Realizing their need to be alone, the old man didn’t follow for a while. Instead he sat on the bench, recovering from his own ordeal.
From behind him, the sound of the boy sobbing, and Liz’s gentle reassurance, even though her own heart was breaking, was something the old man would remember for the rest of his life.
Some time later, Liz came out to bring him inside. “Thank you, Jasper,” she said. “You’ve been a real friend to both of us.”
When they came into the kitchen, Jasper asked after the boy. “Will he be all right, d’yer think?”
She led him into the sitting room. “He’s more settled now, thanks to you.”
The old man was choked to see how the boy was fast asleep on the sofa. “It were a hard thing for him to find out,” he said as Liz quietly closed the door. “Look, lass, I’m sorry I had to bring such awful news.”
“In a way, I’m glad you did,” she said quietly. “You’ve answered so many of my questions. Robbie’s, too, though it’s all a bit too much for him right now.”
He understood what she meant. When he first set foot in this pretty place, there was an air of confusion and doubt, and a sense of deep unhappiness. Now it was as if the curtain of doubt and confusion had lifted. And yes, there was still unhappiness, but it would pass in the fullness of time; he knew that from experience.
“Will you stay a few more days, Jasper?”
“If you want me to, lass.”
“We both want you to.”
“Aye, well” – he gave her a wink – “it’ll give me time to build a new ladder. That one’s falling apart at the seams.”
She threw her arms around him. “Thank you.”
That was all she said.
But it was enough.
CHAPTER 12
IT HAD BEEN late when Kathy went to bed, having waved goodbye to Maggie earlier in the day, and since then she had hardly slept a full hour.
Now, at four o’clock in the morning, she was wide awake.
For a time she lay there, her head in the pillows and her arms flung out across the sheet. Pent-up and restless, she closed her eyes and tried to relax, but it was no use.
“Damn it!” Throwing off the bedclothes, she clambered out of bed and went to the window. Whenever she found it difficult to sleep, Kathy always went to look out of the window: there was something calming about seeing what was going on in the outside world; it seemed to focus the mind.
“I wonder if Dad used to stand by this window and look out?” she murmured, her eyes shifting to the photograph on her bedside cabinet. “I wonder if he ever got so churned up and worried that he couldn’t sleep?”
She thought about his double life, and imagined there must have been many a time when he was worried he might be found out, and that it would all cave in on him.
Suddenly, out of the corner of her eye, she thought she detected a movement down on the beach. A closer look and she recognized the shadowy figure. “Tom!” She glanced at the clock: it showed the time as ten past four. She wondered what he was doing down there at this time of morning, yet she wasn’t overly concerned, for hadn’t she seen him, time and again, strolling the beach, pausing every now and then to pick up a pebble or a shell? The old baccy jar on his mantelpiece was filled to the brim with them; he’d shown them to her one day when Jasper and she were visiting.
She watched him for a while, then shivered when the chill of early morning began to penetrate her bones. Returning to the bed, she collected her robe and threw it over her shoulders. By the time she got back to the window, he was gone. Saddened, she turned away. When a moment later she climbed into bed, Tom was strong in her mind.
Holding her father’s photograph, she opened her heart to him. “I know how you used to say that one day I’d find the right man. Well, now I think I have, but isn’t it strange how I had to come all this way to find him?”
She wagged a finger at him. “You knew, didn’t you?” she chided. “You bought this house for me, because you knew I would come here and there he would be.”
A sense of regret washed through her. “He’s going away, though. I don’t know when, but I do know it will be very soon.” In the circumstances she couldn’t blame him. “Maybe when he finds the person who murdered his family, he’ll be able to put it behind him, and there’ll be a chance for us.”
She smiled wistfully. “If you have any influence up there, see what you can do, will you?”
Growing serious, she confessed her innermost thoughts. “I love him, Dad. He’s the kindest, most wonderful man I’ve ever met.”
Replacing the photograph, she slid down in the bed, but there was no sleep in her. For a while, she was half tempted to go and find him, but common sense prevailed. She told herself that he might not thank her, that walking the beach in the dead of night when the world was sleeping was his way of clearing his mind. From what Tom had already confided, he needed to gather the strength and purpose to deal with what was potentially an explosive situation.
Fearful about the outcome of it all, she went downstairs, where she made herself a cup of cocoa and sat at the table, rolling the warm cup around in her hands and lazily sipping at the hot, frothy liquid.
After a time, when the warmth of the liquid dulled her senses and the sleep crept up on her, she climbed the stairs back to bed. Within an hour she was sound asleep.
It was Tom who woke her.
His persistent rat-tatting on the front door startled her.
In two minutes she was at the front door. “Who is it?”
“It’s me … Tom.”
Inching the door open, she was embarrassed to let him in, what with her hair uncombed and the sleep still in her eyes.
Tom thought she looked lovely. He liked the way her hair tumbled over her forehead, and that sleepy, childish look that made her seem vulnerable. “I wondered if you’d like to come out on the boat later?”
Kathy shook herself awake. “Is he back then … Jasper?”
“Not yet.”
Kathy was impressed. “What? You mean you’re taking the boat out by yourself?”
