by Jerry
The school has an extra hour of school compared to where I taught before. The school day starts at 8:30 and goes until 3:30. I’m trying to get the school board to start thirty minutes later because I have a hard time keeping the children occupied that long. I have no problem being occupied, however. So I’ll see what the board decides. What might swing things in my favor is they already switch to a 9:00 starting time when winter arrives. Hopefully my idea will carry.
I learned something new the other day at school. One of the children, Lacie, claimed that “stolon” is a word. I said it wasn’t. She declared up and down her mom said it was. So off we went to the dictionary, and the child was correct. Poor teacher.
Saturday evening…
This finds me alone in the house again, and it’s impossible to describe the lonely feelings I have. You would have to go through this yourself to understand. I received another of your welcome letters today, and it’s always so heartwarming to hear that you still care for me. I have a problem at times believing anyone could love me, including God. I am constantly questioning my worth and coming up far short. I could never be good enough for God, or you, or anyone else. But I am trying hard to believe the fact that God cares for me even with all my faults. Maybe someday I’ll have my faith strengthened and be strong enough to fully understand and absorb His love.
I will close this letter. If I’ve said too much, your wastebasket is always handy.
With all my love,
Eugene
September 28
My dearest Naomi,
This finds me happier than I have been since I came out here. The reason lies in the fact that I’ve just been told I will get to see you over the weekend. Oh, glorious thought! Lonnie and Luella didn’t say anything to me about these plans until yesterday evening. They want to come out for a visit because they are anxious to see my home community. They thought a good time to do so would be over our communion, which is this weekend. Yippee…I shall see you soon! It’s a good thing you mentioned when communion was going to be or I would never have known.
Last night was a school board meeting. It went really well. Since it was my first one, I was a little nervous, but there was nothing to it. For one thing, they don’t have school meetings like the Amish do, where all the parents come, sit around, and take turns talking in public about their concerns. Here only the three board members attend on the first Monday evening of each month. Then twice a year there is a meeting where all the parents can come, bringing in food and playing games. During the course of the evening, each set of parents then has a chance to talk privately with the teacher.
Luella found a poem about a teacher, which she read to me the other evening, and Lonnie and I had a good laugh. The story was told to her about a teacher called Miss Blodgit who was going to spank one of her pupils. She had him stand up in front of her desk and had her stick all ready. Before Miss Blodgit started, she told the boy that if he would write a poem she wouldn’t spank him. So the student quickly rattled this poem off:
Here I stand
Before Miss Blodgit.
She’s going to hit me,
And I’m going to dodge it.
—ANONYMOUS
Janie and Amanda wanted in on the fun when Luella told them the story, so they tried to come up with a poem for me. I ended up helping them out, and this is what we came up with. Everyone got a big roar out of it.
Here I stand
Before Eugene, wary.
He’s going to spank me,
And it’s awful scary.
With love,
Eugene
September 29
My dearest Eugene,
Greetings of love!
I had a headache this morning, and I’m feeling like the flu is creeping up on me. Add to that, we are fasting this morning for communion next Sunday. I fixed breakfast for the younger ones, and I’m quite hungry.
I worked at Mrs. Bach’s in the afternoon, and this time John went with her. That left me there alone except for the dog. Dad had been there this morning to do repairs and repaint the roof on their house. I don’t think he finished painting, but the roof doesn’t leak anymore, he said.
This evening Dad went somewhere to look at two horses—workhorses I think, so he must have next spring’s work on his mind already. He isn’t back yet, and it’s 9:00. We had supper finished at 7:00. I washed the dishes and then walked down to Ada’s to play Ping-Pong with Lester and Don. It was fun.
Thursday and Friday I have to work in Salem on my babysitting jobs, as usual. I hope those two days will go zooming fast, but I doubt it.
Well, since I can’t find any more news to write I will sign off.
I wish I could see you again right now,
Naomi
* * *
OCTOBER
* * *
October 4
My dearest Naomi,
This finds me back from the weekend with you. You looked a little shocked when I walked in, and I can understand why because you’d just received my letter telling you I was coming. It was very, very good to see you. You already know of course, since I told you in person, but still I will say it again and again.
I am up in my room now, just home from school. I was longing to see you on the walk home—so much that it almost hurt.
The weather is balmy, with a nice wind out of the south. There were no clouds in the skies except my memories of you.
I’d better quit thinking about such things or I won’t be able to write any more. You made me feel so loved that it continually sends warm circles around my heart.
Thank you.
And I love you,
Eugene
October 4
My dearest Eugene,
Greetings of love!
Thank you for a most enjoyable weekend. I can’t put into words what those two days with you meant to me. When you left Sunday evening, I went into the house, turned out the light, and ran to the entrance window to watch you go out the lane in your buggy. As your buggy lights disappeared down the road, tears rolled down my cheeks.
This morning I heard someone blowing their horn as they went past on the road, and Mom hollered out, “There they go!” I quickly ran to the window and saw you before you were past Ada’s place. I hadn’t realized you’d be going past our place or I would’ve been looking for you.
