“No.” Simple. Quiet.
“Why?” This was one of the reasons why they’d come to this hell hole.
He wanted to be angry with her. He wasn’t so sure she hadn’t drained his emotions on top of waking him from his dream. But a part of him had always known he’d end up like this. Chained and tortured. Fitting justice for what he’d done in his life. Not that he’d confess this to a Dark. No. Sometimes it was best to keep the worst parts of oneself where they belong. Inside.
The brush of a warm, wet cloth across his chest made him hiss. So, that’s what she’d been doing, warming the water enough to dip in her makeshift washcloth.
“I’ll try to be gentle. I want to wash some of the wounds,” she told him as she ministered to raw spots.
What the hell had Cazacul done? Filleted him? Memory, sharp, flashed into his head—the hot cut of the knife and pierce of teeth. He hoped she had triple-antibiotic ointment.
He needed a distraction. “You owe me an answer.” He didn’t really expect one. Xander wasn’t in the position to demand jack; least of all, answers from this thoroughly frustrating woman who insisted on staying here instead of going to safety. He should be blaming her. What he wanted to do was protect her. He was doing a bang-up job of that, lying here chained and helpless.
The question he should ask himself and not Mina was Why? To put himself at risk for her? She didn’t deserve it. But his heart, that beast of an organ where strange emotions seemed to lay in wait to devour him, said otherwise.
Again, she surprised him. “Sometimes…” her voice wobbled.
Xander jerked his arms, and the chains clanked, reminding him of his inability to do shit. Her fingers splayed across his chest, and he quieted.
Mina cleared her throat and began again. “Sometimes, the answers don’t matter when the questions hurt someone else.”
Her voice was thick with tears. He hated when she cried. The urge to comfort overrode his common sense.
“Mina—”
“Shhh, please.” Her finger stopped him from speaking. “Let’s not pretend anymore. You’re here because I insisted on coming. I knew the answers were important. But…” She sniffed, and her body trembled. The fine tremors traveled through his body from her where she pressed against his side, a living tuning fork. “I didn’t think…” Here she gave a soft hiccup. “…which I don’t do enough. I didn’t think my father would be so angry.”
“You’re right. You didn’t think.” Xander wasn’t going to let her escape this, and the fine shivers increased. “But, it was my choice to follow you. Not all of it is on you.” No, it was his fault, too. They both fucked up on a major scale. All they needed was a neon sign blinking “Idiots.”
“I’m going to make it right,” Mina promised, curling next to him. “I’m going to figure out a way. Until then…” Her fingers stroked his cheek. “…I’m not leaving you.”
“You can’t always follow where they take me,” Xander said with a sigh. Fatigue rolled over him like a blanket, slow and steady. He forced his eyes open. He didn’t need to sleep. To dream.
“Watch me.”
“That’s what got me here.” He surprised himself with the teasing note in his voice. He was rewarded with a slight huff of laughter.
“Go back to sleep. They’ll come back for you soon. I’m watching over you. The dream won’t come back. I promise.”
She tucked her head under his chin. She murmured something in Latin, a Mage spell. Warmth rolled over him, thick, easing tense muscles. He tried to push it off. He needed to plan, but with the magic came the soft beckoning illusion of sleep. Before he formed another thought, consciousness slipped away, and sleep took him with unapologetic gentleness. He welcomed it, because when he woke there wouldn’t be any gentleness.
Chapter Fifteen
“WHO IS GOING TO FIND US?” Nicki’s shoulders tightened, and her thigh muscles ached with the need to move and stretch. She wanted to do something, anything. Going to the firing range usually cured this, but it was late and the area under a state of emergency with a curfew in place. No relief there. Her eyes slid to the overbearing presence of Lev. He’d moved to stand near Rachel, but he didn’t touch her.
Smart man.
“The humans, government.” Rachel ran a hand through her hair, making strands stick on end reminiscent of the eighties big-hair era. This was the perfect time to take a picture for future friend extortion. “We’ve got to get out of here.” Her eyes were dilated, the blue of her iris eclipsed by the black of the pupil.