“That was the idea.” He shrugged. “Jasper reckons I’m about ready to take over the helm.” He feigned disappointment. “But if you don’t trust me?”
“No! I mean …’course I do, and yes, I’d love to come out on the boat with you.” She thought it was a wonderful idea. “What time?”
“Half past ten all right?”
“I’ll be there.”
“And don’t forget to wear something sensible … you’ll need plimsolls and a warm jumper. There’s a bite in the breeze this morning.”
He gave her a slow, lazy smile, then he was gone. “Don’t be late!” His voice carried back from the path.
After he’d gone, Kathy rushed around like a crazy thing. First she had a quick soak in the bath, then rummaged through her wardrobe, before she located a warm jumper. With that secure, she quickly found what she thought was a “sensible” skirt: straight and knee-length, it was a smart navy-blue in color. The white plimsolls were no problem – she had already bought them some weeks back on Jasper’s instructions.
By half past ten she was ready. She tied her hair back with a pretty red ribbon, dusted only the slightest hint of powder on her face, and touched her lips with the merest suggestion of dusky-pink lipstick.
As she ran downstairs, her heart leapt at the prospect of a day out alone with Tom on his boat. “Your dad must have heard you, after all!” It was a comforting if fanciful thought.
Tom was waiting as she ran toward the harbor. “Well, at least you look like a sailor,” he teased. “Let’s see if you have the makings of one.”
“I’m out to surprise you,” she promised.
He gave her the same wise instructions Jasper had given him when first going out. “Don’t stand too near the edge. The waters are rough through the channel. Once we’re out in the open water it won’t be so bad.”
He was right. With the breeze gently lifting the
sails, they went softly toward the narrow tunnel of water, but once they were inside and between the high walls, the wind heightened. It whipped up through the sails and swept them along, buffeting the boat from side to side, and hurling them about. “Hold on tight, Kathy!” While Tom fought to keep the vessel straight, Kathy hung onto the rails. The last thing she wanted right now was to be a heroine.
It was only minutes – but it seemed like for ever – before they broke out into open seas. “Jasper was right!” Easing the boat into the breeze, Tom laughed at the sheer joy of it all. “Once you get the hang of it, there’s nothing to it!”
It was a day Kathy would never forget. For two hours or more, with the sails billowing and the sea churning beneath them, they rode the wind, until, breathless and exhausted, Tom steered the boat into a tiny, sheltered inlet along the coast. Becalmed and private, Tom suggested Kathy might like to go for a swim. “I can’t.” She flushed with embarrassment. “I never learned to swim.”
He smiled at that. “I can see I’ll have to take you in hand.”
He took a moment to observe her, and his heart was full. As she leaned against the rail, her hair loosened by the wind, he saw the seductive yet innocent way her blouse was open to show the rise of her breasts, and those wonderful light-brown eyes looking up at him with a sense of curiosity. He thought she was the most beautiful creature on God’s earth.
As always, whenever his emotions ran riot, the guilt enveloped him. His wife had been beautiful, he reminded himself. And, suddenly, the magic of the moment was gone.
His mood was instantly changed. “Let’s have some lunch.”
“Yes, I’m ravenous.” Kathy had seen the swift change of mood in him and she knew why. Yet she daren’t open that particular conversation, for fear it might drive him further away. Instead she answered in light-hearted vein, “The sea air seems to have given me an appetite.”
“So, what do you fancy?”
“Let’s see … As you’re doing the cooking, I’ll have roast beef, Yorkshire pudding – oh, and an apple pie.” She felt full up just saying it.
He laughed. “I’ve got a bag of sandwiches, and some lemonade.” He grimaced. “Sorry. It’s not much of a choice, is it?”
Kathy smiled brightly. “That sounds wonderful to me.”
In fact, Kathy thought everything was wonderful. Lazing here in this pretty bay, with the late summer sun shining down, and the sea sparkling all around them, was wonderful. More than that, just being here with him was the most wonderful thing of all.
Watching her, Tom was torn. He longed to take her in his arms and ask her to be his wife, but always the same crippling memories held him back.
He wanted Kathy, more than anything in this world, and yet too much of him was still back there … going over the cliff-edge, with the sound of his family screaming in terror. And, though he tried hard to put it behind him, it continued to haunt him day and night.
Suddenly, Kathy was standing before him. He had been so steeped in those vivid, crippling images that he hadn’t even noticed her approaching. “Do you want to go back?” Her voice was soft, gently soothing.
Ashamed, he apologized. “I’m sorry.”
Kathy wished with all her heart she could do something, but it wasn’t in her power. “Don’t be sorry,” she urged. “I understand.”
He wondered how anyone could understand, yet she really did seem to. It was the amazing way she lifted his spirits, and her genuine, heartfelt compassion, that made him love her all the more.
Coming closer, he looked into her face and saw the anguish there. “I know how difficult it must be for you as well. But I meant what I said before,” he promised. “I do love you. And our time will come.”
She slid her hand into his. “I know.”
His smile was tenderly intimate, yet teasing. “So, are you hungry?”
“Starving … I told you! But I’ll get the sandwiches.”
