by Lee, Renee
I looked up at her in surprise and turned toward Thad and hissed, “Your what?”
Dean Sullivan smirked at me and said, “Oh, you didn’t know about this? Why yes. Dr. Reeding says he wishes to resign effective today.”
Thad wouldn’t look at me. Why would he do that? I wished I could ask him.
She continued. “Then, Ms. Elliott, I have here a copy of your grievance, which showed up on my desk yesterday, as well. It was an interesting read, I must say.” I blushed again. I couldn’t look her in the eyes, so I started checking out her own book collection on the shelves beside me.
“And then, I receive reports that you two have been engaged in a sexual relationship from the Director of Human Resources, Gina Denson, and Dr. Kyle Hanover….”
Thad looked up and started to interrupt. “Dean Sullivan.…”
Dean Sullivan held up her hand, cutting him off. “Let me finish, Dr. Reeding.”
Thad turned his head back toward the floor.
“If those things weren’t enough, I heard this morning that Dr. Reeding broke Dr. Hanover’s nose yesterday afternoon.”
I continued to read the book titles. She had a lot of political communication books. Weird.
“You know, as Dean, I’ve seen a lot of things in my day….but I have never had an attempted resignation, an allegation of sexual harassment, an allegation of an improper relationship, and a physical assault all occur within two days and involving the same two people. Not even close. It’s odd, to say the least.”
She turned her desk to the side and appeared to be looking out the window. “So I asked myself early this morning, how can two seemingly professional people be involved in so much craziness? It was then that I remembered……that day at Keno’s when I introduced you…..” She chuckled quietly. “You all could’ve started a fire with those sparks….”
I looked up at her in surprise.
“I may be a stuffy old Dean, but I can tell a smoldering chemistry when I see it,” she smirked at me.
I blushed and returned to looking at the bookshelves.
She paused and pulled her hands together. “Did you ever hear of an English professor here named Dr. Fielding?”
I shook my head, perplexed at where this was going. Thad nodded slowly and replied, “Yes. I’ve heard of him. Great professor from what I heard.”
Dean Sullivan smiled and said softly, “Yes, he was…..He was also my husband.”
I raised my eyebrows and looked at her again. She gave me a sideways glance. “Not all women take their husband’s names, Ms. Elliott.” I wanted to grin, but I bit my lip instead.
Silence again. Where was she going with this? Was she senile? Fifty-something is too young to be going senile, right?
“And then it all made sense. All of it. How can two professionals end up involved in all of this craziness? Love. Love makes you do crazy things….” She looked out the window again. “I recognize the looks you two give each other, you know. I recognize it because Darren and I looked at each other like that for twenty-two years….He’s been gone four years now…..Cancer….” She trailed off, the memories still painful.
Thad finally looked up. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly.
“Thank you. I miss him every day.” She cleared her throat again. “Listen, I don’t condone this mess you all have gotten yourselves into, but I do understand it…..With that said, though, we need to address these issues head-on.”
I saw Thad’s head go back down. I felt brave enough to look toward her instead of the shelves.
“First, Dr. Reeding, I won’t accept your resignation.”
Thad looked up and opened his mouth to argue.
“Let me finish, Dr. Reeding,” Dean Sullivan admonished, more forcefully than last time. He nodded, backing down.
“I’m not going to accept it because it’s a bunch of bullshit.” Thad tensed again, but she continued. “You don’t really want to resign. You’re doing it because you think it’s your only choice in light of all of this. Why don’t you hear me out first, and then, if you still want to resign, I’ll let you.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he mumbled.
“Now, Dr. Reeding, I don’t condone violence at this university. You can’t just go around punching people in a professional environment. Understood?”
Thad nodded. “Understood.”
“Good. As for your punishment, this verbal warning is all you’re going to get. It better not happen again. Now, I can’t stop Dr. Hanover from filing assault charges against you, though I doubt he will after you hear the rest of what I have to say.”
