Cross My Heart

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Cross My Heart Page 19

by Phyllis Halldorson


  "Yes, he does, and he asked me to make every effort to persuade you to accept."

  Damn him! Why couldn't he leave her alone! Did he get some sort of perverted kick out of having two women falling at his feet? Well, she'd show him.

  "Mrs. Sterling—"

  "Please call me 'Grace'."

  "Grace, if I do come, may I bring an escort?"

  There was a slight pause, but when Clint's mother answered there was approval in her tone. "Yes, of course you may, and bring Janey. This won't be a riotous affair. Several people are bringing children. We've arranged for a hostess and a clown so the little ones can have their own party around the wading pool. We'll expect you about six."

  By Saturday evening Elyse was a bundle of nerves. She's spent the past three days trying to think of a socially acceptable excuse for not going to the Sterlings', but short of coming down with a communicable disease there was none. She was Liz's only family, and she couldn't let her sister down.

  Ferris Rogers had readily agreed to escort her. He knew she'd dated Clint a few times, but not that they'd been engaged.

  With Liz's more knowledgeable help she'd chosen a long oyster-colored pleated skirt with a loose-fitting sleeveless overblouse in a whisper-soft gray floral print. With the outfit she wore matching hose and high-heeled sandals. The only contrast was a chunky necklace of black and oyster, and a wide black satin bow that caught her hair in the back and tamed it to cascade down between her shoulder blades.

  When Ferris arrived his eyes lit with admiration, and his long, low sexy whistle made her grin. "Hey now," he said in his pleasant tenor voice, "I always knew you were beautiful, but I never realized you were elegant, as well. What happened to the gypsy maid in the quilted skirt and wild curls who went to a movie with me Monday night?"

  Elyse laughed. "She turned into Cinderella for a few hours, but she'll be back at the stroke of midnight. Elegant just isn't the real me. It suits you, though. I've never seen you looking more handsome, Ferris. I'm proud to be with you."

  She'd spoken the truth. His dark slacks and white coat were well tailored and accentuated his blond good looks.

  When they arrived at the Sterling home the small parking lot was full of luxury cars, and more were parked along the shoulder between the road and the creek. Ferris parked his well-used but still classy black Datsun 280ZX about a block past the house in the first empty space, and they walked back.

  When they came to the bridge and steps Ferris reached down and scooped Janey into his arms. "Come on, sweetie, I'd better carry you so you don't fall into the creek or skin your pretty knees on the stairs."

  Janey, who was dressed up, too, in a navy-and-white cotton dress with a white ruffled pinafore, giggled and threw her arms around his neck.

  The door was opened by Grover, Alice's handyman husband, who apparently doubled as butler. He directed them into the great room. The place was alive with people and they filled the large space and spilled over onto the terrace. Soft background music accompanied the sounds of conversation and laughter.

  As the trio started to move toward the crowd Elyse looked up and saw Clint coming toward them. Her heart sped up, and her calm was shaken. He was so handsome in his beige linen coat and dark trousers. But his wide smile changed to a frown when he noticed Ferris standing beside her, holding Janey.

  For a moment he glared at them. Then apparently remembering his manners, he managed a reluctant half smile. "I've been watching for you, darling," he said with just a slight emphasis on the word darling, as though he wanted to be sure Ferris heard.

  Ferris eyed Elyse warily, but before she could speak Clint turned and held out his arms to Janey. "Hey, sweetheart, don't I get a hug?"

  To Elyse's surprise Janey tightened her hold on Ferris and buried her face in his shoulder.

  Ferris looked startled, and the shadow of pain in Clint's eyes was so strong it almost tore Elyse's breath from her. "Janey—" his voice couldn't completely disguise his anguish, "—what's the matter?" He put his hand gently on her small back. "What have I done? Why won't you come to me?"

  Elyse was as shocked as Clint. For a while after he'd stopped coming over Janey had asked about him every day. Elyse had made excuses—he was busy, out of town or whatever—and soon she'd stopped asking. When Elyse had told her about this party at Clint's home, Janey had shown only mild interest instead of the wild enthusiasm Elyse had expected at the prospect of her seeing her beloved Clint again. It had surprised Elyse, but she'd been so upset at the same prospect that she hadn't registered a problem.