I feel so empty now, but still when I think of the wonderful time we had and the joy of being with you, it also makes me happy. I guess maybe it’s possible to be happy and sad at the same time.
Mom and I fall cleaned the upstairs today. I washed and ironed afterward. Mom is determined to get everything we started done today, so she’s ironing now after supper at 7:30.
I still feel threatened by the flu bug, but thankfully it stayed away over the weekend. I think there is a lot of truth to the saying that when you’re excited or happy, you’re not nearly as apt to be sick or to give in to it as when you are sad or depressed. Oh, groans. I know it’s coming now for sure.
Tuesday evening…
I’m still feeling depressed, and I just thought, “If I ever get married to Eugene, I’ll be in heaven.” That “if I ever” sounds rather hopeless, but a wedding seems such a long way off. The longing for you is very intense right now. To see your smile would be so wonderful. Do you have any idea how handsome you look when you are happy and smiling?
I still have this flu headache, but I went to work anyway. When I came home, I ate two apples with peanut butter. At least I still have my appetite. Peanut butter has some sugar in it, I think, so I felt a little chirped up.
Wednesday…
This is Wednesday morning at 9:30. I had a bad night and don’t feel well at all this morning. Last night at 11:00, I woke with an extremely bad headache. I thought my head would split. This morning it isn’t quite as bad. Mom said I shouldn’t go to work. I’m determined not to miss work though, so I’m planning on going. Maybe I’ll feel better by 1:00, when my ride arrives.
Mom
went to the sewing this morning, so I’m in the house alone at the moment. I doubt if I’ll go tonight to the youth gathering unless I feel a lot better. Tomorrow Mom, Rosanna, Betsy, and I want to go to Bloomington to shop at a neat little dry goods store. The reason is that Elena Marshall has wanted to take us for some time. She says she loves to go down there. It’s supposed to be something awesome.
Mom asked this morning, “Do you think you can go tomorrow if you feel so bad?”
I replied, “I’m going regardless how I feel.”
Always remember
I love you,
Naomi
October 7
My beloved Naomi,
I arrived home from school, took a long jog, and am sitting here writing to you still sweaty. I was greatly pleased and very surprised to find one of your wonderful letters waiting for me. I plopped right down to read it without cleaning up. I was hoping all day for a letter, but I tried to keep my hopes down because I thought another one probably wouldn’t come until Friday at the earliest.
It means so much to me that you enjoyed the weekend. I told Lonnie to blow the horn when we went past. They both laughed at me because I was staring out of the truck window at your place. I’m sure I saw you inside the house, and that memory, along with the one of seeing you walk into the house as I was leaving on Sunday evening, still lingers in my mind.
On the way home we stopped in Peoria to go to the home office of the company that makes Lonnie’s freedom phone. It’s the kind of phone that works like a CB radio, and Lonnie’s has been broken for some time. There’s no one around their area able to fix it. Anyway, we had a hard time finding the phone place, driving all over that huge city. Once we did find them, they sent us someplace else for the repair. We ended up getting lost again and having to turn back a few times before locating it.
While Lonnie was inside talking with the repair people, I dashed next door to a hardware store for a flashlight purchase. I dropped mine and broke it last weekend when I was home. I’d also been keeping my eye open for a gift shop where I could buy cards because I’m completely out of them. They are very hard to find in our little town. There was no place nearby that sold cards. We did see a shopping mall later with a “Hallmark” sign on one of the stores. Luella spotted it, and Lonnie nearly wrecked as he cut across the lanes to reach the driveway. But we are all still alive, and I am loaded up on cards.
By that time it was 1:00, so we stopped at a Wendy’s for lunch. I was starving and eagerly gulped down a burger, fries, and Frosty. Yummy, yummy. Lonnie said he had to have two Frostys to get over the fright Luella gave him as she directed him to the driveway for the card store. Luella, of course, claims it wasn’t her fault at all, that she was only pointing toward the store.
Just think—when you next get a card from me—there was almost bloodshed buying the things. What an awful thought, but I’m feeling right awful at the moment.
I miss you,
Eugene
October 7
My dearest Eugene,
Mom, Rosanna, Betsy, and I came home from Bloomington at around four this afternoon. We left after five this morning, and my was it a blast! We browsed the stores, bought material, just did this and that and the other. Then we went to Dutch Kitchen for lunch. Betsy and I each ordered a shrimp basket. Betsy managed to eat all of hers, but I couldn’t so I brought mine home and Dad ate the rest. Now he won’t be hungry for supper, but he doesn’t seem to mind. I guess my flu is still not over, as I feel a headache threatening again.
I should have been smart and stayed away from the youth gathering last night, but I decided to go at the last minute. My flu symptoms weren’t too bad while we played volleyball. Especially with Don and Joseph Miller playing beside me. Don can be a real cutup, and he kept me laughing with his wisecracks.
