Leanna turned away, overcome by confusion. But Bryce seemed to show no indecision. He would leave and that would be that.
“I guess…this is goodbye,” she said, her throat constricting. A dullness invaded her, and it grew, despite her will to ignore it.
“I’m afraid so. When I came here, I had hoped I could make some reparations for what happened years ago. But I see that the blame is not all mine,” he said.
Leanna looked at him, her misgivings increasing by the minute, for what she saw in his eyes looked like cold distrust.
“Then nothing I can say or do will make you think any better of me.” She drew back into the room as he reached for the doorknob at the distant sound of a car approaching the driveway.
“You’ll hear from my lawyer. Don’t fight me on this.”
His gaze held hers for the last time, and then he turned away and disappeared into the night to the waiting car.
Leanna closed the door, the ache in her heart chilling her to the core. Why did his reaction hurt her so? Because even the worst she’d expected wasn’t this—that he’d hire a lawyer. Now all she could do was wait with foreboding and hold on to Kai for as long as she possibly could. Would she lose Kai’s affection as well? Fear and misery sank her into a stupor. She hadn’t planned it like this.
She heard a car drive up. Chester, Alice and Kai were back from having ice cream. And they would find Bryce gone.
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The door opened and Kai tumbled in, followed by Chester and Alice.
“Hi, Mommy.” Kai looked around. “Where’s Bryce? I want to show him my pretend volcano.” She brandished a small purple volcano, the type that came with boxes of cereal.
Leanna had once filled one of these with vinegar and baking soda and watched the wonder in Kai’s face as the “lava”
bubbled over.
“He had to leave, honey. He asked me to say ‘bye’.”
Leanna helped Kai remove her jacket and hung it up in the closet.
“Why’d he leave? I was going to drop him off at the motel.” Chester’s scraggly eyebrows rose. No doubt he was trying to make sense of Bryce’s unscheduled departure.
Leanna understood Chester’s respect and liking for him.
A dry laugh rose in her throat. Everybody liked Bryce.
Too bad she and he couldn’t get their lives to mesh together.
“Fred came by and picked him up. Bryce wanted to make sure the equipment was loaded in right,” she replied with a benign smile. No need to let on what had happened, especially when Alice picked up things like radar.
“Too bad. We could have chatted some more.” Chester shook his head.
“You like him, Dad?”
“You bet. Can’t understand why…” He stopped and glanced at Kai who wilted like a drooping flower. “Time for bed eh, little girl?”
“Good night, Grampa.” Kai hugged him and Alice and scuttled off to her room.
Leanna hugged her father and Alice, and saw them to the door. “Goodnight. And thanks for the help.”
She tried to ignore the query in Alice’s eyes as she walked down the steps holding onto Chester’s arm. Leanna managed 186
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to keep her composure. She’d think about the hollow feeling in her throat later, after Kai dropped off to sleep.
Leanna went into the kitchen and poured herself a cup of still-hot coffee. The first sip somehow revived her.
Tomorrow she’d pick up the pieces and get on with her life with Kai.
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Chapter 12
“It’s yours if you want it.” Jim Koeppel, the director of the Wildlife Ecology Center in Wisconsin, pushed a letter across the desk toward Bryce. “The Board is pleased with your work and would like to offer you the directorship when I retire.”
Bryce grinned. “That’s very flattering. But I’m no administrator and my work is out in the field.”
“Your work on the wolves is getting a lot of attention, Bryce. Make the most of it.”
“Meaning?”
“Someone like you at the helm of the Wildlife Center would create all the publicity it needs for Federal funding.
Because, let’s face it, the bottom line is the important thing when it comes to the viability of an organization.” Jim’s face lit up with a smile obviously meant to coax Bryce.
Bryce laughed. He liked the kindly, dignified man, who would soon retire as director, and who had just paid him the compliment of naming him as successor.
“Thanks for your trust in me, Jim. But I have to decline the offer. Besides, I’m moving to the State of Washington to do a gray wolf study there.” As far away from Leanna as possible, at least for the time being, until he sorted out his mixed feelings.
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“None of my business, Bryce, but is something the matter?” A look of concern crossed Jim’s age-lined face.
Bryce looked up from the paperweight he’d been handling idly. “Why do you ask?”
“Seems to me, you’ve been preoccupied since your return from Pelican Harbor.”
A grim smile quirked his mouth. “It’s a personal matter which I’ve been trying to sort out.”
“A matter of the heart?”
Bryce nodded, reluctance making him cautious.
“I see. I can understand that. I’ve had first hand experience, when I nearly lost Madge to another man.”
He got up as Bryce rose to leave. “I hope you’ll reconsider the offer of the directorship.” Jim gave him a pat on the shoulder.
“I certainly will. But I don’t know that I’ll think any differently about it. Thanks all the same.” He moved toward the door.
Bryce left the whitewashed building, Jim’s words about the directorship ringing in his ears. The ache and longing was far worse than anything he had experienced before. The bright intellectual chasing after his life’s ambition was now stagnant with heartbreak. Such a thing was possible, as he was finding out. No one could hurt him like Leanna; he knew that now.
