by Laura Martin
Amelia felt her heart skip a beat and then another. An acute pain ripped through her chest as she saw Edward consider the proposal and nod slowly.
‘That seems fair,’ he said eventually.
‘No!’ she screamed.
‘Shh, Amelia, everything is settled,’ McNair said, releasing her and pushing her into Edward’s arms. ‘I’ll see you at dawn tomorrow, Sir Edward, past the lake and on the rise near the northern edge of your estate.’
‘Tomorrow.’ Edward nodded.
McNair walked calmly out of the room without looking back.
Chapter Twenty-Three
‘You can’t go,’ Amelia said, a note of hysteria in her voice. ‘He’ll kill you.’
Edward grimaced. It was quite possible. McNair had served in the army for a long time and had no doubt been trained to fire a pistol accurately. Whilst Edward owned a gun, and had learnt to shoot as a boy, he hadn’t picked up his pistol for many years.
‘It’s settled, Amelia.’
‘It’s not settled. We can find another way.’
She reached out to him and Edward hated the look of pain and confusion that crossed her face as he let her hand hang in the air. He couldn’t touch her, not now. He’d sworn to protect her, to keep her safe no matter what, and he’d failed at the very first test.
‘Edward?’ Amelia said, trying to catch his eye.
‘I need to go and prepare. I’ll see you later,’ he said shortly.
Quickly, before she could react, he strode out the door and made for his rooms in the West Wing. He needed to think, to puzzle things through, and that wasn’t possible with Amelia right there distracting him.
He closed the door to his bedchamber behind him and sank down on to the bed. Edward couldn’t believe he’d let himself be fooled by McNair’s trick. The wily scoundrel had paid a man to sneak into the grounds and be caught in his place, then used the distraction to get to Amelia. He should have seen it coming, should have stayed with her no matter what. Instead he’d rushed off to confront McNair and left Amelia vulnerable. When he’d burst into the room and found her with a gun to her back he’d almost expired on the spot.
‘You can’t just run away from me,’ Amelia said, flinging open the door to his bedroom and stepping inside. She was fired up, recovered from her ordeal only minutes earlier, and ready to do battle.
‘Amelia, I need some peace.’
‘What for? What’s going on, Edward? You need to talk to me. You can’t keep trying to solve everything by yourself.’
Edward remained silent. Amelia sighed dramatically and flopped down on the bed next to him.
‘Do you know I’ve just been held at gunpoint by a man who would like to hurt me very much?’
‘Of course I do, Amelia.’ And he felt like such a cur for not being more supportive.
‘I thought I might die. He threatened to cut me, you know. And to shoot me.’
Edward felt the nausea rise inside him as he pictured all the awful things McNair would likely want to do to Amelia. It was his job to protect her and so far he’d failed miserably.
‘I was scared—in fact, I was petrified—but nothing scared me as much as hearing you accept his challenge to a duel.’
He was just about to open his mouth to reply when her words hit him and he stopped to consider them for a moment.
‘I don’t know what I’d do if you were harmed...’ She paused for a moment and took his hand. ‘Please don’t push me away.’
Her plea was so heartfelt and so sincere Edward knew that for once in his life he would have to share his innermost thoughts.
‘I promised to protect you, Amelia,’ he said quietly. ‘And I failed.’
He watched as she opened her mouth and then closed it again as she digested his words.
‘I swore I wouldn’t let anything happen to you and three days later a man is holding a pistol to your back.’
‘You couldn’t have done any more,’ Amelia protested quietly.
‘You deserve someone who can take care of you, Amelia, a man who will protect and shelter you.’
‘I deserve a man who cares for me,’ Amelia said, ‘Nothing more and nothing less. Everyone deserves to be cared for, but I can’t ask someone else to be responsible for the consequences of my actions.’
He studied her face, saw her earnest expression and knew she believed what she was saying. She’d changed so much in the couple of months she’d been staying with him. The energetic, mischievous little minx was still there, but Amelia was more thoughtful, more considerate now. He supposed she’d had to do a lot of growing up in the last few months.
Amelia leaned forward and kissed him softly, conveying all of her compassion and understanding through the meeting of their lips. Edward wanted to give in, to let himself accept her forgiveness, but some small part of him held back.
‘Kiss me, Edward,’ Amelia whispered. ‘Kiss me and show me you care for me.’
With a groan he surrendered and kissed her, pulling her body close against his and running his hands down her back. He wanted to stay in this moment for ever, just the two of them with no McNair and no duel and no threats.
His position hadn’t changed. Tomorrow he was still going to ride out and meet McNair in a duel. Edward had no doubts that by early morning he would either be dead or a killer, but maybe that was all the more reason to enjoy today.
* * *
Amelia let her head drop back and felt her hair tickle her skin as it fell down her back. Edward was kissing her neck, making her shudder with anticipation as he slowly moved his lips across her skin. Alongside the almost overwhelming desire she felt elated. For once in her life she’d made a difference. Edward had come up to his room withdrawn and brooding, but she’d managed to coax the truth from him, and make him see he wasn’t responsible for every little consequence when something went wrong.