  She was almost undone by the effect Janey's rejection had on Clint, and she spoke more sharply than she'd intended. "Janey, you're being rude. Answer Clint."

  "No, Elyse, please let me handle this." Clint tenderly lifted Janey out of Ferris's arms and cradled her against him. "Now tell me, baby, what did I do to make you angry with me?"

  Janey wouldn't look at him. "You didn't come and see me. You don't like me anymore."

  Clint quickly turned his back on Elyse and Ferris, but not before she caught the torment her daughter's remark had caused him. "Excuse me," he said in a choked tone, and walked away with Janey clutched in his arms.

  Ferris looked at Elyse. "Is there something I should know about?"

  Elyse pressed her lips together to keep them from trembling. "It—it's just that Janey got very attached to Clint while he and I were going together, and I guess when we stopped dating she was more upset than I realized."

  Ferris took her arm. "It looks as though all three of you are pretty upset," he murmured. "Come on, let's find our host and hostess and introduce ourselves."

  They waded into the crowd, but got only halfway across the room before Liz caught up with them. "Hi," she said, looking radiant in peach chiffon, "I didn't see you come in. Did you bring Janey?"

  It was Ferris who answered. "Hello, Liz. Yes, we brought her, but Senator Sterling ran off with her… I haven't had a chance to wish you and your husband happiness."

  Liz smiled. "Thanks, Ferris. Paul's around here somewhere. Come and let me introduce you to my father- and mother-in-law."

  They elbowed their way through the press of people, and out to the terrace, where an older couple were surrounded by guests. The woman reached out to Liz as she approached them and took her hand. "Elizabeth, my dear," she said, "this has got to be your sister, Elyse. I recognize her from Clint's description."

  "Yes," Liz said, "this is my baby sister and her friend Ferris Rogers."

  Grace Sterling was in her early sixties, but her delicate face was unlined and there was only a trace of gray in her dark hair. Her eyes were as green as Clint's, and her mint green designer gown couldn't be larger than a size six.

  Shyly Elyse shook hands. "I've looked forward to meeting you, Mrs. Sterling. I do hope Clint's description was kind."

  The other woman's eyes twinkled. "I thought we'd agreed that you'd call me 'Grace,' and Clint's description wasn't kind, it was truthful. He said you were the most beautiful woman he'd ever known."

  Elyse could feel her face flush and tears sting her eyes, but Grace quickly changed the subject and introduced her to her husband, Burton, then greeted Ferris.

  Burton Sterling was an older version of Clint, but with brown eyes and white hair. He sat in a wheelchair and made no apology for not standing. "So you're Elyse," he boomed. "Welcome to the family. Lean down here and give me a hug. I'm not so old yet that I can't enjoy kissing a pretty girl."

  Elyse laughed and leaned down into his embrace as she kissed him on the cheek. "Now I know where the Sterling sons get their charm," she teased.

  A familiar voice from behind made her jump and straighten. "And this is the third gorgeous Haley female. Janey say hello to my dad and mom."

  It was Clint, still holding Janey, but now she was all smiles, although Clint still looked shaken.

  He put the child down, and while the Sterlings visited with her and with Ferris, Clint took Elyse by the arm. "I want to talk to you," he sai
d grimly.

  "But I—"

  "Now." His tone brooked no opposition. "Dad and Mother will introduce Janey to the party director, and your boyfriend can damn well look after himself."

  Elyse groaned. So it was going to be like that. Surely he couldn't be jealous! And too bad if he was—she wasn't going to be a martyr for any man.

  As they made their way slowly through the crowded great room she caught a glimpse of Dinah Jefferson talking to one of Sacramento's TV anchormen. She also recognized the secretary of state, a woman who had championed several women's rights issues, and the colorful and controversial speaker of the assembly.

  Clint ushered her into the den and shut the door. "Sit down," he said tightly, and motioned toward the couch.

  She sat on a chair, instead, but he continued to stand.

  "Elyse, I'm surprised and disappointed. I wouldn't have believed that you'd turn Janey against me. You know how special she is to me."

