What could plague him so much that he’d be in such a state?
“You grounded him?” Chad asks me, and I nod as Wes tilts his head back toward me.
“I’m an asthma kid, remember? Our mom used to do this for me when I couldn’t breathe,” I explain.
“It worked. Thank you,” Wes says, and I smile.
“You’re welcome. I just wish we knew why you were so upset.”
Wes shakes his head. “Probably papers due. Ball. Who knows?”
Chad doesn’t seem convinced. “You sure, man? We can go grab a beer if you need.”
“Maybe tomorrow. I’ll see how I feel. I’m much better.” Wes is nodding and rubbing his hands on his thighs.
“All right.” Chad puts his arms around Nicole. “Knock though. You need anything tonight, just knock, and I’ll come right out.”
“Thanks, man.”
I’m still sitting here, rubbing Wes’s back, while Chad is staring at me, nodding for me to leave the room and give Wes his privacy.
“Oh. Right.” I slide my legs away from him and stand up. “Night, Wes.” I don’t want to leave him. I also don’t want to cause him undue stress because of Chad.
I give a wave and leave.
A moment later, my phone vibrates on my bed. It’s Wes.
“Hey. Are you okay? For real?” I whisper into the phone.
“Thank you. That was awesome, what you did.”
“It was nothing. I wish I could help you more.”
“Stay on the phone with me. You can fall asleep. Just don’t hang up.”
My heart falls for him as I realize how vulnerable he must be in this moment to ask such a thing. “I can do that.”
And I do. With my head against the phone, I lie on my pillow and breathe softly as I close my eyes and go to sleep.
Chapter Seventeen
“Yay! You guys made it!” Mom says as she opens the door before we make it up the driveway of our childhood home. “How was the drive?”
“Much better in my Honda than Stacey’s tank—that’s for sure,” Chad says, which has me rolling my eyes.
“You just didn’t want it to overheat and have Nicole see you know zilch about cars.” I kiss my mom and give her a hug. “The drive wasn’t too bad. I sat in the backseat and slept.”
“Good, because you and I have a lot of cooking to do.” Mom beams as she turns to smile at Nicole, who is joining us for the Thanksgiving holiday. “These two rave about your cooking. You’ll be a wonderful addition to the kitchen as well.”
Nicole links arms with my mom, and we walk in the house together. “I really appreciate you welcoming me into your home for the holidays.”
Chad follows them in, carrying his and Nicole’s bags. I gather my own and stare up at the house I grew up in. My room faces the front, and I see the lavender drapes hanging in the window. I smile as I head inside my childhood home that hasn’t changed a bit.
No, it hasn’t been that long since I left, but I thought it would be different once I was gone. Isn’t that what empty nesters do? Convert your room into a home gym or something? Like they’d change things around to celebrate the freedom they have with no kids living at home, but even my room is the same as the day I left.
We bring our bags upstairs and get settled—me in my room, Nicole in Chad’s old room, and Chad on the couch. I laughed when I heard him on the phone with Mom days before we came, talking about how he and Nicole were basically living together so they should be able to share a room, but my parents stood firm that he had to sleep on the couch.
I fall onto my twin-sized bed and look at the mauve-flowered wallpaper and swim trophies on the dresser. So much has happened to me the past few months that this room almost feels childish. I long for my small makeshift room in the apartment with paper-thin walls and a sexy-as-hell man who sneaks in when we’re alone.
I left him a few hours ago, and I’m already thinking about him.
Thinking about the way his dimples grow deeper when he’s talking about friends.
Thinking about how his eyes light up when he’s watching a ball game.
Thinking of the way he runs his hands through his hair when he’s studying.
Thinking about the way he sings to himself when he’s making a protein shake.
Thinking of the way his scent intoxicates me when he holds me.
I lift my shirt and hope there’s a hint of Wes remaining on the cotton. There is, so I inhale.
This can’t be good.
I’m way too forgone for that man.
