“I’m sorry,” he said, his voice cracking. “I’m so goddamn sorry. I never should have left. I broke my promise.”
I didn’t answer, not caring about anything but the fact that he was here, that he’d come, that I didn’t have to give him up, that I wouldn’t. “Tara,” he said, pulling back slightly and gripping my face. “There’s something you need to know.”
“You’re back,” I said. “That’s all I need to know.”
He smiled at me. “No, that’s not all.” Then he rose to his feet, and set me on mine. He moved out of the way and pointed to a man standing along the tree line behind us.
I stared, then I blinked, then I stumbled forward just as my brother opened his busted lips and said, “Hey.”
I surged forward, running toward Bryan until I collided with his chest. He went back a step, his arms wrapping around me, the ones I’d felt since I was a kid, the ones I knew would keep me safe. And that was when I went limp and burst into big, fat, ugly sobbing tears that echoed off the trees.
Sixteen
Lance
There were few decisions in life where I could look back and definitely say that I’d made the right call. Turning that car around to come back to Tara and saving Bryan along the way was unequivocally the best decision ever.
Her whole body bucked with sobs, as she clung to her brother. He met my gaze over her shoulder, tears streaming down his battered face. He nodded once, and I felt that in my soul. That was him backing down, that was him finally relinquishing hold of Tara and letting her forge her own life. It meant something to me that he’d stood back to let Tara see me first.
I gave them time, and waited for them to finish murmuring some quiet words to each other. Bryan nodded his head to me, and she whipped around, her eyes wide in her face. “You saved him?”
“Something tells me he might have gotten out of that one on his own,” I said.
“Oh, now you’re modest?” Bryan gave Tara another squeeze before he helped her place her feet back on the ground.
“Fine, I saved your ass,” I grunted.
Reb’s voice carried across the clearing to us, something vile he hurled at the men holding guns on him, and I remembered. Like a shot of adrenaline, I remembered what that man took from me (Trent), what he’d tried to take from me (Tara), and what he tried to take from Tara (Bryan).
I strode toward Reb, my fists clenched at my sides. Bryan must have had the same idea, because he fell into step beside me, his face set, that eerie half-smile he wore that signaled his anger had simmered into deadly control.
We’d been tracking Tara and Reb from the cabin with the help of Castor’s men. We’d heard the engine of the ATV, then the gunshots, and I’d given up all pretense at stealth and began to sprint toward the sounds. What I’d found was Tara on the ATV, hair wild, eyes panicked, and Reb on the ground, cursing and bleeding.
I got a better look at him now to see she’d blown out a kneecap and shot a hole in his bicep. “Damn,” I muttered, taking a moment to be damn impressed with her shot.
Reb’s face was twisted in pain, but fear was knitted through his agony as well. And that fear was reserved for Bryan.
Bryan crouched on the balls of his feet next to Reb and cocked his head. I considered myself a decently tough guy but this calm, smiling Bryan scared the shit out of me. Reb was shaking, no longer cursing, instead staring up at his former best friend like Bryan was the grim reaper.
“What were those words again?” Bryan tapped his chin. “Ah yeah, I remember now. ‘Bryan’s about to be very dead in about twenty minutes.’” He grinned huge and pointed to himself with both of his thumbs. “Well, look who’s alive, motherfucker!”
Reb didn’t get to respond, because Bryan took his gun out of his waistband and smashed the butt down onto Reb’s destroyed kneecap. Just like that. With a fucking smile on his face. Reb howled in pain. I looked behind me to see Tara watching her ex-boyfriend, barely keeping it together as she wrapped her arms around herself. She raised a teary gaze to me.
I wasn’t going to fuck up my promise to her again. Did I want to see Reb suffer? Did I want to crush his windpipe with my bare hands? Fuck yeah. But Tara was close to shock. In the last twenty-four hours she’d seen me walk away, she’d thought her brother was dead, she thought a gang leader was going to kill her, her ex-boyfriend had basically stolen her, and she’d shot him.
I stepped toward her and gathered her into my arms. She melted into me, clinging to my shirt, burrowing into my body like she wanted to fuse to me. I stroked her hair. “We can leave if you want, let Bryan take care of this.”