  Elyse gasped and her eyes widened with disbelief. "I don't know what you're talking about."

  He walked away from her and looked out the window. "Why did you tell her I was too busy to see her?"

  "I didn't. I…" Yes, she had, but not in those words. "Clint," she said softly, "if that's what she thought, I'm truly sorry. She kept asking why you didn't come, and I just couldn't tell her that you wouldn't be coming to see us anymore—"

  He whirled around to face her. "Why would you even consider telling her a thing like that? The only reason I didn't come was that you asked me not to. It certainly wasn't because I didn't want to see her or you."

  He ran his hand through his hair. "My God, I'm beginning to wonder if women ever know what they want. First Dinah tells me she expected me to come looking for her after she told me emphatically she wouldn't marry me, then left the state. Now I find out that you've let Janey think I was too busy to come and see her after you told me to stay away. Dammit, I'm not a mind reader!"

  "You mean Dinah was just playing games with you when she left?" Elyse asked, outrage in every syllable.

  He shrugged. "Not exactly, but when I made no effort to find her she didn't feel she could come back, even though she now admits she wanted to."

  He smacked his fist into the palm of his hand. "It's such a waste. If she'd just picked up the phone and told me where she was I'd have gone to her and brought her back, but without any sign from her I assumed she was staying away because that's how she wanted it."

  Elyse hadn't realized she'd still retained a glimmer of hope until that hope was shattered along with her heart. Dinah still wanted Clint. She'd come back to repair the damage she'd done to their relationship earlier, and Elyse had stood back meekly and let her do it.

  She didn't notice that Clint had moved until she realized he was standing directly in front of her. She lifted her head and met his cold gaze. "Now," he said, "suppose you tell me your excuse. Why didn't you call and tell me Janey wanted to see me? I would have made arrangements to spend time with her. In fact, I'd have insisted on it."

  Elyse didn't like the feeling of guilt that assailed her. After all, she wasn't the one who was in love with someone else. "How was I to know you'd be interested? According to the newspaper you've been spending most of your time squiring Dinah around Sacramento."

  She couldn't miss the look of disgust that settled in his eyes. "And you believe everything you read in the papers?"

  She jutted out her chin. "Usually, yes, unless I have reason to believe otherwise. And I didn't notice a retraction."

  "It wasn't important enough to bother making a fuss." He turned away. "I notice you didn't waste any time replacing me in both your life and Janey's. Who's Ferris Rogers and how long have you known him?"

  Elyse stood. They were just hurting each other and getting nowhere. "I don't think that's any of your business, Clint. You've got what you've wanted for so long. Dinah's back and willing to marry you, so grab her before she changes her mind again."

  She walked past him and out of the room.

  The next day Elyse painted faces on dolls. Slow delicate work that took every ounce of her concentration and left no time for what-ifs and could-have-beens. She knew she'd have to get a firm grip on her emotions and steel herself to see Clint occasionally without coming unglued. It would be unforgivable of her to destroy the loving relationship between him and Janey, and since he was also a member of Liz's family now, it would be impossible to avoid him without seeming childish.

  On Monday she cut out clothes for the dolls, and in the afternoon she sat down in front of the television to sew. This was a restful job since she could stitch and watch television or listen to the radio at the same time. Janey had been put down later than usual for her nap, so she was still sleeping at four o'clock when Elyse switched the channel to the popular interview program that aired on a Sacramento station at that hour.

  She was only paying partial attention, when suddenly the screen went black and big bold letters that spelled NEWS BULLETIN appeared. A male voice broke in.

  "We interrupt this program to bring you a news bulletin. State Senator Clinton Sterling was shot as he left the Capitol View Restaurant, where he had earlier given a speech on the need for gun control legislation at a luncheon meeting sponsored by a local businessmen's association."

  Elyse's cry of horror was drowned out by the loud, rapid voice of the announcer.

  "The senator has been taken by ambulance to Sutter General Hospital, but as yet there is no word on his condition."

  "Repeat. Senator Clinton Sterling has been shot and taken by ambulance to a hospital, but as yet there is no word on his condition. We'll keep you posted on events as we learn of them."

