by Seoran Worg
Smile creeping in my mouth, I almost mastered this distance, maybe it is time to add few paces. Nowadays, I love to practice shooting arrow, it helps me focus and think more clearly. I also determined to have a martial art skill. So, I won’t be burden to the others when danger comes. I pick another arrow, aiming again and I ready to shot.
“My lady…” Comes Ryn’s voice beside me and it is startled me. And I lost my aim.
“Goodness… You are so quiet like a sha…” I realize how silly I sound.
“…dow,” he finishes it for me.
We smile to each other and for once he doesn’t hold back his smile.
“You’ve got better at arrow, my lady.”
“Thank you. But you must be better than me,” I say morosely.
He raises his eyebrow. I give my bow to him, “Try,” I say, “Don’t hold back,” I warn him.
He smiles again. I think I will never get used to his smile.
He takes aim and pulls the string. True to my prediction, he hits the center of the target easily.
I let out a small defeated sigh.
“Don’t be so sad, my lady. I’ve trained since I was small. Malvin is even better than me.”
I search his eyes and I find the truth there.
“I am just trying to be useful,” I say dejected.
“You are,” he says earnestly.
“You know… unlike you and the others. My gift is invincible… when the enemies come, I want to fight too.”
He gives me an odd look, “Want to kill too?” the he adds softly, “You’ve changed.”
“I am not saying about killing. I just…” I don’t know what more to say.
He smiles, a bitter smile, “But it’s what we do. At war, we kill. Not dancing and summoning rain,” he says coldly.
I don’t like this side of him. But I know it is the part of him, under that solemn and polite facade, there is dark and bitter soul lurking. I am not sure whether I want to be friend with that one.
“Why you are so mean?”
He pauses, then nods and says, “Please forgive me, my lady.”
“Oh, that tones again.”
He just raises his eyebrow and says nothing.
“Forget it. Do you think, we will have a war soon?”
“As I remember, there is –are wars in the north.”
I make an annoyed face, “Not that wars. War for the throne. The Varr’s war”
“We only have one Varr,” he pauses as if he thinks, what he will say next is an absurd thing, “Do you think the prince and princess will fight each other?”
I hate his tone, as if he thinks I am demented.
“I mean another Varr. The late crown prince’s son perhaps.”
With that I get his reaction.
“Late crown prince’s son?”
“It’s what Manz said.”
“And you believe him?”
“Yes, I think he didn’t mean to tell me. That’s way I believe him.”
“There was no son or daughter. If there any, do you think the empress will let him live?”
“Maybe the empress didn’t know yet. Don’t you think it’s possible?”
“You don’t know her as I do, my lady. She won’t let anyone go from her grasp.”
“Like you?”
I see a flicker of emotion in his eyes. Just briefly his eyes’ color change a little.
“Do you want to leave?”
“Don’t you?” he asks me back.
“You’re a gifted one. You can do so much. Why?”
“Do what, my lady? Another killing? I though you hate it.”
I just stand there hurt, he just so mean.
“I see. I am offending your sensibility again. Please forgive me.”
With that he walks away but in few steps he stops and sees me straight in the eyes, “Not everyone fond of that collar, my lady,” the he continues to walk away.
I want to call him back, tell him to stay and ask many questions.
Where are you these days? Why are you seems avoiding me? We are friend, aren’t we?
I raise my hand to the collar in my neck and gingerly touch it. It is cold to the touch and I remember what it can do. What it did to Manz. But he doesn’t have it. Only the empress crown can hold him down, like she did five days ago, but again, that crown is scaring everyone even the prince and the princess, that crown can bind anyone, even the Varr, her own blood. I think Shadows must have different kind of bond. But what it is, I don’t know. I haven’t found it yet in many books I’ve read. I assume it is must be stronger bond than Blessed’s collar. I am sure of it.
***
As I on my way to the throne room, seeing the bright sky outside from the windows, thinking how my live have changed. The days passing by and I feel more trapped day by day. I don’t know when they will permit me to visit my family. They also check all my letters, both the one I send and receive.
I keep train my energy, sometimes with Prince Lex, Princess Larra or Malvin. I don’t know where they send Ryn this time, but he is nowhere near the palace these days, the last time I saw him was a week ago.
Once a week they send me to Varan Castle to learn history and philosophy. I went there shortly after dawn break and back to the palace before dusk that is the only solace I can get these days. As for the martial art, Master Hyun trains me in the palace along with Prince Mex and two of his cousins. I feel smile creeping on my face, remembering those children. They are so full of comrade and seems so ordinary like others child outside this palace. I can imagine the prince and his Shadows as a child. Were they happy too back then?
I arrive at the front door of the throne room. I take a deep breat while majordomo opens the door for me. Today is the day I attend the court, the empress’ commands me to, twice a week. In every session, I hear almost the same reports, losses from the north, pirates in the south and west, and robber in the midland. I know those robbers, at least part of them. Thinking back, maybe Ryn is right, it is unwise to let them flee. And the reaction of the minsters is the same too. They are keep pressing for more troops and demanding the prince to go to the war, and again the empress will refused all their demand in the end.
