Lara’s heart ached at the hatred in her sister’s voice. “I never meant to be bossy, but there is work that has to be done, and I need your help.”
Jo shook her head. “You’ll do fine without me.”
How would Jo find a job when she despised working so much? She couldn’t bear the thought of her sister alone in an unfamiliar town. “But you’re only sixteen. What will you do?”
“I’m not sure, but I won’t live in a dirt house again.” Jo yanked her spare dress off the peg and folded it. “I’ll do whatever I have to.”
“Don’t say that. There are awful men out there who prey on beautiful young women. You have no idea of the horrible life some women endure just to get by. Why would you want that when you have a family who loves you so much?”
Jo shook her head. “You’ll never understand, so don’t bother trying. My mind is made up.”
Lara’s throat tightened as she fought the tears burning her eyes. She glanced at Michael on the far side of the bed, glad their discussion hadn’t awakened him. “Have you talked to Grandpa about it?” Finally, she noticed a chink in her sister’s armor.
“No. I can’t. You’ll have to tell him.”
Lara gasped. “You’d leave and not tell him good-bye? It will break his heart.”
Jo shrugged. “I can’t do it.”
A soft knock sounded on the door, and Lara answered. Grandpa glanced at her then Jo with a worried expression marring his normally happy features. “Gabe has come calling.”
Lara nodded. She knew it would do no good to talk to Jo when she was in one of her moods, so she walked out but then paused and looked at her grandfather. “I think you and Jo need to have a talk.”
“Lara!”
Ignoring her sister’s angry cry, she strode to Gabe, her time with him ruined. Had Jo purposely picked that moment to tell her she was leaving, knowing how it would upset her?
Gabe held up a lantern with one hand and reached out with the other, taking her hand. “What’s wrong?”
She shook her head. “Get me away from here. Please.”
Gabe tugged on her hand, and she numbly followed as he walked toward the creek. Using the lantern to see their way, they jumped across at a particularly narrow spot and then meandered through the trees. Finally Gabe stopped, hung the lantern on a notch on a tree, and turned toward her. “Care to tell me what’s upset you so badly?”
Her lower lip quivered. A tear ran down her cheek. “I’ve tried so hard to be a mother to Jo. She was so young when our parents died, and she has always been angry that I’ve tried to mother her and teach her proper skills. She resents that I ask her to help with the chores and things that need doing.”
Gabe ran his hands up and down her arms, resting them lightly on her shoulders. “She is a bit headstrong, from what I’ve seen of her, but I doubt she really resents you.”
“You’re wrong—she truly does. I’ve always known it and tried to make allowances by not pushing her to work too hard. I had hoped as she grew older—” A sob broke loose, and Lara buried her face in her hands, unable to stop her tears.
“Shh…” Gabe tugged her closer, enveloping her in his arms.
She wrapped her arms around him, desperately needing his comfort. Next to raising her son, the most important task God had given her was to raise her sister to be a godly woman and to one day be a helpmate to her husband, but she’d failed miserably.
Gabe gently pressed her head against his chest as he placed soft kisses on her temple, driving away all thoughts of her sister. She sniffed, knowing she should step away, but she wasn’t ready to. She was so tired of being strong for everyone else that she wanted to cherish this moment with Gabe, even if it meant nothing to him. No, that wasn’t true. She wanted his hugs—his kisses. She wanted him to take care of her like he had been. She loved him.
Leaning back, she swiped her eyes with a handkerchief that she’d tugged from her sleeve and then wiped her nose. There was nothing less romantic than a runny nose. She smiled.
“That’s better.” Gabe brushed at the dampness on her cheeks with his thumbs as his gaze roved her face. “Lara, surely you know how I care for you. This isn’t how I planned to declare my feelings, but I’ve fallen desperately in love with you.”
Her heart quickened, and she brushed her hand down his cheek. “Me, too, Gabe. I don’t know how it happened, but I’ve fallen for you, too.”
