“Believe what you want. I’m done wasting my time on Jace. Tessa won the Ordeal. It’s done.” Irritation sparked through me.
“I call bullshit on that.” Jolene chimed in. “There’s no way you’re not upset about Tessa beating you in the Ordeal. She’s a half-blood for crying out loud.”
“Jesus.” Avery slapped her on the arm. “Way to make her feel even worse.”
Jolene’s eyes widened as she realized what she’d said—I’d been beaten by a half-blood, someone who wasn’t even a full-blooded werewolf. It was the lowest of low on our totem pole. An abomination.
My blood boiled. How could she think I would forget such a thing? I squared my shoulders and glanced at both girls. “I know, but there isn’t anything I can do to change what happened. It’s done. Pack Law decrees I have to accept the two of them together. I have no other choice.”
“We know.” Avery frowned. “It just sucks there isn’t a way to change it.”
“We need a time machine.” Jolene added. “I’m sure if you could go back you’d have no problem kicking her ass the second time around.”
I have something better, I thought to myself, I’ve got a Lover Scorned potion.
“No, what we need is a drink.” Avery insisted. Her lips twisted into a smirk. “You both know I’m right.”
“I don’t think either of us will argue with you.” Jolene chimed in.
“Mother has a variety of wines in the kitchen. I doubt she would mind if we cracked one open.”
The girls were on my heels as I exited my room and started down the hallway. A night spent with my two closest friends and a few bottles of my mother’s finest wine was exactly what I needed.
A few hours later we’d watched the entire first season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, consumed two bottles of wine, and had each eaten our weight in popcorn and chocolate when my mother came home. I wasn’t sure where she’d been, but she was definitely dressed to impress in black stilettos and a sexy red number. She looked stunning, as always. However, the annoyed glare reflected in her eyes assured me she wasn’t in the mood for company tonight.
“I think we’re going to head home.” Avery muttered, picking up on my mother’s ill mood instantly. “We’ll talk to you tomorrow.” She grabbed Jolene by the arm and pulled her to her feet.
“Okay, yeah, see you tomorrow.” Jolene fumbled her words. It was clear she hadn’t taken note to my mother’s attitude and was clueless as to why Avery was insisting they rush off.
“Bye. I’ll call you both tomorrow.” I waved at them as they scampered past my mother and out the front door. My eyes shifted to my mother. Her stare was even more murderous than it had been seconds before. What was she angry with me for now? “Hi.”
“Tell me it isn’t true.” She spat.
“That what isn’t true?”
“Tell me you didn’t sleep with Gavin in the woods after the Bonding Ceremony.”
I knew she wouldn’t be happy when she found out. It wasn’t the most lady-like thing to do. My eyes fell to my lap. “I can’t.”
“Do you know how such a thing looks? If you have any intentions of getting back your place beside Jace as Alpha Queen, why would you do such a thing?” Her words were harsh, biting. I’d never seen her so angry.
“It was a spur of the moment thing. I was angry and upset. My emotions got the best of me.”
“And you allowed him to become your release.” She ran a hand through her hair and let out a long sigh. “I understand. I do. The only issue with your actions is if things between you and Jace happen to work the way we would like once Tessa is gone, Gavin now has claim to you. He can choose to fight for you.” Her arms waved around wildly as she spoke.
I didn’t understand why this bothered my mother so much. Didn’t she know nothing like that would happen because no one loved me enough to fight for me? Not Jace, he’d chosen Tessa over me. And not Gavin. The night in the woods with him was fun and meaningless to both of us. He didn’t care about me. He only cared about what my body could make him feel in that specific instant.
“It’ll be fine.” I assured her. “Gavin doesn’t think of me in that way. It was a mistake, but a meaningless one on both our parts.” There wouldn’t be any issues that arose from it. Gavin had wanted me in a sexual way since as far back as I could remember, and now that he’d finally gotten it I was sure his feelings were gone.
