Shit.
“Hello?”
“Hello, I’m looking for Axel Bryant.”
“That’s me,” I said. “My grandmother’s a resident there. Rose Bryant. Is everything okay?” I hoped so. The last thing I wanted to do was deal with her.
“Your grandmother suffered a stroke last night, Mr. Bryant. I’m sorry to have to tell you this over the phone, but she didn’t make it. You are listed as her next of kin, although we’ve never seen you here.” I couldn’t miss the note of disapproval in her voice, and I guessed to her I must have seemed like a pretty shitty person, leaving my grandmother on her own for years at a nursing facility. I wondered how she’d take it if she knew the only emotion I felt at the news of Rose Bryant’s passing was relief.
“Thank you for notifying me.”
“We need instructions on what to do with her remains,” the woman said, and I closed my eyes and sighed. I supposed that would fall to me.
“Look, the old lady and I weren’t exactly close. Didn’t she leave any instructions? Her husband was cremated and sprinkled over the farm.” Right in a pile of horse manure.
I heard papers rustling before the woman spoke again. “There’s a lawyer’s name in her file. Theodore Jacobs.”
I ran my hand through my hair. “Right. Call him. He’ll know.” I disconnected. Ten minutes left until Caleb’s appointment would be over. I finished the chapter I was reading and, on impulse, bought the book. I’d just tucked it into my leather riding sack when Caleb walked out the glass doors.
When he saw me, he grinned, showing a dimple in each cheek, and my heart turned over. I couldn’t help mysel; when he got close, I kissed him, swiping my tongue through his soft, warm mouth before letting go of him. I handed him the extra helmet.
“Where you wanna eat?”
Caleb’s expression immediately changed from happy to panicked, and I could have kicked myself. Of course he wouldn’t want to eat out in public.
“We can pick something up to take home,” I said, belatedly realizing I’d made it sound like we lived together.
“No, I’d like to try eating out,” Caleb said. “I just want someplace that’s not very crowded, you know?” He looked at me so trustingly, I wasn’t about to let him down.
“There’s a deli close to here that has outdoor seating,” I suggested. “Would that be good?”
Caleb’s face lit up. “Perfect!”
When we’d reached the deli and had secured a seat under the awning, I watched as Caleb slowly adjusted to his surroundings. His body language screamed high alert, but he seemed okay for the most part. Luckily, there weren’t many people sitting outside, probably because it was chilly there in the shade. Autumn was settling in. The leaves of the maples along the sidewalk were turning red.
“How’d your appointment go?” I asked, unsure if that was something Caleb would want to talk about or not. I hoped he would tell me if it wasn’t.
“Good. Dana seemed happy about my progress, although she warned me not to push myself. She always says that. What I can’t get her to understand is I’ve spent a long time without making any progress at all. I’m anxious to catch up.”
“All you gotta say is it’s too much, and I’ll stop whatever’s happening, take you home, take a step back, whatever.”
Caleb smile was warm. His next words knocked me over like a punch to the jaw.
“Axel, will you be my boyfriend?”
My pulse started racing. When I didn’t immediately respond, Caleb’s face grew red, and he looked down at his lap.
“I mean, yeah,” I quickly said. “If that’s what you want. Of course I will.”
Caleb turned his head to look out at the busy street, the cool breeze lifting the dark curls on his head and setting them down again.
“I didn’t stop to think maybe you wouldn’t want to date somebody who has so many issues. I can understand if you don’t. I don’t want you to feel sorry for me or anything. I just really like you.”
“I’m having trouble wrapping my head around that, to be honest,” I said, drawing his gaze to me.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, besides the fact I’m obviously not good enough for someone like you, for a long time just the sight of me terrified you.”
Caleb frowned, latching onto the first part of my statement. “Why wouldn’t you be good enough for me?”
Amused that he’d have to ask, I let out a puff of air. “I’m a tattooed biker with a rap sheet as long as my arm. I’m also a high school dropout and the road captain of a motorcycle club.”
“Yeah. So? All that stuff just makes you hot. Well, the tattoos and the motorcycle part. And I don’t mind the rest because I’ve gotten to know you.”