“It’s okay,” she whispered. “Just hold me.”
“Always,” I answered, hoping like hell this meant she forgave me for not fighting for her. I’d regret walking away from her in that diner forever.
“—Took a fall for you. I told Castor I killed Trent, when it was really you.” Bryan was saying. Tara sucked in a breath at what he was saying. “I gave you territory, gave you soldiers, gave you all the money they brought in. I didn’t even ask for a percentage. And you do this?” His hand holding the gun lowered, this time the butt slamming into Reb’s bicep and his pained shriek made Tara shudder in my arms.
“You kept insurance,” Reb spat.
“Of course I kept insurance, you fucking dick. But you know me. I would have gone to the grave with that.” He shook his head. “Oh wait! How could I have forgotten introductions?” He rose to his feet and took a step back so Reb could see where I stood with Tara. “That there is Lance. You wanna know who he is?”
Reb’s nostril flared as he took in my embrace with Tara.
“He’s Trent’s brother!” Bryan started laughing, a crazy maniacal laugh that chilled me to the fucking bone, but Tara actually semi-smiled. These Drayers were fucking nuts.
He stopped laughing long enough to cock back his knee and send his boot flying right into Reb’s lower back. The man opened his mouth in a silent scream as he arched, then rolled with a whimper.
“So, before you die,” Bryan said, checking the clip of his gun. “You’re going to know that Lance met Tara in that shit hole town she was living. The same town where I kept a safety deposit box with the proof that you killed Trent Anders. Lance and Tara met and fell in love and now he’s going to be in her bed every night in a way you never got to be.” Bryan hawked a ball of phlegm and spat it onto Reb’s chest. “The way you’ll never be. In the first ten minutes I met him, I knew he was a better man than you ever were.” Bryan licked his lips and aimed his gun at Reb’s head. “Wanna spew more shit or should I end this now?”
“Drayer.”
A deep voice boomed from the trees, and I immediately whirled to place my body in front of Tara’s. A large man emerged from the trees, flanked by over half a dozen men, all holding semi-automatic rifles. The man who spoke was huge, maybe close to seven feet, his hair shot through with silver, and his face lined with age. I placed him in his fifties, but he was ripped as fuck, his chest fucking massive. He was like a Grizzly bear in human form.
“Castor,” Bryan said, lowering the gun.
This was Castor… holy shit. No wonder he ruled New Jersey’s criminal activity. Who’d want to go up against this guy?
“I told you there’d be a marker if I helped you find your sister,” he said.
I hadn’t been allowed in that meeting, but I’d seen Bryan when he left. I knew he’d agreed to owe Castor, and Castor wasn’t anyone you wanted to owe. Bryan’s expression remained still as he answered. “Yes.”
“I am calling the marker now.”
Bryan flinched. “What?”
“Ghost is mine,” he said softly.
That wasn’t what Bryan expected. Hell, it wasn’t what I expected either. I hadn’t come here to get revenge for Trent. I knew in my heart that the best thing I could do for the memory of my brother was to be happy. And to be happy, I needed Tara.
“You’re taking this from me?” Bryan asked.
“You
wanted out of the life, yes?”
Bryan lips parted, and then he swallowed. “Yes.”
“So go, you’re free.”
“Already got a lot of blood on my hands, Castor. Hell, I killed one of Reb’s soldiers yesterday. Don’t do this for my conscience. That ship has sailed.”
Castor laughed. “Ah, but that was self-defense. This is…” he gestured to a Reb who had gone pale and listless with blood loss. “This is an execution. I think you’re trying to change down in Kentucky, yes?”
Bryan’s expression went deathly cold, and he took one step toward Castor and spoke through gritted teeth. “Don’t you fucking—”
Castor held up his hands. “I’m not in your life anymore, Drayer. Walk away, and I’ll forget you exist.” The man’s cold gaze sliced to us. “And I’ll forget everyone else in your life too.”
Bryan waited a beat before nodding. He tossed his gun to one of the men still training guns on Reb. He looked Castor square in the eye and said, “I’m out.”
