Shay knew what was coming next and she tried to steer her uncle into a different direction. “Brian wants to be a criminal defense attorney, maybe you can mentor him?”
Jonathan understood his niece well. “That might be possible if he moves to Arizona. Shay, I didn’t see you in any of the pictures, what’s going on?”
“That’s the day I left for Cambridge. I left early so I could get to the airport in enough time to make it through the security checkpoint.” She hoped he bought her excuse. He didn’t.
Jonathan, along with the rest of the family, recognized from day one, Shay and Brian were stuck on each other. If she left early, it certainly wasn’t because of an airplane schedule. The family’s private plane would have taken her anywhere she wanted to go. A pregnant pause followed. Jonathan didn’t press further. “I’ll be speaking at a conference in Boston next month. We’ll get together then. In the meantime, if you need anything, all you have to do is call.”
Shay pumped her fist in the air in celebration of the reprieve. “I know, Uncle, thanks.” She talked to him for a few more minutes then asked to speak to his daughter, Taylor. She and Shay were the same age and had grown up more like sisters than cousins.
“What’s up, cuz? How’s New England treating you?”
“Everything’s fine. You should come up during winter break?” Shay suggested.
“I just might do that, if you promise to hook me up with a couple of them fine Harvard men.” Taylor laughed.
“Girl, I’ve been so busy with classes, I haven’t had time to notice if the men are fine or not.”
“If you weren’t busy, you still wouldn’t have noticed,” Taylor asserted.
Shay twisted her face. “What do you mean by that?”
“Everybody knows you only have eyes for Brian.”
Shay knew her cousin spoke the truth, but since she was already a sinner, she lied. “That’s not true; Brian and I are only friends.”
“Yeah, and I was born yesterday. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, Shay; Brian does look good, especially since he shaved his head. Lucky for you, you’re my cousin. If you weren’t I might have to fight you for him,” Taylor teased.
Shay needed to end this conversation. Just thinking about how good Brian looked made her instantly think of how good he made her feel. Shay didn’t want to think about that anymore. “Hey, cuz, I have some things I need to take care of. I’ll call you later,” Shay said then quickly ended the call.
Chapter 13
“Hey, folks,” Brian called when he entered the Blackhawk estate. He found his father and stepmother in the eat-in kitchen with Josiah. Brian greeted them by hugging his father and kissing Julia on the cheek.
“We didn’t expect to see you today,” Julia said. “Are you hungry?”
Before he could answer Julia reached into the cabinet and began making him a plate. Brian didn’t object. He, like his father, loved Julia’s cooking. Her candied yams, cabbage and fried chicken were among his favorites. Today she topped the meal off with pineapple-coconut cake.
“Bi-an, Bi-an,” little Josiah called to him from his highchair.
“Hey, little man.” Brian lifted his younger brother from his chair and tickled him. Little Josiah’s giggles echoed throughout the kitchen.
Brian eyed his father watching their play and wondered if Reggie’s current thoughts were the same ones he’d voiced on numerous other occasions. Reggie wore his pride in his sons in the broad smile that showed nearly all of his pearly whites. Brian and Josiah were nineteen years apart with different mothers, but they looked so much alike. Josiah was a shade lighter than he and Brian, but everything else was the same, right down to the left dimpled cheek.
Julia set a heaping plate of food and a glass of lemonade on the table and Brian dug right in without saying grace.
“So what’s going on?” Reggie asked when Brian took a swig of lemonade.
“Nothing much.”
“Are you nervous about law school?”
“Not really. I’m looking forward to the distraction,” Brian answered his father without thinking. He didn’t want his parents to know how much he really missed Shay. Brian kept eating, hoping they’d missed his comment.
They hadn’t. Julia gave Reggie a sideways glance. Reggie shook his head, which was an indication to leave the subject of Brian and Shay alone.
“So, have you talked to your mother lately?” Julia asked. “Jonathan told me she and Mark came for a visit in Scottsdale.”
“Yeah, my mom told me about it. She’d take a trip across country to show off my graduation pictures.”
“She’s proud of you and so are we,” Reggie said proudly.
“I understand, but it’s still embarrassing,” Brian said before biting into a fried chicken leg.
“If you think she’s doing a lot now, wait until you finish law school.”
Except for an occasional comment, Brian focused on the decreasing mound on his plate. When he helped himself to a second serving Reggie and Julia watched with amazement. The plate Julia had made for him was loaded. They were used to him eating a lot, but this was excessive even for him. “Brian, when was the last time you ate?” his father asked.
Brian thought for a moment. “Two days ago.”
“Why haven’t you eaten in two days? Are you sick?” Julia asked and at the same time placed the back of her hand against his forehead.
“No, I just haven’t had much of an appetite lately,” Brian answered without realizing the implication.
This time Julia didn’t look in Reggie’s direction. “Brian, have you spoken to Shay lately?”
“No,” Brian said and quickly filled his mouth with cabbage.
Julia started, “Maybe if you’d call her—” but abruptly stopped at the sound of Reggie’s fork clanging against his plate. She ate the rest of her meal in silence.