True, they still had the dilemma of what to do about McNair, but Amelia was sure together they could come up with a solution. As long as Edward agreed not to go and face him in a duel, especially with pistols. McNair had years of army training and a familiarity with the weapon he’d chosen. Although Edward was more powerful than McNair, and surprising agile for a man of his size, Amelia knew he wouldn’t have a chance in this sort of duel.
She knew Edward was just trying to protect her, trying to take McNair’s wrath towards Amelia and direct it towards him instead, but in a way McNair had chosen the right way to wound Amelia when suggesting the duel. Right now physical pain would not be worse than the thought of losing Edward. For so long she’d felt alone and now she had someone who cared for her, all her faults and quirks included. And she rather thought she loved him more than she’d ever imagined was possible. If McNair killed Edward, then Amelia would be destroyed.
Pausing for a moment and pulling back, Edward looked at her face as if to check she really wanted him to go further. Amelia felt light-headed, swept away, but she knew if Edward pulled away now she would be devastated.
Amelia gasped as Edward pushed the neckline of her dress down to expose the skin of her chest. She shivered as the cool air hit her sensitive skin, but immediately Edward’s hands were on her, warming and teasing. Never had she been touched like this before, never had she imagined a fingertip could cause such a delicious sensitivity.
Suddenly she wanted to see him as he saw her and with agile fingers Amelia lifted Edward’s shirt up over his head and threw it on to the bed behind them, placing her own hands on his chest. For a moment they both paused, looking into each other’s eyes and just enjoying the feel of the other’s hands on their bodies. Then Edward was on his feet, lifting Amelia and pushing her dress down past her waist and over her hips so it fell and pooled around her ankles.
Amelia felt his eyes on her, roaming over her body under the thin chemise. She
’d always imagined she would be self-conscious when a man saw her naked, but with Edward it just felt right.
Slowly he stripped her of the rest of her clothes, allowing her to savour the feel of the cotton chemise as it glided over her skin, baring her body as he pulled it up over her head. Five seconds passed, and then ten, with Edward’s eyes darting over her body. Amelia felt a delicious anticipation as slowly he kicked off his boots and divested himself of his trousers. For a moment they both just stood there, then Edward took her in his arms and they tumbled back on to the bed.
There was something frenzied, almost wild, about their movements, as if both of them knew something had changed. Amelia told herself it was the brush with death, the residual feelings of danger and relief to be alive, but as Edward pushed against her she lost all coherent thought.
Amelia felt her body tense, but instead of the pain she’d been told to expect she just felt Edward’s fingers stroking her gently. Rhythmically he teased and tantalised until Amelia felt as though her entire body was going to melt into the bedsheets. A warm sensation began building deep inside her and she felt her hips begin to rise to meet Edward’s touch.
As he withdrew his fingers and positioned himself on top of her he searched her face as if checking she wanted to continue. Amelia moved her body up towards him, drawing him in, and groaned as he pressed into her.
Faster and faster he moved until Amelia felt something burst inside her and a warm wave of pleasure washed over her. Above her Edward stiffened and groaned before collapsing on to the bed beside her.
Afterwards she lay with her head resting on Edward’s shoulder, his arm looped around her body and holding her close. She felt contented and safe, despite the events of earlier that day. As she traced her fingers over Edward’s chest she wondered what this meant for them, whether it meant Edward would ask her to marry him. Of course she knew plenty of people were intimate and didn’t marry, but she could dare to hope this might mean he definitely wanted a future with her.
They were no closer to finding a solution to their problem, no closer to working out what to do about McNair and his thirst for revenge, but Amelia felt strangely calm. Throughout this entire episode she had felt as if events had been taken out of her control. At first, when she’d been convinced she was a murderer she had been petrified and unstable. Then when she’d discovered McNair was alive and seeking her out she had been scared of what he might want and what he would do. Now, even though the threat was very real, even though he’d held a gun to her back earlier that day, Amelia felt as if for the first time in ages she had some say in what happened next.
Of course Edward couldn’t go to meet McNair in the duel, so instead they would have to decide whether to involve the local magistrate or deal with him in another way themselves. Whatever they decided, Amelia was determined they would do it together. Edward might want to protect her from McNair and she was never going to discourage him from looking out for her, but this was her mess and for once she was going to face the consequences of her actions and help come up with the solution.
With this firmly resolved in her mind Amelia allowed her mind and body to relax into Edward. He held her close against him, every so often bending down to plant kisses on the top of her head.
The late evening sun was streaming through the bedroom window, warming up Amelia’s naked body making her eyes droop. Edward’s hand stroking her upper arm was lulling her off to sleep and Amelia felt her entire body relax. Right here, right now she felt safe. Later they could talk some more and decide what path they would take, but now she was going to enjoy resting in the arms of the man she loved.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Edward felt like a cur as he slipped out of the bed an hour before dawn. Amelia had slept soundly since their intimacy the evening before and hadn’t stirred when he had gently rolled her off his arm. He knew he should wake her, he should give her the option of accompanying him to the duel site, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. As she’d fallen asleep in his arms he’d watched her contented smile and peaceful expression and he felt awful for misleading her.
