I nodded once, acquiescing to his request. Gazing up nervously, I expected to find some form of triumph in his gaze, but there was only warmth. Only want.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
My heart beat so hard it almost hurt, and I wondered if he could hear, but then none of that mattered and a blanket draped over every thought I could have.
The first touch of our mouths made me jolt, and despite the closeness of our faces, my eyes sprang wide.
Pulling back merely a fraction, Ethan smiled softly before tightening his hold and tugging me forward again to settle his mouth completely against mine.
Despite the way his eyes drifted shut, the way I noticed how each of his long dark lashes swept against his smooth skin, I couldn’t close mine.
I couldn’t do anything but sit and stare. Sit there and marvel at the way his lips moved over mine, giving something I’d never felt. His mouth was soft and warm, moving against mine with gentle yet firm strokes. His breath tickled when it brushed over my moistened lower lip, and excitement raced up my spine when he drew my upper lip firmly between his.
I watched him suck deeply, massaging the sensitive flesh, lavishing attention on something previously ignored.
When he finally released, he didn’t lift his head, instead brushing our mouths together once, twice before settling deep again.
I’d never felt anything like this. Not ever in my entire life. I was practically frozen with awe, unable to form a thought, unable to make sense of the emotions rolling over me with every single meeting of our lips.
Easing back, he brought my lower lip with him, tugging it, practically claiming ownership before releasing it back to my custody.
I still stared, eyes wide, sight blurred, and now my lips slick from his.
While he still cradled my face, his breath fanned out with his whisper. “Do you like it?”
Oh, yes.
All I could do was nod.
He smiled, the action making little crinkles at the corners of his eyes.
“Kiss me back, then.” He summoned, lowering his head once more.
A surging tide of warmth enveloped me, and this time when he kissed, my lips puckered to meet his, moving against his despite the way they trembled. The feelings arising in me were so heavy my eyes didn’t dare stay open, this time closing and giving myself up to everything he offered.
One of his hands slid down to the side of my neck, and I tilted my head a bit when he intensified the kiss. A low moan formed in my throat, filling the air overhead.
I didn’t know it could be like this.
My eyes flew wide when his tongue licked across my lower lip, teasing the space where they met.
Instinctively, I parted, and he swept inside, tangling our tongues together, deepening the kiss so much that my hands clung onto his shoulders, seeking an anchor in this dizzy, swaying world.
He continued to kiss, encouraging every response I gave from the slight shiver of my back to the low moans escaping between us. Hands falling away, they slipped around my waist, his palms so wide that when he tugged my body closer, the entire small of my back was possessed by him.
Tongue retreating, I chased after it, probing with mine but coming up lost. I might have felt bereft, but his lips soothed the ache, keeping contact as he suddenly stood, bringing me with him.
My gasp broke our kiss, and for the first time, I noticed how my lungs burned for air.
Entirely focused on me, Ethan sat in the center of the couch, bringing me along so I was straddling his lap.
Still gasping for breath, he smiled, swiping the pad of his thumb over my lower lip. “You sure you’ve never kissed anyone before?”
Overcome with bashfulness, I leaned forward, hiding my face in the side of his neck. “Was I very bad?” My small voice was muffled against his skin.
He tried to pull me back, but I resisted, burrowing even deeper against him. How could I look at him knowing how disappointed he probably was?
He’d probably kissed thousands… and he was my only one.
Giving up, he stopped tugging, allowing me to cling. Rubbing his palm up and down my back, his hoarse, deepened voice echoed beside my ear. “Not bad at all, puppy. You were perfect. So much emotion packed into your small body.”
Gasping, I sprang back to glare. “I am not small!”
His lips twitched. They were kind of puffy, and I was the reason why.
I want to kiss him again.
I wanted to know if it would feel the same a second time or if it had been like that because it was my first.
“You are compared to me.”
My face twisted up, and I started to wiggle out of his lap. I wouldn’t sit here wanting to kiss him again while he insulted me!
Grasping my hips, his fingers dug in, locking me in place. Look, I might be smaller than him, but I grew up on the streets. I knew how to take care of myself.
Most of the time.
I was about to go all kung-fu ninja on him when he spoke.
“Is that all you just heard? Me saying you were small? Didn’t you hear anything else?”
I stilled, meeting his eyes, which I realized were kind of hazy.
You were perfect.
He liked my kissing.
“Kiss me again,” I demanded.
Rising off the back of the sofa, his chest collided with mine, fingers sliding into my hair to tug me into a searing kiss.
He wasn’t as cajoling as the first time. He didn’t ease into it at all, instead attacking at once and dragging me under.
We kissed for an undetermined amount of time, his fingers kneading my scalp, my entire body quaking at the way he consumed me until I had to break free, collapsing against his shoulder to raggedly draw in air.
Oh shit. It wasn’t like the first time. It was better.
The only thing that kept me from running was the fact that Ethan’s chest rose and fell as rapidly as mine, proving I wasn’t the only one affected.
Fine. It was that and the fact that my legs were shaking.