  Chapter Thirteen

  For a moment Elyse sat rooted to the chair. Clint shot! God, no! They didn't say whether he was alive or—

  She jumped up and ran for the telephone. She had to call somebody. The police? The television station? Liz! Of course she'd call Liz. Liz would know if anybody did.

  She grabbed the telephone, but when she started to dial the number she couldn't remember it. She slammed the phone back in the cradle and reached for her index file. It slipped out of her trembling fingers and fell to the floor, scattering the little cards in all directions.

  She wailed a curse and dropped to her knees as hysteria clawed at her quivering nerve ends. If anything happened to Clint she couldn't bear it. Dear God, don't let him die!

  She scooped the cards into a pile, but her hands were shaking so that she scattered them again when she tried to pick them up. She was crying hysterically, too shaken to reason, when the phone rang.

  It was Liz. But Elyse was too upset to do more than scream Clint's name into the phone.

  "He's alive, Elyse," her sister assured her. "Now calm down and listen to me. He's at the hospital and he's unconscious, but the bullet didn't hit anything vital. Honey, please, try to stop crying. They'll be taking him into surgery almost immediately. Paul and I are leaving for the hospital, and Grover Irwin is driving Dad and Mother Sterling in. Sweetie, don't cry so hard. Maybe I should send Paul on to the hospital and come up there to be with you."

  "No!" Elyse shouted. "I want you… to go… to the hospital. That's the only way… I have of… knowing what's going on." She was making a massive effort to get control of herself.

  "Will you be all right?" Liz sounded worried and indecisive.

  "Yes, just call me as soon as you know anything. Promise, Liz!"

  "Of course. I've got to run now. Paul's waiting to leave."

  For a long time after she hung up the phone, Elyse sat huddled on the floor with her face buried in her knees and her arms wrapped around her legs. Her whole body shook with deep hurting sobs that nearly tore her apart.

  What a fool she'd been. What a blind, stupid idiot. She'd behaved as though time were a friend instead of the enemy. She of all people should have known that there's no guarantee of tomorrow. Hadn't she already had her nice secure future blasted all to hell once?

&nb
sp; When Jerry had died she'd vowed she would never again put off what she could do immediately, but then Clint had come into her life, and she'd felt secure again. She forgot that you had to grab what you wanted and hold on to it. That tomorrow might be too late.

  Why hadn't she just accepted Clint's assurance that he loved her and gone ahead with the engagement announcement? What difference did it make if he loved Dinah, too? Once they were married she could have made him forget about the other woman. She'd have loved him so much that he wouldn't have needed anyone else. But no. She had to have it all. She'd insisted on all or nothing, without ever stopping to think that nothing could be so irrevocably permanent.

  No, Clint wasn't going to die. Life couldn't be that cruel. She couldn't lose Clint as she had Jerry. She could eventually heal, even if Clint married Dinah, if she knew he was healthy and happy. But if he died, a large part of her would die with him.

  Her sobs finally spent, she got up and went into the bathroom, where she blew her nose and washed her face. Her skin was blotchy and her eyes were red with weeping, but she couldn't stay here and wait for the phone to ring. She was going to the hospital in Sacramento. She had to be there, even if she couldn't see Clint.

  Half an hour later Elyse was tearing down the freeway in her blue Mustang at well over the legal speed limit. Her most trusted baby-sitter had been available and had responded immediately when Elyse had called. Elyse had changed from her paint-spattered jeans into a cotton skirt and blouse, hastily applied lipstick to her colorless lips and arranged for the sitter to spend the night if necessary.

  It seemed to her that the drive took forever, yet it was only little more than an hour from the time the news bulletin broke into the television program until she turned off the highway in downtown Sacramento and drove to the hospital where Clint was battling for his life.

  The area around the building was chaotic. Aside from the normal rush-hour traffic, the streets were clogged with news trucks, cars and equipment. Elyse parked in the public parking lot under the freeway and ran the block to the entrance, where she was stopped by a security guard. "Sorry, ma'am," he said, "but unless you have authorized business I'll have to ask you to come back later."

 

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