And Kai. God, how he missed her! He wondered if Leanna had told Kai who he really was. He wondered, too, if Kai was hurt he’d left so abruptly.
Bryce inserted the key into the ignition with a sharp motion and turned it, and then turned into the busy main thoroughfare. He tried to concentrate on the traffic lights. But images flashed in his head just as surely as if they were beating against the windshield of his vehicle. Images of Leanna sitting at his computer lost in the meaningless data he’d thrown at 189
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her. It was a wonder she didn’t have to get reading glasses, considering the hours she spent inputting tables and figures.
And the way Kai loved being carried so that she could pretend to be taller than he.
Bryce drove as if the jeep was on autopilot, except his knuckles stretched tight over the steering. What was he thinking when he’d mouthed words that could have only caused her pain?
* * * *
Leanna watched as the mug filled with frothy hot chocolate before she shut the tap. She noticed with satisfaction that the cold weather brought more and more customers into the snack bar. She had Carly, the new girl, helping her.
Alice’s talent in running the gift store had resulted in increased sales.
Leanna handed the mugs of hot chocolate to a couple of young men from the lumber company across the road. She then wiped down the counter top and put away the rag.
Yes, things were definitely picking up at The Tug. By dint of hard work, she’d made herself a successful businesswoman surrounded by her family. So what if an unfulfilled aspect of her life lay before her like a long stretch of empty road? She’d get over not seeing Bryce again, given time.
Customers started to leave. She’d extended the closing time to six o’clock and it pleased her to find them lingering until the last moment.
“I’m bushed,” she said to Alice. She
wasn’t sure how much it had to do with being busy and how much with missing Bryce. The hollowness in her heart just didn’t seem to go away.
“Why don’t you go home? I’ll lock up.”
“Thank you, Alice. Ready to go, Kai?”
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Every afternoon, after daycare, Leanna would pick up Kai, and together they’d go home to have lunch. And then they’d bring Cody back with them to The Tug.
“I have good news.” Alice’s eyes grew round with delight.
“Chester and I are getting married.”
Leanna whirled around from the window she’d just secured.
“That’s great,” she said, giving Alice a hug.
“Thank you, dear. It took some doing.” Alice beamed, happiness flooding her face.
“I can imagine! Dad isn’t one to take a hint. When’s the big day?”
“Not sure.” Alice put the tray back and locked the cash register. “You’re the first person I’ve told.”
“Alice is going to be your new Grammy,” Leanna said, helping Kai pick up her toys.
“Will you come visit Mommy and me after you be my Grammy?”
“Of course. Always and forever,” Alice assured her. She glanced at Leanna. “What about you?”
Leanna let Kai and Cody walk on ahead of them and stood by the door. “There’s nothing about me. I told Bryce about Kai.”
“How did he take it?”
“He was pleased that Kai is his daughter. But me, that’s another matter.” Leanna grimaced, thinking about the hard set of Bryce’s jaw when they’d talked last.
Alice shook her head. “Maybe it’ll all work out. Fingers crossed.”
Leanna said nothing and walked out the door to catch up with Kai and Cody. It would take more than crossed fingers for her life to straighten out, for the heartache to heal. Only, this time, there was much more to heal.
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* * * *
Leanna picked up clothes, cutout dolls and colored markers all jumbled together in Kai’s room, and sorted them, placing the clothes in a neat pile. A picture on the floor caught her eye. It showed Kai’s unmistakable choice of bright colors.
Another one of her “family” pictures. It had a man, a woman, a little girl, her hand on the head of a large dog. The man and woman were holding hands, and behind them shone an enormous sun, its rays almost touching the people in the picture.
Hand pressed to her face, she stared at it. Now Kai was consoling herself with drawing pictures of the family they could have been. A heaviness loomed in her chest and Leanna closed her eyes, feeling utterly miserable. She couldn’t forget the happy times they’d had together—she, Bryce, Kai and Cody.
She paged through the coloring books and found more of Kai’s “wish” pictures. So this was how she’d spent her time closeted in her room!
Leanna’s gaze drifted to a photo of herself, Kai and Cody that Chester had taken, and then she turned away.
Somewhere in Wisconsin, Bryce was continuing his study of wolves. A picture formed in her mind—the way he’d gently patted a wolf’s head after the tranquilizer took effect. She hadn’t missed the furrow of concern that etched his forehead at the time. He looked as if he were caring for a child being given medical treatment, and she remembered how she’d fought back the tears watching. He was no workaholic—she knew that now. He liked what he did just as much as she loved her creation, The Tug. He wanted to make a difference in the world the only way he knew how.
Despite being engrossed in chores, Leanna heard a car drive up. In the darkening scene outside, someone got out.
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From the unhurried, confident walk it could only be one person. Bryce.
Her mouth opened in astonishment and she stared at him.