Chapter 14
Shay stretched and let out a long yawn. She’d been studying three hours straight. Her neck was stiff and her shoulders tired. Her lower back ached and she was hungry. The clock beside her queen-sized bed read 10:00 P.M. She still had time to make her weekly check-in call to her mother.
“Good evening, Pennington residence.”
At the sound of Brian’s voice, Shay nearly dropped the phone. She didn’t expect to hear his voice, and certainly didn’t expect for it to be so soothing.
“Hello,” Brian greeted the caller again.
Shay took a deep breath. “Hello, Brian,” she said. “I didn’t expect to hear your voice.”
“I dropped by for dinner. I’m watching Barney with Josiah while the folks are out taking a swim. Is everything all right, you sound tired?”
She smiled slightly at his concern. He hadn’t heard her voice in weeks, but he immediately knew she was exhausted. “I am, but that’s to be expected with this program.”
Brian listened as she gave him the highlights of her short time in Massachusetts.
“I missed you at my graduation, Shay,” Brian finally said when she was finished.
“What are you talking about? I was there. I have your picture to prove it on my dresser.”
“Shay, you know what I mean.”
She did know. “Brian, I couldn’t say good-bye to you again,” Shay answered honestly. Shay wanted to tell him that she wanted to start over with him. She wanted to say that no matter how much she studied, she couldn’t get him out of her mind or her heart. She missed his smile and his laugh. Shay wanted to say how incomplete her life was without him. She wanted to say how her heart ached whenever she thought of how much she loved him. Instead of saying what was in her heart, she asked, “Are you seeing someone?”
The question enraged Brian. “How could you ask me that after what we shared at Emery Bay? That was only eight weeks ago. A month ago, you feared you were carrying my child and now you want to know if I’m seeing someone? Why would you ask me something like that?”
Shay didn’t know why she’d said that considering she reall
y didn’t want to see him with anyone but her.
“Shay, answer me. Is that what you really want? Are you seeing someone?”
Shay held her breath in an attempt to keep from crying. “No, I’m not seeing anyone, but it might be a good idea if we did.”
Brian took a deep breath. “Shay, did you mean what you said to me at Emery Bay?”
Shay knew what he was talking about, but she stalled. “What did I say?”
“I should just drop it, but I need to know. Did you mean it when you said you loved me?”
Shay wanted to scream YES! What came out of her mouth was, “You know as well as I do that in the heat of the moment, one will say anything. You can’t hold a person responsible for words screamed out in a wave of passion.” She gave a manufactured laugh to camouflage her nerves.
Brian didn’t see the humor. “I’m glad you enjoyed the moment,” he said and slammed the phone down.
“That’s the end of that.” Shay stared into the receiver and cried. She started to call him back, but didn’t. “It’s better this way,” she told herself an hour later when she was still crying.
***
Brian left the house right after he hung up on Shay. He despised himself for thinking she loved him. Brian had given his heart to her and all she considered him to be was a good time. Brian wanted to tell her that he didn’t want her to say good-bye, not that day or any other day. Brian wanted to tell her how much he missed her and that he wanted to start a real relationship with her. He wanted to tell her that he meant it when he’d told her he loved her. Brian wanted to say so many things, but didn’t.
Shay’s words made him feel empty and used, something he never wanted her to feel. It was obvious to him that she’d moved on and now it was time for him to do the same. Brian made a decision: Tomorrow he would start living his life completely without LaShay Hampton. No sooner had the angry words left his mouth, he knew it was impossible to do. Yet he would try.
The Replacements
Chapter 15
Shay sat in the café sipping hot chocolate and working frantically on her laptop. She’d been at it for over an hour and decided now was a good time to stretch and take a quick break. Looking out of the store’s front window she took in the New England scenery. It was quite different from the sunny Bay Area. The beautiful trees that lined the streets of Harvard Square were now filled with brown and orange leaves. Most of the branches were bare as the leaves littered the pavement, creating a unique collage. In her opinion, the orange leaves were a good match for the ivy-covered, red-brick buildings.
Shay sipped her hot chocolate and wondered how she would handle her first Thanksgiving away from her family. Maybe she’d cook a traditional dinner or better yet order one of those prepackaged holiday meals from the supermarket. She hadn’t told her mother yet, but she planned on skipping the holiday at the end of next month, using her heavy workload as an excuse. Of course the real reason she didn’t want to go home was Brian. She hadn’t spoken to him since he hung up on her two months ago. It was hard, but every day she fought to not think about him. She was successful less than half the time. No matter how much she studied and read, there was no replacing him in her heart.
Shay still wasn’t attending church which was really hard for her, because she grew up in the church. Even before her mother got saved, the two of them attended church regularly. Now, she didn’t feel worthy enough to walk into a church and sit on the back pew. When walking past a church she hung her head. The other night she tried to pray, but stopped after a couple of sentences. To her, the prayer sounded hollow and insincere. Shay had heard all of her life that God was a forgiving God, but how could He keep forgiving her after she piled sin on top of sin? First, it was committing fornication twice. Then she broke her promise to God to never to do it again, by having intercourse three more times at Emery Bay. She didn’t outright lie to Brian, but she led him to believe a lie. She lied numerous times to her mother and Reggie about why she had to leave California. That made her a fornicator and a liar and completely unworthy of God’s mercy.
