by Minda Webber
Passing a footman on her way down the large marbled stairway, Jane smiled briefly. At least she could say honestly that Asher's household was run with rigid precision. His butler, two of the butler's sons, who were also footmen, the housekeeper; and three of her daughters, who were maids and an assistant cook, had been with the earl since they were quite young. That was continuity in its extreme, since these same servants' great-grandparents, grandparents and parents had served the earl, the housekeeper had explained upon Jane's arrival. Although vampires kept knowledge of what they were on a strictly need-to-know basis, Jane had deduced that the earl's closest servants needed to know, and had been somehow sworn to secrecy by a blood oath. She shuddered at the bright red images that evoked in her head.
Fortunately for Jane, most of the staff seemed proud to finally have a mistress to serve, with a few exceptions being three or four buxom maids with fair hair. The maids Jane had eyed with displeasure, wondering just who and what the maids had been serving Asher. Stabbed with sharp needles of jealousy, Jane intended to find them employment elsewhere as quickly as possible.
And then there was Renfield, Asher's longtime valet. Renfield greatly resented her, barely concealing his contempt. She assumed that the man was her husband's human servant. Jane also knew that human servants lived longer than most mortals and were a little stronger due to sharing the master's blood twice every fourth year in some secret Nosferatu ritual. They were also extremely loyal; her lessons in vampire protocol had taught her that. But they had never taught her what to do if she found herself married to a roguish vampire with a human servant who sniffed in disdain whenever she gave him an order.
Besides his obvious disapproval of her, Renfield also gave Jane the shivers for other reasons. He had a smile like he was secretly eating bugs, and the valet's beady little eyes followed her around the mansion distrustfully. Due to the circumstances of her marriage, she supposed she couldn't blame him.
The way Asher was treating her didn't help matters with his trusted servant either. She wanted to befriend Renfield, to confide in him that her loyalty was now owned by her husband alone—as well as a bud of affection. Still, she doubted anything would put a dent in the valet's pompous armor.
She glanced warily around for any sign of Renfield. "Good, it looks like I'm in the clear," she said. After four days of her husband's silent treatment, and Renfield's not-too-subtle spying, she was ready to scream. "I've got information to ferret out and an undeadline to meet. And all I've got so far are dead ends," Jane joked to herself quietly, her brow furrowed with concern. If Dracul were in London, he probably wouldn't stay long. Not with the famous Van Helsings in residence.
Yet, every time Jane tried to quiz the staff for news concerning Dracul, or to pry with wifely concern into Asher's vampiric affairs, she would spy Renfield lurking about, her human watchdog for her not-so-human husband.
Another problem regarding living with the undead was the food. The meals left much to be desired. But, then, that was no big surprise. The tea services were in gold, which was also not a surprise. Asher's coffin was nowhere to be found. (Also not a surprise). Not that Jane had been diligently searching. But she was curious. She couldn't help imagining what Asher might look like sound asleep, like a slumbering prince before his lover's kiss awakened him. In her dreams, Jane would wake him with her lips, and he would sigh and tell her how nice it was to have her near him, sharing the nightlife.
"Yes, waking Neil would be divine," she said to herself.
Knowing that she should let sleeping vampires lie, Jane still couldn't resist searching for Asher's daytime resting place once again. She truly hated unsolved puzzles, and she was curious as to what her husband's casket looked like. And while so far she hadn't been able to elude the crafty valet in order to search the cellars of the mansion, Renfield would be occupied today in finding quarters for Bert and Orville, who had both arrived earlier this morning.
The unusually gigantic bird and his keeper had created quite a stir in the Asher household. It wasn't often the earl's staff saw a six-foot-something bird with such a big beak. And Bert—with his skinny seventeen-year-old body, carrot red hair and scruffy clothes, which Orville had chewed on—was certainly of a different bent from the starchy, impeccably dressed staff of the earls. Each and every one of those looked as if they had stepped out of the plates of La Belle Assemble, and knew what the well-dressed servant of 1828 was wearing.