Could this really be happening? After three years and pretty much running out of hope, could it really be this easy? I reached across the table for Caleb’s hand and squeezed it.
“I can’t think of anybody I’d want to date more,” I said, a little surprised by how easy the words fell from my lips. A couple passing our table gave us a weird side-look, but my glare sent them scurrying.
Caleb laughed.
“What?”
“I love how you scare the shit out of assholes like that.”
“Oh.” I chuckled. “They deserve it.”
Caleb nodded.
A waitress came out and took our order. I was so proud of how Caleb seemed to be taking everything in stride. He didn’t look like he was about to jump out of his skin as he did at Sunday dinners. The lack of big bikers could be what contributed to that though.
We ate our lunch and talked about the animals at the shelter. The rabbit looked like it was doing okay that morning when we’d checked on it in the hutch I’d built. Caleb had asked the vet to stop by when he had time.
Too soon, lunch was over, and I had to drop off Caleb at home. When he climbed off my bike, he leaned in and pressed a kiss to my lips that got my heart pumping and my dick hard.
“Come back soon,” he said. “Anytime. Okay?”
I smiled and nodded. As Caleb headed for the front porch, I spotted Isaac walking toward us from the main house. I waved to him, cranked up my bike, and drove away.
****
I heard the yelling before I reached the steps to the clubhouse porch. When I opened the front door, Matteo was sitting calmly on the couch eating a sandwich, seemingly unperturbed by whatever was going on in the back of the house.
At my questioning look, Matteo shrugged. “Hung’s pissed off Nick somehow. Again.”
I paused to listen to the tirade.
“All you do is drink and fuck!” Nick yelled.
Smashing glass preceded Hung’s bellow of outrage.
“I don’t need you micromanaging my life! And stop throwing things!”
“Obviously, you do, or Blaze wouldn’t have asked me to do it.” Nick’s sarcastic retort brought a smile to my face. “I heard you royally fucked up your last shoot too.”
“Oh, yeah? You were off somewhere being nailed by some rich fuck, so how would you even know?”
“Everyone knows. What the hell’s wrong with you? You’re supposed to be re-filming that same scene in less than two hours, and here I find you stinking of a night of booze with some twink still in your bed.” Nick sounded disgusted, and I had to wonder along with him what was going on with Hung. When I looked at Matteo, his eyes mirrored my concern.
“Excuse me, some twink coming through.” Mick breezed through the living room, heading for the front door.
“Shirt’s inside out,” I told him as he grabbed his jacket off the hall tree.
“Had to dress in a rush,” he said, glancing back toward the hall where the yelling had dropped off to venomous whispering. “They used to be a thing or something?”
I shook my head.
“Huh. Well, they fight like married people.” Mick left, and I sat down in the chair across from Matteo.
“They kinda do,” I said.
A door slam
med and then another door slammed, and the house fell blessedly quiet.
“Where’ve you been?” Matteo asked.
“Spent the night out.”
“I figured that,” Matteo said with a huff. “Dante’s?”
I nodded. Close enough.
“You know, Hung’s not the only one acting weird lately, and considering every time one of the guys acts weird I wind up finding out he’s head over heels for somebody, I gotta wonder about you and Caleb. Haven’t seen any other guys around, except that one.” Matteo cocked his head in the direction of the sound of Mick’s car pulling out of the driveway. “So, what’s up?”
When I just stood silently staring at the wall, Matteo said, “Come on, Ax. You’re acting like you got something to be ashamed of. Caleb’s not underage, is he?”
I shot him a look. “He’s twenty-one.”
“Okay, then what’s the problem? You’ve been mooning over him a long time. If something’s happening, I’m glad for you.”
I fell into the chair and rubbed my eyes. “I dunno. I guess Isaac’s misgivings have put a damper on things.”
“What do you mean?”
“He’s worried I’ll get hurt because he thinks Caleb won’t be able to handle a relationship.”
“What do you think?” Matteo asked.
