by BJ Harvey
“How about no, no, and no. It’s Gilly.”
It takes a moment to register, and when it does, I near-on fall to the floor. “Ronnie’s sister? You sly dog.” I may have said that a little louder than necessary, but whoa!
He narrows his eyes. “It’s not like that. It’s—”
“Complicated. You said that already.”
“It’s complicated because it’s not complicated. Does that make sense?”
“Not at all.”
“It’s easy. So damn easy. It’s a tap-’n’-gap with absolutely no emotion on either side. It’s purely physical. There’s nothing there except this insane chemistry that explodes behind closed doors.”
It’s crazy how parallel that is to what Skye and I have. Whenever we’re together, however great and easy it is, it’s like we both know there’s a fine line between what we have and complicated. I can’t put my finger on it—and I haven’t wanted to bring it up with her—but as great as Christmas was, the more people who know what we’re doing, the closer we get to crossing that line.
And my fear continues to grow because of it. Therefore, I’m firmly entrenched in the world of denial, and I’m happy to stay here. I’m not going to rock the boat or change anything about the relationship Skye and I have—that way, I know there’s no chance of blurring the line or erasing it completely.
“Earth to Co? Are you still with me?” Ezra asks.
“Sorry, I’m just… Gilly? How long has that been going on?
He shrugs. “Off and on, about eight months.”
My mouth drops open. And I thought two months of sneaking around was risky.
“Wow. Okay. So casual and nothing more?”
“Just sex, man. That’s it,” he says. The waitress arrives and slides two plates in front of us, both stacked high with all the good stuff. She blushes and hurries off, having obviously heard what Ez said.
I look down at the food. “Damn. You weren’t joking about getting the works.”
He grins, looking more at ease than I’ve seen him in a long time. “As I said, we have a big night. I figure we eat now, then start pre-gaming after you’ve slept. By the time we hit Throb, we’ll be at a good state of buzzed and ready for a good time. You only turn thirty once.”
I smile. “Last one to do it, too.”
Ez pretends to wipe away a tear. “I remember when you were young…”
I kick him under the table. “Quit it, Baker, and eat your breakfast.”
He gives me a mock salute. “Yes, sir. So damn bossy. Just because you’re finally out of Pampers.”
I snicker, shaking my head and stabbing my fork into a piece of bacon.
“Do you think I’m letting you get away with not talking about Skye? You know how this works. I showed you mine, now show me yours.” Dropping my bacon-laden utensil onto the plate, I go to stand, moving my hand to my belt with a smirk. Ezra rolls his eyes, but his grin gives him away.
“Avoidance,” he murmurs.
“Nope.”
“Okay, then. How long has it been going on?”
“Two months, give or take.”
His eyes widen. He nods and returns to his food. “And?” he asks, quirking a brow.
“And nothing. It’s the same as you. Friends with benefits.”
“She’s more than a friend though.”
”Yeah, we work together,” I deadpan.
He pins me with a stare. “Co…”
“What? The sex is great. The times we’re not having sex are great. It’s good.”
“She’s younger than you. Does she have stars in her eyes she wants to hook on to your moon?”
My head jerks back. “No. We promised each other no romantic feelings. No complications. We’re best friends who sleep and work together.”
“And spend Christmas together.”
“She needed me.”
“Or did you need to be there for her?” he asks.
“I—” He’s right. I didn’t even question what I was doing or why. I just knew I wanted to be there for her and help her through whatever it was that callout had triggered. It just happened to be Christmas Day.
A small smirk appears on Ez’s face. “Still saying there are no feelings there?”
“I’d do it for anyone. Why is everyone so fascinated with the fact I was there for a friend when she needed me?”
All humor leaves his expression. “Maybe we can see what you’re apparently blind to.”
“I’m not blind to anything. I’m shutting down any chance of either one of us ruining what we’ve got.”
“You sure about that?” he asks.
“Yes,” I say, sounding strong but not feeling confident. Dammit. Now I’m going to be psychoanalyzing everything like a damn moony teenager.