We stayed like that, with me in his lap, cheek on his shoulder, until our breaths quieted and a coherent thought could be formed in my head. By then, I’d turned languid, my body completely relaxing into his.
With a small sound, I turned into his neck again, tucking closer to inhale his savory scent. Strong arms came around me, and his fingers began to play in the hair at my neck.
My eyelids began to droop, lips parting limply against his skin.
The soft, steady rise and fall of his chest against mine was like a lullaby, and after those kisses, every part of me was lethargic.
Feeling safer than I had in a very long time, my consciousness gave way to sleep.
11
Ethan
* * *
Incredulously endeared.
That was how I would describe the emotions literally pummeling me as I sat squished into this couch with Fletcher slumbering in my lap.
I had kissed him, and he fell asleep.
How should one take this?
Should I be offended and worried my kisses were so droll? Or should I feel smug and proud of myself for kissing the consciousness right out of him?
I mean, obviously, we all know which one it was.
I’m far from droll.
Also, I’d like to note that for as small as I said he was, my legs were starting to fall asleep.
Despite the prickling, needly sensation running along my calves and across my feet, I laughed lightly, gathering him even closer, adjusting to make sure he was comfortable.
I didn’t believe in love at first sight. I never had. The way I grew up, there was no room in my life for such a notion. It was impractical, silly, and frankly dangerous.
I still didn’t believe in love at first sight. I hadn’t fallen head over heels for Fletch the day he tripped into my arms in the hospital room. Or when he hid behind a curtain, thinking no one could see him while the sound of his sniffling filled the room.
I wasn’
t in love with him when I sent an offer over to Ivory for him to play violin or in the park when I heard him play, not even when I fetched him from jail.
I’ll admit I was tumbling… sliding into territory where my heart would be claimed.
But then I kissed him.
The awe in his stare and the undeniable euphoria I felt when he finally kissed back—well, I wasn’t tumbling anymore.
And now here I sat, utterly lost.
No longer just enchanted.
Completely in love.
So… love at first kiss?
Was that a thing? My heart would argue to the death it was.
Seriously, I’m really good at arguing.
I really hadn’t meant to kiss him. I mean, I’d told myself, what, an hour before that I would wait. I couldn’t resist. I wanted to fill my hands with him desperately, taste him endlessly… quiet whatever it was that tormented him.
We were completely opposite and from two different worlds. The only thing we had in common was our gender, and honestly, that should also work against us.
Impossibly, none of it mattered because here he was, curled up in my lap, his soft breath brushing against my neck and his arm curled around me.
Tenderness rose up, a fragile feeling that oddly gave me strength. I knew this boy sleeping on my chest was actually a man. I knew he’d already lived a life that would harden or break most. Somehow, someway, he’d managed to still hold some innocence, to be pure in his deepest depths.
I wanted to protect that. Protect him.
Shifting, he sighed softly, nuzzling against my skin. Butterflies took flight in my stomach, making me feel like I’d had far too many espressos and not enough food. Chest tight, heart swollen, I gazed down, pressing a light kiss to his messy, too-long hair.
What am I going to do with you?
I’d barely had the thought before I was so rudely interrupted.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
The loud, thumping knocks echoed through the quiet apartment.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
Tensing, I glanced over the back of the sofa toward the entryway. No one ever just came by unannounced. It was common courtesy to call first.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
And did that person not see the doorbell? Great gods, were they trying to break down the door?
More loud banging, and Fletcher let out a low whine.
Anger turned my eyes to slits, but my movements remained gentle and unhurried when I stood, wincing at the pain as the blood flow returned to my legs.
Leaning down, I laid Fletcher on the cushions, heart constricting when his fingers tightened around me as if he didn’t want to let go.
Snagging up a blanket I’d never actually used but only draped around for show, I arranged it over him, tucking it up to his chin.
Bang! Bang! Bang!
I gave him a lingering glance, worried the loud racket would wake him, but he just settled farther into the blanket and kept sleeping.
Stalking through the apartment, I went to the door, which was rattling once more under the assault of my uninvited guest. Irritation coursed through my veins.
The whole frame shuddered when I yanked it open, scowling menacingly at the man who stood, fist still raised on the other side.
“What took you so long to answer?” Neo scowled, dropping his hand.
“You come to my house and beat on the door like a caveman and then scold me?” I retorted, crossing my arms over my chest in challenge.
“Where’s Fletch?” he demanded, not even apologizing for this foul and very loud behavior.
He shouldered past me but didn’t get very far because of the hand I slapped onto his shoulder, halting his progress.
He glanced at my hand and then at my face. I lifted an eyebrow, daring him.
“Fletch!” he yelled, his voice echoing through the entryway.
“Would you be quiet?” I growled. “You’ll wake him!”
“He’s asleep?” Neo asked, dark eyes disbelieving, entire face suspicious.
Lifting my hand, I gestured for him to see for himself. His plaid-covered back disappeared around the corner, the black boots he wore echoing on the tile.