He gestured to me and Tara. “Let’s go.”
We began to walk, because I didn’t really care to see what scene would happen next, and I really wasn’t too keen on Tara seeing it. Until I heard my name called. “Lance Anders.”
I turned around to see Castor watching me. Tara clung to my arm, her nails digging in. “Yeah.”
“Your brother meant a lot to my niece. She still hasn't moved on. I’d appreciate if you reached out, maybe gave her something of his to remember him. Give her closure. Yes?”
I’d give him that. For Trent. “Yes, I’ll do that.”
“Obliged.” Castor turned away from us, and that was our cue to leave. I couldn’t get out of the clearing fast enough.
Seventeen
Tara
Lance and I stood beside Bryan’s truck—another new truck, this one also white but a Ford instead of a Dodge. We’d had to walk a ridiculous amount, past the cabin where Reb had me stashed to where Lance, Bryan, and Castor’s crew had stowed their vehicles. So now we stood in a small parking area reserved for a park, which I was sure normally saw a few cars a week, and it was now full of trucks and black SUVs. Bryan stood a couple of feet away, talking to a few of Castor’s soldiers who’d helped lead us back.
Lance squeezed the back of my neck. He hadn’t stopped touching me, not since he held me while Bryan talked to Reb. I fell deeper in love with Lance the moment he’d immediately tended to me rather than get his shot at violence against Reb. He’d been thinking of me, comforting me, being with me.
He’d told me what happened—that he’d saved Bryan and together they’d gone to see Hal, Lance’s friend who was more like a father, then they met with Castor. I learned about Trent and Castor’s niece, a story which broke my heart. Castor had never been after me, and heard too late about the rumor that Reb floated. He’d agreed to help Lance and Bryan. I still couldn’t get over that the two most important men in my life—who’d met under tense circumstances—had found a way to work together.
Some more of Castor’s men emerged from the woods, and I shivered. I didn’t want to know what was happening or had happened to Reb. But he’d dug his own grave.
“So, you shot a guy?” I asked Lance, peering up into his face to gauge his reaction.
“It’s okay,” he said quietly, but I knew it wasn’t. He wasn’t like my brother.
“It will be,” I whispered, running my hand up his chest.
“Babe, I said, it’s okay.”
“And I said it will be,” I insisted.
His face changed, his features softening, because he knew I saw through to his heart. I knew that shooting that man, even to save Bryan, marked him. “I’m sorry,” he said, those dark eyes ensnaring me just like they had at the bar. His other hand cupped my cheek, his fingers brushing the bruise Reb had left behind. “I shouldn’t have left. Never should have left.”
“You didn’t know,” I said. “It’s okay.”
He smiled then, a sad smile. “I hope it will be. I don’t even know where to start. I broke my promise to you. I wasn’t there to look out for you. Again.”
Did he think I was going to be mad because he wasn’t there to be some sort of bodyguard? I didn’t get a chance to answer him, because Bryan arrived beside us, his boots crunching on the gravel of the parking lot. I hated seeing him so bruised, especially because I’d watch the kicks and the punches land. Except I’d thought he’d die that way, and so to see him standing before me, that same small smile twisting his lips, was a miracle.
“So, I guess this is it,” Bryan said. “This is when I hand her over. That was the deal, right? You save me, you get Tara.”
Excuse me? I blinked at Bryan, then at Lance, who was glaring at my brother. “Dude…”
I wasn’t something to hand over. I wasn’t a possession. “I’m sorry?” I asked. “You’ll hand me over?”
Bryan’s brows lowered. “You know what I mean.”
“No, Bryan, I don’t.” I straightened from the car, forcing Lance back with a hand on his chest, ignoring the flare of panic in his eyes. “Brother, I love you. You know I do. When I thought you were dead, I nearly gave up, and the only reason I didn’t was because you taught me to be a fighter. So you see how much losing you devastated me, right?”
Bryan glanced at Lance as if the man had answers, but finding none, he focused back on me. “Yeah, Tara. I do.”
