by K. J. Dahlen
Dante reached over and grabbed my hand. “That’s good Baby.”
“I also have the hormone levels regarding your pregnancy,” the doctor said. “The numbers are significantly higher than this morning, which indicates that you’re still pregnant and the fetus is growing.”
I looked over and saw tears running down Dante’s face. He exhaled as if he’d been holding his breath for hours.
“I have to be straightforward with you. It doesn’t mean you’re out of the woods yet, but it is a good sign.”
“When will we know?” I asked.
“If you lose the baby, you might know by cramping and spotting. That isn’t always the case. I’m going to order an ultrasound for two weeks from now. By then, the technician will be able to make a much better determination.
“Thank you,” Dante said, shaking the doctor’s hand.
He left the room leaving the nurse standing there. “I take it congratulations are in order?” she said.
“Yeah,” Dante said. Again, there were tears in his eyes. “I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I was just so worried and I knew how much you wanted this,” he said more to me than to her.
“You’re probably overtired,” the nurse said. “You need a good night’s sleep.”
Dante shook his head even before she finished talking. “I’m not going home. I wouldn’t sleep well if I was away from her anyway.”
The nurse had opened a large wooden cabinet along the wall and pulled out a sheet, blanket and a pillow. “Well, if you’re going to be stubborn, then at least get a good night’s sleep here.” The nurse asked Dante to stand and showed him how the chair he was sitting in turned into a single bed. She helped him put the sheet on it and then the blanket. She handed him the pillow. “Now, no fooling around in here,” she teased.
I woke up a few times during the night when the nurses came to check on me, take my temperature and blood pressure. In the morning, I woke to see Dante sleeping in the bed next to me. I loved how he looked, sleeping there.
Later, when I woke, Dante was awake. “Good morning, sleepy head,” he teased me.
His parents arrived a few minutes later, as did mine. His mom brought him a change of clothes and something to eat. My mom brought him something to eat, too. He made a joke about needing the jogging pants again if everyone was going to keep over feeding him.
I was allowed to eat real food, though it had to be the hospital food. It wasn’t too bad. After we both ate breakfast, the nurse had me up and walking around. I thought it would hurt a lot more than it did, though it was still uncomfortable.
The doctor was happy with my progress and told me I’d be going home in the morning.
I was happy to be going home, but a little sad too.
When the doctor left the room, Dante pulled his chair right up against the side of my bed, where he’d been keeping it most of the time. Our parents had left an hour or so earlier so Lina, Marco, and Donnie could visit. They’d gone home when the doctor had come in.
The television was on, muted, as I stared at Dante. How did I tell him what I was feeling?
“I’m really happy that you’re doing well enough to go home, but I have to say that not being with you twenty four hours a day is going to be hard.”
It was such a relief to hear him say that. It was exactly what I was worried about.
“Why are you smiling? You like that I’m going to be miserable without you?” he asked.
I shook my head and giggled. “No, it’s just that I was thinking the same thing. I like going to sleep with you and waking up with you.”
Now it was Dante’s turn to smile. “Babygirl, this is not going to sleep with me and waking up with me. I’ll show you what that’s like once you’re out of here and really all better.”
His words made my stomach tingle.
He took my hand. “I have to be honest Annalisa. I have no idea if I’m going to be good at this or not, the dating thing. I’ve never really dated a woman in the way people date. I mean, I’ve...uh…”
“Fucked a lot of women,” I supplied.
“Yeah,” he said, somehow looking embarrassed about it. “But I’ve never done the dinner beforehand or the flowers or, well, any of it.”
That pit that grows in your stomach when you’re about to hear bad news, when you’re waiting for the “but” began to grow in mine. What was he trying to say?
“I guess what I’m saying,” he continued, “is that I’m new at all of this, so I’ll probably fuck up. I’ll buy you the wrong flowers, or, I don’t know. I’ve never actually spent the whole night with a woman before, so I probably won’t be as polished as the guys you usually date.”
