons for making such a major change only explained about 90 percent of her rationale. Andi hadn’t confided to anyone about the other reasons that pushed her toward her decision. It was hunger, she thought. She was hungry for something different in her life. After years of successfully managing a large medical practice, she’d been a casualty of a merger with a larger medical group. Luckily, she was a saver so she wasn’t living hand-to-mouth. She’d also accepted a few temp assignments over the last eighteen months and that helped cover her expenses. She had the luxury of holding out for a good professional opportunity.
When she’d first started her job search, a couple of medical practices had come looking for her, even coaxing her to agree to interviews, but they made such lowball offers she’d turned them dow
n flat. She was determined to think bigger, not smaller. Or, what was stopping her from changing fields altogether, maybe taking off in a new direction?
Deciding to move to Two Moon Bay had been bound up in that exciting notion of a fresh start. All that work to renovate her house increased its value and the profit from its sale bought her more time to figure out what she wanted. The sale happened much faster than she or the Realtor had anticipated. The offer was well above the asking price, but in order to take advantage of it, she’d agreed to a closing date that allowed her almost no time to find a permanent rental.
Andi sipped her wine and stared at the narrow reflection of the new moon breaking through the haze over the lake. Where had her logical mind gone? None of these short-term problems would matter if she was judging her situation rationally. These were setbacks, minor at that, but they brought back long buried memories of other times she’d just as soon forget.
Like the air, the lake was still tonight. That sad old boat she’d seen was probably barely moving at the dock.
Odd that she would think of that boat. But there was something about it. But what?
Miles’s call broke into her thoughts.
“So?” he asked.
“So,” she said back, “here it is. You know I agreed to get out of the house in Green Bay without enough time to organize the move or find a rental, let alone buy a new place. I feel bad about that. Here I am, with my reputation as a hotshot manager, but I mismanaged this entire situation.”
“But I keep trying to tell you it’s okay,” he said with an impatient sigh. “We all know it’s temporary. We have room for you. This is about you, Andi, not me...or anyone else.”
Lark. He means it’s not about her. But Andi knew that. Using her thumb and index finger, she rubbed her forehead as if that action could produce the words that would help him understand. “I know this sounds overblown, but it feels chaotic, Miles,” she finally said. “On some level, not having a job or a house reminds me of the days after our divorce when I made so many mistakes.”
She was talking in code, as if not spelling it out would soften the blow. Who was she kidding? The blow was landing on her, not Miles. “I married Roger so fast, and it was such a disaster. The next year was a mess. You were the one who kept life stable for Brooke.”
“Oh, Andi, that was years ago,” Miles said softly. “I can’t believe you’re linking that old mistake with this situation. They’re entirely different. Anyone would have jumped at the offer you got for the house and figured out how to meet the terms later.”
Andi laughed. “You’re right, logically, that is. I guess this is stress talking. And Brooke was crabby about packing up so fast. That’s what brings up the same old feelings that I failed her—again. But I’d rather we move into a residential hotel until I find something. Better than having her mom staying with her dad and his new wife. A woman her dad knew long before he met her mom. It’s complicated, Miles.” Unintentionally, the volume of her voice had increased so she was almost hollering at him. “Sorry, Miles, I’m not mad at you.”
“I get it, but you’re being too hard on yourself. I’ve never criticized you as a mom. Never.”
Now he was getting mad. Another unintended consequence of the quandary she’d created.
“And one more thing. You’re taking Brooke’s bad moods way too seriously,” Miles said, his voice normal again. “Change is hard.”
Andi let out a long, weary sigh. “That’s true. But her riding camp starts soon. I’m hoping being around horses will improve her attitude.”
With a laugh in his voice, Miles said, “She’s told Evan all about her camp in great detail. That kid is so patient, and he’s only fourteen.”
“It’s worked out well for you. The move, I mean, and you and Lark.”
“Yes.” He paused. “I’m not trying to hurt you with this offer of a room in our house. Neither is Lark.”
His gentle tone triggered the growing fullness behind her eyes, but she wasn’t ready to let down her emotional barrier, not even with Miles. “True enough. But try to understand what’s behind my thinking. You and I get along well, and all that, and as much as I rooted for you and Lark, I simply can’t be under the same roof with you two.” She snickered. “That was blunt enough, I hope.”
“Handle it your way,” Miles said matter-of-factly. “I won’t bring it up again.”
She felt lighter. A burden was lifted, and suddenly a hotel suite didn’t seem so bad. She was tempted to tell Miles about other things going on with her, but she held back. They were friendly, but he wasn’t an intimate friend. Besides, she didn’t even know what was going on inside her, or why she was stirred up about change.
They ended the call and Andi immediately searched for local hotels that offered the kind of room she and Brooke would need. Of course, she thought, when the Sleepy Moon Inn came up. She’d seen it on the edge of downtown, only a few blocks away. She searched the site for vacancies, and when the information came up, she made a reservation and breathed a little easier.
Thinking about her exchange with Miles, she realized it was a good thing she hadn’t spontaneously confided her nagging wish for something different, a new direction. Wow. Those were the words she’d used years ago when she’d foolishly told him she wanted a divorce, claiming marriage—to anyone—wasn’t right for her and she needed another path.
Andi shivered inside, thinking of how ridiculous that sounded to her now.
Enough. Look ahead, not back. Her personal motto, particularly after her job ended.
Andi slipped out of her jeans and tank top and pulled her sleep shirt over her head. Going through her nightly routine helped put a stop to the useless journey into the worst part of her past. As she smoothed moisturizer across her cheeks, she struggled to recapture her excitement over the decision to move to Two Moon Bay. But the move itself was only one part of it.
She felt her old patterns shifting. Maybe it was because Brooke was growing up and needed her less. In any case, the changes weren’t limited to the mundane stuff, like finding an apartment or a predictable, if dull job in the same field. Except for a couple of huge mistakes, each involving a man, she’d lived cautiously, maybe too much so. She was always guarding against throwing her life—and Brooke’s—into disarray. Now she wanted more.
Andi fluffed the pillow and turned on her side. Closing her eyes, she decided that if she ended up in the hotel suite, she’d turn it into an adventure for herself and Brooke. She’d convince Brooke it was like camping out but without the bugs. Whoever built that run-down old boat she’d seen earlier must have wanted something out of the ordinary. So why shouldn’t she?
Copyright © 2018 by Virginia McCullough
ISBN-13: 9781488085048
The Twin Test
Copyright © 2018 by Rula Sinara
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