“I hope you’re right. For your sake.” She paced back and forth where she stood. “We need the next few months to go smoothly. No more bumps. No more obstacles. You need to be at Jace’s side as you were born to be. That’s all there is to it.” Her face was twisted with worry and rage mingled together.
I understood her frantic desire to fix this mess I’d created. If I didn’t get my place beside Jace back, then I would have tarnished everything she’d worked so many years to create for us. I’d caused all of her hard work to disintegrate by losing the Ordeal to Tessa.
Determination burned through my gut. I would kill Tessa and take my place at Jace’s side. There was no other option. I wouldn’t bow down to their love and submit to her as my superior again. It wasn’t happening.
Tessa’s days were numbered, and I was the one holding the hourglass.
Chapter 5
I woke the next morning to my heart pounding in my throat. Anxiety prickled across my skin, leaving a flushed trail in its wake. I needed to move, to do something to disperse myself of the nervous energy coursing through me. Not only would it do me no good to have my mind clogged with fears and nerves during the acceptance dinner, it would also give me away, which was something I couldn’t allow to happen. No one could ever know what I had planned. Once I followed through with it, there wasn’t another soul on the planet who needed to know what I had done besides my mother. There was no telling what Jace would do to me if he ever found out.
My mind drifted as I imagined him somehow figuring out what I had done after Tessa’s demise. I pictured him angry and red-faced, banishing me from the pack, but I knew that would be the least of my worries. He wouldn’t banish me. No, Jace would more than likely kill me.
Slipping out of bed, I decided the only way to rid myself of the excess energy I harbored was to go for a morning run. I changed into a thin pair of yoga pants and grabbed an oversized hoodie from inside my closet before tugging on my sneakers. Running as a wolf would have been a better choice, but with the full moon over this would have to do. As I twisted my long hair into a high ponytail, I tried to remember if I had any plans for this morning. The need to run for as long as I could pulsed through me, but I wanted to be sure I wasn’t forgetting anything my mother may have planned for this morning and piss her off more than I already had. When nothing important came to mind, I headed for the kitchen.
I grabbed a bottle of water from in the fridge and downed half of it. While I didn’t have a hangover, I still felt dehydrated from my recent alcohol binges.
Listening to my mother’s even breathing echo through the house, I made my way to the front door, eager to ground some of my excess energy into the pavement.
Cool night air caressed my skin as I stepped outside. The sun wasn’t up yet, which meant everything was still cast in shadows. I could see just fine though. One of the perks of being a werewolf was my sight happened to be better in the dark. It was a predator thing. I started down the steps to our porch and paused. Stretching before a run was something I enjoyed. It loosened my stiff muscles, preparing them to release all tension during my run. Stretching was vital.
Once I was ready, I broke out into a slow jog, feeling my feet pound into the pavement of the driveway beneath me. The cool morning air whipped across my face as I gradually picked up pace. There was nothing more freeing than running. I felt the same whether I was in my wolf form or my human one. Exhilaration coursed through me in both forms. The sense of power was undeniable. Each body had its own advantages over the other, but both were equally majestic.
The sound of another’s rapid
footfalls in the distance captured my attention, followed by low strains of music. Someone else was out for a morning run before sunrise as well. I focused on their determined and powerful pace, trying to distinguish if they were human from their footfalls. It was freezing out, but this was rarely a deterrence for anyone who valued a workout before heading to their nine to five job. I slowed my pace purposely, allowing them to catch up. My senses sharpened as they neared me. The person was male. I could tell from the sound of his breathing. He was also listening to an unfamiliar rock band.
“And my morning just got better,” a familiar voice drawled.
Gavin. I should have known it was him. Shit. He was the last person I wanted to see this morning. In seconds, he matched my pace perfectly.
“Don’t be so quick to judge.” I said.
“You’re right.” He dialed down the volume on his earbuds and slowed his pace until he was running behind me again. “There we go. Now I can say for sure this has made my morning.”
