by Harlow James
“Yeah. I’ve grown up watching sports my entire life, especially baseball. If I could do PR and marketing for a baseball team, I think I’d be complete,” I joke, but my dream is real. The composure I get watching baseball and immersing myself in the sport is more than just a craving I feel for the game. It’s a passion that’s a part of me, and I would love to turn that into a career.
“I think you would be amazing at that, babe. I’ve seen what you’ve done with the social media for the gym, and you said so yourself last week that membership is up thanks to ads you’ve run and the publicity you’ve done in the community. You have a knack for getting people’s attention, that’s for sure.”
“Oh, yeah… well… not all attention is good attention, Jake.”
I don’t want to bring up the media again, but tonight scared me more than I care to admit.
“You got my attention, babe, just by sitting in the stands. I think it’s safe to say that was worthwhile.”
“Yes, Jake. I have no regrets about that. But tonight was scary… the reporters and photographers followed us to the restaurant and bombarded us when we left. Conner got hit in the face by a camera.”
“Fuck,” he curses into the phone. “I’m so sorry, Dani. Is he okay?”
“Yeah, just a bruise, but the crowds are just getting worse. It seems the better you play, the more interest they have on our relationship.”
“Are you saying this is my fault?” He asks defensively, which makes my anger rise instantly.
“No, of course not! I’m just saying, it’s a lot to take in!”
He lets out a deep breath. “Shit, I’m sorry. It’s been a long day and I didn’t mean to snap at you. I hate feeling helpless like this, Dani. I want so badly to get rid of them, but there’s nothing I can do. I want to keep you, Conner, and Gramps safe, but I can’t when I travel like I do.”
“I know, Jake. I’m sorry to make you feel guilty. Besides that though, the day was wonderful.”
“Fuck, I wish I could kiss you and hold you right now.” I can hear the pain in his voice, his lack of control evident in his frustration.
“Me too. But I’ll see you in a few days, right?”
“Yes. I’m counting down the minutes.”
“Okay, well I’m exhausted. I’ll talk to you tomorrow, Jake.”
“Okay, babe. Goodnight, and sweet dreams, my girl.”
“Goodnight.”
I hang up with Jake, feeling more uneasy than I did before he called. I care for him so much, that my heart aches when we’re apart. But I remind myself that this is what I signed up for when I agreed to go out with him. And I feel myself falling in love with him the more time we spend together. But is it enough?
Chapter 25
Jake
“It’s nice to have you over for dinner, son,” Danielle’s grandpa says to me as we fire up the barbeque to cook dinner.
It’s Danielle’s birthday, just two weeks after her graduation---the night our relationship shifted.
I’ve tried to convince myself it’s all in my head, but I feel like she’s pulling away from me, much like my nightmares have been warning me that she would.
I asked her what she wanted to do to celebrate the big 2-3, offering to take her out to a romantic dinner or stay overnight in a hotel near the beach. She declined every idea though, stating she’d rather have dinner at her house with her family and Lochlin, instead of going out. She said she didn’t want me to go to the trouble, but deep down, I knew she didn’t want to go out in public with me.
My job, my career as a baseball player, is slowly putting a wedge between me and the girl I feel I’m meant to be with. I want to believe we can get past this, but my chest is tight and I feel like I’m walking on eggshells whenever a picture of us surfaces or either of us is bombarded by reporters when we’re out and about.
Danielle says a group of photographers has set up camp at the gym, waiting for her each day when she clocks in and out. She’s been bothered in the grocery store and even at the hair salon. Conner and Gramps have had a few issues too, but nothing like what she’s experienced.
I can’t go anywhere without being questioned too, especially when we’re together. We tried going to the movies, thinking the darkness would keep us safe---but by the time we left, the street outside was swarming with photographers.
“I’m glad to be here,” I respond to Gramps after I push my anxiety down, shifting my insecurities and doubts to the side so I can be present in our conversation.
“How are things with you and Dani?” He asks me not so subtly, prying for information that Danielle probably hasn’t shared.
“Good, sir. I care about her a lot. I hope you know that.”
He nods. “I do. I can see it on your face… you’re in love with her, aren’t you?”
I swallow hard when I realize even her grandpa can see how I feel. Rocky’s been pressuring me to tell her when I told him my fears about her pulling away. Brandon calls me “sunshine” now, claiming the sun looks like it’s shining out of my ass every morning I come in after rolling around in bed with Dani the night before.
But I haven’t told her yet.
It’s only been a little over two months since our first encounter occurred at the stadium, and two months exactly since I contacted her the first time. I plan to remind her about that later, hoping to score some brownie points. But I’m scared---terrified that if I say the words out loud and she leaves me, I’ll never recover.
“I do, sir. But I haven’t told her yet.”
“Well, what are you waiting for, son? You’re not gonna live forever! Trust me,” he winks as he places the burgers on the grill, seasoning the meat with an assortment of spices.
“Can I ask you something?” I figure since he’s been forward, I can too.
“Of course,” he replies as we take a seat in the chairs at the patio table. The stained deck of their patio opens up to a quaint backyard covered in grass and shrubs and mature trees line the furthers edge of the fence. Gramps obviously takes pride in his plants.
