(36) Full circle moment: back at TCAs but having a good time!
(37) Definitely enjoying it all more.
(38) Yes, yes, yes.
Acknowledgments
So many hands, so much help. In so many ways, so many people were of invaluable assistance to me both with this book and with the eighteen months or so that preceded this book.
There aren’t enough words to adequately express my gratitude. All I can say is that I hope and pray that each one of you can grab an apple box, go stand tall in the sun and then, in full view of the world, power pose like crazy. For each of you is a true superhero. You may not have saved the world but you did save my world.
Thank you:
My lit agent, Jennifer Joel at ICM, is the one who told me that my crazy personal experiment saying Yes to everything should be a book and then patiently dropped the breadcrumbs that led this crazy brain to the finish line. Marysue Rucci at Simon & Schuster hired me to write a book on motherhood and then when I discovered that I didn’t want to write that book, gamely allowed me to write this book instead. I’m delighted, expanded and changed by the experience of working with her and with Jenn. That is my definition of dream job.
My TV agent, Chris Silbermann at ICM, was supportive and, instead of reminding me that I already have too many jobs and too many kids to add anything else to my plate, acted as my personal gladiator at all times. Michael Gendler is the legal brain who makes all things possible. Chris DiIorio at PMK-BNC continues his Sisyphean effort to roll the stone that is me up that hill and not once has he put my head in a box or made a suit out of my skin. Not one minute of this journey into the public eye would have been possible without him.
Ilee and Vera Rhimes are my parents. They made me. They shaped me and molded me. They endlessly indulged my need to discuss my “plan for my future” and they applauded my ambitions. My father told me “the only limit to your success is your own imagination” and my mother fixed, handled and Poped anyone who tried to make me feel this was not true. They were my very first gladiators. Every child should be raised with the same encouragement and fierce protection.
As a whole, my brothers and sisters are great people. In particular, my sister Sandie Bailey has more talents, skills and gifts than anyone I’ve ever known. That she uses many of them to make my life better is beyond wonderful. That she will tuck a baby under her arm at a moment’s notice so I can write makes her awe-inspiring. That she will fiercely protect me when she thinks I can’t see her and mock me to my face at the first sign of my self-absorption makes her perfect. That we share our singular experience of childhood together is something I would not trade for the world.
The contents of this book should make clear why I owe my sister Delorse Bond a debt of gratitude. But know that what I’ve told you about her in these pages is only the tip of a very large iceberg. If I told you everything she’s done for me, it would take volumes. So I will just tell you that I know Delorse to be weird and wonderful and old-fashioned and nerdy and hilarious and soulful and selfless and amazing and only she will understand the depth of compliment when I say she has been for me both a Slayer and a Time Lord: I am defended.
Christopher Thoms is my brother from another mother. Adding him to my family was the best thing I’ve ever done. Our lives may change but our Cashio Street lives on.
I have three children whom I love more than anything. So I could never run Shondaland or write this book without real help at home. If I tried, we would starve and roll around in filth like pigs. In order to do what I do, I have a village of powerful, kickass working women who make my house a home. So I thank Mirtha Ross, Kelly Cheever, Ula Hrynhok, Cassidy Brown, Taylor Thompson, Calais Brown. And I’ll say it again: Jenny McCarthy is my everything. These women save me, and while I was writing this book they sustained me in ways I could not have dreamed.
Harper, Emerson and Beckett are quite simply the greatest, best, most special and talented, brilliant, beautiful children. No other children compare. Every single thing they do, say and are is perfect—even when it is not. They are unfolding exactly as they should and they are a constant reminder to stop and play.
Cassidy Brown read the manuscript as it came out of the printer chapter by chapter and encouraged me. Erin Cancino and Alison Eakle read the completed manuscript before anyone else and took the opportunity to tell me in detail what sucked. An honest opinion is priceless. That all three women gave theirs fearlessly restores my faith in humanity.
Abby Chambers listened to me read aloud as I typed and Zola, Gordon and Scott listened to me fret over drinks. My amazing team of assistants—Abby, Erin, Lense, Matt—kept me sane, fed and moving forward. My favorite Teamster, Mike Reynolds, parked on many a quiet side street and refused to divulge my location so I could write in peace from the back seat of the car.
