by Regina Frame
I turned to face the asshole behind the voice. He was a short guy that was as round as he was tall. He looked like Howdy fucking Doody, and that shit eating grin on his face told me he'd gotten the reaction that he'd hoped for when he lifted his expensive camera and began clicking off pictures at warp speed.
"Is that why you've been seen cozying up to Honor Collins? Are you hoping to further your career through her?"
That did it. I snapped and punched him square in the nose, knocking him to the ground. Blood poured down his face and coated his fingers where he held his broken nose. I reached down and picked up his expensive camera and threw it, breaking it into hundreds of pieces.
"Hey! You're gonna pay for that!" he shouted.
My heart thundered in my chest and my vision blurred. The sounds of cameras clicking and the roar of voices became a dull roar in my head. The next thing I knew, I was being handcuffed and thrown into the back of a police cruiser. I was almost certain I'd been set up by the media. They were nothing but blood thirsty scumbag bottom feeders! Where the hell was Gil? He'd probably been trampled on by the mob of fans, or maybe he saw his out and took it. Leaving me to fend for myself.
***
Honor
We all sat around the front of the bus, talking and laughing as it swayed and bounced through miles and miles of road construction. It never failed. Whenever I traveled there, there always seemed to be roadwork somewhere along the way. At least I wasn't having to drive this time.
The guys were filling me in on some of the crazy fans they'd come in contact with over the last few years. Well, two of them were actually women from one of their cover bands. They snuck on the bus after they finished their set and pretended to be wives of two of the guys and caused a big fight between some of the groupies. Those were the same women that caused problems for Linc and Honesty. I'd seen a small sampling of the craziness, and I couldn't imagine how they must have felt.
"Oh man! Chance, remember when you were getting your dick sucked by that one chick and she stuck her finger up your ass?" Levi slapped the table and hooted with laughter.
"Dude, why have you got to bring that shit up? Honor doesn't want to hear about that," he growled.
"O-oh" I squealed with excitement. I was enjoying all these crazy stories they were sharing. "I gotta hear this."
Levi wiped the tears from his eyes and continued.
"You could hear him scream all the way to the front of the bus. He sounded like a damn girl. He came running up the aisle with his pants around his ankles, dick flopping in the breeze, and fell flat on his face!" Everyone was laughing by now, including me. "For days after that, we left him little gifts on his bunk." He snickered again.
"What kind of gifts?" I was curious, and enjoying the story way too much.
"Things like lube, hemorrhoid cream, a twelve inch dildo, and an inflatable doughnut cushion."
Chance's face was flaming red with embarrassment, and probably a little anger to go along with it.
"A lot of guys like it when a woman does that to them. I've heard it makes it more enjoyable," I told him with a huge smile on my face.
"There was nothing enjoyable about it. That hole is for exit only!" he barked out before flipping us the bird and pushing himself up off the sofa.
"Oh, come on, Chance. We're just having a little fun.”
"I'll remember this, Sparkles," he promised, not being able to hold back the curve of his lips.
"It's all in fun, man." Jinx snickered.
"Hardee-har-har!" He waved his hand in the air. "I'm going to bed, you bunch of assholes."
We were still laughing as he disappeared down the hall and climbed into his bunk. The same bunk I'd be crawling in to in just a few more minutes.
"What about the time Linc invited that chick back to the bus for cunalingus?" Jinx joked, snapping his fingers as if he was trying to remember something. "She thought he was talking about a card game." When he figured it out that she was clueless, he said, ‘I'm gonna eat your pussy while you suck my dick’." Jinx wrapped his arms around his midsection and laughed so hard he could barely finish the story. "She must have been with some religious cult or something, because no one can be that naive. She turned deathly pale and ran out of the bus as fast as she could go. She even left her shoes behind."
I laughed so hard the beer that I'd been drinking came out of my nose. Not very lady like.