“Rae…” Nicki reached out a hand, and a sharp move from Lev stopped her.
“She’s not awake.” His voice was a low and harsh. “Her natural clairvoyance is at its peak in this state.”
“This is your fault.” Nicki believed in giving credit—in this case blame—where it belonged. “You gave her that tincture crap.”
“Be silent.” He ignored her accusations. Bastard. “You talk more than Mina does.”
Nicki opened her mouth. How dare he? So what if she talked a lot! Better than suffering in silence. She never understood those women who endured. Fuck that. She shut her mouth and swallowed her nasty retort as Rachel stood up, moving her head around, not focusing on any one thing.
“They search. They’ll find us.” She picked up a pillow. “We need to hide behind the storms.” Rachel hugged the pillow to her. Her head kept swiveling back and forth; she paused in front of Lev, holding up a hand as if she were calling him to a halt. “No, no…you are too bright. They can see you. Your teeth.” Now the girl was channeling Mina.
He held himself in perfect stillness. His fathomless eyes tracked the erratic movements of Rachel with no sense of derision or curl of a lip indicating discomfort or disgust. His expression and his loose stance showed Nicki something softer—compassion? She immediately dismissed the thought. This Dark was a self-serving jerk. He practically forced her to get Rachel here.
Yeah. Because Mina told him to bring the books to her.
Hypocrite, thy name is Nicki.
Nicki swallowed the urge to shout, to shake her friend until she awoke. Instead, she watched as Rachel gathered strange things. A pen, the remote, and a bottle of cinnamon air freshener. What the hell? Was she combating bad odors and chronic channel changers?
“What are you doing?” Nicki couldn’t help the question. She ignored the glare from the overbearing Dark.
Those strange dilated eyes turned to her.
“I’m going to redirect the machines. Charms.” Rachel’s eyes rolled into the back of her head. For a moment, all Nicki saw were the white of sclera, one of the creepiest things she’d ever seen and hoped never to see again. Rachel’s knees buckled in a swoon any southern woman would be proud of. Again, Lev caught the girl in his arms. With little effort, he hefted her up, cradling her next to his chest as if she were a precious item.
“Is she all right? What should we do? Call someone?” Nicki babbled, knowing they couldn’t, even as the words tumbled out of her mouth. She’d seen this before, this strange sleep-walking, but not quite like this. Rae was a zombie. Her heart beat rapidly, thudding as if she’d run up the stairs at work. This was not normal. What was she going to say to Rachel’s mother? “Sorry, I broke your daughter…”
Lev murmured in a low voice, the depth of his voice a soothing rumble, but with it came something else. Energy rubbed along Nicki’s skin, creating goose bumps and making the hair stand up on her arms. Freaking magic.
“We go where she said we should,” Lev told Nicki. He paused in his low chant. “Behind the storms, we go to the Elemental, Petrov.”
Nicki was glad he knew what Rachel meant by the obscure “behind the storms” crap, but she didn’t want to go there. Sure, she’d get to see her best friend, Laurie, and her hot guy, but she felt weird about it. A Mage, one of her brethren, tried to kill both of them, and she felt sort of responsible. The light dimmed as if fog filled the room, deepening it to dusk.
“Shadows.” Nicki too
k in deep gulping breaths as the light continued to fade. She blinked. No. She couldn’t. “I’m not traveling through the shadows with you.” Sure, her voice had a high pitch to it. Whose wouldn’t? She needed to get out of here. The last time she traveled in this realm was after Mikhail Petrov had been shot. She’d barely tolerated it then. “I can’t…”
Around her was the twilight world of mist and darkness. Nicki tried to control the pressure beginning in the pit of her stomach, but it exploded outward, invading her limbs, her head…her everything.
Her chest tightened as if iron bands squeezed around her ribcage. She gulped in air, like drinking water and she was a sieve. Nothing filled her. No air squeezed in. Spots danced before her, and sweat pooled under her arms.
Heart attack?
It was too dark here. So silent in this weird place between spaces.
She needed light. Sound.
Was she dying?
