by Violet Paige
“Yes,” I called the short distance from the stove where I was sautéing our dinner to the breakfast nook where she was doing her work.
“And one for Aunt Emma too. She said she could make it.”
Aria’s eyes lite up at the news. Even though Emma was no relation to her, Aria had called her Auntie from the day she could speak. It probably didn’t help that Em liked to spoil her rotten.
“I’ll be able to stick it to Penelope then,” Aria said.
“What does that mean?”
“Well Madame said we each only get a certain number of tickets. Penelope wanted to take mine because both her grandparents want to come. I told her she couldn’t though. Now at least Auntie will take one of the seats.”
I knew Aria always struggled with us having such a small family. I was an only child and with no other side to speak of, it had made me think we were close knit. For Aria I suspected it felt empty.
It was strange in that moment, for the first time since picking up Aria from school, my mind went to Dr. Barrett Harris again.
Seven
Barrett
I tossed again in my bed and looked over at my clock. It was just after 3am. I hadn’t slept a wink. In fact I hadn’t really slept since the day that Lilly Walters walked into my office.
Part of me was desperate to reconnect with her, to know if that baby she had was mine. It seemed to be eating me inside out.
The logical side of my brain told me that the possibility was pretty slim. We had one night together. The likelihood of that producing a child was slim to none.
Along with the torment of finding a way to speak with her again, I also had the constant replay of our brief encounter in my mind. Every time I closed my eyes, I remembered how she felt around my erection.
Finally, deciding I wasn’t going to get any sleep that night, I rose and dressed for the gym. If I was lucky maybe I could exhaust myself into some sleepless dreams.
My mind was full of statistics as I pumped weight. The chances of our encounter resulting in a pregnancy. It may have seemed unlikely, but so was seeing her again after all these years.
I never was one to believe in fate or a higher power, but there was something that had brought us together again.
I had debated letting her test results take the usual course over the last few days. It was office protocol that once the results were in, one of the girls at the front desk would make the call to inform the patients.
Only in circumstances of negative results was the doctor supposed to get involved and perhaps make the call myself. Lilly's results had returned yesterday completely normal.
I should have just let the receptionist handle it, but I couldn’t pass up the excuse. I had insisted making this call on his own.
So instead of sleeping that night, I was burning calories at the gym anticipating hearing her voice again. It would be unethical to lie and say she needed to come back in for more tests.
I was racking my brain for any sane excuse to have her come back in to the office.
Finally as the sun started to rise on the horizon I came up with the plan. I wouldn’t tell her anything. Just that we needed to discuss her results in person. I didn’t care if it would raise some brows in the office, I wanted to see her again and I was going to make it happen.
I got back to my place just in time to shut off the alarm clock on my bedside table. It wouldn’t be the first day going to work with little sleep and heaping exhaustion.
Spending the last few years with the red cross had taught me to keep a clear mind even when my body was beyond the breaking point. The places we went to get to people who needed help the most didn’t often come with luxury accommodation and mints on pillows.
I had relished that adventure. It was a million times better than the dull upper crust life I had been raised in.
Sure treating children in bomb laden third world countries had it’s disadvantages, but it was worth it to see someone on the brink of death recover. Out there I had been making a true difference.
I thought about what I did now. Spending my days between menopausal old ladies and teaching teenagers how to use birth control, wasn’t that what I had wanted?
It was worth it just to piss off the old man, though.
He had always considered my time with the Red Cross a phase that would run its course. He didn’t see the good that a high education could bring to the less fortunate. To him a doctorate was a fast tract to continuing the family fortune.
When I chose my own path separate from him, it was an irrational and inconceivable move in his eyes.
It was true that I wasn’t exactly thrilled with my own practice now, and choosing the speciality I had taken, but it was my own way and not his. That was satisfying enough to me. Now I had one more reason to be grateful for it. It had brought me back to the girl of my dreams.
Eight
Lilly
I was wringing my hands as I waited for Emma to come over. I didn’t know what was worse, the fact that I was called back into the doctor's office after some routine test or the fact that it was Aria’s dad who had been on the other line of the phone.
When he has spoken to me, it seemed nothing short of professional. At least that might mean he had no idea who I was or at the very least that we had a child together. But that didn’t stop the fact that I was going to have to see him again today.
I wasn’t going to be able to do that alone. So luckily I had my best friend to the rescue. Emma had promised to go with me.
I was beyond stressing out over this whole situation. I hadn’t slept well and was sure I looked it.
I checked my reflection one last time. I was wearing a little more makeup then I normally did and had taken the painstaking time to curl my hair this morning. I couldn’t help but smile at the fact that I was trying to recreate the same look, minus the revealing outfit, eight years ago.