I point my fork at him. “Stop putting doubts in my head. Skye said sex is just sex. She’s the one who said it’s just a physical release.”
He purses his lips, his gaze studying me before he nods and returns to his breakfast. “Okay, then. Just know that people can say things and mean them, but situations change. People change, Co, and if you want my two cents’ worth—”
I smirk. “If I say no, are you gonna give it to me anyway?”
Ez chuckles. “Pretty much. I just don’t think anything between you two was ever going to be casual. There’s a reason why one-night stands with strangers are easy. Sleeping, working, and almost living with your best friend while staying platonic? Not so much.”
“Can we change the subject now?” I grumble around a mouthful of hash brown.
“Yep. If nothing else sinks in, just be aware that denial causes more problems than it solves.”
I nod, my mind now full.
“Let’s come up with a game plan for tonight. My boy is saying goodbye to his twenties. We need to make sure we do it in style.”
That makes me grin. “Now that I can get on board with.”
21
Cohen
After two beers and a tequila shot with the guys at Jamie’s house, I’m suitably buzzed ahead of what should be an awesome night seeing in the New Year and celebrating the death of my twenties.
I haven’t seen Skye all day. She replied to my text a few hours ago telling me she’d meet me at Throb with Val. And true to her word, when we arrive at the nightclub and hop out of the car, she’s standing just inside the door waiting for us.
“See you upstairs,” Ezra says, slapping me on the back and walking past us. Jax winks at me, Bryant and Faith have weird, knowing smiles on their faces, and Jamie and April disappear with Ez, leaving me speechless as I take in the breathtaking woman standing in front of me.
Her blonde hair is a sea of short wavy curls, her blue eyes popping, thanks in part to the stretched-tight, curve-hugging, navy, barely-there dress stopping mid-thigh and showing a hell of a lot of appreciated leg.
“Hi.” A small smile curves her lips. “Like what you see?” she asks, doing a twirl.
I look her up and down, losing all thought of where we are and who might see. I step forward and snake an arm around her waist, pressing her back against the wall, stealing a risky moment of privacy in a club full to the brim with people.
After running my other hand up the curves of her side, over the bright blue slinky fabric of her dress, I cup her jaw and dip my face so it’s almost touching hers.
“Are you my birthday present? Is this what I get to unwrap when I take you home and handcuff you to my bed?”
Her eyes flash, the heat and desire in them unmistakable. “The night is still young,” she purrs breathlessly.
“And there are a few private rooms upstairs I’m sure we can find a use for…” I murmur, lowering my lips to kiss her neck. “See the new year in with a big bang.”
She laughs soft and low, and I feel it in my dick like a hard stroke. I roll my hips, loving the moan that escapes her.
Her hands move to my chest, then slide up to my neck and around the back of my head. Her fingers tangle in my hair and t
ug it back so we’re nose to nose again.
“Behave, Cass. Our family and friends are upstairs waiting for you. I’ll give you a present you won’t ever forget later…” She wets her lips, her tongue grazing my mouth as she does it. “But for now—”
I cut her off, kissing her hard and deep and full of the promise of everything I want to do to her. My buzz has me forgetting where we are and anyone around us. When she grinds her hips against mine, I consider blowing off this party and everyone here and stealing Skye away for our own private celebration. She flexes her grip against my head and pulls us apart, her eyes glazed and hooded, a look that is fucking fantastic on her.
Her lips curve up into a salacious smile. “Later, Cass.”
I growl and step back, getting some much-needed space to calm my body down. Skye’s arms drop down to her sides. Her eyes shift over my shoulder and go wide. Her mouth drops open.
“Co,” Ez says, “unless you want to announce whatever this is to the world, you might want to cut it short and come with me. There’s a line of shots waiting at the bar with our names on them.”
Skye huffs out a breath and sighs, meeting my eyes. “I take it Ez knows then?” she asks, her lips twitching.