We girls went inside early, but the host family offered nothing to eat but homemade ice cream and cinnamon rolls. Those are excellent tasting foods if I’d had other healthy things to eat earlier, but I didn’t. Dan had told us to eat supper before we came, but I ignored the instructions since I was feeling yucky. Thankfully things didn’t get out of hand, even with not eating. I would have cried if I’d ruined the trip into Bloomington for myself.
Robert was very sympathetic all evening at the gathering, which I thought was nice of him. When we were playing the last game, I must have looked pretty rough because Phillip Yoder said, “Well, Naomi, you can just go sit down and rest and think of Eugene.”
Robert said, “You don’t have to sit down to think about him, do you?”
And I said, “Certainly not.”
It’s always nice when people around you understand, especially boys.
Please tell Lonnie and Luella “hi” for me.
Late evening…
Here I am again after writing you a letter this afternoon and getting it ready for tomorrow. I don’t know exactly why I’m writing now except I’m so lonely for you. I don’t know what’s the matter with me. It seems so much harder to be apart from you since your trip back. Maybe it’s because I’m still not feeling well. I know it will be a great relief once I don’t have this constant headache.
We bought three storybooks on the trip into Bloomington, and I’ve read one through already. Maybe I shouldn’t read with my head throbbing, but it takes my mind off the pain—some of it anyway. I’m lying on my bed, holding my head with one hand, and writing with the other. My room is an absolute, total disaster and does nothing to revive my spirits. I suppose I will get things a little in order before I shut down for the night.
Dad and Mom went to the school meeting since they like to keep up with what’s going on.
Friday afternoon…
I didn’t go to work after all this morning because I still had my headache. Thankfully, it is somewhat better now. The young folks have something going tonight. They’re going to make cider at the Harveys using hand presses. Yah, that should be fun, and we’ll have cider to drink afterward. Don is driving tonight, and we’ll leave right after chores.
How is school going? You haven’t written anything about it recently.
I have to work tomorrow for Mrs. Bach because she wants to go somewhere again. That means John to take care of and that awful dog. Somehow I have to make friends with him, but he is a nasty creature with bulging eyes and chops that nearly drag the floor. I guess God made all creatures, and somewhere in the human heart there must be love hidden for all of them.
I long to see you so much,
Naomi
October 11
My dearest Naomi,
Things are exceedingly boring around here. I often try to imagine what you might be doing. I dwell on the sweet memories of our last time together, which tends to make the situation worse instead of better. It seems like years since I’ve seen you.
My mom wrote yesterday. I followed your suggestion and sent her a fat letter. It’s hard to imagine that my school news is interesting to anyone, but she thought it was. And that’s about all the news I had to send her. She said she’s sending books for me to read, and she also tried to give me a pep talk. Apparently some of my misery must have come through.
Last night the young folks attended services at a street mission fifteen miles from here. The place is open to anyone who needs meals and a bed for the night. There is one catch though. Before anyone stays for the night they have to attend an hour-long gospel service. When we arrived, there were around thirty men sitting inside, looking like a tough bunch. They had the men sitting on one side, and the visitors on the other. One of the young folk boys presented a devotion, and the whole youth group sang for twenty minutes. Afterward, Stanley, one of the married men who came along, gave a thirty-minute sermon.
I think I would like working in a place like that. It would give a worthwhile feeling to help people who have so terribly lost their way. Especially people who are living out on the streets.
I hope you are keeping yourself entertained and that the flu bug has passed on by now.
The best to you.
Love you,
Eugene
October 11
Hello, dear Eugene,
How does this find you? Well and happy, I hope.
Don, Dad, and Lester went fishing at the Yoders’ pond tonight. They left with the open buggy. Brrr…it’s pretty chilly and cloudy. They’re planning to fish till late. I can’t see what is so fun about fishing, but they were all excited.
Last night was a beautiful evening, but according to how I was feeling it should have been raining cats and dogs. I cried upstairs with my head under the pillow for a long time so Mom couldn’t hear me. It must be the aftereffects of that nasty flu spell I had.
To top things off, I had a big disappointment tonight when I arrived home. Boo hoo…no letter from you. I will try to wait patiently.
You might not have much news to write about, but it would’ve been great just to hear from you. Maybe it is better I don’t have you around at the moment since I’m fighting back the tears. But having you here would make them go away, wouldn’t it? Yes, it would. Now I’m really crying, and it’s all your fault.
I had to struggle against tears more than a few times today, and I almost cried in public, which was a new experience for me. Usually when I’m around people I’m not bothered with the threat of tears. Thankfully things got better as the day progressed. Perhaps I shouldn’t be telling you this, lest you think there’s something seriously wrong with me or with our relationship. There’s not. It’s just that I’m so sad and can’t really explain why. I hope you can understand.
Church was at Bishop Enos’s, and the young folks had a short singing in the afternoon for some of the old people who live in town. Dad didn’t want me taking our horse Vick because he’s lame, so we hitched up the younger one. I don’t think Dad would have let me drive him without Don along. Can you believe that?
I didn’t want to go at all, really, not with such sorrow hanging over my head, but I thought it’d look silly if I didn’t. When we walked out to the buggy, I wavered again at the thought of the drive into town.