I met my friend’s dark eyes. “I was about to give up. Thought so much time had passed with no real sign of interest from Caleb, I’d be pathetic to keep hanging on. But all of a sudden things started changing. Caleb invited me inside the house alone with him, something he’d never done before. We started talking. Had a couple picnics outside. He kissed me.”
Matteo’s brows shot up. “I’d say that’s a good sign.”
I chuckled. “Yeah. Surprised the hell out of me. And since then, although I’ve tried to take it slow, Caleb’s made it clear slow is not what he wants. He asked me to be his boyfriend.”
Matteo grinned. “That’s great, buddy! I don’t see why you aren’t celebrating. And you spent the night with him last night?”
I nodded. “Nothing happened. Not a lot, anyway. But I think it could, and I’m afraid of hurting him somehow. He says he wasn’t physically attacked that night his family was killed, and I’m relieved about that. But what we got between us has come on so suddenly, I’m afraid it’s gonna fizzle out just as fast.”
“It’s taken Caleb three years to get used to you,” Matteo said. “That’s not fast. If he thinks he’s ready for something more now, you gotta trust him.”
Hope sparked. “You think so?”
“Yeah, man. Stop being so mopey when things are finally looking up for you. Besides, you said Isaac’s concern was for you, so if you’re okay, he doesn’t have anything to worry about.”
I couldn’t help but smile. Maybe it was as easy as that. A weight lifted from my shoulders. “Thanks, Bullseye.” I ruffled Matteo’s thick hair, and he growled and pushed me away.
I headed for the bedroom. The door swung open as I reached for the knob, and Hung plowed into me.
“Watch it!” he said on a growl. I shoved him off me.
“You watch it. What’s up your ass?”
Hung didn’t answer, just strode toward the back door. I peered into our room to make sure no one else was in there, and finding it empty, got some clean clothes.
I took a shower, thinking over my conversation with Matteo and getting more hopeful by the minute. Maybe he was right: instead of worrying over every move I made, I ought to be enjoying the fact that I could be with Caleb. Touch him. Talk to him whenever I wanted. He wanted to be my boyfriend, for Christ’s sake. I should be on cloud nine.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Caleb
Axel took a couple extra shifts for a sick friend and couldn’t make it to see me for several days. I was shocked at how quickly I’d gone from being scared to let him inside the house to wanting him there all the time. I was still reeling from the speed at which his bulk had gone from something that terrified me to something that made me feel safe and even turned me on.
During my last appointment, Dana’s warning about going too fast had rankled. I’d expected praise at my progress, not a lecture on how I might set myself back, gentle as it had been given.
I felt good—really good—and wanted to enjoy it. I was a normal guy with a new boyfriend. And damn, I wanted to get my hands on Axel’s body. After having had his cock in my mouth and mine in his, it was all I could think about. I stayed hard pretty much all the time, impatient for Thursday to get there, the night Axel had promised to come over after work and stay the night.
On Tuesday, Hugh came by to look at the rabbit. He said she’d heal, gave me a few pointers about taking care of her and releasing her, and then checked the two big dogs Isaac had brought from the pound. One was a pit mix, a breed difficult to adopt out, and the other some kind of shaggy shepherd mix. They had both been scheduled to be put down, and Isaac being the softy he was, had taken them.
I was raking leaves out front, Duke lying in the sun close by chewing on a bone, when one of the guys who’d brought the rabbit—Brad, I thought his name was—suddenly appeared from out of the woods, walking toward me. I was proud of myself for not throwing the rake at him and running for the house like a crazy person. It might have had something to do with Hugh being in the kennel nearby, but I still counted it a win.
“Hey,” Brad said to me and knelt to pet Duke before approaching where I stood. “Jerry and I were just talking about the rabbit. Thought I’d come by and see if it made it.”
“She’s doing better. The vet said I could release her next week.” I managed to meet his gaze before quickly looking away. Another win.
Brad pushed his hands into the pockets of his jeans and smiled. “That’s great.”
I started raking again. The guy made me uncomfortable, but so did pretty much everyone. Keeping my hands busy helped with the awkwardness.
