She closed her eyes and relaxed in the shade of the umbrella as a few images passed through her mind. She sighed. Guess they’ve both ignored my advice completely. Wouldn’t be the first time, but they really were terrible at this. Still, it wasn’t up to her to decide who had the gift, only to help them on their path.
Cath supposed baby steps were better than no steps at all.
“Time to get the training wheels on now, kiddos.”
As she packed up her vacation clothes and made a list of what she would need for snow, she felt some of her usual lightness of heart diminish. These two had a dark task ahead of them, and if they failed… She shook her head, not wanting to think about what would happen. It was a high-stakes task for their first real trial, but then again, if they had found their way to teaming up earlier in their lives, they would have had a good deal more practice by now.
One thing she had learned, destiny had a way of making up for lost time.
Chapter 19
Ally was shocked when Cath showed up at her door, at 7:30 a.m. on a Wednesday morning.
“Is this a dream?” Her parents were still in bed, and she thought she had woken up, but…
“No, it’s not. But it is frigid out here, and I just came from the tropics, so could you invite me in?”
Speechless, Ally stepped back and opened the door wide. It was frigid, and the wind blew hard enough she had to push a little to close the door. “I guess autumn is over,” she said.
“Almost, not quite. This is just a little preview.”
“How do you know that?” Ally was beginning to wonder just how far Cath’s gifts extended.
“I looked at the weather forecast, of course.”
“Oh.” She was still trying to wrap her head around this appearance. How did Cath know where she was? Did her visions extend to addresses? “Would you like some coffee?”
“Yes, please. We have a lot to talk about.”
“Oh?”
“Yes, but coffee first.”
It was awkwardly silent while Ally brewed the coffee, and her feet were cold, so she went to her room to get a pair of knitted socks. Her mother poked her head from her room sleepily. “Are you talking to someone?” Her expression perked up as she added, “Is Stuart back?”
“No, it’s a friend…. Kind of. We could use some time to talk alone, though. Can I bring you up some coffee?”
Her mother declined. After Ally put on her socks and headed back downstairs, she found she couldn’t look straight at Catherine. She was too bright. She took two mugs from the rack and poured the beverages. “Do you always look like… that?”
She sat down and passed the extra mug across the table.
Cath took a sip and nodded her approval. She leaned back and cupped her hands, soaking in the warmth. “Honestly, I don’t know. I don’t see it on myself that often, unless it’s really going crazy. Mostly it’s to be a beacon to people like you.”
“People you’re supposed to… help?”
Cath shrugged. “‘Help’ is a strong word for what I do. You help. I guide.”
“So the beacon is supposed to help me find you?” That didn’t work so great, she thought.
“It’s more like, it’s telling you to pay attention. So, pay attention.”
“Why can one light mean so many things? How can it mean death and destiny and pay attention?”
“Well, that may be hard to explain, if you haven’t already figured it out for yourself.” Ally felt more than a little judgment in the woman’s words - and in the way she looked at Ally.
Ally decided to take a shot at it. “Okay, so… I guess it’s like they are all part of the same thing. Like you were saying about not having the right word for it, and destiny is the closest we come, and death is a part of that, and so is paying attention to a guide.” She sipped her coffee cautiously, and added self-consciously, “Something like that.”
Cath rewarded her with a half-smile. “Something like.”
“But there’s more, isn’t there?” Ally processed it as she spoke. It was something she had started to see earlier, especially in the attic, but now it crystallized into words. Cath raised her eyebrows, and there was a glint in her blue eyes. “I think… I think the way the light looks around people and around things… it’s different.”
Cath leaned in, nodded. “Go on.”
“Around people, it has a sort of brightness, and around objects, it’s softer, purplish?”
Cath just looked at her. Ally felt like there was something… one last piece that needed to fall into place. “Death. It’s the brightest, easiest to see. Why?”
“There you go, good girl. Good question!”
“So… Is there an answer?”
“I certainly have my theory. And I may have said it to you before, but I can’t quite remember if it was in person or in projection.”
Projection. Ally thought that was a lovely word for visiting someone’s dreams. She wondered if it was something she could learn to do.
Ally quoted, “‘Death is the greatest destiny of them all.’”
“Yes!” Ally thought the woman way too enthusiastic. “That’s my theory, anyway.”
“I think… I had a memory from when I was a kid. Really small… my first vision. Maybe my first memory.”
Catherine said nothing, but she softened her posture, as if physically trying to send the imagine of no pressure, in your own time.
It took Ally a moment to gather herself, to decide how much of this formative memory she was ready to share. “I think I felt that way, once.” She felt a surge of hope, but just as quickly it washed away. “I haven’t felt that way for a long time, though.”
She heard her parents moving around above, showering and preparing for their relaxed, retired day that wasn’t particularly relaxed nor in retirement. They had just taken some time to find what they really were meant to do. “I don’t understand how death can be a good thing. It ends everything. Everything we work so hard for. There’s so much suffering, and death just makes it all… pointless. Why even try?”
Her eyes itched, and she felt herself firming her body against criticism, putting a mental block up against whatever judgment may come. It was reflexive; she felt vulnerable, so she put up protection.