Betsy Beers defies discussion. I would need to write a book about her many awesome ways. She, Pete Nowalk and every single member of my Grey’s Anatomy family, my Scandal family, my How to Get Away with Murder family and my larger Shondaland family are gifted, enthusiastic and joyful. They make me want to go to work.
The writers in the Shondaland Writers’ Rooms have provided me with camaraderie, solace, magic, intelligence, fun, baked goods, tap class, “Love, Joan,” the emergency story rule (when in doubt, go vampire), gossip, arts and crafts, war stories, Scotch Tuesdays/Wine Fridays/Margarita Mondays and a whole world of incredible creative talent. Track would never be laid without them.
Linda Lowy has made my world better and more creative with her casting. I have so much gratitude for every single actor she’s discovered and placed in front of me. For this book, I thank her most mightily for bringing Sandra Oh into my orbit.
Everyone at ABC and ABC Studios was as gracious, lovely and supportive during this book process as they have always been. They continue to make their studio a wonderful place to call home.
There are two guys deep inside Apple somewhere with very soothing phone voices who saved this manuscript and kept me from throwing myself into the ocean after I spilled a bottle of water on my MacBook Pro while writing. Thank you, Stuart and Jason, wherever you are.
Dana Asher, Cathy Highland, Verlyn Antoine are my glam team. They make me look and feel beautiful. More than that, they bring out a better me than I knew existed. I am grateful for them on a daily basis. Remember that the only reason I ever look like this when you see me is because THREE people worked a minimum of TWO AND A HALF HOURS (plus shopping, fitting, tailoring the clothes) on me. I did not wake up like this.
Eva Cwynar, MD, saved my life and became my friend. Your determination and belief and encouragement were and continue to be invaluable to me. There are no words to say thank you.
Gordon James, Zola Mashariki and Scott Brown are extraordinary individuals. They have rallied around me in ways I did not know possible and they taught me to redefine my idea of real friendship. The no-judgments, truth-telling, HTH nature of our fierce, dream-filled little gang of Bonnies and Clydes feels limitless. All obstacles are surmountable, every hill can be conquered. The paintings they have hung on my walls are some of the best: the dance lessons in Edgartown, the emergency Cabotties in the TV room, the Soho House brunches, the BYOB (bring your own baby) Sundays, the amazing conversations, the revelations, the fun, the fun, the fun . . . Delorse inspired me to begin but these three refused to let me quit. The road we travel together is pure hard-core Ride or Die all the way.
When I told Sandra Oh I wrote this book, I talked about overcoming the fear of speaking up for myself. She nodded because she knew how it had been for me. But still she looked puzzled.
“What,” she finally asked, “did you do with something if you were too afraid to say it before your Year of Yes?”
I stared at her a long beat. “Sandra,” I said slowly, “YOU said it for me.”
Sandra blinked. “Oh. Oh! Oh, right, oh my god.”
We keep surprising each other with revelations. Sandra created a character with me th
at changed both of our lives forever in ways we are still continuing to discover. To process. To recover from. I don’t think Sandra and I will ever fully understand the impact we have had on each other. The two of us are halves of one fiction and the sum of one experience. I thank her for joining me on this journey—sometimes painful, sometimes beautiful. Always educational. Forever freeing.
Cristina Yang made me brave. I thank her for appearing out of the ether.
Finally, to anyone out there who has watched any one of my shows and enjoyed it—even one episode, even one time—I am beyond grateful. It means that, at least once, I did something right.
You must do the things you think you cannot do.
—ELEANOR ROOSEVELT
About the Author
Shonda Rhimes is the critically acclaimed and award-winning creator and executive producer of the hit television series Grey’s Anatomy, Private Practice and Scandal, and the executive director of How to Get Away with Murder. Her writing credits also include Princess Diaries 2: A Royal Engagement, Crossroads and Introducing Dorothy Dandridge. Rhimes holds a BA in English Literature with Creative Writing from Dartmouth College and an MFA from the USC School of Cinema-Television as well as honorary PhDs from both institutions. Rhimes has twice been included in TIME magazine’s list of The 100 Most Influential People along with Fortune magazine’s 50 Most Powerful Women in Business, Variety’s Power of Women and Glamour magazine’s Women of the Year. In 2013, Rhimes was appointed by President Obama to serve as trustee for the John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts.