His eyes glistened as her words lit a fire in them, and then he leaned down, claiming her lips and heart like he’d staked a claim on her land. But none of that mattered anymore. She looped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer, her lips crushed against his. Her rapid heartbeat kept a perfect tempo with his as he left little doubt to the truth of his confession of love. Having been a married woman, she knew the danger she was walking into. After a few minutes of wonderful ecstasy in Gabe’s arms, she reluctantly drew back, allowing her rapid breaths to meld with his.
He pressed his forehead against hers. “Marry me, Lara. Share this land with me, and let’s build a home and a family together.”
She gasped at the unexpected proposal, and Gabe instantly sobered.
“I—I…”
She pressed her fingers to his lips. “Don’t say anything. I was just surprised because we haven’t known one another very long.”
He nodded and seemed to relax.
“What I said was true. I care deeply for you, too, but I think we need a bit more time to get to know one another before we consider marriage.”
The disappointment was obvious on his handsome face. He took hold of her hand. “Lara, I’ve never been married. Never really expected to find a woman I thought was as good as my mother, but I have. And I’m not letting you go. I realize you’ve recently lost your husband—” He looked away, and a muscle in his jaw twitched. He cleared his throat. “Take all the time you need to be sure I’m the right man for you.”
“Thank you, Gabe. That’s kind of you to not rush me. Your kindness is what first drew me to you.”
He smiled. “I don’t think anyone has ever said that to me before.”
Lara took his arm and turned him back toward home. “I’m surprised.”
He reclaimed the lantern and held it high, illuminating their path. Insects hovered around it as if needing the heat it shed. “I haven’t always lived a life that I was proud of.”
The comment jolted her for a moment, but then she assumed he was referring to his gambling days. “We all have regrets, Gabe.”
She had plenty of them as she thought back over her years raising Jo and the many mistakes she’d made. She understood what he meant, but it still didn’t stop her from wishing she could do things over.
Chapter 23
Shortly after lunchtime, Jo rode Sunny into Guthrie, with Gabe, Lara, and Michael following in the wagon behind her. Once again, Lara had intruded in her life. Why couldn’t she just let her go rather than make the trip with her? It would have made things less painful for both of them.
Excitement pushed aside her frustration as she scanned the active town, far bigger than Caldwell. On both sides of the streets and for as far as she could see, tents had been erected and wooden buildings were in various stages of construction. Hammering echoed through the town. Surely, with so many new businesses going up, she ought to be able to find employment.
Her thoughts shifted to Mark Hillborne. Had the handsome man won his land and set up a store? She needed to find him, but it could take days with so many places to check. Since he came in on the train, it made sense to start first near the depot, wherever that might be. As if an omen, a loud train whistle blasted across the town. Jo looked for the smoke and found it on the lower end of Guthrie. Now, if only she could get rid of her escort.
But then she couldn’t keep Sunny, as much as she’d like to. She huffed a laugh. Lara would probably have her arrested and strung up for horse stealing. No, that wasn’t fair. Her sister might push her to work, but she never held a grudge.
A whistle drew her gaze, and a man in a plaid shirt and denim pants removed his sweat-stained hat and bowed. Other men along the street paused as she rode past, gazing, whistling, and shouting things that should have made her cheeks turn red. Jo secretly enjoyed the attention, but she kept her head pointed straight ahead, mostly for her sister’s sake. She didn’t want Lara to know how much she craved masculine attention. She would obviously have no trouble getting the respect she longed for. If only she could find a job and a decent place to live, then she could enjoy the stares of the town’s men.
She had no idea where to look for Mark. Since Gabe was headed to a store in the depot area, she slowed Sunny and pulled into step with the horses pulling the buckboard. It was as good a place as any to start.
“Aunt Jo, can I ride with you?” Michael hopped up from where he sat behind the bench.
Her gaze shot to Lara, but her sister looked down into her lap. “I don’t mind since we’re in town.”