When I stepped into the room, he looked up from beside the couch, eyes turning into half-moon shapes. “What did you do to him?” he whisper-yelled.
I had a momentary flashback of the kisses we shared, and awareness tingled my core. Clearing my throat, I answered, “I didn’t do anything. He’s exhausted. He fell asleep.”
“Ivory should have dragged him home with her, but she’s too nice for that. I’m here now, and he’s coming with me,” Neo said, leaning down to pull the blanket away and rouse him.
“Don’t even think about touching him,” I growled darkly.
Pausing, Neo looked up. “Excuse me?”
Going around the couch, I grabbed him, pulling him away. “He’s had a long day.”
“That’s exactly why I’m taking him home,” Neo muttered. “I should have been there.”
For the first time since he’d started beating on my door, the anger burning inside me reduced to a small flame. He was worried because he cared. I wanted Fletcher to have people who cared around him.
“I want to talk to you,” I said, keeping my voice low and even.
Neo’s dark head rose. “About what?”
I hitched my chin at the boy snoozing on the couch. “Him.”
“Ivory already told me what happened at the station.”
“It’s not about that.”
Curiosity shone in his eyes, and he nodded once. I motioned for him to follow me into the kitchen, not wanting to disturb Fletcher.
The penthouse was pretty open, so I could still see into the living room from the kitchen, but there was enough distance that hopefully, if we spoke quietly, our voices wouldn’t carry.
“Do you want something to drink?” I offered.
Despite the unwelcome greeting we had, I actually liked Neo. I thought he was a pretty decent guy, especially considering he was from the Grimms. He made Ivory very happy, and for that, I was willing to make allowances.
But now there was Fletcher. Fletch considered Neo his brother, and that meant now it was more important than ever we get along.
“Only if you have beer,” Neo said, the first hint of weariness in his voice as he dropped onto one of the stools at the island.
Going past him, I pulled open the wide stainless-steel fridge, taking out a beer. Neo raised his brows in surprise when I carried it over, sliding it in front of him.
“Just because I drink wine and scotch at parties doesn’t mean I don’t like a good beer,” I informed him, grabbing a bottle opener and handing it over.
“Touché,” Neo quipped, opening the beer to take a long pull. When he was done, he lowered the longneck to eye the label. “This is pretty good.”
“It’s from a brewery upstate.”
He grunted. “You gonna have one?”
My eyes strayed back into the living room. “Not tonight.”
Shrugging, the scruffy-jawed man took another long drink.
“Long day?” I asked, then remembered he was with his sister. “How is Virginia?”
“She’s okay,” he replied, setting the bottle in front of him. “Just a lot of doctor appointments and shit to see if we can do the surgery.”
I nodded. Virginia was a beautiful young woman who was dealt a bad hand in life when an accident left her wheelchair-bound and unable to walk. Before meeting Ivory, Neo spent all of his time caring for her, making sure she had what she needed. Now that he was with Ivory, doors had been opened that were never open before, and there was a chance Virginia could walk again.
“If there is anything you need, anything at all, just say the word,” I offered sincerely. Even if I wasn’t in love with Fletcher, I would still mean every word.
“Thank you,” Neo said, accepting the offer. He was an extremely proud man and didn’t accept much for himself, but when it came to Virg
inia, he would do anything.
A few beats of silence passed, another drink of the beer.
“Why did you bring Fletcher here tonight?” Neo asked, not mincing words.
“I have a contract he needs to sign.”
His smile was more like a smirk. “This isn’t about a contract.”
“You’re right. It’s not.” If he wasn’t going to mince words, then why should I?
Neo pinned me with a solid, penetrating stare from across the island. “Are you interested in Fletcher?”
“Yes.”
He might have suspected, but my blunt truth caught him off guard. I watched his tongue slide over his teeth and the muscle in his jaw jump. When he looked up, his nearly black eyes were intense. “Fletcher is not a toy. He’s not someone you can play with until you’re bored or your rich eye finds something shinier.”
“It’s insulting you would insinuate Fletcher isn’t better than that.”
“That’s exactly why I’m saying it. He is better.”
“Fletcher isn’t a game to me. Far from it.”
“Then what is he to you exactly?”
“I think he has the right to hear that first, don’t you?”
“So you haven’t told him?”
I considered that. I mean, technically, I hadn’t said the words, but my tongue did do some talking. “Not exactly.” I hedged.
Whatever Neo saw on my face or heard in my short reply ruffled his already ruffled feathers. Pushing up so fast the stool he was on made a screeching sound across the floor, he planted both hands on the island as he leaned in, anger making his jaw look like granite. “So help me God, if you touch him…”
I wasn’t about to tell him I already had and would again.
Not because I was afraid but because it was private. Admitting I was interested in Fletch was more than bold enough, at least for me and at least for right now.
“Actually, that’s sort of what I wanted to ask about.” I deflected.
Making a face, Neo grabbed his stool, dragging it under him once more.
Wincing at the noise he kept making, I shot a look in the direction of the couch. “Would you be quiet? Good Lord, you could wake the dead.”
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