For her work on Grey’s Anatomy, Rhimes received the 2007 Television Producer of the Year Award by the Producers Guild of America, the 2007 Golden Globe Award for Outstanding Television Drama, the 2007 Lucy Award for Excellence in Television from Women in Film, the 2006 Writers Guild Award for Best New Series, in addition to Emmy nominations for Outstanding Drama Series and Writing for a Drama Series. For Scandal, Rhimes was the 2013 winner of the prestigious Peabody Award. Rhimes was the recipient of the 2012 GLAAD Golden Gate Award, the 2010 RAINN Hope Award and the 2010 and 2011 Television Academy Honors Awards. Rhimes was the 2005, 2013 and 2014 winner of the AFI Award for Television Program of the Year. In addition, Rhimes has won six NAACP Image Awards for Outstanding Writing in a Dramatic Series as well as eight NAACP Image Awards for Outstanding Drama Series.
In 2014, Rhimes and producing partner Betsy Beers received the Directors Guild of America’s prestigious Diversity Award. This marked only the fifth time the organization had bestowed this award. Rhimes was additionally a 2014 recipient of the W. E. B. Du Bois Medal from Harvard, the Sherry Lansing Leadership Award from The Hollywood Reporter and was named to both the 2014 New Establishment List for Vanity Fair and the New Guard List of 50 Most Connected Women in America for Marie Claire. In 2015, Rhimes was awarded the Paddy Chayefsky Laurel Award for Television Writing Achievement from the Writers Guild of America, West, and was inducted into the Broadcasting Hall of Fame by the National Association of Broadcasters. She was also bestowed the Eleanor Roosevelt Global Women’s Rights Award from the Feminist Majority Foundation in recognition of her work in changing the face of media.
Born and raised in Chicago, IL, Rhimes now lives in Shondaland, a very real and very imagined place that could be somewhere inside Los Angeles. She’s the proud mother of three daughters.
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Photo Credits
Courtesy of Shonda Rhimes: 6, 7, 10, 17, 21, 30, 31, 32, 33; Courtesy of the Rhimes Family: 1, 2, 3, 4, 13; Ilee Rhimes: 5; ABC/Randy Holmes: 8, 9; Getty Images/Frederick M. Brown: 11, 24; Getty Images/Alberto E. Rodriguez: 12; Dartmouth College/Eli Burakian: 14, 15, 16; Delorse Bond: 18; ABC/ Craig Sjodin: 19; ABC/ Danny Feld: 20; Wayne Tarr Studio of Photography: 22, 23, 29; Owen Kolasinski/BFAnyc/Sipa USA (Sipa via AP Images): 25; Courtesy of Ike Barinholtz: 26; Vince Bucci: 27; Gordon James: 28; ABC: 34, 35; Getty Images/Jason LaVeris: 36; Mathieu Young: 37; James White: 38
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Some names and identifying characteristics have been changed, and some individuals are portrayed as composites. The timeline of certain events has been altered, with some events reordered, combined and/or compressed. The author is neither truly old nor is she truly a liar.
Quotations from Grey’s Anatomy and Private Practice courtesy of ABC Studios.
Copyright © 2015 by Ships At A Distance, Inc.
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First Simon & Schuster hardcover edition November 2015
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Rhimes, Shonda.
Year of yes / Shonda Rhimes. — First Simon & Schuster hardcover edition November 2015
pages cm
1. Rhimes, Shonda. 2. Television writers—United States—Biography. I. Title.
PN1992.4.R515A3 2015
808.2'25—dc23
[B] 2015035684
ISBN 978-1-4767-7709-2
ISBN 978-1-4767-7714-6 (ebook)
Year of Yes Page 22