***
An hour later, I yawned and checked the time on my phone. It was two in the morning, and I needed to try and get some sleep. I'd sat around listening to the guys tell story after story about their experiences on the road, long after Chance hit his bunk.
I had intentionally stayed up in hopes of tiring myself out enough to fall asleep. It was my first experience at sleeping on the bus, and I wasn't sure if I'd be able to or not. I was too aware of the traffic surrounding us and the hum of the tires on the highway, but when I climbed in the bunk beside Chance, I was pleasantly surprised.
He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me close, cradling me against his warm body. The spicy scent of his cologne had quickly become something that I loved. I craved it. In just a few short moments, my body relaxed in to him and the sound of Chance's breath against my ear lulled me to sleep.
***
Chance
AFTER CONCERT
I can't believe my fucking eyes. If I were high, I'd blame it on the drugs, but I'd really tried hard lately for Honor. But, judging by the sight before me, my night had just gone to shit.
I never thought I'd see her again, and to be honest, I wish she wasn't there now. My heart slammed against my chest as I stood stiff as a board before the woman. She looked deathly ill with her pale skin and sunken cheeks. She was nothing like the woman I remembered when I was five. Her watery green eyes were watching me with curiosity, and something that looked a lot like fear.
"Chance, son," she choked out as a tear rolled down her pale face. She reached out a trembling hand, reaching for me. My body jerked as I took a couple of steps back out of her reach.
"Don't you fucking call me that," I snarled, causing her to gasp in surprise at my tone. "You don't get to call me son. You gave up that privilege the day you walked out. The day you left me with that monster!”
I had so many emotions spiraling through me at the moment that I didn't notice all the people gathered around. Band members, fans, even some of the road crew. "Do you have any idea what he did to me? Do you?" I spat, my voice laced with anger. She stood frozen, with eyes as big as saucers. "He used me as an ashtray." Her hand shot to her mouth as a gasp escaped, but I didn't care. Let this shit sink in. "That's right. He put out his cigarette on my back, my legs, and my arms."
I held up my heavily tattooed arm where the burn scars were hidden beneath the ink. I traced my fingers over the numerous pits in my skin. "That went on for years. Fucking years!" I shouted, spittle flying from my mouth. By now the tears streaming down her face dotted the faded gray tee shirt she was wearing. "You have no idea how many scars I have, and when I was seven, he broke my arm all because I forgot to turn off the kitchen light when I finished with the dishes."
I heard a loud gasp, and turned to find Honor standing there, frozen in place with her hand covering her mouth, tears streaming down her beautiful face. Shit! The last thing I wanted to see was pity on the faces of those closest to me.
"I'd been better off if you'd dropped me on a stranger's doorstep." A sarcastic laugh rolled from my tongue, and I shook my head in disbelief. Disbelief that the woman was standing in front of me now after all these years like nothing had ever fucking happened. "Why didn't you just hang a sign around my neck that said ‘Free to good home’?" I took a painful breath and continued. "You could've dropped me off in the middle of the damn interstate and I'd been safer.
"There's only two people in my life who have ever cared about me, and you're not one of them." I balled my hands into fists and dug my nails into my palms. "So excuse the hell out of me if I don't fal
l at your feet." I was so mad now that I was shaking all over. She took a step forward and reached for me again. She had a lot of damn nerve.
"Don't fucking touch me," I spat.
"I'm so sorry, Chance. Your dad wasn't easy to live with, and I had a drug problem. Believe me, I'm not proud of that."
I barked out a sarcastic laugh. How fucking ironic.
"Well, that's good to know. At least I came by it honest."
I felt someone's hand on my arm, tugging at me. Jinx.
"Let's go, buddy. You don't want to do this here," he said, tilting his head in the direction of the crowd surrounding us.
Fuck! Some of them were gawking in shock while others had their cell phones out, recording the whole damn thing no doubt. This shit show was like a damn train wreck. Up until right now, no one but Jinx knew about what happened to me, and now I could count on it being all over social media Everyone would know just how pathetic Chance Roberts really was.