I still didn’t know where this was all going. I glanced over at Thad, who wore a face of bemusement.
Dean Sullivan then turned her attention toward me. “As for you, Ms. Elliott….where should I begin?”
My palms started to sweat. I forced myself to look at her, even though I wanted to melt into the floor.
“You never struck me as the type who needed to throw herself at someone to pass her defense.”
I squirmed in my seat, trying to stop my mouth from blurting a response.
“I heard about the relationship between the two of you from both Kyle Hanover and Gina Denson. Kyle Hanover told me that you also came onto him, Ms. Elliott.”
I started shaking my head forcefully. I couldn’t stop myself. I opened my mouth to speak and she held her hand up again. “Just as I told Dr. Reeding, please let me finish first.”
I slumped back down into my chair.
“Listen, I see how you two look at each other…” She looked at me directly. “Shay, you’re a grown woman….” She turned to Thad. “You’re a grown man….” She moved her head back and forth to both of us. “I don’t believe for one second that either one of you ‘coerced’ the other into a relationship.” Her eyes came back to me. “And I don’t believe for one second that you would’ve thrown yourself at Kyle Hanover when you’re head over heels in love with another man, Ms. Elliott.”
I smiled and bravely looked to her face as she continued. “After reading your complaint and hearing Dr. Hanover’s version of the story, that’s what really bothered me. His story didn’t make any sense in light of what I knew about you and Dr. Reeding. So I did a little investigating early this morning. I looked up the grades he just turned in. His grade distribution wasn’t that odd, but as I looked closer, it was clear that the students in his class getting A’s were overwhelmingly female…..Could be that females were just better students that semester, but I found this pattern repeatedly. Then I printed off a list of the A students with their photographs. Turns out, only pretty girls were getting A’s in his classes. This was worth a follow-up on my part, so I called in a few of those students.”
She shook her head and looked directly at me. “You’re not the only student he’s sexually harassed, Ms. Elliott. He apparently has a pattern of this behavior, trading or blackmailing grades for favors. After questioning, some of these students were clearly traumatized and were willing to put their complaints on the record, as well….” She looked between the two of us. “I don’t think either of you will ever have to worry about Kyle Hanover anymore, nor will any university in the future.”
She looked at me again. “Ms. Elliott, I’m sorry you had to go through that. As Dean, I have the authority to review sexual harassment complaints in the Arts and Sciences…..and I rule in your favor.”
Relief washed over me. She believed me.
“Now, to the matter of Ms. Gina Denson…..” She paused and started tapping her pen on the top of her desk. An awkward silence hovered. “I’m not even sure how to tell you this, actually...” She looked at Thad. “After I spoke with her, I had another strange feeling. She was too invested, too emotional, too forceful, too full of hatred over the situation. I wondered why she cared so much about some grad student and some psychology professor. It just didn’t add up, so I had our computer guys run a check on her computer.”
My eyebrows shot up yet again. She was full of surpris
es today. I didn’t know they could even do that.
“Yes, Ms. Elliott. Your job computers belong to your employer, not you. Employers have every right to see what’s on an office computer any time they wish, so keep that in mind for future reference.”
She turned to Thad. “Dr. Reeding, the computer people found some really disturbing stuff on Ms. Denson’s computer. She was obsessed with you. There were pictures of you all over the place, including photographs taken of you going to the grocery, dry cleaners, etc. She was clearly stalking you.”
Thad bristled and I knew that his anger was rising. “May I please say something, Dean Sullivan?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“I was once engaged to her. That’s why I wouldn’t come here for years. She’s got serious problems. I had no idea that she was stalking me to that level, but it doesn’t really surprise me, either. My biggest fear has been that she’d find out about Shay and go after her.”