“Has Danielle said anything to you about being scared to be with me?”
Gramps stares me down, taking his time in answering me.
“Not exactly, no. But I can see it on her face. The media scares her, Jake. She wants to protect herself and us, but she needs to realize that she can’t protect everyone.”
I nod in agreement. The same holds true for me. I want to protect her from everything, but I can’t.
“I get it. Believe me, I do. I just don’t want to lose her because living in my world is too hard.”
Gramps takes a swig of his beer before he turns to me.
“You two are meant for each other. I can see it on both of your faces when you’re together. Regardless of what happens, even if she runs… you need to trust your path, son.”
Trust your path.
I’ve heard Dani say those words several times before, particularly on our first date.
“Trust our path?” I ask, needing more clarification.
“Danielle has experienced a lot of loss and sadness in her life, and it’s difficult to carry on after big life changes like she’s undergone. When I lost my wife, I didn’t know if I could move one without her, but I managed. And then when I lost my son…” he chokes up as he fights back his tears, “I realized that my purpose for still being here was to raise those two kids in there,” he gestures over his shoulder with his thumb.
“I trusted the path that God put me on, and you need to do the same. You and Dani are meant to be, whether that’s today, or years from now.” He pauses and then enunciates the next three words, pointing a finger at my chest.
“Trust. Your. Path.” He gives me one simple nod before grabbing his beer and walking back over to the barbeque.
Well, shit. Nothing like some life advice from a respectable man to put you in your place at an afternoon barbeque.
I clear the emotion from my throat and stand, eager to find Danielle.
&n
bsp; “And Jake,” he calls after me as I start to walk away. “When the day comes for you to ask her to marry you, you have my blessing. Who knows if I’ll be around by then,” he winks at me as I flash him a grin.
“Thanks, Gramps. That means a lot.”
“Please, call me William.”
“William,” I nod at him before turning and walking into the house. I need to see my girl.
Chapter 26
Dani
I’m in the kitchen, slicing onions and tomatoes for the burgers, when Jakes stumbles through the back door from outside, strolling over to where I’m standing and wrapping his arms around me from behind.
“Happy birthday, baby,” he whispers in my ear before inhaling my scent deeply. I love the feeling of being enveloped in his arms. When he holds me, I feel like nothing can penetrate our bubble. I’m safe, and Jake will fight off my demons.
And then when he releases his grip on me, my vulnerability returns. I know he’s still here, but the next day he won’t be. The fact that he had my birthday as one of his full days off during the season was a miracle in itself.
“Thank you,” I smile up at him, trying to play off my doubts that have been ravaging my brain for the past few weeks.
“You okay?” He asks, full of concern---his usual tone around me lately. I swear he knows something is wrong, but he won’t just come out and say it. We’re tip-toeing around each other, waiting for the pin to drop.
“I’m great! This is exactly what I wanted.” I answer a little too enthusiastically, garnering me an eyebrow raise from Jake.
“Lochlin should be here any minute. How are the burgers doing?”
“Great. Gramps put them on a few minutes ago. They shouldn’t take too long.”
“Perfect. I just need to peel some lettuce, and we should be all set in here too. Did you two find something to talk about?” I ask curiously, needing to know that Gramps didn’t drill Jake for information, or vice versa. It does mean a lot to me that they get along though, seeing as how Gramps is the closest thing I have to a father now.
“The man sure can talk about baseball,” Jake replies, avoiding meeting my eyes. I have a feeling he’s lying, but it’s sweet that he thinks I can’t tell.
“Oh, yes he can.” I laugh while placing the sliced veggies and pasta salad on the table. I grab the condiments from the fridge and the buns, making sure everything is in place.
“Where’s the birthday girl?!” Lochlin shouts from the front door where she’s let herself in. This is practically her second home, so it doesn’t bother anyone.
“Here I am!” I shout back at her, waving my hands in the air while running to give her a hug. We’ve given the same greeting to each other on our birthdays since we were kids.
We hug in a fit of giggles as she hands me my present, my hands tearing open the Victoria’s Secret bag in a hurry. I pull out an assortment of underwear and a new set of pajamas as I turn to see a mile-wide smile on Jake’s face.
“I approve, Lochlin,” he teases as he kisses me on the cheek and retreats outside to check on Gramps and the burgers.
“How’s it going with Jake?” Lochlin questions as we make our way back into the kitchen. I’ve been completely honest with her about my confliction regarding our relationship lately.
“When we’re alone and there are no cameras and reporters, it’s amazing. But then we step outside and one encounter makes me feel like we take three steps backward.”
She sighs. “I’m sorry, Dani. I know this is hard, but you love him, right?”
I nod. I do. I’ve known for a while that I’m in love with him, but the thought of my life being like this forever is downright terrifying.
“Yes,” I whisper, afraid to utter the words out loud.
“Then just keeping taking it one day at a time and you’ll figure out what’s right,” she smiles at me and then changes the subject to tell me about her new boy-toy she found at the gym.