That was why I had trust issues. The reason I'd always kept my distance. Because the one person I cared for the most had pity written all over her beautiful face. Honor.
"Chance, son..." Her voice was pleading. "I'm so sorry," she said, peering at me through bloodshot eyes. "You don't understand." I laughed in her face. Really?
"What's there to understand? Please tell me, Vicky."
She winced at the use of her name instead of me calling her mom. I couldn't give two shits about her feelings. Why should I? She certainly didn't think about mine when she walked out and left me on my fucking birthday.
"Come on, Chance. Let's go." Jinx tried to pull me away, but I was not having it. I was anchored to the damn floor, and I was not leaving until I had said everything fucking thing I'd ever thought about saying to her.
"I had to leave. I had every intention of coming back for you, but . . ."
I cut her off before she could finish.
"I don't want to hear your sorry ass excuses, because they mean shit to me. As far as I'm concerned, you're as low as they come. You may have given birth to me, but you were never a mother," I grit out between clenched teeth. "And don't give me that shit about how you were coming back for me," I hissed.
Her eyes moved to mine, and her lower lip began to tremble. Good. I wanted to hurt her as much as I had been, so I left her with four final words, "You're dead to me."
Jinx grabbed one arm, and Levi the other. Finally relenting, I let them lead me to the dressing room. I didn’t even remember walking down the long hallway to get there.
Someone shoved a bottle of Jack in my hand, and I welcomed it. I unscrewed the top and tossed it back, downing the whole damn bottle in three large gulps. It burned like fire going down, but right now I welcomed it, because that meant I didn’t have to deal with all the shit currently taking up space in my head.
Jinx walked across the room and pulled his cell from his pocket. Who he was calling, I hadn't a clue, and really didn't give a fuck at the moment. Levi pulled up a chair in front of me and straddled it.
"I don't know what's going on, and you don't have to tell me, but you need to know I'm here for you, man. Anything you need," he promised.
I sat there with my elbows propped on my knees and cradled my head in my hands. It wasn't until her warm hand gripped my bare arm that I realized Honor was sitting beside me.
I fought the urge to look at her, because I was afraid of what I'd see when I looked into her eyes. How could she care about me now? Now that she knew how broken I was. How pathetic I was that my own damn parents didn't want me.
"What's she even doing in Denver? Is this where she's been all these damn years?" I mumbled, gripping the sides of my head.
I shot to my feet, startling Honor and Levi in the process. At the moment, I didn't care. I had one thing on my mind and one thing only. And that was to get that bitch’s face and her words out of my head.
I stormed into the nearest bathroom and kicked the door closed with my foot. I shoved my hand in my pocket and dug out the baggie full of pills. I'd been trying to cut back on the drugs for Honor, but at the moment, that didn't even matter. I popped several Xanax in my mouth and chewed, the bitter taste coating my tongue and the back of my throat.
"What the fuck?!" I shouted at my reflection in the mirror. "You're a pathetic piece of shit. You should just swallow the rest of them and do us all a favor and do yourself in." I sneered, swaying on my feet. By the time I made it out of the bathroom, I was already staggering with each step and slurring my words. Actually, my mouth was moving but no sound was coming out. I was seriously fucked up.
I stirred sometime later, cracking my eyes open and seeing a curtain of silky blonde hair in front of me. I sighed, burying my face in the soft strands and breathing in the sweet scent of vanilla. The bus was quiet except for the sound of her breathing.
Funny. I didn’t even remember walking to the bus, nor the bus ride home. I'd been out the whole time.
***
I rounded the corner to the kitchen, and came to a screeching halt when I saw Honor's half naked ass. She had her head in the fridge, looking for something. I was not sure what. She was wearing a tee shirt and a thong, judging by the bare ass cheeks.
"Good morning, Sparkles."
She jumped, banging her head on the freezer door.