Dean Sullivan nodded. “Aha. Well, that makes more sense, I suppose, as to why she was obsessed with you. Hopefully, neither one of you will have to worry about her again, either. The President has been looking for a reason to get rid of her for years due to her instability and unprofessionalism. This was the last straw. He fired her this morning.”
Thad and I were stunned into silence and Thad began to speak. “Dean Sullivan, I….”
Dean Sullivan cut him off again, smiling this time. “Now hold on. I’m not done yet……”
“We have to address one final issue – Ms. Elliott’s dissertation. Since you have to re-defend your dissertation anyway, Ms. Elliott, any future impropriety concerning your relationship with Dr. Reeding will be moot if he’s removed from the committee.” She turned to Thad. “You’ll be removed from her committee and a new outside person put on instead….Further, I’m going to assume that you had no part in actually writing her dissertation.”
Thad shook his head vigorously. “Absolutely not, Dean. She wrote all of it herself.”
Dean Sullivan smiled again. “That’s what I figured. Would you be willing to sign something to that effect, just in case there are any questions?”
Thad nodded his head and smiled. “I’ll be glad to.”
Her eyes came to me again. “Now, Ms. Elliott, you’ll need a new main advisor. I’m not going to rely upon your Chair to influence your choice this time. Frankly, I’m appalled at the way he’s handled this fiasco, though he’s always been a small-minded sexist prick anyway.”
I snorted out loud. I couldn’t help it. She looked at me, pretending to be stern, while fighting to hold back a smile.
“Before I became Dean, I was in the political science department. I worked there for years, so I know it well. My specialty happens to be political communication. So….I’ll serve as your main advisor for your new defense. We need to schedule it right away because the President has to fill Dr. Hanover’s position with someone as soon as possible…” She actually grinned at me. Grinned!
I grinned back. What in the world just happened? Hanover and Gina were gone, my grievance was supported, and now I had a potential job offer? Was this like one of those movies where everything gets tied up into a perfect, shiny bow?
Thad finally spoke. “I can’t thank you enough, Dean Sullivan…..for everything.”
I nodded, “Thank you, Dean.”
Dean Sullivan smiled quickly. “You’re both very welcome.”
As we stood up to leave, she said, “You all should cherish the time you have together. True love is rare and life is short.” I thought I saw her eyes get a little glassy.
Then, her face got stern again. “Alright, get out of here. I have work to do…and, please, NO. MORE. DRAMA.”
***************
A few days later, I noticed that everyone up at the department had seemed to change their behavior toward me. I was no longer Hester Prynne. I was just Shay again. Even Dr. Grambling seemed to tolerate me without too many sneers. I wondered why the sudden change and Grant finally spilled the beans after too many beers.
“What did you say??!! She did what?” I screamed.
“Dean Sullivan put a Memo in all of the professor and graduate student mailboxes defending you. Something about if she hears anything further about a ‘hostile work environment’, she’ll cut our balls off….or more professional sounding words that mean the same thing….” I rolled my eyes at him and smiled. I was starting to really, really like that woman.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
If there was ever a perfect time to my life, that next month was pretty close. It was like your favorite romantic movie – great characters with chemistry, an interesting storyline, and a seemingly happy ending.
I was with the man of my dreams and I didn’t have to keep it a secret anymore. We could finally be together and out in the open. We had fantastic sex (a lot) and I thought he was “the one” – even though I’d never believed in that “the one” stuff before him. I noticed he began saying things with a connotation of a long-term future, like, “Someday we’ll go there…..” or “After you get tenure, we’ll….” Those moments always made my heart flutter. I loved his mother dearly and we were becoming really close. She was an amazing woman. Every weekend, I went with him to the worksite and helped out. I thought the world of all of the workers there, especially Roscoe. I’d even adopted Willie as my favorite “stepson”.
At the very beginning of the summer, I defended my dissertation successfully under Dean Sullivan. I was an official Ph.D. “Dr. Shay Elliott….” It had a nice ring to it, didn’t it? A week later, I interviewed for the new political science position. The committee, made up of six people from across the university, chose me for the job. I was set to start in mid-August.