Jo wasn’t sure why Lara wouldn’t let her son ride with her out in the countryside, but she kept quiet and pulled closer to the wagon. Gabe handed Lara the reins, stood, and lifted Michael up, handing him to Jo. She caught Gabe’s stoic gaze as she settled her nephew in front of her. He was angry with her for upsetting Lara. Ah well. There was no helping that. Lara would keep her around her whole life, slaving away, if she could. Jo lifted her chin. It was past time she was on her own.
A shiver of concern crept up her spine, and she hugged Michael. What if she was doing the wrong thing, venturing out on her own? Grandpa had been more than a little stunned when Lara forced her into telling him her plans last night. He had argued with her, finally leaving in a huff. She’d read the pain in his eyes and knew he thought he’d failed her, just like Lara did, but they didn’t understand. They never had. Losing the parents she loved so much had done something to her. Killed a part of her, deep inside, just like it had Jack. She didn’t understand it herself—or maybe it was just the way she’d been made. She wasn’t sweet and helpful like Lara. Even Michael took more delight in helping than she ever had. The only way for her to find her true self was to get away from her smothering family members.
She would miss them, especially Michael. Leaning over, she placed a kiss on her nephew’s curly haired head. The boy gave unconditional love, something she so badly craved.
Gabe pulled the wagon to a halt, and Jo realized they’d ridden almost all the way through town, turning onto several other streets while she’d been lost in her thoughts. When she looked over at the store he stopped in front of, her heart lurched. Hillborne’s General Store. How providential was that?
Excitement zipped through her as Gabe hopped off the wagon, helped Lara down, then turned to reach for Michael.
“Do you know Mark Hillborne?” she asked.
His brows lifted as he pulled Michael from the saddle. “You know him?”
She nodded. “We met in Caldwell.”
“That must be where I’ve seen him before. After I left his store that first time, I thought I’d seen him somewhere. I think maybe we stayed at the same hotel in Caldwell, although we never actually met then.” Gabe set the boy down then offered her a hand.
She shook her head and dismounted. “You all go on in. I want to walk around for a bit.”
“But—” Lara started to say something then ducked her head and turned away.
Jo saw the hurt in her eyes and tried to ignore it. She didn’t particularly want her sister to overhear her conversation with Mark, if he was there. Nor did she necessarily want Lara knowing where she was working and living. After letting Sunny get a drink from the trough, she tied him to a new hitching post and looked around.
All manner of shops had been established in the town that had been open prairie only a week ago. It was a bit boggling to the mind, and it excited her to think she might be part of something historical—the beginning of a town.
She really didn’t want to look around, but she hadn’t wanted to enter with her family. The man to the right of Mark’s store had set up a cobbler business. He glanced up from his work and stared at her. “Can I he’p ye, miss?”
Jo shook her head and took off between Mark’s huge tent and the cobbler’s small one. At the back entrance, she peered inside, hoping to get a glimpse of Mark. Some other man—smaller and far less handsome—was helping Gabe as Lara and Michael looked around. Disappointment washed over her. Had Mark maybe gone out of town to purchase supplies? Or had he set up the store and hired a man to run it then returned to St. Louis? She hadn’t realized how much she’d counted on seeing him again until that moment.
Someone behind her cleared his throat, and she spun, her heart racing.
“Can I help—Jo?” Mark’s eyes blazed with recognition, and he stepped forward, taking hold of her hands. “I can’t tell you how much I’ve hoped to see you again.”
“Me, too.” She peeked behind her and saw Gabe moving toward the rear of the tent. “Do you have time to take a walk? There’s something I’d like to talk to you about.”
He offered his arm. “I have all day for you, my dear.”
She glowed, delighted with his attention and willingness to leave work to spend time with her.
“So, I’m guessing your family must have gotten a claim, otherwise you wouldn’t still be in these parts.”
“Not exactly. But that’s not what I’m here for.”
He escorted her across several blocks to the quieter outskirts of Guthrie then turned to face her. “So, tell me what you’ve come to discuss.”
