by Deanna Chase
Which is why I kept my eye on the orb as it stalked us from the edge of a framed Yazoo River map. “Down, portal,” I told it. The last thing we needed was to go back to hell. Who knew if demons like Vald stayed dead.
The portal darted sideways and hovered by decorative brass steering wheel hanging on the wall, honoring a certain Captain Clebius Barnam. It dipped and swayed, gathering courage. I gave it the stink eye and it zipped backward, clanging into a brass bell.
Grandma’s eyes fluttered among the mass of long, gray hair tangled in her face. “I’m getting too damned old for this.” She pushed her hair back with one shaking hand and braced the other against the wooden wall, slathered in years upon years of white paint.
“Please tell me you know first aid,” I said, stuffing Dimitri’s borrowed lab coat against his chest wound. The switch star had cauterized part of the wound, but he still bled. Way too much. If he was still bleeding, he was still alive, right? The switch star had cut a hole through the left side of his chest. It had to have hit his heart, his lungs.
The coppery scent of blood hung thick in the humid, night air. Dimitri’s skin, drained of color, had gone bluish around his lips. His pulse felt thready, at least it had a few seconds ago. Now? I couldn’t feel it. “His heart’s stopped.”
No, no, no.
“Help!” I screamed at the top of my lungs. Grandma hijacked his wrist while I moved north, thrusting both hands against the artery on his neck. No pulse. “Damn it! Tell me you know CPR or magic or something!”
She shook her head. “I know he’s supposed to die.”
I couldn’t believe it, even though I held the proof in both hands. “What?”
She looked as helpless and mortified and exasperated as I felt. “Back in the Yardsaver Shed. I saw Vald plotting to drag you down into the second layer of hell. Look what happened when I tried to stop that. And later, I saw Dimitri dying to save you.” She sighed. “It was inevitable.” She wiped a spot of blood from his wrist, ignoring the puddle of blood that soaked her jeans from the knees down.
“So he’s…” I couldn’t say it.
“Gone.” She helped me ease his head onto my lap. “I’m sorry, Lizzie. I know what he meant to you.”
She didn’t know jack. Okay, so he lied to me and I was mad at him, but he’d had his reason, a good one. And now he’d never know that I needed him too. He’d shown me that I could be strong. I could break a few rules, wear kick ass black boots and make love until I screamed. And just when I was ready to let go of my past, Vald had stolen my future.
The portal crackled as I sat there with his head in my lap, unable—no, unwilling—to move. I knew we needed to get out of here. We were free from the second layer of hell, but that orb could send us right back to Vald’s laboratory—or somewhere worse.
Maybe there was nothing I could do for Dimitri. But getting up out of the puddle of blood, letting go of him, I’d never get this moment back again. When I stood up, he’d really be gone.
“Lizzie?” Frieda rattled the pilot house door. “Oh snot. It’s stuck. Lizzie?”
“Open the God damned door,” Grandma ordered. “You locked us in with an itchy portal.”
“Gertie? Well I’ll be a buttercup!” Frieda squealed. “Ant Eater! Get yourself over here! Gertie’s back!”
I wanted to smack Frieda for being happy about anything right now. Of course she didn’t know Dimitri lay crumpled and—I forced myself to think it—dead in my lap. I didn’t know how I thought things would end, but it wasn’t supposed to happen like this.
He’d been too alive, too sexy and too stubborn.
“At least he saved his sisters,” Grandma said.
I uncrumpled the bloody lab coat from his chest and spread it over his body. He’d have told me it was worth it. But it wasn’t. Not to me.
“He wanted to make this thing between us work,” I said, running a finger along his strong jaw. “I told him when hell freezes over. Guess we were both wrong.” I grazed my fingers over the lips that had kissed away the marks from the black souls, and touched me in ways, well, in many, many ways. Tears crowded my eyes. He’d taught me a thing or two, about switch stars, myself and, heck, what it felt like to be wanted.
“Motherfucking damn it.”
“Excuse me?” I said, eyeing Grandma’s stormy expression through a squidgy window of tears.