“Nah. I just thought Co was giving you an oral exam,” Ez deadpans.
“That comes later—if he can still stand up by the end of the night.”
“Something will be up,” I say, gruffly.
“Too much information, Co,” Ez says with a laugh. He wraps his arm around my shoulder. “See you up there, Skye.” He leads me away toward the stairs leading to the VIP level of the club. “You’re playing with fire.”
I turn his way. “Did you see that dress? I can’t be held responsible for my actions when she’s wearing something like that.”
“Good point, but maybe keep it in your pants unless you’re ready to admit it’s more than sex.”
“Just make sure I don’t do anything stupid and make sure no guy gets—”
“Happy birthday!”
I’m cut off by the loud chorus sung by the large group of our family and friends standing in a big semicircle, taking up the entire second level.
“Well shit,” I say with a laugh.
“Now behave. There’s time for trouble later,” Ez murmurs for my ears only before letting me go, his place taken by Mom, who wraps her arms around me.
“Thirty years ago, you were keeping me up all night,” she says with a sniffle.
I hug her and squeeze her tight. “Keep it together, Mom.”
She steps back and narrows her eyes. “Oh, hush. It’s not every day my baby turns thirty.”
I tilt my head. “Technically, that doesn’t happen till one-oh-seven a.m.”
“Love you, baby,” she says, kissing my cheek.
“You too, Mom.”
“Stop hogging him, Marce,” Dad says from her side. Mom steps back, and Dad wraps his arm around my shoulders, pulling me in for a man hug.
“Happy birthday, Co.”
“Thanks, Dad.”
“Now, there are a lot of people here to see you and celebrate. Make sure you don’t get waylaid at the door again,” he says with a wink. My mouth drops open. Well, shit. Ez was right. Seems the moment wasn’t as private as I’d thought.
I don’t get any time to think about that as for the next hour, I’m handed drink after drink, and I move around the floor, talking to everyone from my life who colluded to get me here for this surprise birthday celebration.
I catch glimpses of Skye, but Ezra is always close by her side, probably making sure I don’t do something stupid like mount her on the bar. Outing us and whatever arrangement we have is not a decision to be made without her agreement, and definitely not when I’m borderline drunk. But part of me suspects Skye might be avoiding me. That could also be the alcohol screwing with my head.
“Here,” Zach says, putting a glass of water in my hand. “If you want to see midnight, you need a few of these.”
I down it in one go. “Thanks.”
We move toward a big table where Dani, April, Ronnie, Faith, Abi, and her husband, Cade, are all sitting. Ronnie and Faith are our sober drivers tonight given they’re six and a half and five months pregnant respectively. That means they’re both in the glowing, crazy happy, rubbing-their-bumps-a-lot stage of pregnancy. It also means Jax and Bry—the twins who even managed to knock up their respective wives at the same time—are also always touching the growing bumps. Both of them.
“Hey,” I say, taking a seat and looking around the group. I may sway just a little bit, but I swear I’m not drunk—tipsy, maybe.
Abi shakes her head at me, leaning into Cade and giggling. “You’re toasted, little brother.”
“Am not,” I say, poking my tongue out, making the rest of them smile. “Besides, it’s my birthday.”
She shakes her head. “That’s tomorrow.”
“And I’m celebrating early. How are my girls?” I ask. Abi and Cade welcomed twins three months ago, joining my three-year-old nephew, Harry.
“They’re good but tiring,” Abi says, a soft smile appearing on her face.
“Time for another?” I tease.
Her eyes narrow, and she points her finger at me. “Take that back.”
I hold my hands up in surrender. “Okay. I’ll ask in another six months then?”
Cade shakes his head. “She’ll hurt you.”
I shrug and shoot them a grin. “Not on my birthday, she won’t. Birthday rules apply.”
“Cohen Patrick Cook, I’m warning you,” Abi says with a downright scary expression.
“Right. Full-naming me. Messaged received.” Deciding to leave that conversation alone, I turn to find Rhodes, Marco, Luca, and Gio have now joined the large group sitting along the side wall.