As I enter the throne room, I know what to expect.
Today will be the same again.
But the report from the north today, bring shiver to my body. Prince Wang of Cryg Confederacy is getting more aggressive, and going cross the Shan River if he is not stopped soon. If that happen it is mean port cities along the rivers will in peril, and those cities are the central of trade. I know the ministers frustration but I also understand the empress fixation with the lost soul. I think she knows about the hidden prince, her great nephew. That is the only explanation. I suspect it is where Ryn now, chasing the rebel, wherever they are.
I hear Lord Jim Dubh loud and clear voice, “The soldiers and peasant need moral support, your majesty. We just need for the crown prince to be there not necessary to join the fight,” he says.
Other ministers support this cause and add some more arguments. Only Lord Max and two other ministers firmly oppose and defend the empress. The bickering starts, the room is getting noisy now.
Prince Larra steps forward from where she stands, behind the ministers among other royals. She walks to the foot of the throne stair, in slow steady steeps. Her thick hair piled high in her head, it add few inches to her height. Seeing her, the ministers stop their squabbling and paid her full attention.
“I will go, your majesty,” Princess Lara offers in calm loud voice. Despite her youth, she looks regal in her maroon colored robe.
Another minister starts to protest, “But the princess is mere girl…” that gets a sharp look from the princess, “Begs your pardon, your highness,” he adds quickly.
“This mere girl had killed more than you will ever be, my lord.”
“Enough!” says the empress, “As you wish, I will send Prince Lex.”
I cannot believe what I just heard
so is the ministers. I see many mouths are hanging open, gapping. They exchange look of disbelieve with each other.
“I will send my son, so off you go,” the empress dismisses the courts.
The Ministers go with their stony face, try to mask their expression well. In small groups, they go out, talking in mumbling voice.
The empress tells one of the court ladies to fetch Malvin, then she dismiss the court ladies too. Only few royals and advisor still stay behind. I don’t know whether I should stay or not. In the end I stay. Honestly, I curious what will happen next.
“This is not wise your majesty. We cannot send the prince. It’s too dangerous, Prince Wang is stronger now, unlike two year ago. I beg you to reconsider,” says Lord Zigo Koell. He is old man, maybe around sixty years of age. He is frail and his hair is snowy white.
The other advisors also beg the empress to reconsider her decision. This war is too dangerous with small chance to win they say.
Princess Larra is still rooted in her place in silent as if in deep thought.
The empress ignores the advisors advice however.
“If you insist, then we should gather all our strength, your majesty. We should call out all clans and march to the north in full force,” adds another advisor.
In the end, the empress says, “No need for that. But don’t worry, my lord,” she smiles sweetly, “The prince will be safe.”
That gets reaction from Princess Larra, “Mother!” she says loudly as if just comes back from her trance. Her eyes round in disbelief.
Malvin comes shortly after. He walks alone, wearing silver clothes with wide sash embroidered with golden dragon. He takes his place near Princess Larra, who stare dagger to her mother.
He bows to the empress.
The empress looks coldly at him, “I will send you to war at the north,” the empress says curtly.
He seems taken aback but he composed himself quickly, “As you command, your majesty,” Malvin answers in calm voice.
“You will be there as a prince not a Shadow. Do behave accordingly,” she pauses for a while, “You may go,” she adds offhandedly.
But before he excuses himself, another come in. She walks in long stride. She is woman in her fifty with long grey hair and heart shaped face. Her others feature is almost symmetrical and she has a Varr look in her. I see a silent rage in her face. She stops in front of the empress. She boldly stares at her without even bowing.
“You wouldn’t dare!” she says in icy voice to the empress.
Who is she? Why is she so bold?
“Please, Mother,” Malvin says in pleading tone.
“If you think I will stay quiet when you send my son to die. You’re sorely mistaken, Niece.”
Niece? She is the empress’ aunt? So this makes Malvin a princess’ son, yet he is a Shadow, a no one.
The Blesseds who guarding the empress step forward to restrain Malvin’s mother, but the empress stops them.
“Go with him then, Aunt Vianna,” the Empress answers nonchalantly, “No one, forbids you to.”
“As your command then, your majesty,” she bows to the empress then stride out.
I see Malvin stricken face but he says nothing so is Princess Larra. But Princess Larra’s eyes say more than a mere word. It is full of anger.
Chapter 9
This morning, I wake up earlier than usual, padding to the window and see the sky above, it shine brightly, not caring about people’s worry down below.
The servant come to help me taking a bath. Soaking in big wooden tub, feeling the warm of rose scanted water. Taking a bath like this is a luxury that I only can get in the palace. I stay floating for a while, and suddenly, I feel the water is already cold. Shivering, I out from the bath and the servant swiftly help me dry my body.
Today, I wear dark green tunic and loose trouser. Before go down to the training room, I have light breakfast in my room but somehow it tasteless in my mouth. I leave it after a few spoon and go down to the training ground. I walk slowing through stairs and corridors, it is quiet inside; servants are busy outside.
I enter the training room but no one is there yet.
I walk to the window, looking at servants and soldiers busily arranging weapons in carts. They are trudging across the yard bringing big boxes.