"Shit!" she shouted, rubbing the back of her head. "What the fuck? Why are you sneaking up on me?"
"I was just coming for coffee. It's not my fault your naked ass was up in the air. It looks delicious, by the way." I winked.
"I'm not naked! I'm wearing panties." She grinned and lifted the bottom of her tee shirt, flashing me a hint of the sheer material.
"You teasing me, Sparkles?"
I pulled my bottom lip between my teeth, tugging at my lip ring. Her smoldering gaze raked over my naked chest before moving lower. My dick was getting harder by the minute. I grinned and gave her a wink before moving around her to grab some coffee.
"You didn't seem to mind last night."
She smiled, raking her finger down the center of my chest and stopping at the waistband of my shorts. I leaned in and kissed her, sucking on her bottom lip and causing her to moan. That one little sound did me in every time. She shoved her hand down my shorts and grabbed my dick, giving it a stroke, just as the doorbell chimed.
"Mother fuck!" I growled, holding her wrist when she tried to pull free from my dick. It felt too damn good, and whoever was at the door could fucking wait.
"I've got to get the door." She managed to break free from my hold on her, causing me to curse again. "It's Jinx. He texted earlier and said he needed to come by."
"Why didn't he just text me?"
"Because he knew you'd just ignore him the way you've been doing for the past week," she replied.
She was right. I'd managed to avoid everyone except Honor for the last week, because I knew the topic of conversation and I really didn't want to talk about it, little alone think about it. She reached for the door handle, but I stopped her before she could open the door. I shook my head.
"What?"
I pointed in her direction. "You're not opening the damn door wearing that. He doesn't get to see that fine ass."
She exhaled a heavy sigh and rolled her eyes at me.
"Fine," she muttered, and then squealed when I landed a slap on her bare ass cheek.
"It's about damn time. It's hotter than hell out there," Jinx remarked as I flung the door open and he pushed past me and into the air conditioning.
"I was about to get lucky. I hope you know you fucked that up for me." I grumbled at him. "Coffee?" I offered, picking my cup up off the counter and sipping it.
"Sounds good." He took a seat at the kitchen table and tossed what looked like a magazine on top. "You need to see this." He pointed at the offending book.
"I have no desire to see whatever the hell that is. I'm pretty sure it's all lies, anyway."
"What's that?" Honor questioned.
I hadn't seen her walk back in. Tha
nk God she was wearing a pair of leggings and had on a bra now. She gave me a knowing smirk before grabbing herself a cup of coffee and taking a seat next to me.
"Ever since what happened in Denver, there has been a lot of talk. Our answering service can barely keep up, and there's not a day that goes by that there's not some type of article speculating and what went on."
Honor picked up the magazine and began to thumb through it. I didn't want to see it; didn't even want it in my damn house.
"Let them speculate all they damn want," I bit out. Jinx shook his head.
"There are offers that I think you need to think about. Consider sitting down for an interview . . . "
"Fuck that! I can't believe I'm hearing this shit; from you of all people, Jinx."
"Just hear me out." It took every bit of strength that I had to not punch my best friend in the damn face, but when Honor laid her hand on my thigh, it had a calming effect. It had been that way since the day I met her. She just projected a positive energy. It was hard to explain, because I'd never met anyone that had that effect on me. "You've seen enough over the past three years to know how the paparazzi can spin a story, and right now, they're not painting you in a very good light." He paused to take a sip of his coffee. "Right now, it's looking like you're the out of control rockstar who refused his mother."
I gritted my teeth and glared at my friend. "Fuck them, and fuck you, too, for wanting to put me through that," I snapped.
I had to hand it to Jinx, because he kept his cool. "I know what this is doing to you. You know that I do. I'm just asking you to think about it and let me know. I'll try and hold them off as long as I can." He stood from the table, pushing the chair back.
"There's nothing to fucking think about, because the answer is no. Today. Tomorrow, and the day after that. The answer is fuck no!" I shouted.