I could feel his eyes on my ass. A smirk twisted my lips, even though I tried to fight it. He was cute, when he wanted to be. I stopped mid-stride, causing him to nearly plow into me. He maneuvered around me just in the nick of time. “That’s not happening.” I growled.
“Aw, come on. You didn’t have any qualms the other night when it came to my view.” A devilish grin spread across his face. It was adorable.
“Either you run beside me or you move ahead of me.” I snapped.
“Okay. Dang, someone’s a little testy this morning.”
“I have every right to be.” I muttered as I started forward again.
“You’re right. You do.” He matched my pace. “How are you holding up?”
“I’m not looking forward to tonight, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“I didn’t think you would be. You’ll make it through it though, you’re strong.”
My teeth ground together. “I know.”
His words were exactly what I needed to hear, but for a different reason than he thought. Gavin had no clue he was pumping me up to kill our newly crowned Alpha Queen.
“If you need a way to relieve your stress, or nerves, or whatever, I can help you.” He flashed me another wicked grin and preceded to wiggle his eyebrows in a suggestive manner.
“Thanks, but no thanks.” I picked up my pace.
Was my mother right? Did Gavin have feelings for me? If so, things might end up being a lot more complicated than I’d originally thought.
I glanced at him from the corner of my eye as I continued pushing forward. He was handsome, had a personality, and was great in the sack. I could do worse.
“I see you thinking about it.” Gavin smoothed his hand over his chest and down his abs as he matched my pace. “All of this is tempting you, isn’t it?”
“Not in the least.” I lied and pressed forward, leaving him in my dust.
Being around Gavin was clouding my mind. I needed space. From my thoughts. From my body. From everything.
Tonight was important, and in order to remain on my toes and make it through unscratched, I needed to focus. Running would bring me that, but only if I did it alone. I pushed myself harder without looking back. Gavin was there, I could hear his footfalls hitting against the pavement out of sync with mine, but he didn’t try to catch up to me. I was glad he seemed to understand my need for distance from everything, including him.
I ran until I was heaving for breath, until my feet were numb from constantly meeting with the pavement, and until my entire body felt purged of the emotions I’d been drowning in. It was in that blissful state of exhaustion that I was able to finally gather myself enough to prepare for the night ahead.
Chapter 6
My stomach was in knots as I seated myself at the table across from Jace, Tessa, and Jace’s parents. Choosing to focus on the cause of my unease, I attempted to pinpoint what exactly had me feeling like a bundle of nerves. Was it the fact that I planned to poison Tessa tonight, or the sight of Jace and Tessa together and happy in an up close and personal setting?
I decided it was the latter.
“Smile,” my mother hissed under her breath.
Without hesitation my lips twisted into a perfect bow of a smile. I knew it was important to appear as though I was happy for them, which meant this might be the greatest performance of my life.
“I’m glad you agreed to attend tonight.” Jace said. His voice was soft, careful. He knew how much this dinner was probably hurting me.
God, he was always such a sweetheart.
I bowed my head exactly as I was supposed to. “It’s my pleasure.”
When I glanced up, his eyes were fixated on me. I could see the unease and tension crinkling the corners of them. It let me know this wasn’t easy for him either. It was awkward for all of us, but mainly for the two of us. I realized this now. Thoughts of how this dinner never should be taking place entered both of our minds. We should be off consummating our union to one another, but we weren’t. My eyes shifted to Tessa, because it was all her fault.
Our waiter came then and we placed our drink orders. Anticipation buzzed through me as I shifted through how the rest of the night would play out in my mind’s eye.
“Tell us, Tessa, how are you adjusting to the idea of being Alpha Queen?” My mother asked. I wasn’t sure if it was her way of keeping the conversation flowing or if she merely enjoyed putting Tessa on the spot. Either way, I approved. Watching Tessa squirm was always fun.