“This is a nice place,” Brad said, eyes sweeping the kennels and house. “You own it?”
I shook my head. “My friends do.”
Brad nodded. “They drive motorcycles? Is one of them the big guy who was here the day we brought the rabbit?”
I nodded. “That was Axel you met. He’s my boyfriend.” I flushed with pleasure just saying it. “Dante and Isaac live in the main house. Isaac doesn’t ride, but Axel and Dante are in a motorcycle club.”
“So all of you are gay?” Brad asked, and I stopped raking to look at him, relieved when I didn’t see condemnation on his face.
“Yeah.”
“Your boyfriend’s fierce, man.”
I nodded. “He is.”
“He live here too?” Brad stepped closer, and I automatically moved closer to the kennels. One of the dogs inside started barking.
Before I could answer, Hugh walked out of the kennels, his leather work bag in his hand. He seemed surprised to see Brad, which I guess made sense, as I didn’t entertain a lot and had been out there alone not ten minutes ago.
I introduced them, pausing because I didn’t know Brad’s last name. Instead of supplying it, Brad looked at his phone and announced he was late for something. With a friendly wave, he walked away.
“Where’d he come from?” Hugh asked, staring after Brad disappearing into the woods.
“He lives in Deirdre’s old house,” I said, knowing Hugh knew which one that was. “He’s the one who brought the rabbit to me.”
Hugh turned back to face me. “The two new dogs are healthy. Tell Isaac I recommend bringing the pit mix to my office for a teeth cleaning. I’ve vaccinated them both.” He handed me a paper that had a couple of rabies tags taped to it.
“Thanks.” I trailed behind Hugh to where he’d parked his Kia and watched as he hefted his medical bag into the backseat.
“Call if you need me,” he said with a wave.
I watched him go, thinking about how Isaac had dated Hugh some before permanently getting with Dante. Hugh Silvers was a nice-looking man, and I was su
rprised he hadn’t been snapped up yet. I, however, preferred a certain muscular, tatted biker. Looking at my phone, I impulsively tapped out a text to Axel.
Miss you. Hope you’re not working too hard.
Even though it was after one in the afternoon, I knew Axel might still be sleeping after working two shifts the night before, so I was surprised when a text came through almost immediately.
Was just thinking about you, Sunshine. Not too bad. Hope to make it over there Thursday.
I perked up, and not just from the thought of getting to see him again. He’d called me a pet name. Sunshine. Jeez, I’d think I was the furthest thing from sunshine you could imagine, but I supposed Dark Cloud of Doom or Quivering Mass of Needy Hysteria didn’t make good nicknames for a boyfriend. My thumbs flew over the keyboard.
That would be awesome. You can spend the night.
I hoped I wasn’t being too forward, but I couldn’t help it; having Axel next to me had given me the best night of sleep I’d had since it happened. Plus, I wanted to touch him some more. This time in a bed, not outside on the ground.
I smiled and began raking again after Axel texted that he’d look forward to it.
When I’d finished, I walked the two small dogs around the property, stopping on my way back to give Isaac the paper from Hugh. The day Axel had taken me to my appointment and Isaac had seen us kiss, he’d asked me if Axel and I were officially seeing each other. I’d been unable to contain my excitement when I’d said we were, and although Isaac had responded with a smile and a comment about what a great guy Axel was, I’d felt as though he was still worried I’d wind up hurting Axel in the long run.
“You still don’t approve, do you,” I stated. I really liked Isaac and wanted everything to be good between us. He didn’t have to answer; his guilty look confirmed my suspicion.
“I’m not going to hurt him,” I said.
“I know you wouldn’t on purpose. It’s just Axel’s barely looked at anyone else since the day he met you. Are you sure you’re ready for a relationship?”
I’d just digested the first part of the sentence when the last came crashing down on me, and anger sparked. “It’s been four fucking years! My God, how long do I have to wait to be happy?” I hadn’t meant to yell. Fuck, what was wrong with me? “I’m sorry,” I said, rubbing my hands over my face.
The Survivor and his Safe Place Page 12