Trust my path, I remind myself as the boys come inside with the burgers and Conner joins us from upstairs. We commence eating and drinking and celebrating my birthday in peace… just the way I wanted it.
“Are you ready to go?” Jake comes up from behind me from where he was sitting on the couch, watching a baseball game with Gramps and Conner after we ate. I was putting away the remaining cake and ice cream we devoured before Lochlin had left a few minutes ago.
“Yes,” I say as I turn to him and take in his handsomeness. He ditched his hat today and styled his hair, his scruff on his face short but soft, just the way I like it. I reach out to run my fingers through his dirty blonde hair, pulling his head down to me for a sweet but heated kiss.
“Let me grab my bag,” I whisper before I run upstairs to my room and return just as quickly.
“Alright boys, I’m staying over at Jake’s tonight,” I announce, but neither Gramps nor Conner turn their heads from the TV. I look over to see Jake just as enthralled in the game again.
“Boys!” I shout, their heads spinning this time from the sheer volume of my voice.
“Jake and I are leaving,” I state normally as Gramps and Conner both stand from the couch and give me a hug and kiss and last-minute birthday wishes.
Jake walks me to his truck where we buckle up and drive to his condo.
Once inside, he takes my hand and leads me to his room, never speaking but caressing my fingers as we walk. Each time he leads me in his house, I feel anxious for how and when he’s going to pounce. Jake like to take the lead, and I am all for it.
When he opens the door, I’m granted the vision of white rose petals sprinkled all over his bed and a small black box sitting in the center.
“Jake,” I whisper as I take in the battery-operated tea light candles he has situated throughout the room as well.
“Hey, I’m glad those things stayed on all this time,” he declares, which makes me chuckle.
“Smarter than actual flames, yeah?”
He smiles at me before grabbing my hand again and leading me to the bed.
“Happy birthday, baby,” he says as he hands me the box and we sit down next to each other, creasing the charcoal gray comforter on his neatly made bed. “And it’s been two months today since I reached out to you for the first time.”
“You didn’t have to do this, Jake,” I say as if the words are natural in a situation like this.
“Uh, yeah I did. You’re my girlfriend and it’s your birthday. You get presents… that’s how birthdays work.”
I roll my eyes at him as I lift the lid from the box and gasp at what I see.
“I know you never take off your necklace since your dad gave it to you…” he trails off as he reaches down and retrieves the gold bracelet from the box.
“So I figured I’d get you the matching bracelet so you could always wear something from me.”
I look up at him through the tears in my eyes, letting the first two fall as a few more follow.
Situated between the delicate gold chain attached at both ends is a compass that’s identical to the one on my necklace.
“Where did you find this?” I ask as he opens the clasp and places it around my wrist.
“Well, I actually had it made. Seeing as how this necklace was purchased ten years ago, it was impossible to find one that was identical. So I snapped a picture of it one morning while you were sleeping and had a jeweler recreate it. Do you like it?”
I can’t stop the tears now from flowing as Jake reaches up and wipes them from my face.
“I take that as a yes?”
I nod. “I love it,” I manage to grate out, while I spin the delicate chain around my wrist.
“It’s my second favorite gift I’ve ever received,” I shrug, knowing Jake won’t take offense to the fact that my necklace from my dad will always be number one.
“I’ll take it,” he breathes me in as he rests his forehead on mine. We stay like that for a while until I manage to compose myself.
After a trip to the bathroom
to assess the damage to my face from my cryfest, Jake pulls me into bed and makes love to me until we both shatter in ecstasy, wrapped up in each other for what feels like an eternity.
He doesn’t have to say the words. I know he loves me. I can feel it in the way he holds me and looks into my eyes. That same look from the first time we locked our gazes, but now it holds so much more meaning behind it.
I drift off to sleep, happy and in love, despite the turmoil rolling inside about the intrusion in my life.
But little did I know that just a few days later, my world would be turned upside once more.
Chapter 27
Dani
A few days after my birthday, I felt a little reprieve from the tension I’ve been carrying around in my chest. Jake and I have kept a low profile, both of us avoiding situations where reporters can catch us alone or together. I feel like I’m slowly starting to come to grips with the idea of dating someone famous, even though tonight is a home game where I know the cameras will watch our every move.
I leave the gym earlier than normal. Tina had no problem with it, given I’ve been putting in more time since I graduated and tonight Jake has a game. I arrive back at home with some time to spare before Gramps and I have to leave for the stadium. One of Conner’s friends decided to have a video game tournament at his house since they’re on summer vacation finally, so he opted to skip out on this game.
“Gramps, I’m home!” I shout as I walk through the door, placing my duffle bag on the floor by the coat closet.
“Hey, pretty girl,” he greets me as he rounds the corner from the kitchen, holding a glass of ice water. I watch him hobble slowly into the living room, his glasses resting on the end of his nose, grinning while admiring the way he still manages to strut through a room. Gramps was a handsome man in his prime and still exudes a level of confidence.
“Just the two of us tonight at the game,” I say, taking a seat on the well-worn couch next to my grandpa’s recliner, tucking my feet up under my legs on the cushion.