"Are you feeling lucky today?" Jane asked herself, thinking she possibly had an hour to tour below. If a casket were to be found, it was probably in the cellars. For whatever reason, Jane had learned early in her studies that the undead had an affinity for resting places below ground level—in spite of the nasty cobwebs and vicious little spiders down there.
Carefully creeping down the basement stairs, she found a large wooden door. Taking the household keys, Jane unlocked the door, laughing under her breath. She had outsmarted both Asher and his valet. It seemed that at the ripe old age of twenty-three she was gaining wisdom.
Lifting the candelabra in her hand, she peered inside. Disappointment made her sigh. She had craftily discovered… the wine cellar. Shaking her head ruefully, Jane closed the door, then hurried to the other end of the dank, dark corridor, conscious of the sands of the hourglass sifting away her precious hunt-and-search time.
Unlocking this door, Jane discovered that it was much easier to push open than the first. As she lifted her candles high, the shadows were dispelled, revealing discarded furniture and other household items.
"Foiled again!" she exclaimed, but as she turned to leave, a voice behind almost startled her into dropping her light.
"Lady Asher, may I inquire as to what you are doing down here in the cellars?" Renfield asked with undisguised scorn. His words positively made her cringe.
Perhaps she wasn't as wise as she thought. Guilt crept up Jane's face, as did the beginnings of a blush. She really disliked overly clever servants. She knew the valet thought she was trying to find Asher's coffin in order to stake him. But in reality, all she wanted was to see her husband peacefully sleeping. And maybe to steal a kiss. A kiss she wouldn't get when Asher was awake and kicking.
"I was going to pick a bottle of wine for dinner," she ad-libbed, thinking the answer rather clever.
Renfield glanced around the storage room. "I see. There are so many fine vintages here. How many casks ..." Renfield stressed the syllable, and. Jane could hear him mentally adding -ets, calling her credibilty into question. "Which were you looking for?"
Jane sniffed. Good help these days was getting harder and harder to find in London. "I meant, of course, that I thought this was where the wines were kept. Of course I now realize it's merely for storing other items." She closed the door abruptly. "Please show me to where the wine is located."
Holding his candelabra high, Renfield led Jane back the way she had come. His light reflected on her footprints in the dust, trailing to the wine cellar door.
What rotten luck, Jane bemoaned. Every foot can tell a story.
The Prime of the Ancient Mariner
"I have told you time and time again that we dead men don't wear plaid," Asher reprimanded his valet, who was laying out a dark plaid waistcoat and a midnight blue jacket.
With a long-suffering look, Renfield disdainfully put the waistcoat back. "It would be superb with the jacket," he complained. Then he shrugged. "No matter. You are, after all, only having dinner with your wife." Asher shot the valet an icy look. "You're dismissed for now. I believe I'll dress myself tonight."
He walked over to the balcony off his bedroom.
There he stood in perfect silence, breathing deeply of the sweet fragrance of night-blooming jasmine and honeysuckle located in the gardens directly below. Asher loved to take in these last few moments, when the sun was a hint on the horizon like a sad song. It was as close to feeling the sunshine on his shoulder that he dared.
Welcome to my life, he thought wryly. He had stood here often like t
his, watching the pinks and deep violets with their hints of gold, fade into the inky blackness of night. In these times, in these quiet seasons of the heart, he had thought that perhaps love would find him on some dark enchanted evening. But there was no rhyme or reason to whom one fell in love with, or when. It didn't matter that he was a wild heart looking for home. Love came when it came, and left just as silently.
A sudden movement below in the garden caught Asher's attention. His bride was playing fetch-the-stick with her ugly mutt and his butler's grandson, Dickey. He could see Spot jump after the stick. He could see Jane jump, her lush breasts bouncing. He could see Dick jump. He could feel dick jump.
"Bloody hell!" It was considerably declasse for a vampire to lust after his wife, he admitted reluctantly, adjusting the bulge in his pants. It was even worse for said wife to be a Van Helsing. She wasn't even a diamond of the first water. In fact, his wife couldn't even be called a carat. She had freckles, for heaven's sake!