I wasn’t angry. I was fed up. “All I ever wanted was a brother. I didn’t want a keeper. I didn’t want a provider. Yes, you filled that role when I was a kid and couldn’t do it myself, but for fuck’s sake, Bryan, I’m an adult now.” I stepped toward him, unsure where to touch him that wouldn’t cause him pain, and settled on holding his hand. My words were penetrating, I could tell because with every syllable, Bryan seemed to flinch with the blows. “All I want from you, all I’ve wanted for years, is a brother who follows the law and stays alive.” I brushed a tear off my cheek that leaked out of one eye and tried to steady my voice. “Do you understand what I’m saying? So no, you’re not going to stand here and hand me off to some other man like I now have a new ward. I don’t want my life to be determined by you, or Reb, or Lance. I want it to be determined by me.” I jabbed a finger at my chest.
Bryan tracked my movements with wet eyes, and he slowly lifted his gaze to me. “I liked taking care of you. You were the only person in my life who ever saw me as more than a piece of shit, and I guess I felt like I had to stay in that role, I had to keep it, keep you, or I wasn’t sure who the fuck I’d be.”
It was the most honest thing Bryan had ever said to me. And I regretted so damn much that we hadn’t had this discussion years ago. “You can figure it out now,” I said. “On your own. With a real job. Paying taxes!” He scrunched his nose and I laughed. “You can start a new life in Kentucky. You already have, right?”
His gaze went distant for a moment, trailing over my shoulder before snapping back to me. “Yeah. I have.”
“Good.” I let go of his hand and rounded on Lance. “Now I have some things to say to you.”
“Shit,” Lance muttered, and it was kind of cute, but I ignored that because I had words to say. “Enough with the promise. Enough with this guilt that you let me down because you didn’t watch out for me. Did I love that you kept your promise? That you saved me from a burning apartment? Damn right, I did. But we’re past that now. It’s not your job to keep me, just like it wasn’t Bryan’s job.”
“Tara—”
“Do you want to know what I want?” I snapped, my voice going slightly hysterical.
Lance didn’t back down, didn’t drop his gaze. “Of course I do.”
“I want you.” Shit, my voice cracked, and the tears were flowing now, hot and wet on my flushed skin. “I want to get in a car and I want to drive. I want to drive until we run out of gas and then I want to put down roots. Find a small house with a garage where you can make your furniture and I can find a job as a barista, or a bank teller, or what-the-fuck
-ever, it doesn’t matter because I’ll be coming home to you.” I inhaled sharply as I ran out of breath. “I want to be with you because I love you, and I know we’ll be okay, we’ll both be okay, if we’re together. So that’s what I fucking want. That’s my decision and for once in my life, I want to point the arrow of my life in the direction I chose and that arrow to actually hit the target. Can you do that for me, Lance? Can you make my arrow hit the bullseye?”
Lance lifted his chin, eyes glued to mine. “You aim, baby, and I’ll help you fire.”
I’d never heard sweeter words in my life. My chest swelled, excitement roaring up my spine until I felt like I couldn’t contain my happiness, like I was going to crack and shoot out moonbeams. I settled for smiling so big my face hurt. Lance returned that smile and opened his arms.
I ran into him, and he enclosed me in his embrace just as his lips pressed a kiss to the top of my head. I closed my eyes, enjoying a moment of peace, one of the first times in my life where I was so eager for the future not because I hoped my life would get better, but because I knew it would.
“Okay,” I mumbled again his chest. “Enough mushy stuff.”
Lance laughed and pointed to a corner of the lot. “Got your trusty Toyota still.”
There she was, dirty and sturdy. “She’ll take us where we need to go. But what about your tools?”
“I’ll talk to Hal. He’ll get them to me wherever we settle. Right now, I don’t give a fuck. We’ll go to Wal-Mart, get essentials, and drive.” His grin was huge, and without the burden of revenge weighing on his shoulders, he looked younger, handsomer.
Bryan stepped forward and handed me a phone. “I’m giving you some space. All I ask is you text me once a week to let me know you’re okay. Let me know where you settle. Then I’ll stay away, promise, until you decide you want to contact me again.”
I stared at the phone in his hand. “Bryan, I don’t—”
Hidden Truths Page 15