It wasn’t so much because I wanted him to recognize me. More I wanted to prove to myself I was still the pre-pregnancy self that I had once been. For the last eight years I have thought of myself as nothing more then mom and breadwinner. It was a strange experience to attempt to be attractive again.
Emma came over and we piled into my old jeep to head over to the doctors office together.
“Promise me you’ll stay with me the whole time.”
“I’m pretty sure you are freaking out over nothing. I’m sure everything is fine,” Emma responded as we parked in the medical buildings parking lot.
“I don’t just mean that,” I said quickly.
“Oh, you mean so you don’t tell doctor Hottie you had his baby,” Emma retorted with a wink.
“Yeah, though now I don’t exactly trust you not to,” I retorted.
Finally, after ten painstaking minutes in the waiting room my name was called. I stood and turned to Emma when she didn’t do the same.
“You’re fine, you got this,” she said while grabbing a magazine to flip through.
“I thought you were coming with me,” I motioned and hissed at her.
I felt like an errant child who didn’t want to see the doctor without her mommy besides her.
“No, I’m good here,” Emma said with a cynical smile.
It was obvious she was going to make me go though this on my own. All the thoughts I had about her being such an awesome best friend were quickly fading away.
I wasn’t going to let the rest of the office see me faulted however, especially since it was that same nurse who had called me back.
I lifted my chin ever so slightly before turning to follow the nurse into the back of the office. My heart was full of trepidation but I was determined not to show it.
Instead of walking me to one of the normal rooms we snaked along the corridor until we came before an office. The door was shut but I could see Barrett already sitting at his desk through a window.
My heart instantly caught in my throat at the site of him bent over his work. He wasn’t wearing the usual lab coat. It ma
de it that much easier to see the rippling tight muscles under his white shirt and tie.
It was a sexy contrast to the slicked back black hair. My fingers instinctively itched to run my fingers through it. I took a few steading breaths however.
Reminding myself for at least the millionth time that day that to him I was nothing more then a patient. There was no way he knew who I was or what connection I had to him. This was just a visit to give me test results.
My stomach turned again with the reminder. I prayed that this meeting didn’t mean bad news. In all honesty I really didn't know what bad test results would mean. All I had known was once a year I had to go to the doctor and then was told everything was all good. What was the process when it apparently wasn’t all good?
The nurse knocked on the door and from the view in the window I saw Barrett get out of his chair and make his way over to let us in.
I froze in panic. My mind was screaming that I should just turn and run. It was a stupid idea to think I could see this man again knowing full well who he was, and not give myself away.
I took one step back preparing to run like a mad woman out of the office. I would just find a new Gynecologist and never think of Dr. Barrett Harris again.
Before I could make it past my one step, however, the door opened and Barrett’s dark eyes fell immediately on me. In that instant I knew it was too late, he had already drawn me in to him again.
Nine
Barrett
“Thank you, Helen,” I said by way of excusing her.
I wanted to have Lilly alone in my office.
“Mrs. Walters, please come in and have a seat,” I said motioning for Lilly to follow me.
I knew she wasn’t a Mrs. but I wanted to see if she would tell me so. Helen hesitated at the door. It wasn’t normal for me to be alone with patients but since we were in my office and not a examination room it was completely appropriate. Even still Helen seemed to hover wondering if she should still be present.
I didn’t wait for her to make up her mind or even respond. Ushering Lilly in, I shut the door tightly behind her and on Helen’s face.
“Please have a seat,” I said again motioning for the one on the other side of my desk.
I was trying to be as professional as possible, but already the desire to touch her again was palpable in my hand.
“It’s just Lilly,” she said as she came to sit across from me.
I took the moment to give her a good look. She seemed just the same as the night eight years ago. I had often wondered as I fantasized over her that I had made her into some perfect creature that didn’t actually exist.
Seeing her sitting now in front of me, I was sure she defiantly did exist and exactly how I had remembered it. Her beautiful curves to her frame and that long thick golden hair was enough to make me want to take her on my desk, no matter who saw it.
I still couldn’t tell, however if she remembered me too. I debated the past few days not telling her who I was. Knowing there might be a child involved, however, had settled that decision for me.
“I have to say something that might sound a little unorthodox,” I finally said sitting back in my own chair.
She looked up at me with those big brown doe eyes. I was almost sure I saw fear.
“We’ve met before,” I said with a wiry smile. “It was years ago. I’m sure you don't remember me….”
“I remember,” she said looking away from me shyly.
My face broke out into a big grin. I couldn’t believe how satisfying it was to know that she had remembered that one encounter as much as I had.
“Did you know right away?” I asked.
“No. It took me a minute. I mean you seemed familiar but it wasn’t until…” her voice trailed off.
I thought back to a few days ago when my hands rubbed over her milky white breast. Had she also come to the realization of who I was at our touch.