Asher shook his head. He liked his women pale,. whiter than himself if he could find them that way. Yet there was something about Jane, some indomitable spirit that resided in her eyes and soul. Some mystery lurked around the corner to be solved. He had to admit that she looked quite fine standing below in his garden, as if she hadn't a care in the world.
Why should she care that she hasn't seen you in four nights? Asher thought sardonically. He certainly hadn't cared to see her. He had thought distance would clear his head, would lessen his desire. Instead, his longing for her had grown to a fierce need, an aching need, which was utterly despicable. "Lusting for a Van Helsing!" he snorted.
He scowled. He had a right to be angry about this forced marriage. He didn't want to solve anything about Jane. No, in fact, he didn't even want to have dinner with her tonight. He had been avoiding her, Jetting his anger ease gradually as he returned to his old haunts, feasting on sensual delights.
Just last night he had gorged himself on a five-course meal at the Birds of Paradise Club. The club was an exclusive brothel catering to the more exotic, perfect for the hedonistic supernatural predator. It was an exciting place where gentlemen both mortal and otherworldly could find plucky whores of their choice, dressed in feathers and plumes, like sitting ducks in a row—or laying ducks in a row, as the case might be. Asher had sampled a tasty black-haired warbler, a delicious brunette partridge, a delightfully redheaded wagtail, a plump feather-headed goose and a silvery-blond soiled dove.
Yes, he had filled their bodies with his hunting cock and sipped the full-bodied blend of their blood. It had been a night to remember, to reminisce about at the Dead Poets' Society: an exclusive vampire haunt where the more literate and clever of his kind met in secret, as gentlemen are wont to do. At the Dead Poets' Society vampires discussed all subjects of the night, placed bets, conversed about upcoming events, discovered who was biting whom, played cards and discussed, naturally, all the supernatural gossip of the ton.
Yet, the past two times he'd gone to his club, he'd been silently quoting Coleridge: "7 feel 'as idle as a painted ship upon a painted ocean.'"
This melancholy feeling had only deepened today, causing Asher some concern. He was growing older. He had seen too many sunsets to count. He had felt too many dawns dragging him down to deathlike sleep. He had seen a score of kings come and go. He had been friends with a few, and disposed of a few others. Ennui was dogging his heels.
Changes. Many changes had come and gone, places and people, as the centuries crept past. Inventions, like Babbage's analytical machine, and Fulton's harnessing the power of steam. Art had become more dreamlike in quality, while music became more uplifting. Everything moved toward the future, even the changing seasons. He had loved so many women that they all ran together in a formless image of red lips, slender necks and white thighs. As of late, his pleasure was harder to seek, and boredom was his ever-present enemy perched upon his shoulder.
Lately there had been a small but insistent voice in the back of his mind calling Jane's name. Asher knew he owed his unwanted wife little to nothing, certainly not his loyalty or fidelity. Yet, he had made that solemn vow in church to love and protect her. In the three-hundred-plus years of his life, he had only broken two vows. Both had been life-and-death situations.
Cocking his head, he studied Jane closely as she walked about the garden, her misbegotten mutt following her. She was certainly no beauty in the eyes of the ton, yet she drew him in a way he could not dismiss.
Despite the marital vow he had sworn, last night's feast of flesh and blood at the brothel had been solely to get back at his wife, and to help expunge his anger. Still, her face remained firmly lodged in his head. Suddenly every sodden jacket, freckle and sight of a swan gracefully gliding across the lake in Hyde Park reminded him of Jane. It was strangely sweet, yet disconcerting, how thoughts of his wife clung to him like twining vines of honeysuckle.
"I will not feel guilty. I will carouse at all hours of the night and sleep with whom I wish. Bite as many beautiful women as I wish," he told himself angrily. He was a male vampire in his prime, and he had every reason to seek his lusty diversions. He was the master of the undead of London. Other males, both dead and alive, envied him, and all manner and species of female threw themselves at him. No one could tell him what to do with his life. Certainly not a back-stabbing Van Helsing. It had been that way for centuries. So why was he feeling so downcast tonight?