I stared at him with my mouth slightly open. Was he being insecure and vulnerable with me? It was so out of character for him, and adorable, and slightly inaccurate. I mean, I had no clue what he’d be like dating, but I also had never dated before. “Dante? Uh, don’t you remember taking my virginity?”
He smiled and nodded. “So fucking tight I thought I was going to die.”
“So clearly, I haven’t slept with a guy all night either and I’ve only been on like five dates in my life. None of them were real. My father...well let’s just say, he’s a bit overprotective.”
Dante chuckled. “Just a bit.”
It was nice we could talk about our feelings. He sat close to me and we held hands while watching a movie on TV. Dante kept complaining that all the good parts had been cut out.
I don’t remember falling asleep, but I remember feeling content.
In the morning, the doctor was in and I found myself being released. Dante walked next to me as the nurse wheeled me to the door and stood there as my father went to pull the car around. He leaned down awkwardly and kissed my lips. “You have my number,” he said, a sound in his voice I couldn’t place. “Call me and text me if anything is wrong. I can be at your house in less than fifteen minutes.”
I nodded.
“Or call or text if nothing’s wrong too, okay?”
Again, I nodded. I couldn’t talk. I knew if I did, I’d start to cry.
My father’s car came around the corner and before I knew it, I’d been loaded into the backseat. I didn’t look behind me as my father drove off leaving Dante standing on the sidewalk in front of the hospital.
Silent tears fell down my cheeks and my parents didn’t notice for blocks. When my father looked in the mirror, his eyes went wide. “Is the ride hurting you Annalisa? I can drive slower. I’m trying to get you home.”
“I’m fine Dad,” I said. It was a half-truth. I was fine physically and I would be fine emotionally. I knew Dante wasn’t gone forever.
I resisted the urge to dig my phone out of my bag and text him that I missed him. I didn’t want to be one of those clingy girls. When we got home, my parents helped me into the bed in the makeshift room they’d created on the first floor.
My mom tucked me in and made a fuss over me. “So you can have anything to eat now. What do you want?”
“Just soup,” I said.
She sat down next to me. “Wanna tell me what’s wrong?” she asked.
I was about to say nothing, but I saw her eyes. So caring and understanding. “I miss him,” I admitted.
She smiled softly. “So call him. Text him. Let him know. I have a feeling he’s missing you too. Where’s your phone?”
“It’s in my bag,” I said. The police had returned it earlier in the morning saying they’d cloned it. Dante hadn’t liked it, but they said it was evidence. I’d told him that there wasn’t anything on it anyway that would be incriminating.
My mom reached into my bag and handed me my phone.
I was surprised to see that I had several text messages. Two were from Lina. She and Marco were at her apartment. She said to call her later after I was settled in at home. There were three from Dante. I bit my lip as I clicked on them. They were:
Miss you.
Hope you’re home safe.
&nb
sp; I was wondering if you’d go on a date with me. Can I pick you up around six?
There had been a space between each. I had to giggle at his last text. I really couldn’t go anywhere. I mean, the car ride had been a bit painful, but the doctor did say that the more I moved, the less it would hurt.
I couldn’t hold in the smile as I texted him back. “I’d love to go on a date. I’m not sure where I can go though.”
“How about a picnic in your yard?”
It sounded so romantic.
“I take it, it’s good news?”
I jumped. I’d forgotten my mom was standing in my room. “Uh, yeah. Dante wants to take me on a date.”
She frowned. “A date? Honey, you’ve just gotten out of the hospital.”
“Just a picnic in the back yard,” I said.
“That sounds very romantic. I’ll let your father know so he doesn’t accidentally shoot Dante.”
I let out a small laugh, but part of me knew she wasn’t kidding. Now that the drama part was over and I was out of the woods medically, would my father and Dante be able to get along? I mean, my father had kidnapped and planned to kill Dante less than a month ago, and Dante had been trying to rob my father. That didn’t really make for a good start to a relationship.