“Well, I’m not sure the entire thing has sunk in yet.” Tessa tucked a few strands of her blond hair behind her ear.
“I’m sure. After all, being opened to this world you never knew existed must have been life-altering enough, and now all this…” My mother made a sweeping motion to Jace and his parents, signifying the royalty they were. “I’m sure you’ll learn to cope soon enough though. You seem strong and bright.” There was an edge embedded within her last words. I wasn’t sure the others caught it, but I noticed how the sentence slithered past her lips. It was intended to be a jab at me. A reminder of how Tessa beat me when she shouldn’t have. I was stronger than her. I was a born werewolf. She shouldn’t have stood a chance against me in the Ordeal.
I thought of the vial in my clutch. I’d show my mother exactly how strong I was when I executed our plan perfectly tonight. She would be proud of me once again. I would make sure of it.
Our drinks were brought then. I reached for mine, ready to take a tentative sip to calm my nerves, but Nicolas raised his glass to present the traditional toast. I knew it was coming. While I had never attended an acceptance dinner before, for obvious reasons, I knew what I was supposed to do here. Every pack member did. We were supposed to hold our glasses high as the traditional toast was given. I did as I was supposed to and recited the words along with everyone else:
“May God be with you and bless you. May you see your children’s children. May you be poor in misfortunes and rich in blessings. May you know nothing but happiness from this day forward.” It was an old Irish wedding blessing our pack had adopted long ago. I should feel strength and love while saying it, but the words felt like daggers slicing at my throat as they came out. Until I remembered none of those things would happen for these two. I had the source of their destruction in my purse. A sense of power I had never known before flowed through me at the thought.
My mother nudged me with her elbow beneath the table. The moment I had been experiencing evaporated at her touch. I knew what the nudge was about. Reaching inside my bag, I grabbed the customary gift she had purchased for Jace and Tessa I was supposed to pass over. This was phase one in our plan.
“As is customary, I have something I’d like to give you.” I locked my eyes on Tessa. She seemed to have been expecting this part of the night, but still appeared uneasy. It rolled off her in waves. I licked my lips in hopes of hiding the satisfied smirk attempting to twist at my lips. I wanted her to fear me still. After all, it was best that she did. “It’s a t
oken of my acceptance of your union. I only want you to be happy.” My gaze shifted to Jace, and I locked eyes with him. There was sadness there. I wondered if it was because he felt bad about the way things had turned out for us or if he felt bad about the situation in general. An acceptance dinner with all its customs was more like pouring salt in an open wound. He had to see that.
“Thank you.” Tessa smiled. She was pretty, but only when she smiled. Otherwise she looked rather plain. Jace needed someone with more flare. Jace needed me. We would make some beautiful babies together.
I moved to extend my hand and give the gift to her, but as I did so I made sure to knock over her drink in the process. Red wine spilled onto the cream-colored table cloth. It resembled blood on creamy skin. I couldn’t help but think of it as an omen for what was to come.
“I’m so sorry. Here.” I jumped up to wipe the area with my napkin.
“It’s okay.” Tessa grinned. “Nothing got on me. Everything’s fine. I can always order another.”
“I imagine everyone is a little skittish tonight. No apologies needed.” Vivian chimed in.
In that moment, I detested Jace’s mother. How dare she imply I was skittish because of this half-blood before me. If only she knew it was all part of a larger plan. Unless she did. She was my mother’s best friend after all. I glanced at my mother as I sat, wondering if she had let Vivian in on our plan for the night. She gave me a slight nod, and I caught a glimmer of approval in her eye. Any speculation about Vivian knowing left my mind. Mother was proud of me, even if it was only for a second.
Step one was complete. Now on to step two.
“Oh my goodness. This is beautiful.” Tessa cooed as she opened the gift my mother had chosen. “I love it. Thank you.”
I had no clue what the gift was, but I glanced at it anyway and forced a smile onto my face. “You’re welcome.”
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