Intrigued in spite of himself, Asher observed as his wife approached that enormous freak of her big bird. He arched a brow as the avian lowered its huge head to be petted. His wife stretched up on her tiptoes to carry on a conversation with it, unaware that she was being observed. It was true: She wasn't much of a vampire hunter if she couldn't feel his hungry eyes upon her.
She spoke confidently, in a tone too low for even Asher to hear, gabbing away at the bird. The big ugly beast lowered its head again, and Jane placed a kiss on its fuzzy head. The ostrich shoved her lightly, and Asher could hear Jane's laughter ring out. She had a marvelous laugh, he admitted. His breeches tightened further.
"Damnation!" he snarled to his empty bedroom. Jane was an albatross around his neck. Just because she was intelligent and witty was no reason to want to bed the wench. Lusting after her was insane! But she did have the most incredible breasts. And her eyes were fascinating, not to mention the silken waterfall of her long burnished brown hair. And her neck was to die for.
The image of Jane brushing her hair, and how Asher wanted to see it spread all around his bride as he spent himself inside her, stiffened his erection further.
"Bloody bride! Bloody breasts! Bloody hell!" he cursed. Pie had awakened hard in his coffin, wanting to sink his fangs into Jane's neck and his arousal into her virgin body. Yes, he had been having wet dreams about his wife, fool that he was. He wanted to take her and she wanted to stake him. No matter Jane's sweet words of loyalty, nor Clair and Huntsley's assurances, Asher couldn't trust Jane any further than he could throw her.
Well, much less than that, as he could probably throw the short mortal pretty far.
Frustrated, he cursed a red streak for several moments, venting his spleen. He apparently had a voracious hunger for his bride, yet she was oblivious to the pain he was in, walking stiffly and having trouble sitting down comfortably with the bulge in his breeches. What a breach! A good wife would show concern for her husband's pants. In his fit of pique, he didn't reason that he hadn't seen Jane recently for her to help.
Instead he grieved for Clair. For Clair, he would have been willing to be married for eternity… eventually.
" 'Alone, alone. All, all alone, alone on a wide wide sea.'" Asher quoted Coleridge. He had been solo so long, sitting in the silence of his crypt. He had no one to share laughter or jests with, to discuss the gossip of the ton. He had no one to share his coffin or to pledge his scarred and bleeding heart to. He had few close friends, only acquaintances, and only one or two loves.
Part of the problem was that he was an earl.
Add to that the fact that he was a creature of the night with supernatural powers. Few would interact with such a superior being.
World-weary, Asher shook his head, amazed that he had finally married after centuries of being extremely particular about who would bear his name. This was what fate had in store for him; a bizarre female who was having a one-sided conversation with an ostrich?
Below in the garden, unaware of her husband's surveillance, Jane petted Orville.
"It's a different world here," she said to the bird. "And it can be rather lonely." She glanced around at the massive gardens. "I'm glad you're here. You're a piece of home. A wonderful piece of my past. Now, we are all here together—you, Spot, Bert and me. We have a new future to make as bright and loving as we can. If only I can be strong and brave enough to storm the castle walls that hide the earl's heart. The reward would be a love that I've only dreamed of in my deepest dreams." Jane scratched Orville's beak, picturing a good life with Asher. Bringing his slippers to his coffin at night. Sharing his love and his thoughts. Laughing with him over the day's events. Waiting for him to come home from the cemetery while she worked on her bird sketches. Could she be bold enough to make such a dream come true? Could she brave the vampire's lair and survive?
Orville nudged her gently, almost knocking her over. Jane laughed, and her heart told her to reach for the stars. "I am a Van Helsing. We are used to storming walls and are rather expert on working our way into hearts. Well, in one manner of speaking," she qualified, thinking her strategy should be a little less pointed than her father's.
Finally Jane hurried away, butterflies filling her stomach. She vowed under her breath, "Tonight I will have dinner with my husband. Our very first dinner as vampire and wife."