I pop up and walk downstairs, looking for something to eat.
“Are you guys heading out tonight?” Mom asks as we all meet in the kitchen, where she’s preparing dinner.
It’s tradition that everyone from high school meets at the local bar the night before Thanksgiving.
“Yeah. It’s the best time to catch up with everyone,” I respond.
“You know we’ll be there,” Chad says as he walks into the room. Nicole is behind him.
“You just want to show your girlfriend off to everyone,” I tease, which makes Nicole blush.
“You bet.” He sneaks a kiss on her cheek and sits down at the table.
As I grab a grape from a bowl of fruit on the counter, I can’t help but feel a small amount of jealousy.
Before I left for Berkeley, I hoped that campus might be the place I met my special someone. A guy who I’d laugh and talk with, a spontaneous man who’d whisk me off on mini rendezvous. Someone who had the same core beliefs as me or at least wouldn’t laugh when I said I wanted to save the planet in a conservative way. I also hoped that maybe, just maybe, I’d feel that spark.
The kind of spark I feel when I’m with Wes.
Dad comes home with a few bottles of wine and a script for an upcoming episode of his show. Nicole asks him a thousand questions about what it’s like filming, and Dad answers them all with glee. Mom and I sneak a wink to each other because we know he’s eating it up, and it’s good for him. He’s worked hard, keeping his dream afloat while supporting our family. It’s nice to see him reaping the rewards.
After dinner, the three of us head out to the bar. Chad and Nicole instantly go to his friends, who are at the pool tables, while I meet up with some of mine sitting at the bar.
“I’m so glad you made it!” Angie says. She’s my best friend from back home, who I haven’t spoken to in way too long. “You move away and completely forget about us non-college-goers.”
I laugh because I know she’s kidding about forgetting about her. That could never happen. We’ve been in each other’s lives since we were in second grade.
“Sorry. I know; I suck. School’s been intense,” I reply as I give Carlie and Emma, two other girls I grew up with, hugs.
“Hey, I’d forget about us, too, if I were living with Wesley Knight. Please tell me you get to see that fine specimen of a man without his shirt on a daily basis,” Emma says.
My heart rate picks up at just the mention of his name. I try to blow off the notion and act nonchalant about it. “You do realize I grew up with the guy, right?”
They all sigh with heart eyes in their expressions.
“You’re so lucky. Hell, I’d be happy with your brother just the same,” Carlie says, and I nudge her arm.
“Ew! I have a hard enough time, seeing him with his new girlfriend. I can’t imagine having him with one of my friends.” As soon as the words leave my mouth, my stomach turns.
Yes, pot, kettle, black and all that shit.
“Girl, what I would do to have one day with Wes Knight. I’d let that man tie me up, lick me up and down, and do what he pleases with that body of his,” Emma says, holding her hands behind her back and pretending she’s being tied up.
They all giggle when, deep inside, I want to tell them he’s more than just a hot piece of ass—and she hasn’t even seen how amazing said body has improved over the years. But he’s more than a gorgeous physique. He’s kind and deep, his laughter makes m
y heart happy, and his stories turn my bad moods around.
I can’t tell them any of this though.
He’s my deep, dark secret.
I go home earlier than everyone else, telling them I have to wake up early to help my mom cook in the morning. Really, I just want to curl up in bed and call Wes.
I put on my pajamas and brush my teeth, wondering if I should call. My first night away from him, and here I am, thinking about him, wanting him. Feeling like I can’t rest until I hear his voice.
I’ve never been like this. Never been so needy. It’s all so unnerving.
Fuck it. I pick up the phone and dial his number.
It only rings once.
“Miss me already?” Wes answers with that smooth, brooding voice.
I smile into my pillow, amazed at just how happy his voice makes me. “How’d your test go?”
“It was easy. Glad it’s over though. How was your night? I thought you’d be out, partying with friends.”
“I was, but I wanted to come home early. Wasn’t feeling it.”