“Absolutely not!” With a stern expression, he playfully demanded, “Who’s the captain on this ship … you or me?”
“You, sir!” She snapped her heels and saluted smartly.
“Exactly,” he laughed. “So sit yourself down and enjoy the view, while I get on with my duties.”
Smiling happily, Kathy obeyed the order. It was all a game, and she was content to play along. She was with Tom, and nothing else mattered. But in the back of her mind, the questions never went away. Would he ever be free of those nightmares? Was there a future for them? Or would it all end in tears?
After lunch they made their way farther along the coast to the village of Lyme Regis. Here, they came ashore, and, hand-in-hand, they went off to explore the narrow streets. They walked along the Cobb and up to the cliff tops, from where they could see the coastline stretching away in both directions. They held hands and ran and laughed like children; when he kissed her, she melted into his arms. Now, more than ever, she knew that was where she belonged.
The hours passed and soon the daylight was fading. When evening began to draw in, he suggested reluctantly, “I think it’s time we went back.”
Equally reluctant, Kathy agreed, pulling on her jumper as the air grew chillier. “Will you teach me to swim?” she asked him on the way back, and Tom said he would.
As they threaded their way along the coast, it started to rain. Tom fell silent. Kathy sensed his dark mood, but wisely said nothing. If he wanted to confide in her, he would, she thought.
And to her relief, he did. The minute the boat was safely anchored in the harbor, he asked her to stay a while. “Wait till the rain stops,” he said. “I’ll walk you home later.”
“What is it, Tom?” She always knew when he was troubled, but this time it was different somehow. “What’s wrong?”
He shook his head from side to side as he fondly observed her. “You know me too well.”
“So, there is something wrong?” Afraid now, her stomach lurched. Was this where he told her he wanted it all to end?
Her heart sank when he admitted, “There’s something I need to tell you.”
Trying to put on a brave face, she urged, “You don’t want to see me anymore. That’s it, isn’t it?”
His dark eyes grew wide with amazement. “Oh no!” Gripping her by the shoulders, he told her reassuringly, “I would never want that! If you believe anything, you must believe that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Oh, Kathy! I can’t tell you how much I want to be with you.” His voice shook with emotion. “You’re everything to me!”
Relieved, she clung to him, and for a time they took comfort in each other. Presently, he held her at arm’s length. “You knew I would have to go away sooner or later, didn’t you?”
She nodded resignedly. “Is that what you have to tell me … that you’re ready to leave me?”
He nodded, a look of reluctance on his face. “I’ve already made arrangements to see Inspector Lawson, the man who handled the case from the outset. He’s based in London now. I want us to go through everything again, with a fine-tooth comb. Dorset police say they’ve exhausted all lines of enquiry, but there has to be a way of tracking that car, and the person who sent my family to their deaths.”
His fists clenched and unclenched as he thought about it. “The police have missed something, I’m sure of it. A car and its driver can’t just vanish into thin air!”
Seeing how, in spite of him saying his rage was under control, Tom was growing agitated, Kathy wrapped her warm, gentle hands over his fist; it was clenched so tight his knuckles had bled white. “Tom?”
“Yes, darling?” Calmer now, his dark eyes smiled down on her.
“Are you sure you’re ready to deal with all that?”
Again, for a brief second, he seemed miles away. “If we’re to have any future, yes. I need to see it through.” He readily admitted, “There are still times when the anger takes a hold, but now, at long last, I really can think clearly about what happened. And there’s another thing …” He hesitated. “I’m con
vinced my wife Sheila knew who it was that drove us over the cliff.”
He let his mind go back to that moment when he first sensed it. “Just before we went over the cliff, she glanced back. I saw the look in her eyes, Kathy! I saw the flicker of recognition, then it was too late and all hell was let loose.” Running his hands through his hair, he closed his eyes in torment. “She knew. I swear to God she knew who it was!”
Realizing how it was troubling him, Kathy tried to rationalize his suspicions. “Did she call out a name?”
“No,” he recalled, “there was no name.”
“Did she say anything at all that caused you to think she knew who it was?”
Again he shook his head. “It wasn’t anything Sheila said … there was no time for that. It was just that instant when I glanced at her … an instinctive thing. It was there in her eyes … the way she looked back … the way her face fell in astonishment.”
He banged his fist on the hull. “There was no time! Later, I forgot all about it for a while. I was too sick with hatred … I couldn’t think of anything else … But, now, I’m certain of it. She did know who it was. There’s no doubt in my mind about it.”
“And have you thought who it could be?”
“Endlessly!”
“And?”
He shrugged. “And I’ve come up with nothing.”
“Surely it couldn’t have been a friend?”
“Maybe. Maybe not.” His answer was hesitant.
“Do you know all her friends?”
He nodded. “You could count her friends on the fingers of one hand. They met once in a while, went shopping, and did all the things that women do. They were women just like her, married with children. I shouldn’t think any one of those would want her hurt.”
He described her. “Sheila was well liked, had lots of interests, always going to some class or other.” He gave a small wry laugh. “I could never keep up with her!”
Something he said made Kathy wonder. “You said she went to classes?”
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