“I’m not going to lie, it was probably one of the best nights I ever had,” I said with a wicked smile thinking back on that day eight years ago.
She looked away from me shyly again.
“Are you seeing anyone?” I asked unable to help myself. I had hoped to ease into thing casually but having her here now made me forget all the things I had planned to say.
“No,” she said smiling back at me. It was all together very satisfying to hear.
“Why, do you have an exam coming up?” she added after a beat.
I laughed at the reminder.
“It was a pretty good excuse if I don’t say so myself.”
“I hope you at least passed your tests,” she retorted. “I would hate to think that night was all for nothing.”
“Oh trust me,” I said with a dark hint to my voice, “it wasn’t for nothing to me.”
“Me neither,” she said softly. Then she cleared her throat and shifted in her seat, “But I’m here for test results, Dr. Harris.”
She seemed to want to get back on track with the reason for her visit. She had no idea that I had just called her here to see her again.
“They are fine, actually. And please, call me Barrett.”
“Fine? Then why did I come in,” she seemed relieved to hear the news.
I felt a little stab of guilt for omitting that fact to get her to my office. I hoped I didn't make her worry to much over it.
“I just wanted to see you again. I thought maybe we could go out for drinks or something. Reminisce about old times.”
“I don’t know what reminiscing we could do, it was just one night,” she retorted.
“I could think of a couple different ways,” I said with a wicked gleam in my eyes.
“Doesn’t that go against doctor patient privileges or something?”
I could tell she wasn’t being serious.
“I wouldn’t know. I’ve never asked a patient out before.”
“No?"
I shook my head to confirm the fact.
“I would have to say in my line of work, not many want to go out with their doctor after an exam.”
“But you think I will?” she retorted again.
“Well, we do have a history.”
“I guess we do.”
“So?”
I couldn’t believe how nervous I was waiting for her answer. I didn’t date much but when I did go to bars I rarely heard no. Even if I did, it didn’t bother me much. For the first time, I was really invested in the words that were about to come out of her mouth.
“Okay,” she finally said.
“Tonight then?”
She seemed to think this over. I wondered if she was going to mention her kid. Maybe even just the fact that short notice might be hard with a child back at home. She didn’t though.
“We could go to that club again,” I said trying to encourage her.
“Its no longer there,” she responded. “But tonight should be okay. Maybe somewhere that doesn’t have private rooms though.”
“It’s probably best,” I said sitting back in my chair satisfied with her teasing answer. I knew I wouldn't be able to control myself again if the opportunity arose.
Ten
Lilly
I tried my best to hide the smile on my face before re-entering the waiting room. Apparently it was to no avail as Emma’s face lit up when she saw me.
“I wondered what was keeping you so long,” Emma hissed as I met her and we left together.
“What do you mean? It wasn’t that long,” I replied as we made our way down the hall.
“Oh please you were in there like a half hour, I figured you were either going to come out and tell me you’re dying or that you finally got some action. Glad to see it was the latter.”
“I didn’t!”
“Then why does your face look like that?” Emma accused.
“Barrett…”
“Ohh Barrett…”
“Barrett,” I said again more firmly, “only called me in because he remembered me. The test was fine.”
&nbs
p; “And then you picked up right where you left off by making sweet love on his desk?”
“No! I don’t know what you mean picked up anyway. It was one night, not like we had an actual relationship.”
“Just a kid,” Emma added.
I shushed her immediately. It didn't matter that we were out of the building and in the parking lot. I couldn’t risk anyone knowing that. At least not until I figured out what I was going to do about it.
“Hey, up until this week I knew nothing about this guy. Not even his name! I’m not going to tell a practical stranger that he is the father of my kid. As of right now Aria’s father was basically a sperm donor.”
“What and you are going to keep telling Aria that her dad was some Navy Seal killed before she was born? She is getting old enough now that it’s not going to cut it. Better to have a real father no matter who he turned out to be.”
“The point is moot,” I said waving my hands.
“So you’re just going to go on with your life like you didn’t just find your baby’s daddy?”
“Kinda,” I replied with a wrinkle to my nose.
Emma turned in the passage seat and looked me up and down. She was trying to determine what that exactly meant.
I rolled my eyes when I saw she wouldn’t drop the matter till I told her.
“Barrett asked me out to drinks with him tonight?”
Emma’s face lit up like a Christmas tree.
“I knew it! So now what?”
“Now I am going to go pick up Aria, figure out what the hell I’m going to wear.”
“Oh, something hot for sure,” she said as we pulled out of the parking lot. “Stop at my place first. You don’t have anything that will work.”
“I’m only going for drinks. I just want to get to know him a little. That way when I do have to tell Aria who her father really is, at least I can tell her a little about who he is.”
“Sure, sure. And if you get laid in the process…all the better. But this time maybe use a rubber,” she added in a teasing voice.