She’d forced herself to stop thinking about him and what might have been if things had turned out differently between them. What would he be doing here now?
Leanna moved away from the window; she’d soon know what had brought him here. Maybe he’d come to take Kai from her.
The doorbell rang and she answered it.
“Bryce,” she said, trying to remain calm. “Fancy seeing you again.”
“May I come in?” he said, raising his voice to combat the sound of the wind ripping outside.
“Yes, of course,” she answered, stepping back.
He looked thinner than the last time she saw him. Bryce had a drawn look to his face. She vividly remembered his reaction to learning Kai was his daughter, and she wasn’t sure she could take his anger once again. His leaving had devastated her, and if it weren’t for Alice and her Dad, she’d never have been able to pick herself up from the blow he’d dealt her.
“Did you want something, Bryce?” She felt dull and apathetic, hardly able to talk.
“I wanted you to know something and I’d better tell you right out. I’m sorry for everything I said. My only excuse is that the surprise at learning Kai was my daughter was too much to take.”
The wind howled outside and created a symphony of sounds. A whirling noise rang out from somewhere in the back. It might have been from the back porch, where she stored the barbecue grill.
“I’d better go and check on that.” Leanna ran to where the sound led, aware that Bryce was close behind her.
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Sure enough, the tarp had flown off the grill and the lawn mower that she’d kept covered. She’d meant to ask her father to build a cover for the exposed part of the porch, but he’d been busy with his own projects.
As she fought with the tarp whipping in the wind, Leanna noticed Bryce had followed her outside. As much as she’d denied it, Leanna realized now how much she’d missed Bryce.
She’d tried to get on with her life, and she had in a fashion, but something was sorely missing. She found it harder to let him go this time.
Bryce captured the runaway tarp, bringing it back, then secured it firmly over the grill and lawn mower with a rope Leanna dredged up from some corner.
“There,” he said. “That should hold it.” He moved toward her. “You need a man around here, Leanna.”
What was he trying to tell her? She found herself hoping again, even though she knew she shouldn’t—not yet anyway.
Afraid to breathe in case she broke the spell, she waited for Bryce to continue.
“I came to ask you something. I’ve been given funding to go to Seattle but,” he took her in his arms, “I told them I’d like to set up a small scale research center here in Pelican Harbor instead. After all, I have to consider my wife’s lifestyle, too.”
Leanna felt the uncertainty rise again every time a new hope arose. Her lips parted but she was unable to speak.
Bryce solved the problem by dropping a kiss on her parted lips and holding her close, and that reassured her a little.
Moments later, she found her voice. “You…what?”
Leanna looked into his eyes through a watery veil. “I didn’t hear that last part.”
“Will you marry me?” he said, his face softening into a smile. “You and Kai, the whole kit and caboodle.”
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“I never dreamed I’d hear you say that,” Leanna said quietly. “But even if I agreed I couldn’t let you languish here on Pelican Harbor, when you had your heart set on Seattle.”
Despite her caution, her spirits sang. Kai would have her father back. Strangely, in the past months, her independence as a businesswoman had seemed to matter less to her, even though she’d tried to convince herself that wasn’t true.
“I can’t let you abandon The Tug, after the way you’ve worked to build it up.”
She walked back into the living room with Bryce’s arm around her shoulder, feeling its protective comfort.
“I know it means a lot to you. I wouldn’t ask you to give it up.” The velvet harmony of his voice poured
over her.
Leanna looked up, basking in the warmth and sincerity of his words and savoring them. “You…mean that?”
Bryce looked down at her, his eyes bright with love. “Of course. You put your heart into it, like everything you do.”
He lifted her face gently with his finger. “So what do you say?”
“Yes,” Leanna said with a quiet conviction. “With all my heart.”
He covered her mouth with a long kiss, and she returned it with the pent up longing of the last few months. Who was she kidding? She needed him, and so did Kai.
Moments later, she gently wriggled out of his embrace. “I have to pick up Kai from daycare.”
“Allow me to do the honors and escort you. After all, we’re a family now,” he said.
Her heart sang to hear Bryce say those words. “Let’s go together and tell Kai about us, and that you’re her daddy.”
She shrugged into a jacket and together, they walked hand in hand to Bryce’s car.
“This is the car I drove in from Wisconsin to see you.” He opened the car door for her. “And this is the car that’s going 195
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to bring all my worldly belongings here to live and work with the two people I love the most.”
Leanna leaned toward him and he embraced her in a quick hug.
After getting Kai, they drove home and Leanna told her about her father. The child looked at Bryce shyly for a long time as if trying to make up her mind about him.
“Friends?” Bryce asked, and he lifted her out of the car and carried her into the house as easily as one would pick up a doll. Soon, he, Kai and Cody were rolling on the carpet and Leanna stood back enjoying the scene.
* * * *
A month later, they were neither in Wisconsin nor Pelican Harbor, but in Hawaii, catching the balmy trade winds and listening to the energizing drumbeat of the dancers under a full moon.
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