Thad and I’d celebrated my new job with a nice dinner. Then we’d celebrated some more in the bedroom….with handcuffs.
Afterwards, when I went to put the handcuffs in his drawer, I’d made another discovery. Tucked in the corner of the drawer was my torn underwear from months before. I picked them up, turning toward Thad, who was lying blissfully sex-sated on the bed.
“What are these doing in here, you perv?” I teased.
His eyebrow arched up and his grin slowly spread across his face. “I couldn’t throw them away.”
I grinned back at him. “Why not?”
He cocked his head to the side, meeting my eyes. A serious look flashed across his handsome face. “They reminded me of you…..Of us…..Of the kitchen table….”
I nodded. “Yeah…..” I understood.
His seductive voice reverberated throughout the bedroom. “C’mere, Smiles….”
He wasn’t done with me yet.
***************
Life was perfect, it seemed.
That’s the thing about life and human beings living it, though. Nothing is perfect. No one is perfect. Life isn’t perfect. In real life, everything will be going along smoothly and then the storm will hit. In movies, you know the storm is coming and you know that there’s going to be a perfect, tied-in-a-bow happy ending at the end. That’s how movies work. In real life, though, you never know the storm is coming and there’s no guarantee of a perfect happy ending at all.
On the third Saturday in June, I went to my apartment to pick up some things before meeting Thad at the job site. The manila envelope was among a pile of nondescript mail, placed amid the phone bill and some pizza coupons. It was much heavier than a letter. My address was written neatly upon it and it was postmarked from Des Moines. That didn’t mean anything to me at the time. In fact, I wasn’t thinking about it at all.
I opened the envelope and peered inside. It was hard to tell what was in it, so I dumped the contents out on my kitchen counter.....
Photographs. Dozens. Photographs of a man and woman having sex. Explicit photographs of a man and woman having sex. Explicit photographs of man and woman having sex – with a third person. A second woman. Explicit photographs of a man having sex with not one, but two, women. What the he
ll?
Wait, was that my heart? What was that noise?! It was my heart. The beating was erratic and I could feel the thump, thump, thump ringing in my ears. The noise was like a soundtrack in a movie – sinister sounds that tell the audience something bad was happening. Something bad was happening. I closed my eyes and the images flashed through it....
It’s in those moments when you know something bad is about to happen, but you can’t stop it. You sense it; it permeates the very air you breathe. The fear of knowing is awful, but worse than that is the curiosity. You have to know.
I had to know. Oh god, I had to look again. I had to analyze every detail, every single pixel….I had to see....
I forced my shaky hands down to pick up the photographs and slowly opened my eyes to look again.
I recognized the muscles on the back and the curve of the ass. I knew the back of the head and the tousled hair, though it looked a bit shorter than usual. As I flipped through the photographs, I finally saw the curve of the tense jaw, framing eyes closed in the throes of passion. I knew that look. I knew it because I’d seen it when he made love to me.
It felt like there was a rock sitting on my stomach. A rock so heavy that it just sat there, holding my soul down like an anchor tied to a drowning body. Sickness. Despair.
I continued to analyze the photographs, one by one. Different sexual positions, two different women. Sometimes all three of them together. The nausea came in waves, but I willed my body to keep the bile down. It ate at my insides, roiling, roiling as I continued to stare.
I wasn’t an idiot. As soon as I allowed my brain to process what was happening, I knew immediately who’d sent these. She’d gone back to Iowa, obviously. I knew that she was one of the women in the pictures. As I flipped through them, my hands still shaking, I saw her features more clearly. Gina on her back, with Thad on top. Gina on top. Gina on all fours with Thad behind her – and another woman, unrecognizable, on her back in front of them with Gina’s head between her legs. Then, that woman on top of Thad, beneath him. There were so many. So many images.