Someone was talking to her. It was muffled. She needed to escape. The spots became bigger as her vision shut down. A random thought drifted through her head as if pulled along by some unseen thread. She was going to be really pissed when she woke up.
Rough hands jerked at her. Something vile was forced into her mouth. It reminded her strongly of sea water and old socks. She batted at the hand, coughing and trying to keep from swallowing, but her head was forced back, her nose pinched, and down it went.
The sudden ease of pressure around her chest was gone. The blackness of her vision cleared. Nicki found herself looking into the raised eyebrow of one half-irritated Dark.
“What are you doing? Trying to poison me?” She spluttered, relieved the intenseness of her fear had lifted and not liking where she sat—on the spongy diaphanous gray whatever this place was made of.
He didn’t move, hovering over her on one knee; the scars on his face made him menacing. He watched her with an intensity she could feel on her skin.
“What are you doing?” More than creeped out, she pushed herself up and away from him.
“Making sure your breathing is regular.” Lev let her go. He stood, returning to the prone figure of Rachel, scooping her up into his arms. “You should’ve told me you were afraid of the dark.”
“I didn’t know.” She’d never been afraid of it before. Nicki rubbed her hand over her face. Now she had something else to worry about.
“I’d be damn sure to get it under control. You’re an easy mark with it,” Lev told her as he walked ahead, not waiting for her to follow. She trailed after him, because what else was she going to do?
Over his shoulder, a bright spot against the black leather of his jacket was the large green bag Rachel always carried. Her panic attacks were dangerous. Nicki understood this, but this man carrying her friend’s purse was deadly. Even she wouldn’t mess with it.
What had she ever done to deserve this? Pulled into the world of magic and politics where any weakness could get her killed. She knew the answer: she’d been born.
“Was it wise to drain Voda?” Laurie couldn’t shake the unease. Her voice was light, but her emotions weren’t. “I know it’s necessary…but he looked so beaten.”
The man shuffled as he walked, shoulders slumped as he docilely followed an Elemental to where he was being quartered. It made Laurie question herself and what she’d become.
“This is business, little Laurie.” Mikhail shifted through the papers on his new desk, a metal and glass contraption she knew he didn’t care for. He glanced up at her as he put them in a folder and put them aside. “This is expected. The boy he used doesn’t feel the same way. Why are you so worried?”
“I keep hoping we won’t go to war. We won’t have to fight.” She fingered the scars on her face again, something she couldn’t seem to stop herself from doing. “But it seems no matter what we do, that’s what’s going happen.” Her earlier fierceness had fled leaving behind a hollowness filled with uncertainty.
Mikhail stood, pushing back his chair to walk to the bar next to the sofa she sat on. The new house was large, but the space was different. The sitting room in the old mansion held the bar; this time he wanted it in his office. He took down a shot glass and reached for the bottle of Russian Standard. For a moment, Laurie assumed he wasn’t going to answer, but as he poured his vodka, he did.
“You have lived a good life. A soft one. For this I am grateful.” He raised his drink in toast to her before downing the contents of the glass in one smooth move. “You haven’t had to deal with some of the uglier sides of this world.”
She couldn’t help narrowing her eyes at him as anger burned along her nerve endings. Soft? She didn’t think her life was soft—ostracized by family, running off most of her friends. As quickly as her anger erupted, like the flare of a fire-cracker, it dissipated. If she were honest, her life was easy. In comparison, his world was a nightmare. She’d at least managed to carve out a life for herself before he found her.
As if reading her thoughts, Mikhail spoke as he poured another shot, but didn’t drink it. “Yes, I took you from that life you thought was perfect, but we’ve gone over this. It was me or someone else. And now you are more powerful.” Reassurance wasn’t in his words, but in the bond. To him, she was invincible, and he adored it.
“That’s debatable.” As if on cue, the energy within roiled, and she couldn’t shake the sense of bloat as she shifted on the couch, feeding the extra energy into the atmosphere. His flare of irritation was immediate.
“I don’t understand this lack of confidence. Act like an Elemental, not like a slave.” Mikhail didn’t soften his words with humor. He meant them.