“Why try indeed?” Catherine’s voice was a murmur. “Now, catch me up on what’s happened since I saw you last.”
“You don’t know?”
Catherine laughed. “I really am not all-knowing. I know enough to know that you have made mistakes and missed opportunities, but I don’t know the specifics. Better you tell me straight up, then I can figure out how to get you back on track.”
Ally finished off two cups of coffee in the time it took her to tell the story. She didn’t go into too much intimate detail, but she did let Cath know how much the romance had been confusing: invigorating, but difficult to commit to.
When she was finished, ending the story with not having heard from Stuart in many days, Cath gave her a strange look. “You left something out.”
“Did I?” Ally shook her head.
“In the woods. Who was there? There’s someone you’re supposed to help.”
“Ugh, no. That was the worst day.” Ally shuddered. “That had to be a mistake.”
“Tell me what happened. Don’t leave anything out.”
Ally hesitated, but she told her the whole day. The dream, and the disappointment of Stuart not coming, and even the dream with Cath (that she assumed Cath remembered, but who knew? She was living in a down-the-rabbit-hole world). To her dismay, she wasn’t able to maintain the detachment she had when she had relayed the events to the police and her own mother. She fell apart several times, and had to gather her composure before continuing.
“Okay, that’s all,” she finally said with great relief.
Cath nodded. “Yes, it is. She reached across and wrapped one of Ally’s hands in hers. “I’m so sorry this happened, dear. But that was me, and I’ll say it again. You can’t do t
his alone.”
Ally bristled, and pulled her hand away. “We should go outside. My parents will be down soon.”
“I think we’re fine here.” Her voice quiet, calm.. But insistent. “We only have a little more to talk about, and then you have a phone call to make.”
We’ll see about that, Ally thought, feeling every inch a teenager in rebellion. She wasn’t going to be bossed around. She made a small, “Hmm,” noise instead. Noncommittal.
“Why would you even want to do it alone?”
Ally huffed. “First of all, I don’t even know what it is. I saw the woods in my dream, and I was back there, and I thought I was following the signs. I didn’t know I’d find a maniac back there. There’s not even a proper road back there.”
“Yes, he’s a clever man.”
“He’s a psycho.”
Cath shrugged. “Could be both, most are.”
“And second,” Ally continued, “why shouldn’t I do it alone? I don’t need a man. It’s not very feminist of you to be all, ‘You need Stuart.’”
“Oh, girl!” Cath laughed. “It’s not up to me who you need. And tell me you don’t need him.”
“I don’t.” She heard the pout in her voice, and hated it. “I’m fine. I can have a business and I’m coming back to music. I don’t need him. And look, I don’t see a man hovering around you all the time.”
Cath rose from her chair and stretched her arms overhead, taking off her coat after a long time. Ally rose and took it from her, and went to the living room to lay it on the couch.
Cath followed her in, sat on the couch, and gestured for Ally to sit. “My work is solitary. I enjoy it, and it’s best that way.”
“So?” Ally cringed. “I’m sorry, I just mean, then why can’t my work be solitary?”
“It could be, but it will make it so much more difficult. My work is as a guide, but yours is to help, and more than that, it’s to heal. Many healers throughout history have walked alone, and if you want to comfort yourself in your solitude, you could certainly spend many evenings reading their tales of sorrow as they save the world.”
Healers? Saving the world? Okay, now she’s just talking nonsense.
Ally just shook her head, baffled.
“Oh!” Cath exclaimed, glowing with delight. “You didn’t figure that part out. I thought you had, when you and Stuart performed for the group.”
“What? No, I didn’t figure anything out that night. It was just confusing and overwhelming. I think that’s why..” She swallowed. “Why he’s gone.”
“That’s not why he’s gone. He’s made some poor lifestyle choices, but we’ll get that sorted. Didn’t anyone tell you what a difference that night made to them?”
When Cath said “poor lifestyle choices,” Ally’s thoughts went immediately to other women, but she shook it off. Not important. She thought back over all the things people had said to her, and she had shrugged it off as hyperbole.
“Tell me.” Catherine insisted.
“Um, weird things. Like the flu, coughs, feeling depressed…”
“You know that’s not normal, right? The first compliments given to singers are usually, ‘You have the prettiest voice.’ Not, ‘You made my cough go away.’ But people know when they’ve been touched, when they’ve been healed. That’s your gift.”
“Oh.”
“And it works best with a partner, so you best get on the phone and tell Stuart to get his butt back here ASAP.”
Chapter 19
Brad was ready as he would ever be. He would make it quick and only take one gun. One would be enough to cause chaos and fear at a grocery store at 5:30 p.m. Nothing to it. Go to the store entrance, aim for the check-out lines. He wouldn’t hit the big, glorious numbers, wouldn’t set any records.
But they would fear him, and he would have this experience at least once before he died. That would be enough. He wouldn’t be a nobody, not to them. Their worlds would revolve around him, and he’d be the subject of some sanctimonious hand-wringing on the news until the next news cycle began. It never ended.
But it was enough. It was more than anyone would think of him if he blew his brains out in private.