“You’re turning me into a pansy ass,” she said, shoving her hair back from her face with bloody fingers. She puffed up her cheeks and blew out a breath. “We can save him, okay. If we act now. It’s stupid and pointless,” she harrumphed, “and there’s no turning back from it.”
“How?” I asked, hope tickling my stomach. I’d take any chance we could get.
“You’ll be opening yourself to him in ways you can’t imagine.”
“No,” I told her. “I mean how do we do this?”
Grandma frowned before she shoved her hand inside my vest.
“Yow!” Icy fingers. “Some warning first!”
“Like I got time to buy you flowers,” she muttered, her nails scratching the smooth skin under my collar bone. “Damn it!” A sizzle zipped through her and she yanked her hand back. “I was hoping I could touch it. You have to.”
“Fine. What am I looking for?”
I lifted my shirt away and almost choked when I saw it.
“We need to work on your sensing abilities,” Grandma muttered as I stared at the pure white light glowing from inside my chest. I couldn’t feel it, but it was a part of me.
I reached down and touched it, felt it vibrate against my fingers. It hummed steady and strong—my living essence, the thing that Vald wanted so bad, was reaching out to Dimitri.
“You do it and there’s no turning back,” Grandma warned.
Yes, there’d be consequences, but I didn’t care. The only thing that mattered was having Dimitri back, alive.
I forced myself to look as I my fingers crept into the sliver of chest above my heart. Blood pulsed in my ears, against my fingers. The essence clung to me, warm and steady. I took what was mine and slid it into the gaping wound in Dimitri’s chest. I tried not to think of how cold he felt. Grandma muttered a series of incantations as I watched my power sizzle inside him.
Freely given, freely taken.
His chest healed before our eyes, muscles knitting together, skin growing whole. I felt for his pulse. Nothing. My hope sank. But still, I had to believe he could do this. Don’t give up. Please, Dimitri. I did the only thing I could think to do. His head in my hands, I bent down and touched his lips to mine. His lips felt cool. Tears burned my eyes.
He gasped.
Sweet switch stars!
I searched his face. His eyes remained closed, but his chest moved up and down in a beautiful, steady rhythm. I wanted to hug him, Grandma, the portal. He was alive. He saved me and I’d saved him right back.
His emerald glowed hot against my neck.
Kick butt demon slayer that I am, I started crying all over again. “Thanks, Grandma,” I said, running my fingers through his thick hair. I couldn’t help but think back to the first time I’d given in to the temptation, under very different—and quite toe-curling—circumstances.
“It was dumber for him to go down there than it was for you,” Grandma said. “Griffins rule the elements, not the underworld.”
“He cares about his sisters.”
“And you.”
I ran my fingers along his broad shoulders. The idea made me smile. I didn’t know he was awake until he broke open a weak, but saucy grin of his own. I kissed it right off him. “How do you feel?”
“You don’t want to know.” He cupped the back of my head and dragged me down for another kiss. His lips were solid, eager and insistent. I ignored the blood that clung to him and focused on him, clean earthy and masculine. Pure delight threaded through me as he nuzzled his cheek against mine.
“I thought I was dead,” he murmured.
“You were,” Grandma said.
>
“Grazed by a switch star,” I said, nipping at his delicious lips. “You’ll live.”
Grandma cleared her throat. I didn’t know if she disapproved of the public affection or the lie. Frankly, I didn’t care. I’d been through enough in the past twenty four hours that I should be able to kiss this man for a week. In front of a room full of grandmas. And the Pope.
And if she questioned my little white lie, well, I had to do it. If he knew we were somehow connected, he might never let me go. He’d touched me in ways I never knew existed, but I didn’t belong in this world any more than he belonged in mine.
But I would take one more kiss.
***
There were at least a dozen witches and one elated terrier ready to tackle us the minute we walked out of the pilot house. Pirate dashed for me, his nails skidding on the wooden deck.
“Lizzie! You’re here! I didn’t know if I’d see you again and I was counting the seconds you were gone. But you know I can only count to four. So I had to count one, two, three, four,” He squirmed like a puppy when I picked him up. “And then one, and two and,” he said, between licks to my hands, face and wherever else he could reach.