Jo sucked in a breath, her pulse racing. Please say yes. “I need a job, and I’m hoping I can work for you.”
Gabe stared across the campfire at Lara, wishing he could say something to ease her pain at leaving her sister in Guthrie. Their late dinner back home had been a solemn affair with Michael exhausted from the long trip and Daniel and Lara silent and hurting after Jo had gone missing. Luke had prepared supper knowing they’d be late returning, but then he’d wolfed down his food and disappeared into the night.
Daniel scraped his half-eaten meal into the slop pot and set the tin plate on top of Luke’s. “Guess I’ll turn in, though I don’t suspect I’ll sleep much.”
Lara rose and gave him a hug. “I’ll be in soon.”
He nodded and trudged toward the dugout.
Lara sighed. “I hope this doesn’t bring on another bout of malaria.”
Gabe rose and tugged Lara to her feet. “I’m sorry about Jo. I wish I knew something to say that would help you.”
She shook her head. “I lost my parents—my brother—and now m–my sister.” She choked back a sob as tears welled in her eyes. “Just hold me, please.”
“Gladly.” He stepped forward and wrapped her in the shelter of his arms. Disappointments and hurts were a part of life, but the one that had rocked Lara’s world today was equal to the rift made when the Grand Canyon, which he’d once read about, had cracked open. He could see her worrying herself sick over her sister when he wanted her to be happy.
He held her, rocking gently and enjoying their closeness. He’d never felt anything toward the few women he’d been attracted to in the past compared to what he did for Lara. He’d never been in love before, and now he wished he hadn’t wasted so much of his life in a saloon. He also understood why his ma had wanted him to marry a godly woman, as he believed Lara was. There was a sweetness to them—a wholesomeness a man didn’t find in a saloon girl.
“Gabe.”
“Uh-huh?”
“I’ll marry you.”
Joy surged through him, but just like a soaring bird suddenly shot, his delight plummeted. He set her back so he could see her face in the flicker of firelight. “As happy as it makes me feel to hear that wonderful news, sweetheart, I don’t want you deciding to marry me when you’re so upset. It’s too important.”
“But I do.”
“Good. I’ll remain very hopeful, but I think you need to wait until your feelings aren’t so raw
to make that decision. All right?”
She nodded. “When did you become so wise?”
“I’d like to say I always have been, but it’s not true. I suppose I’ve wised up since being around you. You make me want to be a better man than I have been in the past.”
“That’s a kind thing to say.” She yawned and quickly covered her mouth. “I suppose I should go inside, but I doubt I will sleep.”
He kissed her forehead then tugged her close again and gently claimed her lips. She melded against him, so small, compliant, and responsive. He traveled across her face, placing kisses on her temple, eyes, and the end of her nose, and then he found her lips again, where he deepened his kiss. She moaned and pressed against him, sending warning thoughts as his body responded. She was vulnerable tonight, and he didn’t dare take advantage of her—he didn’t want to. He hated saying good night.
But he had to.
“Lara, I’d better go.”
“I know, but I don’t want you to.”
“Believe me, I’d rather stay here, too, but we’ll both be sorry if I do.”
“You’re right, of course.” She reached up and laid her palm against his chin. “Thanks for holding me. I really needed the comfort.”
He kissed her palm, wrapped her arm around his, and walked her to the door. “Sleep tight, sweetheart.”
“I’ll try.” Her lips tilted in a halfhearted smile. “Maybe if I do, I’ll dream of you.”
He chuckled. “I know exactly who I’ll be dreaming about. Good night.”
He stayed until she went inside and closed the creaky door. Tomorrow, he’d find something with which to grease it. After checking the fire to make sure it was dying, he gathered up the lantern and walked back to his tent, thinking on the day’s events. There was a part of him that would like to paddle Joline Jensen for her insensitivity toward the people who loved her. The stubborn, independent girl was in for some hard knocks, he was afraid. He clenched his fist as he thought how hard they all had searched for her, but to no avail. Lara hated leaving, but Jo had made her wishes clear.
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