I thought that six o’clock would take forever to come, but I guess exhaustion had gotten the better of me, because I took a four hour nap. When I woke, Lina was standing in my makeshift room with a pile of clothes.
“I raided your closet. What are you going to wear on your date?”
“How did you know I had a date?” I asked, still waking up.
“Oh, well Marco told me. I mean, we were in bed together when Dante texted.”
“Dante texted Marco?” I asked with surprise. “Why?”
“He wanted to ask you out, but he knew you couldn’t really go anywhere. He wanted to have a picnic in the yard but wanted to make sure he didn’t get shot coming over or something.”
I laughed. “My mom said the same thing.”
Lina spent the next hour helping me get ready. I couldn’t wear anything really sexy because I had to wear my running shoes. It was hard enough to walk as it was. Lina was finishing my makeup when I heard the doorbell. My tummy swarmed with a thousand butterflies. I could hear my father’s voice. I moved to the opening of my makeshift room and peeked into the living room.
Dante and my dad were standing in the foyer.
“So this is really happening?” my father asked in a deadpan voice.
“Yes, Sir, it is.”
“This is the part where I’d tell you that if you try anything with Annalisa, I cut off your balls, or if you hurt her, I’ll come after you and they won’t even find the pieces, but since you’ve somehow managed to get my daughter pregnant and shot all before taking her on a first date.”
“Dante, it’s wonderful to see you again,” my mom said coming into the room from the kitchen. “I know that your invitation for a picnic made Annalisa’s day.” I wasn’t sure who she was talking to, Dante or my dad, because it was my dad who responded.
“Ok, I get it, just treat her with the respect she deserves,” he said.
I stepped out into the room a bit more. Dante turned to me and smiled. “God you look beautiful,” he said walking up to me.
He had a big basket that he carried into the yard. He spread out a blanket and we sat on it. He’d brought sparkling cider, fruit and cheeses. We fed each other and held hands. He looked into my eyes and we talked about everything.
Before I knew it, the sky was completely dark and the stars were out. The moon was large, nearly full. We stared up at the sky. “It’s so beautiful,” I said.
“It is,” Dante agreed, though he was looking at me.
I giggled nervously at his compliment.
“I’m loving this date, but I think we should get you back inside. I want to make sure you get rest.”
I didn’t want the date to end, but I was tired. I agreed and he walked me to the door. Standing on our back porch, he pulled me into a hug. I put my arms around his neck.
“Babygirl. I had the best time tonight. I want to take you out again. Here, anywhere...would you like to go?”
“I really would. This was so fun.”
He leaned down and brushed his lips gently against mine.
I could feel the warmth of his breath as we kissed.
“I love you,” he said, standing up straight again. “I’ve got to go. You need rest.”
I was nearly floating as I went back into the house. I knew it would be hard to sleep without him. I’d been so used to it, but I was also tired.
My mom helped me into bed and I lay there thinking about how wonderful my first date with Dante had been. My lips still tingled from where he’d kissed me. I was reading a book when my phone buzzed with a text.
“So, I looked it up online and saw that you’re not supposed to text for two days after a first date. But I also saw online that you’re supposed to tell the woman carrying your baby often how special she is to you. When I did the math and averaged it out, I came up with waiting 45 minutes. I hope this is all right.”
I was still reading his first text when the next came through. “I had a wonderful time Annalisa. Thank you for agreeing to another date. I miss you already. I hope you’re sleeping though. I’ll message in the morning. Good night.”
I nearly squealed when it came through. I texted back. “I had an amazing time too. I am about to go to sleep. I’ll message you in the morning too. Good night.”
It was easier to fall asleep then, and he did message in the morning, and every morning and night for the next week. He came over every afternoon to sit with me or evening to have a picnic.