He lowers the music in the background. “Everything okay?”
“Yeah. I just …” I bite my lip and look up at the ceiling, hesitant to say how I really feel but go for it anyway. “Is it weird that I miss you?”
As soon as the words come out of my mouth, I instantly regret them. We’re not that kind of couple. We’re not a real couple actually. We’re less than that. And more than that. I place my palm on my head, hoping I didn’t make things more complicated.
“No. It’s not weird. I found myself standing outside your door about an hour ago, and then I remembered you weren’t there.” His sigh-like laugh echoes through the receiver.
A huge smile builds on my face. “Really?”
“Yeah. I mean, there’s no one else here to tell me at least once a day what a jerk I am.”
“Well, if it brings you comfort, I’ll gladly sit here and let you know that you indeed are a jerk.”
He chuckles deeply, and I find myself curling up into the pillow with the phone to my ear, imagining we’re lying together.
“You should get some sleep. I know you have to be up early to help your mom.”
“My alarm is set for seven. What are your plans tomorrow? I wish you had taken my family’s invitation and come here for Thanksgiving.”
He lets out a deep sigh. I can picture him lying with his hand curled under his head and furrowing his brow. “They’re serving food at the commissary, but I’ll probably order Chinese and watch football.”
It’s silent for a moment as we sit here, absorbing each other’s thoughts. No one wants to be home alone on a holiday. Wes likes my family, and I know they love him.
It’s why I wonder, “Why won’t you come back to Los Angeles? What happened that keeps you away?”
“Nothing. Everything,” he breathes.
I know talking about his personal life isn’t easy. Because I know this, I don’t ask any more questions. I just listen. Because when Wes decides to open up to someone, you know it means you’ve earned his ultimate trust.
“It’s just not a place where I feel comfortable. I have a lot of good memories—don’t get me wrong—but they are all trampled by my family ones. I can’t explain it without getting into it, and trust me, I don’t want to.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to pry—”
“Stacey, you’re allowed to ask questions. I love that you want to ask. Just be okay with the fact that I might not be ready to share.”
“I like hearing your stories. The good and the bad.”
“Then, it’s a good thing I enjoy talking to you. You make my crap days a lot brighter.”
We stay up talking until two in the morning. When I hear Chad and Nicole come home, I look at the clock and realize I need to get some sleep. As I hang up, I have this feeling of contentment as I fall asleep. Spending the next four days without Wes is going to be hard.
Nicole and I help with preparing dinner as Chad and my dad watch football after they work in the yard.
Nicole fits in perfectly with our family, and I know my mom loves having her around. Our holiday is usually just the four of us since our grandparents and cousins all live in other states. Having an extra body around makes the house feel livelier. Maybe in a few years, it’ll be bustling with people. Chad and I will both be bringing people home and maybe start families of our own. It’s crazy to think we’re just a few years away from all that.
The thought makes me think of Wes.
Picturing him sitting here with us, as one family, would make everything complete. I reach for my phone multiple times, but I can’t seem to get privacy.
Around noon, I’m on my way to the bakery to pick up the pies my mom ordered, so I call Wes to see how he’s doing. When he doesn’t answer, I take my time, driving the back roads and taking wrong turns, but by the time I get back home, he never returns my call.
I’m worried he won’t go to the commissary and instead eat takeout alone. Even though he says he’s okay with staying home, I know he’s not. Wes likes people. He thrives when he’s interacting, and I worry that without that interaction on a day when you should be with your family, it will upset him even more.
After everything else is prepped, I head to my room to get more formally dressed for dinner and head back into the kitchen. Dad is taking the turkey out of the oven while Mom loads pans of prepared food in the oven to make sure they are warm enough.
“You look beautiful,” Dad says when he sees me.
I twirl in my fall dress with knee-high boots. “Thanks.”
He gives a wistful grin. “You’re so grown-up. I don’t know what’s going on at Berkeley, but you seem older. My little girl is gone.”