She was sure her mother knew the real reason for her sudden decision to apply to Harvard had something to do with Brian. Reggie knew too, he told her as much the night before Brian’s graduation. “Nothing has happened that can’t be worked out, Shay. You and Brian are young, you have time,” he’d told her. Reggie was probably right, but Shay didn’t believe God would give her another chance. Shay wasn’t sure if she were God, she’d forgive own self.
Shay massaged her forehead after another sip of smooth chocolate then started typing again. Ten minutes later her flow was interrupted.
“Hi, LaShay, I have my half of the research completed,” Rhonda said and dropped a binder on the table. Rhonda was her classmate. They’d befriended one another the first week of class and were now working together on a project depicting the different learning styles in children.
“Great,” Shay said, but didn’t stop to look at the work.
“I also got us some help,” Rhonda added.
Shay released the keyboard and gave Rhonda her undivided attention. “That’s great. Who?”
“Jason. He should be here any minute.”
Shay frowned. She had no idea who Jason was, but if he was going to help her complete this project, she would welcome him with open arms.
Shay and Rhonda exchanged binders and laptops to study each other’s notes. They were still reviewing when Jason arrived.
“Sorry I’m late. I had to stop by the library,” he said while pulling a chair from an empty table next to them.
“No problem, let’s see what you’ve found,” Rhonda said and held out her hand expectantly.
Shay looked up from Rhonda’s work long enough to greet the newest team member. “We haven’t met, my name is LaShay Hampton,” she politely said and extended her hand to him.
Shaking her hand and smiling Jason responded, “Hello, LaShay. I’m Jason Alexander and actually we have met on several occasions. I usually sit behind you in our morning class.”
Shay’s caramel cheeks burned with embarrassment. She really couldn’t recall having ever laid eyes on him before. She studied Jason’s appearance and understood why she’d overlooked him for nearly three months. He did not have the physical characteristics that would make her take notice. For starters, he was fair-complexioned. His five-foot-ten-inch height made him only three inches taller than her. He was slim all around. She guessed his waist was no bigger than size thirty-two. She surveyed his upper body. Not much to brag about there either. No, he was definitely not someone she would have given a second glance or would have left a lasting impression. The biggest turn off was his dreads. Shay preferred the tall dark-chocolate bulkier clean-cut type. Someone like Brian.
“Sorry, I’m so engrossed in class that the only person I notice on the regular is the professor.”
“She’s right,” Rhonda added, “I had to introduce myself three times before she remembered my name.”
“No problem, we can get to know each other now.”
Jason’s grin was too casual for Shay’s taste. “What we can do is work on this assignment. Let’s see what you’re bringing to the table.”
Jason must have picked up on Shay’s no-nonsense tone. His smile faded and he turned the focus of the conversation to schoolwork.
After an hour of working on the project, Shay packed up her laptop and prepared to leave. As she zipped up her parka Jason asked, “What time are we meeting on Wednesday?”
“This time is perfect for me.” She turned to Rhonda. “What about you?”
“I don’t get off work until six on Wednesdays, but I can come right after,” Rhonda answered.
“I don’t finish at the bookstore until five-thirty,” Jason stated. “Shay, do you have to work late on Wednesday nights?”
Once again Shay was reminded of how blessed she was to be at Harvard. Thanks to her mother’s success as a real estate developer, she was able to attend one of the most pr
estigious schools in the country and not have to worry about tuition or living expenses. It was her family’s connections that got her into the program at the ninth hour. Both her uncle and aunt were Harvard alumni and the Simone Company contributed heavily to the school on an annual basis.
“No, Jason. I don’t work, so I’m flexible,” she finally answered.
“Let’s meet at six-thirty, that way we can get at least two hours in,” Rhonda suggested.
“Six-thirty it is.” Shay picked up her laptop and braced herself for the cold air.
***
From the doorway Jason watched her walk down the sidewalk and get into the new small white SUV and drive off. He had approached Rhonda about working with them as a way to get to know LaShay, since he wasn’t having any luck with her in class. From day one, he’d noticed her, but she proved today that the attraction wasn’t mutual.
“Is she always so stiff?” he asked Rhonda when she made her exit.
“Yes. LaShay’s all about business.”
“I’ll have to do something about that. No one should be that serious.”
Rhonda adjusted the shoulder strap on her book bag. “I wouldn’t focus on LaShay Hampton if I were you. You have better odds at passing the program than you do with getting close to her.”
Jason stuffed his free hand into his front jacket pocket. Maybe Rhonda was right. Pursing the beautiful LaShay could prove useless. There was only one way to find out.
Chapter 16
Done with his study session, Brian looked at his watch. He still had two hours left before Bible Study. He was proud of himself. His spiritual life was back on track and he felt good about his life again. At the beginning of the semester, he’d ended his weekly counseling sessions with his father and no longer felt dirty and unforgiven for committing fornication. In his heart, he knew he still loved Shay, but accepted that they would never be anything more than friends. However, he still kept a framed picture of her on his nightstand and every day he fought the urge to call her.
Games Page 5