On Saturday, he came over and wanted to take me on a real date. “It will just be dinner and home. I won’t have her out long, and it’s a safe place,” Dante said to my parents.
“What sort of place?” my father asked. “Is it your club?”
Dante’s face turned red. “No...I was going to take her to Annalisa’s.”
My mother smiled, but my father didn’t look convinced. “Donnie is going with you,” he said.
“On my date!” I exclaimed. “Dad! What do you think is going to happen?”
“You could get shot!” he said loudly. “Do you know what it’s like to wake up in the middle of the night and get a phone call from your right hand man telling you that your only child has been shot! Do you think I want to do that again?”
“We can stay here,” Dante said looking defeated.
“No, no you can’t,” my mom said. She turned to my dad. “She’s got to live her life.”
My dad grumbled something and she whispered, “Go, but be careful, please.”
Dante had an amazing car. I knew it was powerful, but instead of flooring it, he drove so slowly to the restaurant I swore an old lady in a walker would pass us. When we got to Annalisa’s he parked the car and ran around to open my door. He helped me out of the car.
When we walked into the restaurant, I swore everyone stopped talking and was staring at us.
Dante leaned down and whispered, “And your father was worried about you getting shot?”
It was true, he was in theory, in far more danger, but since he was with me, he was safe. I’m sure it would have been the same had he taken me to his club.
We had a great dinner, in spite of the people watching us. As promised, Dante took me right back home, only we didn’t go in right away. He turned to me and took my chin in his hand. We kissed for nearly half an hour in his car. When he’d walked me to the door, I felt weak. It wasn’t from going out, it was from the things he could do with his mouth.
We went out nearly every night after that. He took me to a few restaurants, the movies, and even a concert in the park. When we didn’t go out, we stayed in and had a picnic. Our picnics had gotten more and more physical as the week had progressed, and they had morphed from picnics to make out sessions. All we ever did was kis
s though.
About two weeks after I’d been shot he was over, hanging out with Marco, Lina and I in my room playing a card game. It was my last night sleeping in my makeshift room. I was able to walk the stairs and I’d get to sleep in my own bed. I missed my room and the privacy it offered. Every time my parents walked past, I felt like I was in a zoo since there was no real door.
When it started to get late, Marco and Lina went up to his room. I was more than a bit jealous that the two of them got to make love all the time. I loved kissing Dante, but after having been in his arms, feeling him as he made love to me, made me want it again.
As I walked Dante to the door, my mom stopped him. “Dante, if you’re not busy tomorrow afternoon, around three, I’d like to invite you to Sunday dinner. We’re having stuffed shells.”
“I’d love to come,” Dante said. He turned to me. “See you tomorrow Babygirl.” He leaned down and gave me a soft kiss on my lips.
I was floating as I walked up the stairs to my room to get another book. Dante always left early so I could get rest, but no one could sleep that much. He’d been overly concerned about my health, though we never spoke of the baby. My appointment for the ultrasound was the following Monday. I think neither of us wanted to talk about it until we knew for sure.
As I reached my bedroom, I could hear Lina and Marco in his room. They were having sex, and clearly, they were both loving it. Lina was screaming out Marco’s name and he was grunting something I couldn’t understand.
It had been so long since I’d had sex. I wondered how I could have gone my whole life without it, and then after having it every day for two weeks, not having it at all was torture. I wondered how Marco was handling it. He’d been having sex daily for years. This must be torture. He hadn’t even asked for it.
I was surprised he’d never tried for more since I’d come home from the hospital. How was he doing it? It hit me like a ton of bricks. He wasn’t. A guy like him wasn’t being celibate, he just wasn’t having sex with me. He and I had never actually talked about being monogamous. We had been ready to run away together, but that was for our protection, so we wouldn’t be killed. We’d never said anything about only dating each other. Was that what he was doing? Dating other women? No, he wasn’t dating them, but was he fucking them?