Tomorrow is the day Malvin and his mother, Princess Vianna, will depart to Manna City, a port city at Shan River in the North. This city has become the army base for the last two years. The empress’ husband, Lord Isa Seth, is already there. I heard from Marie that most people think this is a hopeless war. I know it, for the empress’ advisors think the same too.
The enemy’s army is led by Prince Wang, seasoned warrior that had won many battles in the past. He also has important role in uniting many small kingdoms in the north to one big confederacy, called Cryg Confederacy.
I let out a soft sigh. Both Prince Lex and his sister are in bad temper these days while Malvin seems tries too hard to be cheerful. With Ryn nowhere to be found, it leaves me in awkward position, training among them every day. I wish Ryn is here but somehow I am worried too, that it will be him, the one the empress sends to the war.
I hear footsteps come near. And soon, both Prince Lex and Princess Larra join me. Both of them wear somber colored clothes. Without many words being exchanged, we start our meditation quickly.
Today’s training is to direct my energy equally to both of them. I find that controlling energy is become easier now but Master Yan said the energy flow must be trained daily or else it becomes rusty. We prepare our stance about ten feet apart from each other. After we are ready, I create energy path to both of them and let the energy flow.
From what I decipher from the Hallowed, Lady Zara Dierg, journal, I know that I should be more than this. Lady Zara wrote in her journal that she was always in front line when the battle comes along with at least one of her three partners. I am not sure what bond she had with these three partners. All I know is the three of them is the Hallowed and one was her lover. Reading her memoir, it feels like I read forbidden book. It makes me feel oddly flustered and dream a naughty thing.
Oh, I should forget that silly dream.
I feel my cheek getting warmer by remembering it. And I will it to go.
I hear distant sound, the sound of familiar footsteps, it is light and sure. My heart skips a beat and it breaks my concentration. It seems both Prince Lex and Princess Larra hear it too.
Ryn comes into view shortly after, he wears black colored tunic long to his thigh and trouser in same color. His hair is pulled back, tied in knot, but some of it escapes from its confine, and partially hide his weary face. Dust covers his wrinkled clothes, it seems he ride as fast as possible back to the palace, from wherever he come from.
Ryn kneels in front of the prince, “Please, allow me to go, your highness,” he said in sheer determination.
Go? To the north?
“No,” Prince Lex answer is short and precise. They are staring at each other for a long while.
“Do you think, you will make any different?” the prince breaks the silent.
“You send them to die, then.”
The prince stays silent for a moment.
“So, are you saying, you can win this battle?” Prince Lex voice raised a little.
“I’ll or die trying,” Ryn says stubbornly.
“No,” the prince turns his back from Ryn.
“What is matter even if I die?”
“Do you really think you can protect him? Like you protect her?” Prince Lex shouts and swiftly faces Ryn again.
“Brother!” the princess tries to stop the prince.
“You? The one who can’t even protect his woman?”
Ryn holds the prince hard stares, “And I won’t let anyone die for me again.”
“You! I should just let you die!” the prince eyes filled with rage.
Ryn still hold the prince gaze, “Kill me then,” he says calmly.
Up to
the challenge, he makes a snapping motion with his hand.
I see Ryn’s bracelet grows in his wrist. It is the golden bracelet which I saw so many times before. It transforms, writhing alive and split into three small snakes. The snakes made of golden metal slithering slowly on his body, it has white eyes made of diamond, and green scales made of jade. It slowly coiled around him in deathly grip.
He makes a choked up voice. I see he bite inside his mouth to keep him from cries out loud. His eyes wild but still looks at the prince defiantly. His face is taut, and blood trickles down from the corner of his mouth. But like in the throne room, he keeps stubbornly silent.
So, this is his collar. The one thing that will bind him forever until his last breath.
I see Princess Larra averts her gaze from them, and clenches her fists tightly.
Failing to draw plead of mercy out of Ryn, Prince Lex lets go of his control over him. And slowly the golden snakes stealth back to Ryn’s bracelet.
“If you wish to die so much, then go.” Prince Lex leaves the room, walks away without looking back.
“Why you anger him so?” Princess Larra comes near and crouched down beside him.
Ryn stays silent.
“This is not your war to fight.”
“I am not fighting for the royals, princess.”
“I know,” she whispers.
“The freedom to choose is all I want.”
“And you chose to die,” she says bitterly.
“Princess–”
“Malvin has his mother. She will keep him safe,” she cuts him, “What about you?” she asks in wavered voice.
Ryn tries to stand up and wobbled a little. Princess Larra helps him steady.
“I will be safe,” he gives her a sad smile, “I hear you want to go too, princess. Yet here, you worry about me.”
They stand facing each other. He erases the silent tears in Princess Larra’s checks and takes her in his arm. I can hear she is sobbing now. Seeing the princess behave like this, she looks like a girl in her age, a sixteen years old girl, instead of fierce and fearless warrior.
“I am much bigger and stronger than you. You know that, aren’t you?” he teased her and strokes her hair gently.
“You do want to die,” she says stubbornly between her tears. Then, she breaks free from his arm, marching out angrily following her brother.