Edward knew Amelia had taken their intimacy the night before as a sign he wouldn’t go and meet McNair and he hadn’t disillusioned her. In a way it would be much easier to walk out with a pistol in his hand, facing down the seasoned army Captain, without Amelia watching.
Quickly he dressed, throwing on a clean shirt and breeches, and grabbed his boots to put on outside the bedroom. Before he left he bent over and kissed Amelia on the forehead, smoothing away her hair and taking a moment to take in her serene expression, how her eyelashes rested on her rosy cheeks and the gentle curve of her lips. He knew he might never see her again and he wanted to imprint her face on his memory to have something to hold on to if he was shot and his life blood was ebbing away.
Forcing himself out of the room, Edward strode down the stairs and out into the fresh pre-dawn air, pausing only to pull on his boots and pick up his pistol from the study. He didn’t have a second. Over the years of his seclusion he’d lost contact with his friends and he had no desire to pull any of them into this mess anyway. No, if he was shot then he would just have to accept his fate without anyone to fuss over him.
As he began the process of readying his horse, securing the saddle and talking softly to the restless beast, he wondered if he was being a little self-indulgent going off to meet McNair in this manner. He knew the guilt he felt over his late wife and son’s death had nearly consumed him, nearly destroyed him. He’d promised to love and protect them, and whilst he’d fulfilled the first part of his vow, he’d failed miserably on the second. Now, with Amelia filling his thoughts and his heart, he had someone else to protect. And this was the only way he could think about doing it.
Pushing all doubts aside, Edward mounted his horse. The fact remained that if he didn’t go and meet McNair then Amelia would be at risk and he couldn’t have any harm to her on his conscience.
It was peaceful riding out over the estate as the first rays of sunlight filtered up over the horizon. It was going to be a beautiful day and already the birds were chirping and singing.
He arrived at the duel site first, dismounted and secured his horse. Quietly he sat down with his back against a tree and waited for McNair to arrive.
* * *
‘I see you honoured our agreement,’ McNair sneered as he approached about ten minutes later.
‘Of course.’
‘You didn’t bring a second.’
‘Nor did you.’
The two men looked at each other warily.
‘There’s nothing to stop me shooting you where you sit,’ McNair said eventually.
‘Nothing but honour.’
‘You think I’m an honourable man?’
Edward snorted. ‘No. But I think you have some sense of justice, even if it is a little twisted. You won’t shoot me until the duel is under way.’
McNair looked at him curiously and for a moment Edward wondered if he’d read the man wrong. Eventually the Captain threw his head back and laughed.
‘So you left the little lady at home?’ McNair asked, looking around as if checking Amelia wasn’t hiding behind a tree or under a bush.
It was Edward’s turn to laugh. He’d never heard such an inaccurate description of Amelia. She might be petite in size, but she was large in spirit and courage and soul. McNair would never understand just what he’d missed out on by not embracing Amelia.
‘That is none of your concern. Shall we stop gossiping like old women and get this over with?’
Edward stood, drawing his pistol. McNair nodded, took two tarnished swords from where they were sticking out of a saddlebag and began to mark out the parameters.
When the two swords were a good distance apart McNair made his way back to Edward.
‘Seeing as there’s no inde
pendent witness we’ll start at the swords. I’ll shout advance and we shall begin walking towards each other. You may fire at any point.’
Edward had never been in a duel before, but it sounded fair enough. Of course McNair might decide to shoot him as he was walking out to the starting point, but he didn’t think so. The army officer might be a scoundrel, but he seemed to have his own warped sense of honour.
Checking his pistol one last time, Edward began walking out towards the sword, occasionally glancing over his shoulder to check McNair’s progress. Just before he reached the starting point he heard a faint thundering of hooves and turned sharply. Galloping up the gentle slope was Amelia, her hair flying out behind her and her expression frenzied.
* * *
Amelia had woken slowly, revelling in the warmth of the bed and the glow of the memory of the night before. As she allowed her eyes to flutter open she expected to see Edward’s form lying beside her, but instead there was an empty bed.
Immediately she was wide awake, her eyes roaming the room for possible clues as to where he’d gone. The inevitable realisation that he’d sneaked out to meet McNair kept trying to push its way into her mind, but Amelia desperately sought for more pleasant alternatives. Maybe he’d gone to bring her breakfast in bed, or maybe he’d just woken early and had decided to go for a morning stroll.
Jumping out of bed, Amelia knew none of these things were true. Last night she’d been foolish thinking Edward had agreed to stay clear of McNair and the ridiculous duel. She had wanted him to see sense and accept her point of view on the matter and she had fooled herself into thinking that he had.
The anger she felt at him slipping out to meet McNair was overshadowed by a much greater feeling of worry. There was no way Edward could win this duel. She had seen McNair shoot—in fact, he’d been the one to teach her and her cousin to fire a pistol, setting up targets for them to practise on. McNair was good, better than good. She’d never seen him miss. And she doubted he would fire wide to preserve Edward’s life.