Now, at least someone would acknowledge his existence. He would leave his mark.
***
Stuart stared at the phone when Ally’s number came up that morning. He’d had nothing to drink in 24 hours, and had 4 cups of coffee, but as much as he’d been rehearsing what to say to her when he called, he wasn’t at all prepared for her to call him.
The phone rang almost to the point of going to voice mail when he worked up the courage to answer. “Ally.” Her name was like music as he spoke it.
“Stuart.” Her voice… God, he missed her. “Would you be able to come back?”
“I think so.” He tried to sound casual, though his heart was soaring. “This weekend… That would work. I have everything set up so they can get by without me.”
After a long pause, she responded, “Today would be better.”
“Why?”
Another long pause. “Have you had any dreams or… you know?” Visions? He completed her sentence in his mind.
“No,” he answered. “I’ve made some… poor lifestyle choices.”
Ally laughed. That was the last thing he expected. “Get here as soon as you can. We have a job to do.”
***
Stuart pulled into the driveway at 4 p.m. He managed the first flight and drove as fast as he could without risking lives. Ally looked delighted to see him, and Cath nudged her to the door, while Holly Jefferson watched with no little confusion. No one explained why this woman arrived this morning, or why Stuart returned with urgency.
A distant, loud rumble of a truck skittered on the horizon, but Holly didn’t see one come over the hill. She decided it must be a new piece of equipment on the neighboring farm. Those combines grew bigger every year. She poured mugs of cider that had been simmering in the slow cooker all afternoon. Catherine took one, and when Stuart came to the door, Ally handed him one and took one for herself.
Ally burst with nervous energy. “What is going on?” Holly blurted. The others looked at each other.
Cath sighed. “I’m not sure they know yet, but they aren’t keeping any secrets from you. But… well. Things may get a little odd.”
“Oh.” Holly felt left out. “Well, I suppose I’ll go upstairs, then.”
“Oh, mom, it’s not like that. It’s all just... weird.” She looked at Cath, but the woman offered nothing. “It’s really not easy to explain, but I’ll try sometime.”
Suddenly it clicked. “Oh,” she said. “Oh!”
“Mom, are you okay?”
She grabbed her daughter and hugged her tight. “It all makes sense now! You can see that light around everyone, too!”
“What? You can see it?” She didn’t let her daughter go. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Oh, you can imagine. You probably know better than anyone! I can’t believe I never noticed. Has it been like that for you your entire life?”
Ally pulled back, holding her mother at arm’s length. “I don’t understand. How could you not know?”
“No clue. None at all… I just thought you were a sensitive child. I never thought it could be hereditary.”
Ally stepped back and turned to Cath. “Did you know she saw it?”
Cath shook her head. “Honestly, no. I would have thought I saw everyone like us, but perhaps it’s only those I’m meant to guide.”
“Oh, Ally. I wish I had known. It was just background noise in my life for so long. I ignored it, honestly. It was only when I started visiting the prison that I couldn’t ignore it anymore.”
“Like mother, like daughter.” Cath chuckled. Ally glared at her.
“So, am I supposed to help you all with … whatever this is?” She sat heavily in the closet chair.
Ally took a notebook from her back pocket and flipped the pages. “I don’t think so. Just Stuart and me.”
/>
“So why is she here?” Holly tilted her chin at Cath.
“I am here because these two have not been paying attention, and there is too much at stake if they don’t right now. But now Stuart is here, and they are on their way. I’ll be going.” She hugged Stuart and Ally. “Good luck, you two. I’m sure I’ll see you again before long.”
When she approached Holly, she only shook her hand and said, “I read the article in the paper about you. I’m impressed. Keep it up.”
Holly felt her face warm, and wondered why the woman hadn’t offered the compliment in all the hours they had been sitting awkwardly today. “Thank you.”
They watched Cath drive away. Ally said, “Get your violin. We have to go.”
Holly waved them off, sending a silent prayer after them.
Chapter 20
Ally handed Stuart the notebook. He read the entries with growing horror. “God, Ally.” He put the notebook down in the center console with a shaking hand. “We can’t do this.”
“It seems pretty straightforward.”
“It seems insane. You could get killed.”
Ally shrugged. “I don’t think I will. But I couldn’t live with knowing I could have prevented a lot of other people getting killed.”
She had a point. It wasn’t like they could just go out for ice cream and pretend nothing would happen.
Her visions had been incredibly detailed and bizzarre: 5:33, Full Stop Grocery, gunman needs healing. After the avoided tragedy, he gets a job at the gym and turns his life around.
“It’s also nice to imagine we can actually change one of these cretins, isn’t it? I’m so sick of these assholes…. But I think this one could actually be a good guy.”
She caught him up on the last few days, and he told her a little about his time back in NYC - minus the constant mild intoxication (with meanderings into the less-than-mild). He updated her on (music shop owner), who was doing much better and back at work. He had hired a home health aide, who had become a close, fast friend.
He had been rambling for a few minutes, and they were nearing their destination, when he connected the dots. “Hold on. The guy who chased you in the woods - is that this guy?”
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