“Ease up, buddy. I’m here,” I told him, trying to keep hold of my dog in one hand while my other wrapped around Dimitri’s waist. He looked terrible with the bloody lab coat hanging from his frame. But he felt good. And call it wishful thinking, but I could have sworn he grew steadier with each passing minute. I didn’t think my nuzzle therapy had hurt, either. Well, except that we had to wait a few minutes before Dimitri wanted to stand up.
“Sorry it took a bit,” Frieda patted Dimitri’s arm, her bracelets clanging together. “We locked the portal here in the pilot house so it wouldn’t get away again. It likes to ring the bell.”
“It’s not alive,” I told her.
“Okay,” she said.
“Step aside!” Sidecar Bob pushed his way through the crowd around us, medical bag balanced between his knees. “I need to get a look at him,” he said, nearly running over my toes. “What happened?”
“Grazed by a switch star,” I said, yanking my foot back as he spun his wheels sideways for a better look.
“Lizzie! You didn’t!”
Thanks for reminding me about my aim.
“No. I didn’t,” I said. Which just goes to prove, first impressions die hard.
Witches crowded the main deck. I accepted some congratulations, and a horny toad from Redneck Sue. (I didn’t ask). The riverboat’s ancient sound system blasted AC/DC’s “Highway to Hell” as Pirate and I wandered up to the narrow deck at the front of the boat. Let Grandma have her fun. I wasn’t much for loud parties. Besides, it would be hard enough to say goodbye to this life without teasing myself with the revelry outside the pilot’s house. Hopefully, Frieda had remembered to lock the door on that portal.
“Watch yourself,” I told Pirate as I crushed a Mexican Food Craving Spell near his tail. Lord knew what that would do to my dog.
I watched the dust from the spell flutter toward the wooden deck. It would be tough to leave this place, but I’d never made any bones about the real reason I wanted to learn about my powers. I loved my job at Happy Hands. Heck, I wanted kids of my own someday. And while running around with biker witches and griffins had done a lot for my confidence and my love life, this wasn’t the place to have a family.
Case in point, as Grandma lumbered up to me with two hands full of steak knives. “For the Beast Feast after the ceremony.” She dropped them onto the bench behind me and ignored the ones that missed and clattered to the deck.
“What ceremony?”
“The one for you.” She dug her finger into her right ear. “Dang thing’s been buzzing ever since, well, I guess I don’t have anything to bitch about, do I?”
“Need help getting ready?” Perhaps I could keep the squirrel guts out of the ceremonial goblet.
“Nah. It’s a job for the coven. I gotta round them up before they tap the keg.” She cast a wry grin my way and hitched up her belt. “I’m not good at this, so shut up and listen. I was blown away by how you handled yourself down there. Don’t get me wrong, I always knew you could do it. You’re my grandbaby for God’s sake. Anyhow, I’m proud. And your mother would be too.”
“About my mom,” I said, one eye on Pirate, who sniffed at the knives.
“Scarlet told me. I should have warned you except, damn it, I thought I’d start with the life-saving shocks and work our way down to the life-changing ones. I thought we had time.” Her expression grew serious. “I saw Vald’s plan for you while I was meditating in the Yardsaver shed back at the Red Skull bar. Unfortunately Vald also saw me.”
“It’s okay,” I told her. “I just wish…” What? That my mom cared about me? That she’d been brave or strong or maybe that she’d warned me before she shoved her powers off onto me? “I don’t have a twin, do I?”
She slapped me on the back. “No.” She dropped her hand. “And I’d suggest you lay off your mom for a while. It took more than you realize for her to come after you, regardless of what you think about her.” She tilted her head and eyed me thoughtfully. “Just know your momma loves you in her own way.”
“Okay.” I’d choose to believe that, for now.
“I meant what I said back at the dumpster. I’m looking forward to being your grandma. Not that I’m going to be throwing chocolate chip cookies at you. Or blowing smoke up your ass.” She dug her hands into the pockets of her rhinestone studded skinny jeans.
“I’m going home,” I told her.
She nodded, watching the full moon. “I told Scarlet what you did, ripping your soul in half. You should have seen the look on her face.” She cleared her throat. “Here’s the thing. She thinks there’s a way to rejoin the two halves.”