“She’s a woman now, Shane,” Mom says. “Soon, she’ll be out there, making a difference for our society and environment. She’s our brilliant, beautiful girl.”
Even though I should be used to my parents’ boasting, I blush. They’ve always been supportive, and it’s not lost on me how lucky that makes me.
There’s a knock at the door, which has us all looking at each other in wonder.
My dad heads to answer the door, and when I hear him announce, “Wesley. This is a surprise,” my heart pounds.
I turn around so fast that I have whiplash. Sure as the sun is golden, Wesley Knight is standing in my parents’ doorway. Blue jeans, a crimson sweater, and a leather jacket.
“I hope the invitation still stands for joining your holiday dinner,” he says as he holds out a bottle of wine to my dad.
“You know it does, son. Come on in.” Dad puts his arm around Wes. I see a flash of relief in his eyes as they walk in, and the door closes behind them. “Stacey, look who decided to come after all.”
The smile that instantly graces my face is hard to hide as my belly does flips at the sight of him here. “Good thing Mom cooks for an army. We could use an extra body at the table.” I smile brightly.
Wes’s hazel eyes sear into mine as he walks down the foyer. He drove six hours to be here. It might not have been to see me, but from the way he’s staring at me, I can pretend in this moment that I’m the only person in the world he wants to be with right now.
Mom brushes past me with her arms out as she greets him. “I’m so glad you made it! Let me take a look at you! Last I saw you was during the spring playoffs, and you’re even handsomer.”
She talks to him in rapid-fire about all the food she made and how there’s plenty of room for him to join us. She gushes about how happy she is to see him and runs her hand down his face, like he’s still the young boy who spent many days playing video games in her living room.
Chad and Nicole come downstairs, freshly changed for the holiday, and they exchange hugs with Wes.
“Dude! You actually came!” Chad exclaims.
I want so badly to rush over there and wrap my arms around him and show him how happy I am to see him, but I calm the urge and start washing the dishes in the sink, j
ust so I have something to do with all this nervous energy.
Mom and Dad make their way back into the kitchen to finish cooking while Nicole and Chad walk to the living room.
Wes comes back toward me and leans against the counter. I chance a glance at his rogue smile and become flush.
“What’s up, Squid?” Wes says as he leans in slightly with a hand in his pocket.
“You drove six hours and didn’t tell anyone you were coming?”
“What can I say? I like to make an entrance.”
I grin as I scrub the dish in my hand. Wes takes it from me along with a towel that was lying on the counter.
“Are you cool with your roommate crashing your family holiday?” he asks while drying the plate. “You’re not sick of always having me around, are you?”
When I look up into his eyes, I find myself lost in the acceptance they seek. I bite my lip and shake my head. “Not at all.”
As the broad smile graces his face, I turn my attention back to the sink and finish washing the spatula, handing it to him to dry. We’ve done this routine a dozen times at the apartment after Chad and Nicole cook, yet the familiarity suddenly feels more intimate now.
Dinner is torture. The food is delicious, the conversation is lively, yet having him so close and having to act like he’s the same Wes that drove me nuts my entire life is unbearable. Especially since he’s sitting next to me with his knee rubbing my leg in a not-so-subtle way.
I find myself questioning every word that comes out of my mouth. I wonder if I’m being too obvious or acting weird either way, so toward the end, I stand up and start clearing the table. I notice the way Nicole smiles at me but try to ignore it and go about my business as the helpful daughter who seemingly has no one special here to sit with and visit.
We spend the rest of the night playing Taboo—or what we call the beeping game because of the obnoxious noise the game makes.
Mom pours wine for the women while Dad breaks out the scotch. As we pick the two teams, we decide girls against boys. Mom and Dad are at each end of the table while Chad and Nicole take their seats. Wes is next to me, but this time, it’s more than his knee that rubs against me.
Rebel Roommate: A Brother's Best Friend Romance Page 16