I look around the bar, trying to catch sight of Skye but not seeing her anywhere. I face back toward the guys. “Why are you here with all the married folk when you’re single, and there’s an entire floor of available women downstairs looking to start their New Year’s off right?”
They chuckle. “All in good time,” Marco says.
“Yeah. It’s the thrill of the chase. You can’t go straight for the prey. Then you miss out on the fun of playing with it for a while.”
I waggle my brows. “I thought the whole point was playing with the prize.”
“And this, my friends, is why our boy Cohen here is still single,” Marco announces to a round of laughs.
Feeling a little more clear-headed, I turn to Dani. We’re talking about the latest video game she’s working on when Jamie sidles up next to us.
“Jay!” I say, a little loudly.
“Come on, little brother. It’s almost midnight, and we’ve got to get you one last drink to ring in your dirty thirties.”
I push out my chair and follow him to the bar, finding Dad, Jax, Bry, and Ez waiting for us, all with a shot in hand with amber-colored liquor in it. Ezra passes two glasses over, and Jamie and I take one as the guys all move to stand in a circle.
Dad looks around the group, lifting his drink in the air, the rest of us following suit. “We’ve done this on everyone else’s thirtieth birthday, and now it’s Cohen’s turn. Co, all a father ever wants is for his children to grow up to be strong, successful adults who find their own way in the world. You’ve made your mother and me so proud over the years, and you continue to do so every day. Happy birthday.”
My chest grows tight at the sight of my father staring at me, nothing but pride and love shining in his glassy eyes. “To Co,” he says.
“To Co!” the guys reply. We all tap our glasses together then, with one last look, down the shot.
“Damn. What was that?” I ask, not expecting the acid-like burn.
Jamie shrugs. “I let Dad order them. Who the hell knows what it was.”
We place the empty glasses on top of the bar. Bryant looks at his watch. “Right. Now let’s get everyone together because it’s about five minutes to midnight,
and as much as I love you guys, I love my wife more, and I’d much rather kiss her than any of you.”
Glancing around the room, I search for Skye and her amazing dress. I find her and Val standing at the other end of the bar, talking to two young guys I don’t recognize. What the hell? She’s mine.
“I’ll be back,” I say to anyone nearby, making my way through the crowd, no longer seeing the blue of her dress and only seeing red.
“Co…” Ez says, tugging on my arm to stop me.
I shrug him off but know he’s right behind me. “I’m not going to make a scene.”
“Your body language and current level of drunkenness tell me otherwise, Co.”
I look over my shoulder and meet his eyes. “Then I’m lucky you’re going to distract everyone so I can get Skye all to myself. She’s been avoiding me all night, and I want to know why. If she wants to go home with someone else, then she can tell me to my face.”
He reaches for me again. “Co, this isn’t a good idea. Wait until tomorrow. Talk to her then.”
I shake my head and shrug his hand free. “Nope. It’s almost midnight, and if she’s going to be kissing anyone, it’s gonna be me.”
“Just friends, my ass,” he mutters.
“We are,” I say, moving past the last of the crowd. Skye’s eyes lock with mine, the smile on her lips morphing into a frown the closer I get.
“Hey, Val,” I say, walking past her and the two idiots thinking they have a chance with either of the Rossi girls, but especially Skye. I reach out and grab Skye’s hand and keep walking.
“Co!” Ezra calls out, but I don’t stop.
“Co, what are you doing?” Skye asks, running to keep up with me.
I don’t say anything. Instead, I keep walking down the hall to Sean’s office. I jiggle the door handle, shaking it a little too roughly when I find it locked.
Skye tugs on my hand, stopping me in my tracks. “Cass, it’s almost midnight. People will notice we’re gone.”
“I don’t care,” I say, my red now turning a shade of purple, frustration I’m suddenly all for working out of my system.
I push her up against the wall, no longer caring if anyone we know sees us.