I nodded, relieved. Leave it up to Scarlet.
“According to Scarlet, you have a choice. When we rejoin your soul, we can put it back together and leave your demon slaying essence behind.”
“You’re kidding!” I wanted to kiss her. Heck, I’d have been willing to kiss Ant Eater at that moment. Talk about winning the demon slayer lottery. This was even better than learning to control my powers. I could be normal. At last.
“Think about it, Lizzie,” Grandma cautioned. “No more switch stars. No more enchanted river boats. No more throwing Giggle Spells at Ant Eater.”
“No more black souls, death spells, fifth level demon attacks.”
“No more talking dogs. No more griffins,” she said, watching the moon flecked waves slap against the bow of the Dixie Queen.
She would have to mention that.
“Unlike your mom, you won’t have to burden anyone else with your powers. ‘Course you’ll be completely cut off from the magical world.” We stood in silence for a moment. “Except that I’ll be by to visit from time to time. I mean, you are my grandbaby.”
I knew there’d be consequences. I never thought leaving would be easy. Well, maybe I did in the beginning.
While I wasn’t going to run from this world, like my mom, I knew I wasn’t a part of it, like my grandma.
“Let’s do it,” I told her.
“Think about it. No more saving people, making a difference.”
That’s where she didn’t get it. “I make a difference every day when I teach.”
“Good point.” Grandma nodded. “We won’t start the ceremony for another,” she checked her hog watch, “twenty minutes, depending on how fast it takes to steam the armadillo jowls.”
“Of course,” I told her.
I didn’t need twenty minutes to think. I’d already decided a long time ago. I mean, this is what I wanted, right? It was better than what I wanted, which was to be left alone. For good.
So why did I feel so miserable?
***
I’ve never liked goodbyes.
Dimitri leaned against the railing on the back deck, one foot propped up on the rust-flecked metal. He would have to look sexy as all g
et out in worn jeans that hugged his drool-worthy butt and his trademark black T-shirt, drawn tight over his back. Maybe I wasn’t the only one feeling a bit tense.
Witches called to each other among the clanking coming from the kitchen and main dining room. Preparations for the Beast Feast were in full swing. I’d left Pirate in the middle of it, riding in Sidecar Bob’s lap and sampling everything in reach.
Dimitri’s gaze flickered over my dirty purple plaid miniskirt. “Come here, Lizzie.”
I wrapped my arms around him, ear to his chest and reveled in the thwump, tump, tump of his heart. He’d always have a part of me with him, whether he knew it or not. My chipped pink fingernails traced wicked patterns on his abs. “They send you out here too?”
“Nah. I just got off the phone with my sisters.” He burst into a wide grin. “You wouldn’t believe it, they’re—” He trailed off, lost in his pure rapture. His sisters were alive.
Dimitri shook his head, lit up from head to toe. “Diana has this horse,” he said. “She calls it her pony, but don’t be fooled—the thing’s a full-bred Andalusian. Turns out she’s been dreaming of him while she’s in her coma. She wakes up, glad as anything to be alive and decides she has to ride the horse, right then and there. Well, Dyonne—that’s my other sister,” he paused, physically unable to wipe the smile off his face, “Dyonne tells Diana to forget about the horse. There’s a monster storm brewing off the coast. Lightning, pouring rain, the works. Everybody knows she can’t take Zeus out in that. But all Diana can think about is this horse.”
He shook his head. “So Diana’s out there, soaked and Dyonne is hollering at her from the window, mad as hell ‘Get in here or you’re going to get killed—again!’ She thinks she has Diana convinced when Diana comes busting through the front door of the house and rides Zeus straight into the dining room.” He laughed freely, tears touching the corners of his eyes. “God, I love those two.”
He tilted his chin down, still smiling. I was going to melt into a puddle on the floor if he kept looking at me that way.
He wrapped my hands in his. “I’m flying to Santorini in a few hours to see them,” he said. “If the house is still standing—and at this rate, that’s a big if.” He ran his thumbs in lazy circles over my wrists. Such a small gesture, but I didn’t want it to end. “I’d like you to come stay with us.”