“You can be a real ass sometimes,” Laurie shot back. He was a pragmatic sort, and sympathy was not in his nature. Sometimes she needed the softer side of him; especially now, when the violence of the world was descending upon them.
“I tell you the truth. If you want lies, go somewhere else.” He lifted one eyebrow, his mercurial Tri-elemental eyes slowly rotating through the spectrum of color. She knew he didn’t understand her irritation at him. She didn’t care.
“Don’t tempt me.” Laurie stood, thinking it was time for her to leave. If she didn’t, she’d end up fighting with Mikhail. Both of them were on edge. This business of housing a Board Mage and sponsoring the negotiations was not sitting well with either of them.
She walked toward where Mikhail leaned on the bar, conscious of his eyes on her. His initial irritation was changing to something more engaging. Her lips curled into a smile. How often had their anger changed to something more physical?
The itching was sudden, crawling up her arms as if she’d fallen into a patch of poison oak. She knew this feeling. The urge to scratch, no, claw at her arms, made her fingers curl. Hissing inward on inspiration, she gave into rubbing her arms with her palms as Mikhail stiffened at her actions.
“Are you expecting anyone?” Mikhail’s words came out clipped and sharp. “Laurie, reinforce the wards. It is a Dark.”
“Wait, I know who this is.” Laurie held up a hand to keep him from giving her more orders. Her reaction was linked to a spell, a strong one. Her elements moved within her, a sweep of power making her gasp as it responded to the magic used. “I’ve just never experienced it so strongly.” It felt like Mina when she visited using the shadows, but there was a difference to it.
“Even a friend needs to come through the front door.” He pulled out a cell phone and pressed a button. Since she gained all of the elements, he relied heavily on technology to alert his security team.
“But this might be Mina…” As soon as she said the name, the emotion from Mikhail was absolute. Anger made her fingers tingle, drowning the itching. But there was anticipation. He wanted the blood-tie broken between them—and so did she.
It had to be Mina. They’d all spent so much time looking for her; of course this was how she’d show up—unexpected and unannounced. Around her, Laurie became conscious of how the room lights dimmed. Their reflections stared back at her in the far gl
ass wall, bathed in the butter-yellow light of the lamps. For the space of a heartbeat, she questioned herself: should she shut the access?
Then they were not alone. The man who walked through the clinging shadows carrying an unconscious woman wasn’t the spikey-haired slender Mina. No. He was tall, broad, and lean, his face scarred. The only thing not scary about him was the lime-green oversized bag he’d slung over his shoulder.
Mikhail swore, low and vicious.
“Since when do you know Mina’s brother?”
“I don’t…” Laurie stopped when another figure stepped out from behind the strange man. Nicki? What is she doing here?
“Yet, you let him in. I am thinking, Laurie, we need to review security measures.” Mikhail’s words dropped like acid, sharp and hot. Evading his outstretched hand, Laurie launched herself toward her friend, pulling her in a tight hug. Nicki was thinner, and the bones of her face were more pronounced, making her brown eyes huge. A wash of shame rolled over Laurie. She’d been so busy dealing with her life, she’d forgotten her friends had their own issues—all because of her.
“Nicki, what’s going on?” Laurie’s eyes slid to Rachel’s unconscious form cradled in the arms of the intimidating younger version of Cazacul. At closer inspection, his features were finer, but his scars roughened him. “What happened to Rachel?” She pulled away from Nicki as Mina’s brother laid her on the rust-colored sofa.
“Here, put that pillow under her head. She looks uncomfortable.” Laurie moved to touch Rachel, but the Dark shifted his body, blocking her.
“Don’t wake her.”
Blinking, Laurie halted. She didn’t expect his voice to be so—melodious. Cazacul had a rich voice, but it was rough like gravel. This one was smooth and lush. He grasped the pillow Nicki handed him from a nearby chair. With careful movements, he placed the pillow under her friend’s head. Laurie tilted her head to one side, realizing they could’ve used the one Rachel clutched to her chest. Why the hell does she have a pillow clutched to her chest?
Illumination Page 17